Some cities have vehicle-free days when private cars, trucks, and motorcycles are banned from the city center. The only vehicles permitted in the city center are bicycles, buses, and taxis. Do you think the benefits of vehicle-free days in cities outweigh the disadvantages?

In the present age, the use of private vehicles such as cars, trucks, and motorcycles has increased significantly. Therefore, some cities have implemented vehicle-free days, allowing only bicycles, buses, and taxis in the city center. While this development may bring about some drawbacks, I would argue that they are eclipsed by the benefits.

To commence with, there are certain inconveniences when prohibiting private vehicles from the city center. Firstly, banning cars, trucks, and other personal vehicles leads to significant inconvenience. For instance, many workers who live in areas with limited public transportation options have to go to work early. Consequently, they find it challenging to travel since the cost of taxis is expensive. Moreover, a number of products and packages need to be transferred from place to place by large vehicles like trucks or lorries. Therefore, banning them can result in late deliveries to consumers not only nationally but also internationally, which can severely impact the country’s economy and development.

In spite of the disadvantages mentioned above, I am of the opinion that the aforementioned disadvantages are outweighed by greater benefits. To be more specific, the method of having vehicle-free days is an effective way to reduce the emissions from private vehicles into the atmosphere. Most cities have witnessed a dramatic increase in the use of personal transport in recent years. These vehicles release pollutants into the air, contributing to poor air quality. As a result, those cities have to suffer from severe environmental pollution, leading to some issues such as respiratory problems and other health concerns related to air pollution. Additionally, using local means of transport also encourages citizens to exercise as they could ride a bike to work. Furthermore, they could save a substantial amount of money on fuel or gas used for private transport.

In conclusion, it seems to me that the advantages of vehicle-free day are more considerable than its disadvantages.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"In the present age" -> "In contemporary times"
Explanation: "In contemporary times" is a more formal and precise phrase that enhances the academic tone of the essay, replacing the somewhat vague "In the present age."
"has increased significantly" -> "has significantly increased"
Explanation: Moving "significantly" to the end of the phrase improves the grammatical structure and aligns with formal academic style.
"allowing only bicycles, buses, and taxis" -> "permitting only bicycles, buses, and taxis"
Explanation: "Permitting" is a more formal synonym for "allowing," which is more suitable for academic writing.
"To commence with" -> "To begin with"
Explanation: "To begin with" is a more standard transitional phrase in formal academic writing compared to "To commence with."
"leads to significant inconvenience" -> "results in significant inconvenience"
Explanation: "Results in" is a more precise and formal way to express causality than "leads to."
"the cost of taxis is expensive" -> "the cost of taxis is high"
Explanation: "High" is a more neutral and academically appropriate term than "expensive," which can sound colloquial.
"a number of products and packages need to be transferred" -> "numerous products and packages require transfer"
Explanation: "Numerous" and "require" are more precise and formal, improving the academic tone.
"can result in late deliveries" -> "may lead to delayed deliveries"
Explanation: "May lead to delayed deliveries" is more specific and formal, enhancing the precision of the statement.
"which can severely impact" -> "which could significantly affect"
Explanation: "Could significantly affect" is a more measured and formal expression than "can severely impact."
"I am of the opinion that" -> "I believe that"
Explanation: "I believe that" is a more direct and formal way to express personal opinion in academic writing.
"the method of having vehicle-free days" -> "the strategy of implementing vehicle-free days"
Explanation: "Strategy" is a more precise and formal term than "method," and "implementing" is more specific than "having."
"release pollutants into the air" -> "emit pollutants into the atmosphere"
Explanation: "Emit" is a more technical term than "release," and "atmosphere" is more precise than "air" in this context.
"those cities have to suffer from" -> "these cities experience"
Explanation: "Experience" is a more neutral and formal way to describe the impact of environmental issues, avoiding the emotional connotation of "suffer from."
"encourages citizens to exercise" -> "promotes physical activity among citizens"
Explanation: "Promotes physical activity among citizens" is a more formal and specific phrase than "encourages citizens to exercise."
"could ride a bike to work" -> "may cycle to work"
Explanation: "May cycle to work" is a more formal and precise expression than "could ride a bike to work."
"save a substantial amount of money" -> "save a considerable amount of money"
Explanation: "Considerable" is a more formal synonym for "substantial," aligning better with academic style.

