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Nowadays public transport prices are constantly increasing. Why do you think this is happening? How can this problem be solved?

Nowadays public transport prices are constantly increasing. Why do you think this is happening? How can this problem be solved?

In the contemporary world , the expenses for public transportation are experiencing a significant increase . This essay will shed light on some compelling reasons and also suggest solutions to tackle this issue.

To begin with , it is obvious that we need a large amount of finance for maintenance in order to fix technical errors , upgrade infrastructure and mass transit’s functions . After a long time of using them under extreme weather , there may be minor errors or even huge ones . Therefore , regular checking and timely fixing are essential to ensure passengers’ safety which also leads to the rise in people’s reliance. Additionally , the increase in materials considerably contributes to higher public transports’ payments. This is mainly because we have suffered from the crisis of Covid-19 pandemic , which casted a shadow on global economics ,also made any goods become pricey and scarce , including fuel , petrol and gas . For instance ,buses go back and forth from their bus stations , refilling fuel twice or three a day is necessary .And for sure , its expenditure is not reasonable at all . As a result , there have been lots of factors out there that impact public transport prices.

Nonetheless, a radical remedy should come from the government's support . Investing more national budget on mass transit systems and reducing imposed taxes contribute to that higher successful remedy .Government can consider cutting down taxes for the imports of petrol overseas .Besides , politicians and entrepreneurs should promote the introduction and use of green public transportations , involving eco-friendly electric vehicles .For example , CEO. Pham Nhat Vuong , who is a successful man with widespread chains of business around Viet Nam , catches up with the trend of using electric buses , cars and motorbikes .Consequently , these ways foster the reduction on public transport expenses as well as people are persuaded to leave their cars at home that results in gas emissions limitation.

In conclusion , the growth of mass transit costs come from countless elements ,perhaps, maintenance fees, taxes . To tackle efficiently , we need the contributions of government and reputable individuals .


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

  1. "In the contemporary world" -> "In the modern world"
    Explanation: "Contemporary" can be replaced with "modern" to simplify the phrase while maintaining an academic tone, as "contemporary" might imply a slightly more specific or dated context.

  2. "expenses for public transportation are experiencing a significant increase" -> "public transportation costs are rising significantly"
    Explanation: "Expenses for public transportation" is redundant; "public transportation costs" is more concise and direct. "Are experiencing a significant increase" can be simplified to "are rising significantly" for a more straightforward expression.

  3. "shed light on some compelling reasons" -> "explore some compelling reasons"
    Explanation: "Shed light on" is a metaphorical expression that might be considered too informal for academic writing. "Explore" is a more direct and formal verb choice.

  4. "it is obvious that" -> "it is clear that"
    Explanation: "It is obvious that" can be simplified to "it is clear that" for a more formal tone.

  5. "a large amount of finance" -> "substantial funding"
    Explanation: "A large amount of finance" is awkward and vague; "substantial funding" is more precise and commonly used in formal contexts.

  6. "After a long time of using them under extreme weather" -> "After prolonged use under extreme weather conditions"
    Explanation: "After a long time of using them" is informal and vague; "After prolonged use under extreme weather conditions" is more precise and formal.

  7. "minor errors or even huge ones" -> "minor or significant errors"
    Explanation: "Huge ones" is informal and imprecise; "significant" is more appropriate for academic writing.

  8. "the increase in materials considerably contributes to higher public transports’ payments" -> "the increased cost of materials significantly contributes to higher public transportation costs"
    Explanation: "The increase in materials" is vague; "the increased cost of materials" is more specific. Also, "public transports’ payments" should be "public transportation costs" for grammatical correctness and clarity.

  9. "we have suffered from the crisis of Covid-19 pandemic" -> "the Covid-19 pandemic has affected global economies"
    Explanation: "We have suffered from" is too personal and informal; "the Covid-19 pandemic has affected" is more objective and formal.

