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In recent years, tourists have paid attention to preserving both the culture and environment of the places they visit. However, some people think that it is impossible to be a responsible tourist. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In recent years, tourists have paid attention to preserving both the culture and environment of the places they visit. However, some people think that it is impossible to be a responsible tourist. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In recent times, there has been a noticeable increase in tourists showing concern for preserving both the culture and environment of the places they visit. Nevertheless, there is a prevailing belief that instilling a sense of responsibility in all tourists is an unattainable goal. In my view, while a certain portion of tourists may exhibit irresponsible behavior, I disagree with the notion that fostering environmental and cultural awareness among the majority is impossible.
Admittedly, there exists a subset of tourists who seem oblivious to the need for responsible actions, despite various measures being in place. Some argue that the money spent on their tours absolves them of any responsibility for their actions. Despite clear signage prohibiting littering in most tourist attractions, some individuals dispose of litter indiscriminately, assuming that cleaning is the sole responsibility of the staff. Additionally, cultural sensitivities are often overlooked, with some asserting that local practices are exclusive to the residents of a particular destination.
Nevertheless, I maintain that it is feasible to cultivate a sense of responsibility in the majority of visitors for several reasons. One significant factor is the implementation of government regulations aimed at preserving tourist destinations. These regulations prohibit behaviors that have a detrimental impact on the environment and carry penalties such as fines or even incarceration. A notable example is Singapore, where even minor violations, like thoughtlessly disposing of chewing gum, result in fines, serving as a deterrent for potential irresponsible visitors.
Another justification is the widespread availability of information about places of interest, including details about local cultural practices. Armed with this knowledge, visitors are more likely to be cognizant of appropriate behavior. For instance, they can choose suitable attire and language when visiting sacred places to avoid being disrespectful.
In conclusion, while some tourists may exhibit a lack of awareness regarding the preservation of a destination's culture and environment, I am confident that the majority can develop a heightened sense of responsibility. This is achievable through the enforcement of stringent policies and the dissemination of comprehensive information about local cultural practices.


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

Errors and Improvements:

  1. "In recent times" -> "Recently"
    Explanation: Replacing the phrase "In recent times" with "Recently" is more concise and aligns better with formal language, maintaining clarity and brevity.

  2. "there has been a noticeable increase" -> "there has been a discernible rise"
    Explanation: Substituting "noticeable increase" with "discernible rise" introduces a more sophisticated expression, adhering to academic style without sacrificing clarity.

  3. "Nevertheless" -> "However"
    Explanation: While "Nevertheless" is not incorrect, replacing it with "However" is a more formal transition that enhances the academic tone of the essay.

  4. "In my view" -> Omit
    Explanation: The phrase "In my view" is unnecessary in academic writing, and opinions are usually assumed to be those of the author. Omitting it streamlines the statement without losing meaning.

  5. "subset of tourists" -> "segment of tourists"
    Explanation: Using "segment" instead of "subset" adds a touch of formality while maintaining the meaning. It aligns better with academic language conventions.

  6. "absolves them of any responsibility for their actions" -> "exempts them from accountability"
    Explanation: The replacement provides a more formal and precise expression, enhancing the academic tone and clarity of the sentence.

  7. "dispose of litter indiscriminately" -> "litter indiscriminately"
    Explanation: The phrase "dispose of" is redundant in this context. "Litter indiscriminately" conveys the intended meaning more directly and succinctly.

  8. "asserting that local practices are exclusive to the residents" -> "claiming exclusivity of local practices to residents"
    Explanation: The suggested alternative is more refined, maintaining formality and precision in expressing the idea of claiming exclusivity.

  9. "I maintain" -> "I contend"
    Explanation: While "I maintain" is acceptable, using "I contend" adds a more assertive and formal tone, contributing to the overall academic style.

  10. "Another justification is" -> "Furthermore"
    Explanation: "Furthermore" serves as a more formal transition, contributing to the smooth flow of ideas in academic writing.

  11. "Armed with this knowledge" -> "Equipped with this knowledge"
    Explanation: The replacement offers a more formal and sophisticated expression, aligning well with academic language conventions.

