Although software programs are now available for translating languages, there are still many advantages to learning foreign languages. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Although software programs are now available for translating languages, there are still
many advantages to learning foreign languages.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The probliferation of technology parallel with the invention of translating programs leads to the convenience of understanding different languages among people residing in distinct regions. While some people advocate for overusing such methods to competently utilize other dialects, I firmly agree with the idea that it is worth learning novel languages for several reasons.
Learning foreign dialects could bring benefits for workers. Firstly, deeply understanding other languages could provide more job opportunities for employees seeking for a high-paying job. Specifically, most companies demand its candidates possessing at least one language qualification because of globalization, which means it is accessible to link with foreign partner companies. As a result, such workers become valuable assests of companies, contributing to gain their profits. Secondly, language abilities serve as a special tool using for improving mental aptitude of employees. To be more specific, the process of learning dialects could help the cortical growing up , where many brain cells which are important to the process of information. Therefore, workers could gain their productivity as a result of learning languages.
In addition, although the convenience of translating appliances is undeniable, that of learning language plays a vital role in the connection of human being. First and foremost, such appliances can not replace the important of deeply understanding other people. Precisely, the intelligence of such apps was created by humans, who can actually understand the implication of each words in sentences. As a reason for that, people will enhance their own perspectives if they are in communications with foreigners. Second, the indispensability of learning languages performes in exchanging culture among countries. It means that language abilities could be seen as a fundamental factor of the process of globalization. For example, Vietnam's Prime Minister Nguyen Phu Trong could deeply use English to make important decisions in the conference of Asia league, where people exchange ideas and cultures by English.
In conclusion, although using translating tools becomes ubiquitous, I agree with the idea that learning languages offers many benfits for human kind and workers, such as promoting globalization processes and providing job opportunities.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"The probliferation" -> "The proliferation"
Explanation: Correcting the spelling error from "probliferation" to "proliferation" ensures the use of the correct term, which refers to the rapid spread or increase of something, in this case, technology and language translation programs.
"parallel with" -> "alongside"
Explanation: "Alongside" is a more precise and formal term than "parallel with" in this context, indicating simultaneous development or occurrence of events.
"leads to the convenience of understanding" -> "facilitates the understanding"
Explanation: "Facilitates" is a more precise and formal verb than "leads to the convenience of," which is somewhat vague and informal.
"competently utilize" -> "effectively utilize"
Explanation: "Effectively" is more appropriate than "competently" in this context, as it directly relates to the ability to use something well, which is more relevant to language skills.
"novel languages" -> "new languages"
Explanation: "New" is a more commonly accepted term in academic writing than "novel," which can imply something unusual or experimental, which is not the intended meaning here.
"seeking for a high-paying job" -> "seeking high-paying jobs"
Explanation: Removing "for" after "seeking" corrects the grammatical structure and makes the phrase more direct and formal.
"accessible to link with" -> "enables connections with"
Explanation: "Enables connections with" is more precise and formal, clearly conveying the idea of facilitating relationships between companies.
"valuable assests" -> "valuable assets"
Explanation: Correcting the spelling of "assets" to "assets" ensures the use of the correct term, which refers to valuable or useful things or qualities.
"using for improving" -> "for improving"
Explanation: Removing "using for" simplifies the phrase and aligns better with formal academic style, which often avoids unnecessary prepositions.
"the cortical growing up" -> "cortical development"
Explanation: "Cortical development" is a more precise and scientifically accurate term than "the cortical growing up," which is informal and imprecise.
"which are important to the process of information" -> "essential for processing information"
Explanation: "Essential for processing information" is more direct and formally appropriate than the vague and awkward "which are important to the process of information."
"the convenience of translating appliances" -> "the convenience of translation tools"
Explanation: "Translation tools" is a more specific and formal term than "translating appliances," which is less commonly used and sounds informal.
"the important of deeply understanding" -> "the importance of deep understanding"
Explanation: Correcting the grammatical structure and using "importance" instead of "important" improves the sentence flow and formality.
"performes" -> "performs"
Explanation: Correcting the spelling error from "performes" to "performs" ensures the use of the correct verb form.
"human kind" -> "humankind"
Explanation: "Humankind" is the correct noun form, referring to the species of humans, whereas "human kind" is grammatically incorrect and less formal.
"offers many benfits" -> "offers many benefits"
Explanation: Correcting the spelling error from "benfits" to "benefits" ensures the use of the correct term, which is essential for maintaining the integrity of the text.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Task Response: 7

