Some companies and organizations require their employees to wear uniforms. What are the advantages and disadvantages of wearing a uniform?

Many people believe that businesses should reiqure their workforce to wear uniforms. This essay attempts to shed light on both the merits and demerits of this stragedy before concluding that the former is more significant.

On the one hand, the option to equip uniform for employees is disadvantageous in some extent. To start with, resources of manufacturing these uniforms would be remarkable. This is because they would be the face of their businesses, which would decide the cultures and customs of them in the future, so they would have to seriously and carefully deal with this problem, which would be spend much time and money to design and produce. Secondly, these clothes might be unsuitable and uncomfortable for everyone. Because people have different features, such as hight, weight and skin colours, they could show an ugly appearance with these outfit or the quatity of them might cause some irritation.

On the other hand, there are a host of compelling reasons as to why I am convinced that having uniforms for employees is better. One reason is that wearing uniforms could help easier manage employees. By these special outfits, manager could decide roles of that members, such as doctors or nurses, which could lead to higher efficiency and more profits in the future. Another reason, not as profound, is that this option could save time and money for employees. Due to constant uniforms, they would not only have to spend time to choose which clothes should wear but also save the expenditure for these clothes, so the employees would save a remarkable funding and not be envious and embarrased by gorgeous and expensive clothes of their college.

In conclusion, while it is irrefutable that uniforms could have some downsides, such as high cost and may be the unrelaxing feeling of employees, I would contend that they would be the problem in the shor-term and the upsides which it offers are significantly more notable, as unimaginative revenue and having weel facing.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"reiqure" -> "require"
Explanation: Correcting the spelling error from "reiqure" to "require" ensures the proper use of the word in formal writing.
"stragedy" -> "strategy"
Explanation: The word "stragedy" is a misspelling of "strategy," which is a crucial term in the context of business and decision-making, making it essential to correct for clarity and professionalism.
"equip uniform for employees" -> "require employees to wear uniforms"
Explanation: The phrase "equip uniform for employees" is awkward and unclear. The suggested revision clarifies that the requirement is for employees to wear uniforms, which is the intended meaning.
"resources of manufacturing" -> "resources for manufacturing"
Explanation: The preposition "of" is incorrectly used here. The correct preposition "for" is necessary to indicate the purpose of the resources, which is to manufacture uniforms.
"remarkable" -> "significant"
Explanation: "Remarkable" can imply something extraordinary or noteworthy, which may not be the intended meaning in this context. "Significant" is more neutral and appropriate for describing the extent of resources needed.
"would be the face of their businesses" -> "would represent their businesses"
Explanation: The phrase "would be the face of their businesses" is metaphorical and somewhat unclear. "Would represent their businesses" is more direct and clear, maintaining the intended meaning of uniforms as a visual representation of the company.
"would have to seriously and carefully deal with this problem" -> "would need to carefully address this issue"
Explanation: "Deal with" is somewhat informal and vague; "address" is more precise and formal. Additionally, "problem" can be replaced with "issue" for a more academic tone.
"spend much time and money to design and produce" -> "invest considerable time and resources in designing and producing"
Explanation: "Spend much time and money" is informal and vague. "Invest considerable time and resources" is more formal and specific, fitting the academic style better.
"unsuitable and uncomfortable" -> "inconvenient and uncomfortable"
Explanation: "Unsuitable" is not typically used to describe clothing, whereas "inconvenient" is more appropriate for describing clothing that is difficult to wear or use.
"hight" -> "height"
Explanation: Correcting the spelling error from "hight" to "height" ensures the proper use of the word in formal writing.
"skin colours" -> "skin tones"
Explanation: "Skin colours" is not a standard term; "skin tones" is the correct and accepted terminology in formal and academic contexts.
"quetity" -> "quantity"
Explanation: Correcting the spelling error from "quetity" to "quantity" ensures the proper use of the word in formal writing.
"could help easier manage employees" -> "could facilitate easier management of employees"
Explanation: "Help easier manage" is grammatically incorrect and awkward. "Facilitate easier management" is grammatically correct and more formal.
"manager could decide roles of that members" -> "managers could determine the roles of their members"
Explanation: "Decide roles of that members" is grammatically incorrect and unclear. The suggested revision clarifies the subject and verb agreement, improving readability and formality.
"not as profound" -> "less significant"
Explanation: "Not as profound" is somewhat informal and vague. "Less significant" is more precise and appropriate for academic writing.
"save a remarkable funding" -> "save a significant amount of money"
Explanation: "Save a remarkable funding" is incorrect and unclear. "Save a significant amount of money" is grammatically correct and clearer.
"not be envious and embarrased" -> "not feel envious and embarrassed"
Explanation: "Not be envious and embarrased" is grammatically incorrect. "Not feel envious and embarrassed" corrects the verb tense and spelling, aligning with formal English usage.
"having weel facing" -> "having well-defined faces"
Explanation: "Having weel facing" is unclear and grammatically incorrect. "Having well-defined faces" corrects the spelling and clarifies the meaning, enhancing the sentence’s coherence and formality.

