Fewer and fewer people today write by hand using a pen, a pencil, or brush. What are the reasons for this? Is the decline in writing by hand a positive or negative development?
Fewer and fewer people today write by hand using a pen, a pencil, or brush. What are the reasons for this? Is the decline in writing by hand a positive or negative development?
In recent decades, there has been a noticeable decrease in the number of individuals opting for manual writing tools such as pens, pencils, or brushes. This trend has raised substantial concerns among the public, prompting an exploration of its underlying causes and an assessment of whether this shift is positive or negative.
One significant reason behind the decline in manual writing is the ubiquity and popularity of smartphones and other electronic devices. The advancement of digital technology has made it increasingly convenient for individuals to engage in online writing. These platforms are not only used for communication but also for various activities such as studying and creating shopping lists. Consequently, text messages are gradually supplanting traditional written forms. A recent survey conducted in a high school in China highlighted that students use their smartphones for academic messaging four times more frequently than traditional pen and paper. This underscores the impact of digital accessibility on the diminishing practice of manual writing.
The dwindling practice of manual writing is viewed as a detrimental trend, primarily because it can lead to the loss of the intrinsic beauty and value associated with handwritten words. While online writing offers convenience, digital words are often constrained by a standardized format. If individuals replace handwritten words with digital counterparts, there is a risk of homogenizing writing styles, resulting in a loss of the unique aesthetic qualities of handwritten expressions. A case in point is observed in China, where a significant number of individuals have opted for online writing over manual penmanship. This shift has contributed to a decline in the creation of decorative letters, a valuable traditional heritage in the country. Thus, the decline in manual writing is deemed to result in the loss of cultural and traditional values.
In conclusion, the widespread use of digital technology, particularly smartphones, plays a pivotal role in the diminishing practice of handwriting. This trend is considered negative as it not only affects the unique beauty of handwritten words but also poses a risk to the preservation of cultural and traditional values associated with manual writing.
Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng
Errors and Improvements:
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"There has been a noticeable decrease" -> "There has been a discernible decline"
Explanation: Replacing "noticeable decrease" with "discernible decline" introduces a more formal and precise expression, aligning with the academic tone. -
"substantial concerns among the public" -> "significant concerns within the public sphere"
Explanation: Replacing "substantial concerns among the public" with "significant concerns within the public sphere" enhances formality by using more specific language and avoiding the colloquial term "among." -
"prompting an exploration" -> "prompting an investigation"
Explanation: Substituting "exploration" with "investigation" maintains the formal tone while conveying a more rigorous approach to understanding the reasons behind the trend. -
"manual writing tools such as pens, pencils, or brushes" -> "manual writing instruments like pens, pencils, or brushes"
Explanation: Replacing "tools" with "instruments" and "such as" with "like" contributes to a more refined and formal vocabulary, fitting the context of the essay. -
"ubiquity and popularity" -> "widespread use and prevalence"
Explanation: Replacing "ubiquity and popularity" with "widespread use and prevalence" introduces more formal and precise terms, aligning with academic language. -
"advancement of digital technology" -> "progression of digital technology"
Explanation: Substituting "advancement" with "progression" maintains formality while offering a nuanced term to describe the development of digital technology. -
"increasingly convenient for individuals" -> "progressively convenient for individuals"
Explanation: Replacing "increasingly" with "progressively" maintains the flow while using a slightly more formal term to describe the growing convenience of online writing. -
"engage in online writing" -> "participate in online writing"
Explanation: Substituting "engage" with "participate" contributes to a more formal and academically appropriate vocabulary. -
"Consequently, text messages are gradually supplanting traditional written forms" -> "As a consequence, text messages are gradually replacing traditional written formats"
Explanation: The suggested changes enhance the formality and precision of the statement, avoiding the colloquial "supplanting" and using a more formal term, "formats." -
"highlighted that students use their smartphones" -> "revealed that students utilize their smartphones"
Explanation: Replacing "highlighted" with "revealed" and "use" with "utilize" contributes to a more formal and precise expression, aligning with academic style. -
"digital accessibility on the diminishing practice of manual writing" -> "the impact of digital accessibility on the declining practice of manual writing"
Explanation: Restructuring the sentence enhances clarity and formality by specifying the impact and using "declining practice" instead of "diminishing." -
"dwindling practice of manual writing" -> "diminishing practice of handwriting"
