Fewer and fewer people today write by hand using a pen, pencil or brush. What are the reasons for this?
Is the decline in writing by hand a positive or negative development?
In the contemporary world, the number of people who use a pen, pencil or brush to write has experienced a substantial depreciation, which has aroused public discourse. There are some underlying reasons for this tendency and I contend that this inclination brings about some remarkable merits.
Admittedly, there are some compelling reasons regarding handwriting, chief of which is the advent of technology, which promotes people to use electronic devices such as computers, laptops, and AI tools. Indubitably, the advancements of technological devices and equipments offer users an abundance of chances to type texts while enjoying the uttermost and wonderful displays of online utilities, for example, voice text and automatic translation, supporting and easing the process of writing. Furthermore, many people, especially students and officers, tend to have a high preference for using computers or laptops to write down lectures, lessons or work-related information, since the capacity of these devices is high, storing a large amount of information which can be kept with a high level of information security.
The decline of written communication by means of a pen, pencil or brush is irrefutably a positive development, exerting some merits for individuals. The first foremost benefit is the entailment of the high rate of computer literacy in the workplace. Undoubtedly, from an economic perspective, the workforce taking advantage of technology to write are likely to improve their pace of work, limiting the time devoted to handwriting while fostering work productivity, thus helping the company or business to gain more profits. In addition, from an educational perspective, the decline of handwriting means that teachers could integrate technological devices and tools into teaching, presumably providing exceptional learning experience and up-to-date learning sources for learners. Moreover, the limitation of handwriting in school indicates that learners are well-equipped with laptops or computers, which facilitates their taking notes and offers them convenience for review and comfort owing to the light weight of materials they have to bring to school on regular basis.
In conclusion, there are some important catalysts behind the dwindling preference for written communication, associated with the advancements of technology and its capacity and security. However, this propensity has some outstanding upsides in terms of economic and educational points of views.
Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng
Errors and Improvements:
"the number of people who use a pen, pencil or brush to write has experienced a substantial depreciation" -> "the number of individuals employing a pen, pencil, or brush for writing has significantly declined"
Explanation: Replacing "experienced a substantial depreciation" with "significantly declined" maintains formality and clarity while avoiding informal language.
"which has aroused public discourse" -> "triggering public discourse"
Explanation: "Aroused" is slightly informal, and "triggering" is a more precise and academically appropriate term for initiating public discourse.
"Admittedly, there are some compelling reasons regarding handwriting" -> "Indeed, there are compelling reasons related to handwriting"
Explanation: "Admittedly" has a conversational tone; replacing it with "Indeed" maintains formality. "Regarding" is replaced with "related to" for precision.
"chief of which is the advent of technology" -> "chief among them is the advent of technology"
Explanation: Replacing "which" with "among them" and adjusting the structure enhances the formality and clarity of the sentence.
"uttermost and wonderful displays" -> "excellent and sophisticated displays"
Explanation: Replacing "uttermost" with "excellent" and "wonderful" with "sophisticated" provides more precise and formal language without losing the positive connotation.
"voice text and automatic translation, supporting and easing the process of writing" -> "voice-to-text and automatic translation, facilitating and streamlining the writing process"
Explanation: Using "voice-to-text" is more standard, and "facilitating and streamlining" is a more formal expression than "supporting and easing."
"tend to have a high preference for" -> "are inclined to strongly favor"
Explanation: "Tend to have a high preference for" is simplified to "are inclined to strongly favor," aligning with a more formal style.
"since the capacity of these devices is high" -> "given the high capacity of these devices"
Explanation: "Since" is replaced with "given" for formality, and the structure is adjusted for better flow.
"The decline of written communication by means of a pen, pencil or brush is irrefutably a positive development" -> "The decline of handwritten communication is undeniably a positive development"
Explanation: Simplifying "written communication by means of a pen, pencil or brush" to "handwritten communication" and replacing "irrefutably" with "undeniably" maintains formality and clarity.
"The first foremost benefit is the entailment of the high rate of computer literacy in the workplace" -> "The primary benefit is the enhancement of computer literacy in the workplace"
Explanation: "First foremost" is simplified to "primary," and "entailment of the high rate" is replaced with "enhancement" for conciseness and formality.
"limiting the time devoted to handwriting while fostering work productivity" -> "reducing the time allocated to handwriting and enhancing work productivity"
Explanation: "Limiting" is replaced with "reducing" for variety, and "fostering" is retained for a positive connotation.
"In addition, from an educational perspective" -> "Additionally, from an educational standpoint"
Explanation: "In addition" is replaced with "Additionally" for formality, and "perspective" is replaced with "standpoint" for variety.
Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7
Band Score: 7.0
Quoted text: "In the contemporary world, the number of people who use a pen, pencil or brush to write has experienced a substantial depreciation, which has aroused public discourse."
- Explanation and Suggestions for Improvement: The introduction effectively addresses the topic, introducing the decline in traditional writing tools and hinting at the ongoing discussion. However, to enhance clarity, consider providing a brief preview of the main reasons you will discuss in the essay. This would help readers anticipate the key points and improve the overall structure.
- Improved example: "In today’s digital era, the traditional tools of writing, such as pens, pencils, and brushes, are witnessing a significant decline. This trend has sparked widespread discussions, driven by various factors that will be explored in this essay."