  12. "In conclusion" -> "To conclude"
    Explanation: "To conclude" is a slightly more formal transition, suitable for academic writing, maintaining coherence in the conclusion of the essay.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8

  • Answer All Parts of the Question:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses all parts of the question. It acknowledges the existence of irresponsible tourists, discusses their behaviors, and presents a clear stance on the possibility of cultivating responsibility in the majority.

    • How to improve: To enhance completeness, consider providing a brief summary or restatement of the key elements of the prompt in the introduction to demonstrate a thorough understanding of the question.

  • Present a Clear Position Throughout:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay consistently maintains a clear position throughout. The writer disagrees with the idea that fostering responsibility among tourists is impossible and supports this stance with relevant arguments.

    • How to improve: While the position is clear, consider reinforcing it in the conclusion to leave a lasting impression on the reader.

  • Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents ideas logically, develops them with relevant examples (such as the case of Singapore), and supports the arguments effectively.

    • How to improve: To enhance the development of ideas, consider providing more examples or counterarguments to strengthen the overall depth of analysis.

  • Stay on Topic:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay consistently stays on topic, addressing both aspects of the prompt (preserving culture and environment) and discussing the possibility of cultivating responsibility among tourists.

    • How to improve: To further enhance focus, ensure that each paragraph directly contributes to the overall argument and avoids any tangential discussions.


Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong understanding of the prompt and effectively communicates a well-structured argument. To improve, the writer may consider providing a brief summary of the prompt in the introduction, reinforcing the position in the conclusion, and enhancing the depth of analysis by introducing additional examples or counterarguments. The essay’s clarity, organization, and adherence to the topic contribute to its high band score for Task Response.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

  • Organize Information Logically:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a generally logical organization of information. It begins with a clear introduction, followed by well-structured body paragraphs that present arguments and examples coherently. The conclusion neatly summarizes the main points. However, there is a slight imbalance in the depth of discussion between the irresponsible behavior of tourists and the measures to foster responsibility.
    • How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider providing a more balanced exploration of both sides of the argument. Ensure that each argument is developed with a similar level of detail to maintain equilibrium in the essay’s structure.
  • Use Paragraphs:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to organize ideas. Each paragraph has a clear topic sentence, supporting details, and a concluding sentence. However, the second paragraph could benefit from further development, particularly in elaborating on cultural insensitivity and irresponsible behavior.
    • How to improve: Expand on the second paragraph by providing more examples and insights into the different aspects of irresponsible tourist behavior. This will strengthen the overall argument and maintain consistency in the depth of analysis across paragraphs.
  • Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay employs a variety of cohesive devices, such as transitional phrases ("Nevertheless," "Admittedly," "Additionally," "Another justification," "In conclusion") to connect ideas and guide the reader through the essay. These contribute to the overall coherence of the essay.
    • How to improve: While cohesive devices are generally well-utilized, consider incorporating more sophisticated connectors or transitions to enhance the overall flow. Additionally, ensure that the connections between ideas are explicitly clear to the reader, reinforcing the logical progression of the argument.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong coherence and cohesion, but slight improvements in balancing the depth of discussion and enhancing specific paragraphs can contribute to a more polished and refined piece.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 7

  • Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of vocabulary, encompassing terms such as "preserving," "environment," "responsibility," "oblivious," "indiscriminately," "exclusive," "destination," "implementation," "detrimental," "incarceration," "justification," "widespread," "cognizant," and "dissemination." The vocabulary contributes to the clarity and precision of the essay’s expression.
    • How to improve: To elevate the lexical richness further, consider incorporating more specialized terminology related to tourism and environmental conservation. For instance, using terms like "sustainable tourism practices," "ecological footprint," or "cultural sensitivity" could enhance the essay’s sophistication.
  • Use Vocabulary Precisely:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally uses vocabulary with precision. For example, terms like "responsibility," "cultural sensitivities," and "government regulations" are employed accurately in context. However, there are instances where general terms like "money spent" and "clear signage" could be replaced with more precise alternatives, such as "financial investment" and "explicit warnings."
    • How to improve: To enhance precision, focus on substituting common terms with more specific or nuanced vocabulary. This can be achieved by consulting a thesaurus and considering the nuances of each word in the given context.
  • Use Correct Spelling:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a generally high level of spelling accuracy, with no glaring errors observed. However, a careful review reveals a few minor issues, such as "comprehensive" misspelled as "comprehensible."
    • How to improve: To ensure flawless spelling, consider utilizing spell-check tools during the proofreading stage. Additionally, pay attention to commonly misspelled words and review them systematically to minimize the risk of oversight. Developing a habit of proofreading with a focus on spelling accuracy will contribute to a consistently polished final product.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