  10. "casted a shadow on global economics" -> "affected global economies"
    Explanation: "Casted a shadow on" is an idiom that is too informal for academic writing; "affected" is straightforward and appropriate.

  11. "including fuel, petrol and gas" -> "including fuel, petrol, and gas"
    Explanation: Adding a comma after "fuel" improves readability and grammatical correctness.

  12. "its expenditure is not reasonable at all" -> "its expenditure is unreasonable"
    Explanation: "Not reasonable at all" is redundant; "unreasonable" is sufficient and more concise.

  13. "a radical remedy should come from the government’s support" -> "a comprehensive solution should come from government support"
    Explanation: "Radical remedy" might imply a drastic or extreme measure, which could be misleading; "comprehensive solution" is more neutral and formal.

  14. "Investing more national budget on mass transit systems" -> "Investing more national budget in mass transit systems"
    Explanation: "On" is incorrect; "in" is the correct preposition for indicating investment in something.

  15. "reducing imposed taxes" -> "reducing taxes"
    Explanation: "Imposed taxes" is redundant; "taxes" alone is sufficient and clearer.

  16. "green public transportations" -> "green public transportation"
    Explanation: "Transportations" is incorrect; "transportation" is the correct noun form.

  17. "involving eco-friendly electric vehicles" -> "including eco-friendly electric vehicles"
    Explanation: "Involving" is not the correct preposition; "including" is the appropriate choice for listing items.

  18. "Consequently, these ways foster the reduction on public transport expenses" -> "Consequently, these measures reduce public transportation costs"
    Explanation: "These ways foster the reduction on public transport expenses" is awkward and grammatically incorrect; "these measures reduce public transportation costs" is clearer and grammatically correct.

  19. "people are persuaded to leave their cars at home" -> "people are encouraged to leave their cars at home"
    Explanation: "Persuaded" implies coercion, which is not the intended meaning; "encouraged" is more appropriate and neutral.

  20. "the growth of mass transit costs come from countless elements" -> "the growth of mass transit costs stems from numerous factors"
    Explanation: "Come from" is incorrect; "stems from" is the correct phrase for indicating origin. Also, "countless elements" is vague; "numerous factors

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Task Response: 7

  • Answer All Parts of the Question:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both parts of the prompt by discussing reasons for the increase in public transport prices and suggesting potential solutions. The author identifies maintenance costs and the economic impact of the COVID-19 pandemic as key reasons for rising prices. However, the explanation of these reasons could be more detailed. For instance, while the mention of maintenance is relevant, it lacks specific examples or data to illustrate the extent of the financial burden. The solutions proposed, such as government investment and the promotion of green transport, are relevant but could benefit from further elaboration on how these measures would directly impact prices.
    • How to improve: To improve, the essay should provide more specific examples or statistics to support the reasons given. For instance, discussing the percentage increase in maintenance costs or providing data on fuel price fluctuations would strengthen the argument. Additionally, elaborating on how government investment could be allocated or what specific policies could be implemented would enhance the response.
  • Present a Clear Position Throughout:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position that rising public transport prices are a multifaceted issue requiring government intervention. However, the clarity of this position could be improved. In some instances, the phrasing is somewhat convoluted, which may confuse the reader. For example, the phrase "the rise in people’s reliance" is vague and does not clearly connect to the argument about maintenance costs.
    • How to improve: To enhance clarity, the author should use straightforward language and ensure that each point directly supports the overall argument. Clear topic sentences for each paragraph would help guide the reader through the essay and reinforce the main position.
  • Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents several ideas regarding the causes of rising public transport prices and potential solutions. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, while the author mentions the importance of government support, there is little elaboration on how this support could be structured or what specific outcomes could be expected from such investments. Additionally, the example of CEO Pham Nhat Vuong, while relevant, is not fully integrated into the argument, leaving the reader wanting more context.
    • How to improve: To improve the presentation and support of ideas, the author should aim to provide more detailed explanations and examples. Each point should be fully developed, with clear connections made between the ideas presented and the overall argument. Including more varied examples or case studies could also enhance the depth of the discussion.
  • Stay on Topic:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the reasons for and solutions to rising public transport prices. However, there are moments where the discussion veers slightly off-course, such as the mention of "gas emissions limitation," which, while relevant to the broader context of public transport, does not directly address the core issue of pricing.
    • How to improve: To maintain focus, the author should ensure that every point made is directly relevant to the prompt. It may be helpful to periodically refer back to the question throughout the essay to ensure that the discussion remains aligned with the task requirements. Additionally, avoiding tangential points will help keep the essay concise and on-topic.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents relevant ideas, there is room for improvement in the depth of analysis, clarity of expression, and focus on the prompt.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