These changes aim to refine the vocabulary and grammar to meet the standards of academic writing, ensuring clarity, precision, and formality.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Task Response: 7

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of wearing uniforms, which is a key requirement of the prompt. The author provides a balanced view, discussing the disadvantages such as high manufacturing costs and discomfort, as well as advantages like improved management and cost savings for employees. However, the exploration of disadvantages is less detailed compared to the advantages, which could lead to a perception of imbalance.
- How to improve: To enhance the response, the author should aim to provide a more equal depth of analysis for both sides. This could involve elaborating on the disadvantages with specific examples or statistics, as well as discussing potential solutions to the issues raised.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay concludes with a clear position favoring the advantages of uniforms, stating that they are more significant. However, the transition from discussing disadvantages to advantages could be smoother, as the shift feels abrupt. The phrase "the former is more significant" lacks a strong lead-in that connects the two sides effectively.
- How to improve: To maintain a clear and consistent position, the author should use transitional phrases that link the discussion of disadvantages to the advantages more cohesively. For example, summarizing the disadvantages before stating the advantages could help reinforce the overall stance.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents several ideas, particularly in the advantages section, such as improved management and cost savings. However, the support for these ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the claim that uniforms help manage employees better lacks specific examples or evidence to substantiate it, making the argument less persuasive.
- How to improve: The author should aim to extend and support ideas with more concrete examples or data. For instance, citing studies or real-world examples of companies that have benefited from uniforms could strengthen the argument. Additionally, providing more detail on how uniforms can lead to higher efficiency would enhance the overall quality of the essay.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the advantages and disadvantages of uniforms. However, there are moments where the language becomes unclear, such as "the quatity of them might cause some irritation," which could confuse readers and detracts from the main argument.
- How to improve: To maintain focus and clarity, the author should ensure that all statements are directly relevant to the topic. Simplifying complex sentences and avoiding vague language will help keep the reader engaged and ensure that the main points are communicated effectively. Additionally, proofreading for spelling and grammatical errors would improve clarity and professionalism.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a good understanding of the task and presents relevant ideas, there are areas for improvement in depth of analysis, clarity of position, and supporting evidence that could elevate the score further.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure, beginning with an introduction that outlines the topic and the writer’s stance. The body paragraphs are divided into advantages and disadvantages, which helps in organizing the information logically. However, the transition between ideas could be smoother. For instance, the shift from discussing disadvantages to advantages could benefit from a clearer linking sentence that signals this transition.
- How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using transitional phrases such as "On the contrary" or "Conversely" when moving from one perspective to another. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that encapsulates the main idea of that paragraph.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate the discussion of advantages and disadvantages. Each paragraph contains multiple sentences that develop the main idea. However, some sentences within the paragraphs are overly long and convoluted, which can obscure the main point. For example, the first disadvantage paragraph could be broken down into clearer, more concise sentences.
- How to improve: Aim for clarity by breaking long sentences into shorter ones. Each paragraph should ideally contain a mix of short and long sentences to maintain reader engagement. Additionally, consider concluding each paragraph with a sentence that summarizes the main point discussed, reinforcing the argument made.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs some cohesive devices, such as "On the one hand" and "On the other hand," which effectively signal the structure of the argument. However, there is a limited range of cohesive devices used throughout the essay. For instance, the use of conjunctions and linking words could be more varied to improve the overall flow. Phrases like "Furthermore," "In addition," and "Moreover" could enhance the connection between ideas.
- How to improve: To diversify cohesive devices, practice incorporating a wider range of linking words and phrases. Additionally, ensure that cohesive devices are used appropriately to connect ideas within and between paragraphs. This will help in creating a smoother reading experience and enhancing the overall coherence of the essay.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a logical structure, improvements in sentence clarity, paragraph organization, and the use of cohesive devices will enhance coherence and cohesion, potentially raising the band score further.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a moderate range of vocabulary, with terms like "merits," "demerits," "disadvantageous," and "compelling reasons." However, the use of phrases such as "the face of their businesses" and "ugly appearance" lacks sophistication and variety. The phrase "having uniforms for employees is better" is quite simplistic and could be expressed in a more nuanced way.
- How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, the writer should incorporate more varied synonyms and expressions. For instance, instead of "ugly appearance," consider using "unflattering appearance" or "unappealing look." Additionally, using phrases like "the advantages outweigh the disadvantages" could provide a more formal tone.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: There are instances of imprecise vocabulary usage, such as "resources of manufacturing these uniforms would be remarkable," where "remarkable" is not the appropriate word choice. The term "stragedy" is a misspelling of "strategy," which affects clarity. The phrase "not be envious and embarrased by gorgeous and expensive clothes of their college" is confusing; "college" should likely be "colleagues," and the overall structure is awkward.
- How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should focus on context-appropriate vocabulary. For example, replace "remarkable" with "significant" or "considerable" when discussing resources. Additionally, proofreading for spelling errors and ensuring that words fit the context will enhance clarity.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several spelling errors, including "reiqure" (require), "stragedy" (strategy), "hight" (height), "quatity" (quantity), "unrelaxing" (uncomfortable), and "weel" (well). These errors detract from the overall professionalism of the writing and can confuse the reader.
- How to improve: To improve spelling accuracy, the writer should practice spelling common IELTS vocabulary and utilize tools such as spell checkers. Additionally, reading more extensively can help reinforce correct spelling through exposure. Regularly reviewing and proofreading written work before submission will also help catch errors.