Explanation: Substituting "dwindling" with "diminishing" maintains formality and aligns with the consistent use of terms related to decline. -
"viewed as a detrimental trend" -> "regarded as an adverse trend"
Explanation: Replacing "viewed as" with "regarded as" and "detrimental" with "adverse" contributes to a more formal and precise expression. -
"lead to the loss of the intrinsic beauty" -> "result in the erosion of the intrinsic beauty"
Explanation: Substituting "lead to the loss of" with "result in the erosion of" introduces a more formal and nuanced expression. -
"online writing offers convenience" -> "online writing provides convenience"
Explanation: Changing "offers" to "provides" maintains formality and precision, aligning with academic language. -
"constrained by a standardized format" -> "constrained by standardized conventions"
Explanation: Replacing "standardized format" with "standardized conventions" offers a more precise and formal expression. -
"homogenizing writing styles" -> "standardizing writing styles"
Explanation: The suggested change introduces a more formal and accurate term, aligning with the academic tone. -
"a case in point is observed in China" -> "an illustrative example is evident in China"
Explanation: Substituting "a case in point is observed" with "an illustrative example is evident" contributes to a more formal and precise expression. -
"have opted for online writing" -> "have embraced online writing"
Explanation: Replacing "opted for" with "embraced" maintains formality while conveying a more active and intentional choice. -
"a decline in the creation of decorative letters" -> "a decline in the crafting of ornamental letters"
Explanation: Substituting "creation" with "crafting" and "decorative" with "ornamental" enhances precision and formality. -
"Thus, the decline in manual writing is deemed to result in the loss of cultural and traditional values" -> "Thus, the decline in manual writing is considered to lead to the erosion of cultural and traditional values"
Explanation: The suggested changes introduce more formal and nuanced language, enhancing the expression of the idea.
Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7
Band Score: 7.0
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Quoted text: "In recent decades, there has been a noticeable decrease in the number of individuals opting for manual writing tools such as pens, pencils, or brushes. This trend has raised substantial concerns among the public, prompting an exploration of its underlying causes and an assessment of whether this shift is positive or negative."
- Explanation and Improvement Suggestions: The introduction effectively addresses the topic and presents the writer’s stance, which is positive. However, to enhance the clarity of the essay’s structure, consider providing a concise overview of the main reasons that will be discussed in the body paragraphs. This would guide the reader and establish a clear roadmap for the essay.
- Improved example: "In recent decades, the prevalence of digital technology has led to a decline in the use of traditional writing tools. This essay explores the key reasons behind this shift, focusing on the impact of smartphones and electronic devices. While some view this change as positive, concerns have been raised, prompting an examination of its potential drawbacks."
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Quoted text: "A recent survey conducted in a high school in China highlighted that students use their smartphones for academic messaging four times more frequently than traditional pen and paper. This underscores the impact of digital accessibility on the diminishing practice of manual writing."
- Explanation and Improvement Suggestions: The example provided is relevant and supports the argument; however, to strengthen it further, consider adding specific details from the survey, such as the percentage of students using smartphones compared to traditional methods. This would add depth to your argument and make it more persuasive.
- Improved example: "A recent survey conducted in a high school in China revealed that a staggering 80% of students prefer using smartphones for academic messaging over traditional pen and paper. This significant preference underscores the profound impact of digital accessibility on the diminishing practice of manual writing."
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Quoted text: "The dwindling practice of manual writing is viewed as a detrimental trend, primarily because it can lead to the loss of the intrinsic beauty and value associated with handwritten words."
- Explanation and Improvement Suggestions: While the point is valid, it lacks development and specificity. To improve, provide concrete examples or personal experiences that illustrate the intrinsic beauty and value of handwritten words. This would add depth to your argument and make it more convincing.
- Improved example: "The dwindling practice of manual writing is viewed as a detrimental trend, primarily because it can lead to the loss of the intrinsic beauty and value associated with handwritten words. For instance, receiving a handwritten letter from a loved one carries a personal touch and emotional connection that is often absent in digital messages. This unique quality contributes to the irreplaceable value of handwritten expressions."
Overall, the essay adequately addresses the task and maintains a clear position throughout the response. However, enhancing the examples and providing a more detailed overview in the introduction would contribute to a more fully developed and compelling argument.
Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7
Band Score: 7.0
Explanation:
The essay logically organizes information and ideas with clear progression throughout. It effectively uses a range of cohesive devices appropriately, contributing to the overall coherence. Each paragraph presents a clear central topic, and the essay skillfully manages paragraphing. The use of cohesive devices helps maintain a smooth flow of ideas, and there is a logical relationship between sentences and paragraphs. The introduction, body, and conclusion are well-structured, contributing to the overall coherence and cohesion of the essay.
How to Improve:
To further enhance coherence and cohesion, consider incorporating more varied and complex sentence structures. While the essay uses cohesive devices effectively, ensure consistent and precise use throughout the essay. Additionally, pay attention to the balance of paragraph lengths for optimal organization. Occasionally, review sentence-level transitions to ensure seamless connections between ideas, reinforcing the overall coherence.
Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7
Band Score: 7.0
Explanation: The essay demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary to allow some flexibility and precision in conveying ideas. There is an attempt to use less common lexical items with awareness of style and collocation. The essay effectively discusses the reasons for the decline in manual writing, focusing on the impact of digital technology. It also explores the negative consequences of this trend on the intrinsic beauty and cultural values associated with handwriting. The vocabulary used is varied and appropriate, contributing to a coherent and well-organized essay. However, there are occasional errors in word choice and collocation, and a few instances of awkward phrasing slightly affect the fluency.
How to improve: To enhance the lexical resource and move towards a higher band score, focus on refining the use of less common vocabulary and ensuring precise word choice and collocation. Additionally, pay attention to sentence structures for smoother flow and fluency. Review and revise sentences where errors in word choice or collocation occur to further strengthen the overall lexical proficiency of the essay.
Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7
Band Score: 7.0
Explanation: The essay demonstrates a good command of grammar and punctuation, utilizing a variety of complex sentence structures. There is effective control of language with frequent error-free sentences, contributing to clear communication. The essay incorporates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, showcasing a commendable range of structures. However, a few minor errors are present, such as in the phrase "raising substantial concerns among the public," where the article "the" is missing before "public." Additionally, the sentence "This trend is considered negative as it not only affects the unique beauty of handwritten words but also poses a risk to the preservation of cultural and traditional values associated with manual writing" is complex but slightly awkward in its structure.
How to improve: To enhance grammatical accuracy further, the writer should pay attention to article usage and ensure consistent precision in complex sentence construction. Proofreading for minor errors, such as missing articles, will contribute to an even more polished essay. Additionally, refining the structure of complex sentences to improve flow and coherence would elevate the overall grammatical range and accuracy.
Bài sửa mẫu
In recent times, there has been a discernible decline in the number of people opting for manual writing tools such as pens, pencils, or brushes. This shift has raised significant concerns within the public sphere, prompting an investigation into its underlying causes and an assessment of whether this trend is positive or negative.
One primary reason behind the decline in manual writing is the widespread use and prevalence of smartphones and other electronic devices. The progression of digital technology has made it progressively convenient for individuals to participate in online writing. These platforms are not only used for communication but also for various activities such as studying and creating shopping lists. As a consequence, text messages are gradually replacing traditional written formats. A recent survey revealed that students utilize their smartphones for academic messaging four times more frequently than traditional pen and paper. This highlights the impact of digital accessibility on the declining practice of manual writing.
The diminishing practice of manual writing is regarded as an adverse trend, primarily because it can result in the erosion of the intrinsic beauty and value associated with handwritten words. While online writing provides convenience, digital words are often constrained by standardized conventions. If individuals replace handwritten words with digital counterparts, there is a risk of standardizing writing styles, leading to a loss of the unique aesthetic qualities of handwritten expressions. An illustrative example is evident in China, where a significant number of individuals have embraced online writing over manual penmanship. This shift has contributed to a decline in the crafting of ornamental letters, which is a valuable traditional heritage in the country. Thus, the decline in manual writing is considered to lead to the erosion of cultural and traditional values.
In conclusion, the progression of digital technology, particularly the prevalence of smartphones, plays a pivotal role in the diminishing practice of handwriting. This trend is negative as it not only impacts the unique beauty of handwritten words but also poses a risk to the preservation of cultural and traditional values associated with manual writing.
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