in spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

Despite the progress in agriculture, there are still numerous individuals worldwide who experience hunger. The causes of this problem will be investigated in this essay, and practical measures will be suggested as more feasible ways to address it.
There are various factors leading to global hunger, including natural disasters and the limited availability of infrastructure. To begin with natural disasters, the frequently occur floods and droughts are exacerbated the hunger issue. In many parts of the world, mostly some countries in Southeast Asia and Africa, which are forced to deal with floods and droughts annually, they will have fewer opportunities to develop activities related to agriculture. These disasters are attributed to crop losses, farmers have to endure and get ready for the upcoming task. Consequently, many citizens in these regions do not have enough food to survive. On the other hand, a lack of modern farming technologies also contributes to the global hunger problem. In many countries, particularly those that are underdeveloped nations, farmers cannot afford to approach advanced machinery. Due to limited financial resources, they resumed using old methods with poor agriculture infrastructure.
To address these issues, several actions can be taken. First, ensure that the public can have enough food. This can be accomplished by making investments in infrastructure; examples include transportation networks, storage facilities, and roads in developing nations. Furthermore, addressing economic inequality is crucial. Governments should provide policies that promote educational methods, create jobs, and provide fair wages. Finally, another way to tackle the hunger problem is to expand international cooperation, which will curtail the difficult distance.
In light of the above, it is reasonable to conclude that natural disasters and lack of modern farming technologies are attributed to increasing world hunger. We can make efforts to enhance food, address economic inequalities, and expand international cooperation in order to eliminate hunger.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"Despite the progress in agriculture, there are still numerous individuals worldwide who experience hunger." -> "Despite agricultural advancements, many individuals worldwide continue to experience hunger."
Explanation: The phrase "numerous individuals" is somewhat informal and vague. "Many individuals" is more precise and maintains an academic tone. Additionally, "continue to experience" is more formal than "experience."
"The causes of this problem will be investigated" -> "The causes of this issue will be examined"
Explanation: "Issue" is a more formal term than "problem," and "examined" is a more precise verb choice than "investigated" in this context.
"practical measures will be suggested as more feasible ways to address it" -> "practical measures will be proposed as more effective strategies to address this issue"
Explanation: "Proposed" is more formal than "suggested," and "effective strategies" is more specific and academically appropriate than "feasible ways."
"the frequently occur floods and droughts are exacerbated the hunger issue" -> "frequent floods and droughts exacerbate the hunger issue"
Explanation: "Frequent" is the correct form to describe the occurrence of floods and droughts, and "exacerbate" is the correct verb form to use in this context.
"they will have fewer opportunities to develop activities related to agriculture" -> "they face reduced opportunities for agricultural development"
Explanation: "Face reduced opportunities for agricultural development" is more concise and formal, improving the flow and precision of the sentence.
"farmers have to endure and get ready for the upcoming task" -> "farmers must endure and prepare for the next agricultural cycle"
Explanation: "Must endure and prepare" is more formal and specific than "have to endure and get ready," and "next agricultural cycle" is a more precise term than "upcoming task."
"many citizens in these regions do not have enough food to survive" -> "many residents in these regions lack sufficient food for sustenance"
Explanation: "Residents" is more formal than "citizens," and "lack sufficient food for sustenance" is a more precise and formal way to express the idea.
"a lack of modern farming technologies also contributes to the global hunger problem" -> "the absence of modern farming technologies also contributes to the global hunger issue"
Explanation: "The absence of" is a more formal expression than "a lack of," and "issue" is preferred over "problem" in academic writing for formal discussions.
"they resumed using old methods with poor agriculture infrastructure" -> "they reverted to outdated methods with inadequate agricultural infrastructure"
Explanation: "Reverted to" is more precise than "resumed using," and "inadequate" is more formal than "poor."
"ensure that the public can have enough food" -> "ensure that the public has access to sufficient food"
Explanation: "Has access to sufficient food" is more formal and precise than "can have enough food."
"addressing economic inequality is crucial" -> "addressing economic inequality is essential"
Explanation: "Essential" is a stronger, more formal term than "crucial" in academic writing.
"curtail the difficult distance" -> "reduce the geographical distance"
Explanation: "Reduce the geographical distance" is clearer and more precise than "curtail the difficult distance," which is awkward and unclear.