These changes enhance the formality, precision, and clarity of the essay, making it more suitable for an academic context.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of vehicle-free days in cities. The introduction clearly states the writer’s position that benefits outweigh the drawbacks. The first body paragraph outlines the inconveniences caused by the ban on private vehicles, while the second body paragraph presents the benefits, such as reduced emissions and improved public health. However, the discussion of disadvantages could be more balanced with a deeper exploration of the potential negative impacts on the economy and daily life.
- How to improve: To enhance the response, the writer could provide more examples or statistics to illustrate the disadvantages, making the argument more robust. Additionally, discussing potential solutions or compromises (e.g., improved public transport options) could provide a more comprehensive view of the issue.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position throughout, consistently arguing that the benefits of vehicle-free days outweigh the disadvantages. The use of phrases like "I would argue" and "I am of the opinion" reinforces the writer’s stance. However, the transition between discussing disadvantages and advantages could be smoother to enhance coherence.
- How to improve: The writer could use transitional phrases to better connect the discussion of disadvantages to the subsequent advantages. For example, after outlining the inconveniences, a phrase like "Despite these challenges, the benefits are significant" could improve the flow and clarity of the argument.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents and supports ideas well, particularly in the second body paragraph, where the benefits of vehicle-free days are elaborated upon with specific examples, such as improved air quality and health benefits. However, the support for the disadvantages is less developed, which weakens the overall argument.
- How to improve: To strengthen the essay, the writer should aim to provide more detailed examples and explanations for the disadvantages. This could include discussing specific scenarios where businesses are affected or citing studies that show the impact of vehicle bans on local economies.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the implications of vehicle-free days in urban settings. However, there are moments where the discussion could be more tightly aligned with the prompt. For instance, the mention of "late deliveries to consumers not only nationally but also internationally" could be more focused on the local context of vehicle-free days.
- How to improve: The writer should ensure that all examples and arguments directly relate to the impact of vehicle-free days. Keeping the focus on local effects and the immediate context of the city center would enhance relevance and clarity.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong understanding of the topic and presents a well-structured argument. With some adjustments to the depth of analysis and coherence, it could achieve an even higher band score.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 8