  • Organize Information Logically:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure, beginning with an introduction that outlines the topic and the writer’s intent. The body paragraphs follow a logical progression, starting with reasons for the increase in public transport prices and then transitioning to potential solutions. However, the connection between ideas could be stronger. For instance, the transition from discussing maintenance costs to the impact of the Covid-19 pandemic feels abrupt and could benefit from a clearer link.
    • How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using transitional phrases that explicitly connect ideas. For example, after discussing maintenance, you could introduce the pandemic’s impact with a phrase like, "In addition to maintenance costs, external factors such as the Covid-19 pandemic have also played a significant role." This would create a smoother transition and reinforce the relationship between points.
  • Use Paragraphs:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct aspect of the topic. The first paragraph addresses the reasons for increased costs, while the second discusses potential solutions. However, the paragraphs could be more balanced in length and depth. The first paragraph is quite lengthy and covers multiple points, which may overwhelm the reader.
    • How to improve: Aim for more balanced paragraphs by ensuring each one contains a single main idea supported by adequate detail. Consider breaking the first paragraph into two: one focusing on maintenance and the other on the economic impact of the pandemic. This would make the essay easier to digest and improve clarity.
  • Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay employs some cohesive devices, such as "To begin with," "Additionally," and "Nonetheless," which help guide the reader through the argument. However, the range of cohesive devices is somewhat limited, and some sentences feel disjointed. For instance, the phrase "As a result" is used, but it could be more effectively integrated with preceding ideas to clarify the cause-and-effect relationship.
    • How to improve: Diversify the use of cohesive devices by incorporating a wider variety of linking words and phrases. For example, instead of repeating "Additionally," you could use "Furthermore" or "Moreover" to introduce new points. Additionally, ensure that cohesive devices are used to clarify relationships between sentences and ideas, such as using "This means that" to explain the implications of rising costs more clearly.

By addressing these areas, the essay can achieve a higher level of coherence and cohesion, ultimately leading to an improved band score.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

  • Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, with terms like "contemporary," "expenditures," "maintenance," and "eco-friendly." However, the vocabulary is somewhat repetitive, particularly with phrases like "public transport" and "increase." The use of synonyms or varied expressions could enhance the essay’s lexical richness.
    • How to improve: To improve, consider incorporating synonyms or related terms. For example, instead of repeatedly using "public transport," you could use "mass transit," "public transportation systems," or "commuting options." Additionally, using more varied adjectives and adverbs could help convey nuances in meaning.
  • Use Vocabulary Precisely:

    • Detailed explanation: While the essay generally uses vocabulary correctly, there are instances of imprecise usage. For example, the phrase "cast a shadow on global economics" is somewhat vague and could be more specific. The term "expenditure" is used correctly, but the phrase "its expenditure is not reasonable at all" could be clearer.
    • How to improve: Aim for more precise language by clarifying vague phrases. Instead of "cast a shadow," you might say "negatively impacted" or "led to economic downturns." Additionally, instead of "its expenditure is not reasonable," you could specify which expenditure you are referring to and why it is unreasonable, such as "the rising costs of fuel are unsustainable for public transport operators."
  • Use Correct Spelling:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains several spelling errors, such as "casted" (should be "cast") and "transportations" (should be "transport"). These errors detract from the overall professionalism of the writing and can lead to misunderstandings.
    • How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, consider implementing a proofreading strategy. After writing, take a break and then review the essay with fresh eyes, focusing specifically on spelling. Additionally, using spell-check tools or apps can help catch errors before submission. Regular practice with vocabulary lists can also reinforce correct spelling.