These changes enhance the formality, precision, and clarity of the essay, aligning it more closely with academic writing standards.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Task Response: 7

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both parts of the prompt by identifying causes of hunger, such as natural disasters and lack of modern farming technologies, and suggesting solutions like improving infrastructure and addressing economic inequality. The mention of specific regions affected by these issues adds depth to the response. However, the essay could benefit from a more thorough exploration of the causes and solutions, as some points are mentioned but not fully developed.
- How to improve: To enhance the response, the writer could delve deeper into each cause and solution. For instance, providing specific examples of how infrastructure improvements have successfully reduced hunger in certain areas or discussing the role of international organizations in combating hunger could strengthen the argument and provide a more comprehensive answer.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position that acknowledges the complexity of the hunger issue and suggests practical solutions. However, the transition between discussing causes and solutions could be smoother. The phrase "On the other hand" could imply a contrast that is not fully warranted, as both sections are part of the same overarching argument.
- How to improve: To improve clarity, the writer should ensure that transitions between ideas are logical and cohesive. Using phrases like "In addition" or "Furthermore" when introducing solutions would help maintain a consistent flow and reinforce the connection between causes and proposed actions.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents several ideas related to the causes of hunger and potential solutions. However, some ideas lack sufficient elaboration. For example, the mention of "limited financial resources" could be expanded to discuss how this affects farmers’ productivity and food availability. Additionally, the solutions proposed are somewhat general and could benefit from specific examples or data to support their effectiveness.
- How to improve: The writer should aim to extend each idea with more detailed explanations and examples. For instance, discussing specific technologies that could be introduced to farmers or citing successful case studies of infrastructure improvements would provide stronger support for the claims made.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the causes of hunger and potential solutions. However, there are moments where the language becomes slightly vague, such as "curtail the difficult distance," which could confuse readers about its relevance to the topic.
- How to improve: To maintain focus, the writer should ensure that all language used is clear and directly related to the topic. Avoiding vague phrases and ensuring that every sentence contributes to the overall argument will help keep the essay tightly focused on the prompt.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents relevant ideas, it would benefit from deeper analysis, clearer transitions, and more specific examples to enhance its effectiveness and coherence.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure, beginning with an introduction that outlines the problem and the intention to explore causes and solutions. The body paragraphs are organized around specific factors contributing to hunger, such as natural disasters and lack of technology, followed by potential solutions. However, the transition between ideas could be smoother. For instance, the shift from discussing natural disasters to technological issues feels abrupt, lacking a clear linking sentence that ties these ideas together.
- How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using transitional phrases that guide the reader through the argument. For example, after discussing natural disasters, a sentence like “In addition to these environmental challenges, technological limitations also play a significant role in exacerbating hunger” would create a more seamless transition.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct aspect of the topic. The introduction and conclusion are clear, and the body paragraphs are generally well-structured. However, the second body paragraph could be further divided to improve clarity, as it combines two significant issues (lack of technology and infrastructure) into one paragraph, which may overwhelm the reader.
- How to improve: Consider breaking the second body paragraph into two separate paragraphs: one focusing on the lack of modern farming technologies and the other on infrastructure issues. This would allow for a more in-depth discussion of each point and improve readability.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs a variety of cohesive devices, such as “to begin with,” “on the other hand,” and “furthermore,” which help to connect ideas and guide the reader. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat repetitive, with similar phrases appearing multiple times. Additionally, some sentences lack clear connections, making it difficult to follow the argument.
- How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, try incorporating a wider range of linking words and phrases. For instance, instead of repeatedly using “first” and “furthermore,” consider alternatives like “initially,” “additionally,” or “in contrast.” Additionally, ensure that each sentence logically follows the previous one by using phrases that clarify relationships, such as “this leads to,” “as a result,” or “consequently.” This will enhance the overall coherence of the essay.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of coherence and cohesion principles, improvements can be made in the areas of logical organization, paragraph structure, and the variety of cohesive devices used. By implementing these suggestions, the essay can achieve a higher level of clarity and coherence, ultimately leading to a stronger overall score.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, with terms like "natural disasters," "infrastructure," "advanced machinery," and "economic inequality." However, the vocabulary is somewhat repetitive and lacks sophistication. For instance, the phrase "limited availability of infrastructure" could be varied with alternatives like "inadequate infrastructure" or "insufficient infrastructure." Additionally, the use of "practical measures" and "feasible ways" is somewhat redundant.
- How to improve: To enhance the range of vocabulary, the writer should aim to incorporate more synonyms and varied expressions. For example, instead of repeatedly using "hunger," they could use "food insecurity" or "malnutrition." Engaging with a thesaurus or vocabulary-building exercises can help diversify word choice.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains instances of imprecise vocabulary usage. For example, the phrase "the frequently occur floods and droughts" is grammatically incorrect and lacks clarity. It should be rephrased to "the frequent occurrence of floods and droughts." Additionally, the phrase "farmers have to endure and get ready for the upcoming task" is vague; it would be clearer to specify what "upcoming task" refers to.
- How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should focus on clarity and grammatical correctness. They should ensure that phrases are grammatically sound and convey the intended meaning clearly. Reading the essay aloud can help identify awkward or unclear phrases. Furthermore, using specific terms related to agriculture and economics can enhance precision.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally demonstrates good spelling, with no glaring errors. However, there are minor issues, such as "resumed using old methods with poor agriculture infrastructure," where "agriculture" should be "agricultural." Such errors can detract from the overall professionalism of the writing.
- How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, the writer should proofread their work carefully, perhaps using spell-check tools or reading the essay backward to catch errors. Additionally, practicing spelling of commonly used academic vocabulary can help solidify correct usage.

