Only government action can solve housing shortages in big cities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, it is commonplace for many countries to face up with rampant inadequate housing. Whether or not this issue could be solely addressed by the intervention of the government is still a highly heated topic. I wholeheartedly agree with this assertion, as authorities can resolve this problem by various initiatives such as establishing more public housing and gradually expanding the city.
First and foremost, government-subsidized housing is the core of a strategy to solve this immediate conundrum. As a result, many labor and homeless populations will be accommodated in a reasonable house which seems to be impossible for them to buy in the past. For example, in E, after being severely damaged by WW 2, the Britain authority published a supportive programme in which the cost of accommodations was subsidized 100%, which considerably contributed to the dramatic resurgence of economy and society.
Furthermore, the government can improve the situation by enlarging the cities and building more houses outside the city. This will mitigate the housing shortage in the city by encouraging waves of immigration to the outskirts.For instance, in Noida, a rapidly expanding metropolis in India, the housing development department has continuously built more residential properties in the outskirts, and constructed metros and highways for commuters to make the city accessible. Thus, this assisted in reducing the locals' mounting housing and cramming issues.
In conclusion,I am in favor of the statement that the starring role on alleviating the housing crisis is laid on the hand of governmental agencies.Additionally Our city leaders and planners have to take measures to look for optimum solutions and make the right decision.
Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng
Errors and Improvements:
"face up with rampant inadequate housing" -> "confront widespread housing inadequacy"
Explanation: The phrase "face up with rampant inadequate housing" is awkward and lacks precision. "Confronting widespread housing inadequacy" maintains formality and clarity while using more appropriate vocabulary.
"Whether or not this issue could be solely addressed" -> "The extent to which this issue can be exclusively addressed"
Explanation: The original phrase is wordy and lacks precision. The suggested alternative is more concise and formal, using "the extent to which" for clarity and maintaining an academic tone.
"highly heated topic" -> "a contentious issue"
Explanation: "Highly heated topic" is colloquial, and "contentious issue" is a more formal and suitable alternative that aligns with academic style.
"I wholeheartedly agree with this assertion" -> "I strongly endorse this proposition"
Explanation: "Wholeheartedly agree" is somewhat informal. "Strongly endorse this proposition" provides a more formal and sophisticated expression of agreement.
"establishing more public housing" -> "implementing an extensive public housing initiative"
Explanation: "Establishing more public housing" is relatively simplistic. "Implementing an extensive public housing initiative" is more precise and aligns with academic language standards.
"First and foremost" -> "Primarily"
Explanation: "First and foremost" is a bit informal. "Primarily" is a more formal transition that maintains the flow of the text.
"core of a strategy" -> "central element of a strategy"
Explanation: "Core of a strategy" can be refined for formality. "Central element of a strategy" provides a more sophisticated expression.
"immediate conundrum" -> "immediate challenge"
Explanation: While "conundrum" is not incorrect, "immediate challenge" is more straightforward and academically appropriate.
"accommodated in a reasonable house" -> "accommodated in affordable housing"
Explanation: "Reasonable house" may sound subjective. "Affordable housing" is a more objective and formal term.
"seems to be impossible for them to buy in the past" -> "previously appeared unattainable for them to purchase"
Explanation: "Seems to be impossible" lacks precision. "Previously appeared unattainable for them to purchase" provides a more accurate and formal expression.
These adjustments aim to enhance the overall academic tone and clarity of the essay without introducing unnecessary complexity.
Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7
Band Score: 7.0
- Quoted text: "Nowadays, it is commonplace for many countries to face up with rampant inadequate housing. Whether or not this issue could be solely addressed by the intervention of the government is still a highly heated topic. I wholeheartedly agree with this assertion, as authorities can resolve this problem by various initiatives such as establishing more public housing and gradually expanding the city."
Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 6
Band Score: 6.0
The essay demonstrates coherence and cohesion to a reasonable extent. The overall organization of ideas is clear, with a logical progression throughout the essay. Paragraphing is used, but there are instances where it could be more logically structured. The use of cohesive devices is generally effective, although there are some instances of faulty or mechanical cohesion, and there’s room for improvement in the balance of cohesive elements. The referencing and substitution within the essay are adequate but could benefit from more clarity. Overall, the essay exhibits a coherent structure and a logical flow of ideas, but there is room for refinement in cohesion and paragraphing.
How to improve:
Paragraph Structure: Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic and follows a logical sequence of ideas. Some paragraphs could be more focused on a specific aspect of the argument.
Cohesive Devices: While the essay uses cohesive devices, strive for a more varied and precise use of these elements. Avoid any mechanical or repetitive use. Ensure that cohesive devices contribute seamlessly to the flow of ideas.
Referencing and Substitution: Enhance the clarity of referencing and substitution. Make sure that pronouns and connecting words explicitly indicate the relationship between ideas. This will improve the overall coherence of the essay.
Consistent Logical Progression: Maintain a consistent logical progression within and between paragraphs. Ensure that the reader can easily follow the development of ideas without confusion or abrupt shifts.
By addressing these aspects, the essay can achieve a more cohesive and logically organized structure, potentially elevating the band score.
Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7
Band Score: 7.0
Explanation: The essay demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary, allowing for flexibility and precision in expression. The writer uses less common lexical items with some awareness of style and collocation. Examples include "rampant inadequate housing," "intervention of the government," and "dramatic resurgence of economy and society." While there are occasional errors in word choice and collocation, such as "face up with" (face) and "supportive programme" (support program), these do not significantly impede communication. The essay effectively conveys the message and ideas, utilizing a mix of common and less common vocabulary.
How to improve: To enhance the lexical resource, the writer should focus on refining word choices and ensuring accurate collocation. It would be beneficial to avoid minor inaccuracies and slips in vocabulary usage. Additionally, a wider variety of vocabulary, especially in the introduction and conclusion, could contribute to a more sophisticated lexical range.
Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7
Band Score: 7.0
The essay demonstrates a good command of grammar and punctuation, incorporating a variety of complex structures. There is a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, contributing to overall sentence variety. While there are some grammatical errors and instances of awkward phrasing, they do not significantly impede communication. The essay effectively conveys the writer’s viewpoint through coherent and well-organized sentences.
How to improve:
To enhance the grammatical range and accuracy, the writer should focus on refining sentence structures and ensuring the correct usage of tense throughout the essay. Additionally, careful proofreading can help eliminate minor errors and enhance the overall fluency of the text. Consider revising awkward phrasing for smoother expression of ideas.
Bài sửa mẫu
In today’s world, numerous nations grapple with the pervasive challenge of inadequate housing. The question of whether government intervention alone can effectively address this issue remains a highly debated topic. I wholeheartedly support the view that governmental actions are pivotal in resolving this predicament, primarily through initiatives such as the creation of more public housing and the gradual expansion of cities.
First and foremost, government-subsidized housing stands out as a key element in tackling this pressing issue. By doing so, many in the workforce and homeless populations can find accommodation in homes that were previously beyond their financial reach. A compelling example is found in the post-World War II era in Britain. In the aftermath of severe damage, the British government implemented a supportive program that fully subsidized the cost of accommodations. This measure significantly contributed to the remarkable revival of the economy and society.
Furthermore, the government can enhance the situation by expanding urban areas and constructing additional houses on the outskirts. This approach can alleviate housing shortages in the city by encouraging people to migrate to the suburbs. A case in point is Noida, a rapidly growing metropolis in India, where the housing development department has consistently built more residential properties on the outskirts. Additionally, they have developed transportation infrastructure like metros and highways to make the city easily accessible. This concerted effort has played a vital role in reducing local housing problems and congestion.
In conclusion, I strongly agree with the assertion that the primary responsibility for alleviating the housing crisis lies with governmental agencies. Our city leaders and planners must implement measures to explore optimal solutions and make well-informed decisions.