Quoted text: "Indubitably, the advancements of technological devices and equipments offer users an abundance of chances to type texts while enjoying the uttermost and wonderful displays of online utilities, for example, voice text and automatic translation, supporting and easing the process of writing."
- Explanation and Suggestions for Improvement: While your point about technological advancements is valid, the expression is somewhat convoluted. Simplify and clarify your language to enhance readability. Additionally, provide specific examples or personal experiences related to the advantages of technology in writing to make your argument more compelling.
- Improved example: "Certainly, modern technological devices provide numerous opportunities for text input, with features like voice-to-text and automatic translation significantly easing the writing process. For instance, voice dictation tools enable users to articulate thoughts effortlessly, enhancing the overall writing experience."
Quoted text: "The decline of written communication by means of a pen, pencil or brush is irrefutably a positive development, exerting some merits for individuals."
- Explanation and Suggestions for Improvement: The position is clear, stating that the decline is positive. However, it would strengthen your argument if you briefly outlined the main benefits you will discuss in the essay. This will provide a roadmap for readers and enhance the coherence of your response.
- Improved example: "Undoubtedly, the decline in traditional writing tools signifies a positive development, offering various merits to individuals. In the subsequent paragraphs, I will delve into the economic and educational advantages that stem from this shift."
Overall, while your essay effectively addresses the task and maintains a clear position, refining the introduction and providing more specific examples in the body paragraphs will enhance the overall coherence and persuasiveness of your response.
Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7
Band Score: 7.0
The essay demonstrates a logical organization of ideas with clear progression throughout. The introduction provides an overview of the topic, and each paragraph presents a distinct aspect of the argument. The writer effectively uses cohesive devices, such as transition words, to connect ideas within and between sentences. The use of cohesive devices is generally appropriate, though there are a few instances of overuse and some minor issues with referencing. The paragraphs have a clear central topic, contributing to the overall coherence.
How to improve:
To enhance coherence and cohesion, consider refining the use of cohesive devices to avoid overuse and ensure more precise referencing. Additionally, focus on maintaining a consistent level of formality and language throughout the essay. Ensure that each paragraph is logically structured and directly contributes to the overall argument. Attention to these details will elevate the essay to a higher band score.
Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7
Band Score: 7.0
The essay demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary, allowing for flexibility and precision. The writer employs less common lexical items with awareness of style and collocation. There are instances of accurate word choice and effective use of vocabulary to convey meaning. However, occasional errors in word choice, spelling, and word formation are present, impacting the overall lexical resource.
The essay effectively discusses the reasons for the decline in handwriting and provides a clear stance on whether it is a positive or negative development. There is a commendable use of vocabulary related to technology, such as "advent," "technological devices," and "automatic translation." The writer successfully incorporates less common lexical items like "irrefutably," "advancements," and "catalysts," contributing to the overall richness of vocabulary.
However, there are instances where word choice is less precise, and a few inaccuracies in spelling and word formation occur, such as "uttermost" instead of "utmost" and "upsides" instead of "advantages." Additionally, some sentences could benefit from more varied and sophisticated expressions.
How to improve:
To enhance the lexical resource and move towards a higher band score, the writer should focus on minimizing errors in word choice, spelling, and word formation. Careful proofreading and consideration of alternative vocabulary choices can contribute to greater precision and sophistication. Furthermore, incorporating a wider variety of expressions and idiomatic phrases would elevate the lexical richness of the essay.
Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7
Band Score: 7.0
Explanation: The essay demonstrates a good command of grammar and punctuation with a variety of complex structures. There is evidence of both simple and complex sentence forms. The majority of sentences are error-free, and the errors that do occur are minor and do not significantly impede communication. The essay effectively uses a range of structures with good flexibility.
How to improve: While the essay generally displays control over grammar and punctuation, there are a few areas that can be improved for higher accuracy. Firstly, some sentences are overly complex, and simplifying them could enhance clarity without compromising the essay’s depth. Additionally, attention to word choice and phrasing can help eliminate minor errors and enhance precision. A careful proofread for subtle grammatical nuances would further refine the essay.
Bài sửa mẫu
In today’s world, there has been a significant decline in the number of individuals opting for traditional methods like pens, pencils, or brushes for writing. This trend has sparked public discourse, and there are compelling reasons related to handwriting, with the chief among them being the advent of technology.
Indeed, technology has played a pivotal role in this shift, encouraging people to embrace electronic devices such as computers, laptops, and AI tools. These devices offer excellent and sophisticated displays, providing users with ample opportunities to type texts efficiently. Features like voice-to-text and automatic translation further streamline the writing process. Many individuals, especially students and professionals, strongly favor using computers or laptops due to their high capacity for storing a large amount of information securely.
The decline of handwritten communication, without a doubt, constitutes a positive development. One primary benefit is the enhancement of computer literacy in the workplace. This shift reduces the time allocated to handwriting, consequently boosting work productivity. From an educational standpoint, the decline in handwriting allows teachers to integrate technological devices into teaching, offering a more exceptional learning experience and up-to-date learning sources for students. Moreover, the limitation of handwriting in schools ensures that learners are well-equipped with laptops or computers, facilitating note-taking and providing convenience for review due to the lightweight nature of electronic devices.
In conclusion, the dwindling preference for traditional written communication is closely tied to technological advancements, offering improved capacity and security. Despite this shift, the positive impacts on both economic and educational perspectives are evident, making it a noteworthy development in our modern era.