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay addresses the prompt by discussing the advantages of learning foreign languages in the context of the availability of translation software. The author clearly states their position in favor of learning languages, which is a direct response to the question. However, while the essay outlines several benefits of language learning, it could have more explicitly acknowledged the counterargument regarding the usefulness of translation software. This would demonstrate a more balanced approach to the question.
- How to improve: To enhance the response, the essay could include a brief discussion on the advantages of translation software, even if the author disagrees with relying solely on it. This would show a more comprehensive understanding of the topic and strengthen the argument for learning languages.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position that supports learning foreign languages over relying on translation software. The author consistently reinforces this viewpoint throughout the essay. However, there are moments where the phrasing could be clearer, such as in the transition between discussing job opportunities and mental benefits, which could confuse the reader about the main argument.
- How to improve: To improve clarity, the author should ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that directly relates to the thesis. Additionally, using transitional phrases can help guide the reader through the argument more smoothly.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents several ideas supporting the benefits of learning languages, such as job opportunities and cognitive benefits. However, some points lack depth and could benefit from further elaboration. For example, the claim about cognitive benefits is mentioned but not sufficiently explained or supported with evidence or examples.
- How to improve: To strengthen the support for ideas, the author should provide specific examples or data to back up claims. For instance, citing studies that show the cognitive benefits of learning languages or providing statistics on job market demands could enhance the argument’s credibility.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the advantages of learning foreign languages. However, there are instances where the language used is somewhat convoluted, which can detract from the main argument. For example, phrases like "the intelligence of such apps was created by humans" could be clearer and more directly related to the topic.
- How to improve: To maintain focus, the author should strive for clarity in expression. Simplifying complex sentences and ensuring that each point directly supports the thesis can help keep the essay on topic. Additionally, reviewing the essay for any off-topic statements or overly complex language can improve coherence.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a clear argument in favor of learning foreign languages. By addressing the suggestions for improvement, the author can enhance the clarity, depth, and overall effectiveness of their response.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear argument in favor of learning foreign languages, structured into distinct sections that address different aspects of the topic. The introduction sets the stage by acknowledging the role of translation technology while asserting the importance of language learning. Each body paragraph focuses on specific advantages, such as job opportunities and cognitive benefits, which helps maintain a logical flow. However, the transition between ideas could be smoother; for instance, the shift from job opportunities to cognitive benefits feels abrupt and could benefit from clearer linking phrases.
- How to improve: To enhance logical organization, consider using transitional phrases that explicitly connect ideas. For example, after discussing job opportunities, a phrase like "In addition to career benefits, learning languages also enhances cognitive abilities" would provide a clearer link between the two points.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct advantage of learning languages. However, the first paragraph could be further divided to separate the introduction from the first main point about job opportunities. This would enhance clarity and allow each point to be developed more fully. Additionally, the conclusion succinctly summarizes the main arguments but could be more impactful by reiterating the significance of the points made.
- How to improve: Consider breaking the first paragraph into two: one for the introduction and one specifically for the job opportunities point. This would give each section more focus. In the conclusion, reiterate the key points with a stronger emphasis on their implications for individuals and society.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs some cohesive devices, such as "Firstly," "Secondly," and "In addition," which help to structure the argument. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat limited, and there are instances where the connections between sentences could be clearer. For example, the phrase "As a reason for that" is awkwardly used and does not effectively link the preceding and following sentences.
- How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, incorporate a wider range of linking words and phrases. For instance, instead of repeating "Firstly" and "Secondly," consider using "Moreover," "Additionally," or "Furthermore" to introduce new points. Additionally, clarify connections between sentences by using phrases like "This illustrates that…" or "Consequently, this leads to…" to enhance the overall flow and coherence of the essay.