By addressing these areas—expanding vocabulary range, improving precision in word choice, and ensuring correct spelling—the essay could potentially achieve a higher band score in the Lexical Resource criterion.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

  • Use a Wide Range of Structures:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good variety of sentence structures, including complex sentences such as "To begin with, it is obvious that we need a large amount of finance for maintenance in order to fix technical errors, upgrade infrastructure and mass transit’s functions." However, there are instances of repetitive structures, particularly in the use of "there may be" and "there have been," which could limit the overall variety. Additionally, some sentences are overly long and could benefit from being broken down for clarity.
    • How to improve: To enhance the variety of sentence structures, consider incorporating more compound and complex sentences with varied conjunctions. For example, instead of repeatedly using "there may be," try rephrasing to "it is possible that minor errors arise" or "significant issues can occur." Additionally, practice using a mix of shorter and longer sentences to create a more dynamic flow.
  • Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues. For instance, "casted a shadow on global economics" should be "cast a shadow on global economics," as "casted" is not the correct past tense of "cast." Furthermore, there are punctuation errors, such as the lack of a comma before "also" in "which casted a shadow on global economics, also made any goods become pricey and scarce." Additionally, the phrase "buses go back and forth from their bus stations, refilling fuel twice or three a day is necessary" is a run-on sentence that lacks proper conjunction or punctuation.
    • How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, review the rules for verb tenses and ensure that the correct forms are used. Additionally, focus on punctuation, particularly the use of commas to separate clauses and avoid run-on sentences. Breaking down longer sentences into shorter, clearer ones can also help improve readability. Consider revising sentences for clarity and correctness, such as changing "buses go back and forth from their bus stations, refilling fuel twice or three a day is necessary" to "Buses must refill fuel two or three times a day, which is necessary for their operation."

By addressing these areas, the essay can achieve a higher band score in Grammatical Range and Accuracy.

Bài sửa mẫu

In the modern world, the expenses for public transportation are experiencing a significant increase. This essay will explore some compelling reasons for this trend and also suggest solutions to tackle the issue.

To begin with, it is clear that we require substantial funding for maintenance in order to fix technical errors, upgrade infrastructure, and enhance mass transit functions. After prolonged use under extreme weather conditions, there may be minor or significant errors that need addressing. Therefore, regular inspections and timely repairs are essential to ensure passengers’ safety, which also leads to an increase in people’s reliance on public transport. Additionally, the increased cost of materials significantly contributes to higher public transportation costs. This is mainly because we have suffered from the crisis of the Covid-19 pandemic, which has affected global economies and made many goods more expensive and scarce, including fuel, petrol, and gas. For instance, buses often need to refill fuel two or three times a day while traveling back and forth from their stations. Clearly, this expenditure is unreasonable. As a result, there are numerous factors that impact public transport prices.

Nonetheless, a comprehensive solution should come from government support. Investing more of the national budget in mass transit systems and reducing taxes can significantly contribute to a successful remedy. The government can consider cutting taxes on imported petrol. Moreover, politicians and entrepreneurs should promote the introduction and use of green public transportation, including eco-friendly electric vehicles. For example, CEO Pham Nhat Vuong, a successful businessman with widespread chains in Vietnam, has embraced the trend of using electric buses, cars, and motorbikes. Consequently, these measures foster a reduction in public transportation expenses and encourage people to leave their cars at home, which helps limit gas emissions.

In conclusion, the growth of mass transit costs stems from numerous factors, including maintenance fees and taxes. To tackle this issue effectively, we need the contributions of both the government and reputable individuals.

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