In summary, while the essay achieves a band score of 6 for Lexical Resource, there are clear areas for improvement. By expanding vocabulary, enhancing precision, and ensuring correct spelling, the writer can work towards achieving a higher band score in future essays.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good variety of sentence structures, including complex sentences and conditional phrases. For example, the use of "Despite the progress in agriculture" and "To address these issues, several actions can be taken" shows an ability to initiate ideas with varied structures. However, there are instances of repetitive sentence beginnings and a tendency to rely on similar constructions, such as "In many countries" and "To begin with," which can detract from the overall sophistication of the writing.
- How to improve: To diversify sentence structures further, consider using a wider range of introductory phrases and clauses. For example, instead of repeatedly starting with "In many countries," you might vary it with phrases like "Across various regions" or "In numerous developing nations." Additionally, incorporating more compound-complex sentences could enhance the complexity and fluidity of the writing.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally maintains a good level of grammatical accuracy, but there are notable errors that affect clarity. For instance, the phrase "the frequently occur floods and droughts are exacerbated the hunger issue" contains grammatical mistakes; it should read "the frequently occurring floods and droughts exacerbate the hunger issue." Additionally, punctuation errors, such as the absence of commas in compound sentences, can lead to run-on sentences that confuse the reader. For example, "These disasters are attributed to crop losses, farmers have to endure and get ready for the upcoming task" should be split into two sentences or connected with a conjunction.
- How to improve: To enhance grammatical accuracy, it is essential to proofread the essay for common errors, particularly with verb forms and sentence structure. Practicing the correct use of participles and ensuring subject-verb agreement will also be beneficial. Furthermore, reviewing punctuation rules, especially for compound sentences, can help clarify meaning and improve the overall flow of the essay. Consider using tools or resources that focus on grammar exercises to reinforce these skills.

In summary, while the essay achieves a Band 7 for its effective use of varied structures and generally accurate grammar, focusing on diversifying sentence beginnings and improving grammatical precision will help elevate the writing to a higher band score.

Bài sửa mẫu

There are various factors leading to global hunger, including natural disasters and the limited availability of infrastructure. To begin with natural disasters, the frequent floods and droughts exacerbate the hunger issue. In many parts of the world, particularly in some countries in Southeast Asia and Africa, which are forced to deal with floods and droughts annually, they face reduced opportunities for agricultural development. These disasters lead to crop losses, and farmers must endure and prepare for the next agricultural cycle. Consequently, many citizens in these regions lack sufficient food for sustenance. On the other hand, the absence of modern farming technologies also contributes to the global hunger problem. In many countries, particularly those that are underdeveloped, farmers cannot afford to access advanced machinery. Due to limited financial resources, they revert to outdated methods with inadequate agricultural infrastructure.

To address these issues, several actions can be taken. First, we must ensure that the public has access to sufficient food. This can be accomplished by making investments in infrastructure; examples include transportation networks, storage facilities, and roads in developing nations. Furthermore, addressing economic inequality is crucial. Governments should implement policies that promote educational methods, create jobs, and provide fair wages. Finally, another way to tackle the hunger problem is to expand international cooperation, which will reduce the geographical distance.

In light of the above, it is reasonable to conclude that natural disasters and the lack of modern farming technologies contribute to increasing world hunger. We can make efforts to enhance food security, address economic inequalities, and expand international cooperation in order to eliminate hunger.