In summary, while the essay shows a reasonable attempt at using vocabulary relevant to the topic, there are significant areas for improvement in range, precision, and spelling. Focusing on these aspects will help elevate the overall quality of the writing and potentially improve the Lexical Resource score in future assessments.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 5

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates some attempt to use a variety of sentence structures, such as simple, compound, and complex sentences. For example, the phrase "On the one hand, the option to equip uniform for employees is disadvantageous in some extent" shows an attempt at a complex structure. However, the overall range is limited, and many sentences are overly long and convoluted, which can hinder clarity. Additionally, phrases like "which could lead to higher efficiency and more profits in the future" are somewhat repetitive and could be varied more to enhance engagement.
- How to improve: To diversify sentence structures, the writer should practice using a mix of short, punchy sentences alongside longer, more complex ones. Incorporating more varied conjunctions and relative clauses can also help. For instance, instead of saying "this option could save time and money for employees," the writer could say, "Not only does this option save time for employees, but it also reduces their clothing expenses." This approach would create a more dynamic flow in the writing.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that detract from its overall clarity. For example, "reiqure" should be "require," and "stragedy" should be "strategy." There are also issues with subject-verb agreement, as seen in "manager could decide roles of that members," which should be "managers could decide the roles of those members." Additionally, punctuation is often missing or misused, such as in "which would decide the cultures and customs of them in the future," where a comma is needed before "which" to clarify the sentence structure.
- How to improve: To enhance grammatical accuracy, the writer should focus on proofreading their work for spelling errors and grammatical mistakes. Utilizing grammar-checking tools or seeking feedback from peers can also be beneficial. Practicing sentence construction and familiarizing oneself with common grammatical rules, such as subject-verb agreement and proper use of articles, will lead to improved accuracy. Additionally, reviewing punctuation rules, especially regarding the use of commas and conjunctions, will help clarify complex sentences.

Overall, while the essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear argument, significant improvements in grammatical range and accuracy are necessary to achieve a higher band score. Focusing on sentence variety and grammatical precision will enhance the overall quality of the writing.

Bài sửa mẫu

Many people believe that businesses should require their workforce to wear uniforms. This essay attempts to shed light on both the advantages and disadvantages of this strategy before concluding that the former is more significant.

On the one hand, the requirement for employees to wear uniforms has some disadvantages. To start with, the resources needed for manufacturing these uniforms can be considerable. This is because uniforms would represent their businesses and play a crucial role in shaping their cultures and customs in the future. Therefore, companies would need to carefully address this issue, which could involve investing considerable time and resources in designing and producing the uniforms. Secondly, these clothes might be inconvenient and uncomfortable for everyone. Since people have different features, such as height, weight, and skin tones, they could end up looking unappealing in these outfits, or the quantity of uniforms provided might cause some irritation.

On the other hand, there are several compelling reasons why I believe that having uniforms for employees is beneficial. One reason is that wearing uniforms could facilitate easier management of employees. With these special outfits, managers could determine the roles of their members, such as doctors or nurses, which could lead to higher efficiency and increased profits in the future. Another reason, although less significant, is that this option could save time and money for employees. With a standardized uniform, they would not only save time deciding what to wear but also reduce their expenditure on clothing. As a result, employees could save a significant amount of money and not feel envious or embarrassed by the expensive clothes of their colleagues.

In conclusion, while it is undeniable that uniforms may have some downsides, such as high costs and potential discomfort for employees, I contend that these issues are short-term. The advantages they offer, such as improved management and financial savings for employees, are significantly more notable.