By addressing these areas of improvement, the essay can achieve a higher level of coherence and cohesion, potentially raising the band score in this criterion.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a fair range of vocabulary, with terms such as "proliferation," "globalization," "indispensability," and "cultural exchange." However, the use of vocabulary is somewhat repetitive and lacks variation in synonyms. For instance, the term "languages" and its variations appear frequently without sufficient synonyms to diversify the language used.
- How to improve: To enhance lexical variety, the writer could incorporate synonyms for "languages" (e.g., "tongues," "dialects," "linguistic systems") and other frequently used terms. Additionally, using more advanced vocabulary related to the topic, such as "multilingualism" or "cross-cultural communication," could elevate the essay’s lexical resource.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: There are instances of imprecise vocabulary usage that detract from the clarity of the argument. For example, the phrase "the important of deeply understanding other people" should be "the importance of deeply understanding other people." Additionally, "assests" is a misspelling of "assets," which affects the precision of the vocabulary used. The phrase "cortical growing up" is also unclear and could be better expressed as "cognitive development."
- How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should carefully proofread the essay to catch spelling and grammatical errors. Furthermore, selecting more appropriate phrases that convey the intended meaning clearly will enhance the overall effectiveness of the argument. For example, replacing vague terms with specific descriptors can clarify the message.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several spelling errors, such as "probliferation," "assets," "performes," and "benfits." These errors not only detract from the professionalism of the writing but also can confuse the reader regarding the intended meaning.
- How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, the writer should engage in regular practice of spelling common academic vocabulary and utilize spell-check tools when drafting essays. Additionally, reading extensively can help reinforce correct spelling through exposure to well-written texts. A final proofreading stage before submission is crucial to catch any remaining errors.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a reasonable command of vocabulary, there are notable areas for improvement in terms of variety, precision, and spelling accuracy. By expanding the range of vocabulary, ensuring precise usage, and focusing on spelling, the writer can enhance the overall quality of their lexical resource in future essays.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 6

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a moderate range of sentence structures. For instance, simple sentences like "Learning foreign dialects could bring benefits for workers." are effectively used, but the essay relies heavily on similar constructions, which limits variety. There are attempts at complex structures, such as "the process of learning dialects could help the cortical growing up," but these are often awkwardly phrased and lack clarity. Additionally, the use of phrases like "the convenience of translating appliances is undeniable" shows some complexity but could be better integrated into the overall flow of the argument.
- How to improve: To enhance the variety of sentence structures, the writer should practice using a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences. Incorporating more varied conjunctions and relative clauses can help create more sophisticated sentences. For example, instead of "Secondly, language abilities serve as a special tool using for improving mental aptitude of employees," the writer could say, "Moreover, language abilities not only serve as a special tool for improving employees’ mental aptitude but also enhance their cognitive flexibility." This would demonstrate a broader range of grammatical structures.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that detract from its clarity. For example, "probliferation" is a spelling error, and "seeking for a high-paying job" should be "seeking a high-paying job." Additionally, phrases like "the cortical growing up" are unclear and grammatically incorrect. The use of commas is inconsistent, particularly in complex sentences, which can lead to confusion for the reader. For instance, "As a result, such workers become valuable assests of companies, contributing to gain their profits" could be better punctuated and rephrased for clarity.
- How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should focus on proofreading for common errors, such as subject-verb agreement and proper word forms. It may be beneficial to review the rules for using articles and prepositions, as seen in phrases like "the important of deeply understanding other people," which should be "the importance of deeply understanding other people." Practicing writing with a focus on punctuation, especially in complex sentences, will also help clarify meaning. Utilizing grammar checking tools or seeking feedback from peers can provide additional support in identifying and correcting errors.

By addressing these areas of improvement, the writer can enhance the overall quality of their essay and potentially achieve a higher band score in the Grammatical Range and Accuracy criteria.

Bài sửa mẫu

The proliferation of technology, alongside the invention of translating programs, leads to the convenience of understanding different languages among people residing in distinct regions. While some people advocate for overusing such methods to effectively utilize other dialects, I firmly agree with the idea that it is worth learning new languages for several reasons.

Learning foreign dialects could bring benefits for workers. Firstly, a deep understanding of other languages could provide more job opportunities for employees seeking high-paying jobs. Specifically, most companies demand that their candidates possess at least one language qualification because of globalization, which means it is accessible to connect with foreign partner companies. As a result, such workers become valuable assets to companies, contributing to their profits. Secondly, language abilities serve as a special tool for improving the mental aptitude of employees. To be more specific, the process of learning dialects could help with cortical development, where many brain cells are essential for processing information. Therefore, workers could gain productivity as a result of learning languages.

In addition, although the convenience of translation tools is undeniable, the importance of learning languages plays a vital role in connecting humankind. First and foremost, such tools cannot replace the importance of deeply understanding other people. Precisely, the intelligence of such apps was created by humans, who can actually understand the implications of each word in sentences. As a result, people will enhance their own perspectives if they are in communication with foreigners. Second, the indispensability of learning languages performs in exchanging culture among countries. This means that language abilities could be seen as a fundamental factor in the process of globalization. For example, Vietnam’s Prime Minister Nguyen Phu Trong could effectively use English to make important decisions at the Asia League conference, where people exchange ideas and cultures in English.

In conclusion, although using translation tools has become ubiquitous, I agree with the idea that learning languages offers many benefits for humankind and workers, such as promoting globalization processes and providing job opportunities.