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear argument structure, beginning with an introduction that outlines the topic and the writer’s stance. The body paragraphs are logically sequenced, with the first paragraph discussing the disadvantages of vehicle-free days and the second addressing the advantages. For example, the transition from discussing inconveniences to the benefits of reduced emissions is smooth, maintaining a logical progression of ideas. However, the essay could benefit from a more explicit linking of the disadvantages to the overall argument, perhaps by summarizing their impact on the city’s functionality before transitioning to the benefits.
- How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using transitional phrases that explicitly connect the disadvantages to the advantages. For instance, after discussing the inconveniences, a phrase like "Despite these challenges, the overall impact of vehicle-free days can lead to significant improvements in urban living" could serve as a bridge to the next paragraph.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct aspect of the argument. The introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion are clearly delineated. However, the first body paragraph could be further divided to separate the discussion of inconveniences from the examples provided, which would enhance clarity and readability.
- How to improve: Consider breaking the first body paragraph into two separate paragraphs: one focusing solely on the inconveniences of banning private vehicles and another dedicated to the examples that illustrate these points. This would allow for a more detailed exploration of each inconvenience and improve the overall clarity of the argument.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good use of cohesive devices, such as "Firstly," "Moreover," and "In spite of," which help to guide the reader through the argument. The use of these devices contributes to the overall coherence of the essay. However, the range of cohesive devices could be expanded to include more varied connectors and referencing techniques, which would enhance the sophistication of the writing.
- How to improve: To diversify cohesive devices, consider incorporating a wider range of linking words and phrases such as "On the other hand," "In addition," and "Consequently." Additionally, using pronouns and synonyms to refer back to previously mentioned ideas can help avoid repetition and create a smoother flow. For example, instead of repeating "private vehicles," you could use "these vehicles" or "such transport" in subsequent references.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong command of coherence and cohesion, with clear organization and effective use of paragraphs and cohesive devices. By implementing the suggested improvements, the writer can further enhance the clarity and sophistication of their argument.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, with terms such as "inconveniences," "pollutants," and "respiratory problems." However, the vocabulary used is somewhat repetitive, particularly in the discussion of vehicle types (e.g., "private vehicles," "cars," "trucks," "motorcycles"). This limits the overall lexical variety and richness of the essay.
- How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, the writer could incorporate synonyms or related terms. For instance, instead of repeatedly using "private vehicles," alternatives like "personal transport," "individual automobiles," or "motorized transport" could be employed. Additionally, introducing more varied expressions to describe benefits and drawbacks would enrich the essay.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally uses vocabulary correctly, but there are instances of imprecise usage. For example, the phrase "the aforementioned disadvantages are outweighed by greater benefits" could be more effectively expressed as "the benefits significantly outweigh the disadvantages." This would clarify the writer’s stance and enhance the precision of the argument.
- How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should focus on using vocabulary that directly conveys their intended meaning. This can be achieved by revising sentences for clarity and ensuring that word choices accurately reflect the argument being made. Practicing paraphrasing and seeking feedback on word choices can also help in this area.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay displays a good level of spelling accuracy, with no significant errors noted. Words such as "convenience," "transportation," and "environmental" are spelled correctly, which contributes positively to the overall impression of the essay.
- How to improve: To maintain and further improve spelling accuracy, the writer should continue to proofread their work carefully. Utilizing spell-check tools and engaging in regular reading can also help reinforce correct spelling practices. Additionally, focusing on commonly misspelled words in the context of academic writing can be beneficial.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a coherent argument, enhancing vocabulary range, precision, and maintaining spelling accuracy will contribute to achieving a higher band score in the Lexical Resource criterion.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good variety of sentence structures, including simple, compound, and complex sentences. For example, the use of complex sentences is evident in phrases like "In spite of the disadvantages mentioned above, I am of the opinion that the aforementioned disadvantages are outweighed by greater benefits." This showcases the ability to connect ideas and present nuanced arguments. However, there are instances of repetitive sentence beginnings and structures, such as starting multiple sentences with "Firstly," "Moreover," and "Additionally," which can detract from the overall variety.
- How to improve: To enhance the diversity of sentence structures, the writer could incorporate more varied sentence openings and use different conjunctions or transitional phrases. For instance, instead of repeatedly using "Firstly" and "Moreover," the writer could use alternatives like "To begin with," "In addition," or "Furthermore." Additionally, varying the length and complexity of sentences can create a more engaging and dynamic writing style.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: Overall, the essay displays a strong command of grammar and punctuation, with only a few minor errors. For instance, in the phrase "they find it challenging to travel since the cost of taxis is expensive," the use of "to travel since" could be improved for clarity; a more precise phrasing might be "to travel, especially since the cost of taxis can be expensive." Furthermore, there is a slight inconsistency in pluralization, as seen in "the advantages of vehicle-free day are more considerable than its disadvantages," where "day" should be pluralized to "days" to match the context.
- How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles. Regular practice with grammar exercises focusing on common pitfalls, such as pluralization and sentence clarity, can also be beneficial. Additionally, proofreading the essay for punctuation errors, such as ensuring commas are used correctly to separate clauses, will enhance overall clarity and professionalism.

By addressing these areas for improvement, the writer can work towards achieving a higher band score in Grammatical Range and Accuracy in future IELTS essays.

Bài sửa mẫu

In contemporary times, the use of private vehicles such as cars, trucks, and motorcycles has significantly increased. Therefore, some cities have implemented vehicle-free days, permitting only bicycles, buses, and taxis in the city center. While this development may bring about some drawbacks, I would argue that they are eclipsed by the benefits.

To begin with, there are certain inconveniences when prohibiting private vehicles from the city center. Firstly, banning cars, trucks, and other personal vehicles results in significant inconvenience. For instance, many workers who live in areas with limited public transportation options have to go to work early. Consequently, they find it challenging to travel since the cost of taxis is high. Moreover, numerous products and packages require transfer from place to place by large vehicles like trucks or lorries. Therefore, banning them may lead to delayed deliveries to consumers not only nationally but also internationally, which could significantly affect the country’s economy and development.

In spite of the disadvantages mentioned above, I believe that the aforementioned disadvantages are outweighed by greater benefits. To be more specific, the strategy of implementing vehicle-free days is an effective way to reduce the emissions from private vehicles into the atmosphere. Most cities have experienced a dramatic increase in the use of personal transport in recent years. These vehicles emit pollutants into the air, contributing to poor air quality. As a result, these cities experience severe environmental pollution, leading to issues such as respiratory problems and other health concerns related to air pollution. Additionally, using local means of transport also promotes physical activity among citizens, as they may cycle to work. Furthermore, they could save a considerable amount of money on fuel or gas used for private transport.

In conclusion, it seems to me that the advantages of vehicle-free days are more considerable than their disadvantages.