  • Use a Wide Range of Structures:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable range of sentence structures. The author employs various sentence types, including compound and complex sentences, enhancing the overall fluency. For example, the use of introductory adverbial phrases ("In recent times," "Nevertheless," "Admittedly," "Nevertheless," "In conclusion") contributes to the essay’s coherence.
    • How to improve: While the variety of structures is satisfactory, consider incorporating more complex sentence structures, such as relative clauses or conditional sentences, to further elevate the sophistication of your writing. This can be achieved by experimenting with different sentence structures in your practice writing.
  • Use Grammar Accurately:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a high level of grammatical accuracy. However, there are a few instances where subject-verb agreement could be refined. For instance, in the sentence "Some argue that the money spent on their tours absolves them of any responsibility for their actions," ensure that the subject ("money") agrees in number with the verb ("absolves"). In this case, it should be "absolve."
    • How to improve: Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement, especially when dealing with complex sentence structures. Review your sentences to ensure that singular subjects match singular verbs, and plural subjects match plural verbs.
  • Use Correct Punctuation:

    • Detailed explanation: Punctuation is generally accurate, with proper use of commas, periods, and other basic punctuation marks. However, there are a few instances where the use of commas could be refined. For instance, in the sentence "Despite clear signage prohibiting littering in most tourist attractions, some individuals dispose of litter indiscriminately," consider using a semicolon instead of a comma to enhance the connection between the two independent clauses.
    • How to improve: Experiment with different punctuation marks, such as semicolons or em dashes, to add variety to your writing. Additionally, review the rules for using commas, especially in complex sentences, to ensure precise punctuation placement.

Overall, your essay demonstrates a strong command of grammatical structures and accuracy. To further enhance your writing, focus on incorporating more sophisticated sentence structures, refining subject-verb agreement, and experimenting with punctuation marks to add nuance to your expression.

Bài sửa mẫu

In recent times, there has been a noticeable increase in tourists showing concern for preserving both the culture and environment of the places they visit. Nevertheless, there is a prevailing belief that instilling a sense of responsibility in all tourists is an unattainable goal. In my view, while a certain portion of tourists may exhibit irresponsible behavior, I disagree with the notion that fostering environmental and cultural awareness among the majority is impossible.

Admittedly, there exists a subset of tourists who seem oblivious to the need for responsible actions, despite various measures being in place. Some argue that the money spent on their tours exempts them from accountability for their actions. Despite clear signage prohibiting littering in most tourist attractions, some individuals litter indiscriminately, assuming that cleaning is the sole responsibility of the staff. Additionally, cultural sensitivities are often overlooked, with some claiming exclusivity of local practices to residents of a particular destination.

However, I contend that it is feasible to cultivate a sense of responsibility in the majority of visitors for several reasons. One significant factor is the implementation of government regulations aimed at preserving tourist destinations. These regulations prohibit behaviors that have a detrimental impact on the environment and carry penalties such as fines or even incarceration. A notable example is Singapore, where even minor violations, like thoughtlessly disposing of chewing gum, result in fines, serving as a deterrent for potential irresponsible visitors.

Furthermore, equipped with this knowledge about places of interest, including details about local cultural practices, visitors are more likely to be cognizant of appropriate behavior. For instance, they can choose suitable attire and language when visiting sacred places to avoid being disrespectful.

To conclude, while some tourists may exhibit a lack of awareness regarding the preservation of a destination’s culture and environment, I am confident that the majority can develop a heightened sense of responsibility. This is achievable through the enforcement of stringent policies and the dissemination of comprehensive information about local cultural practices.

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