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Some people believe that eventually all jobs will be done by artificailly intelligent robots. What is your opinion? Give reasons for your answe and inlcude any relevant examples from your own knowledge of experience.

Some people believe that eventually all jobs will be done by artificailly intelligent robots. What is your opinion?
Give reasons for your answe and inlcude any relevant examples from your own knowledge of experience.

In our comtemporary society, it is obvious that artificial intellegient play the key role in the development of most of fields of society, hence, there is a thought that, in the future, human being will be replaced by innovative techonoly like automatic robots. In my opinion, it is not practical to some certain exent. In this essay, i will discover the reasons why robots never take over all jobs.
It is true that humans never are overshadowed in front of the proliferation of AI robots in term with self-growth. I believe that AI with the automatic functions and it is dificult to make mistakes because they are designed for the detailed and efficient works. Nevertheless, individuals have the authority to make informed decisions and by making mistakes leads to the valuable experience, it is the primary methods for humans to retain knowledge and enhance the skills like critical thinking. This is because i firmly believe that humans have the ability to develop unlimitedly. For instance, in the old days, in many fields like economy, it is dificult for AI to exposure directly the pratical situation to pinpoint the well-suited orientation.
Moreover, AI is hindered in front of the limitation of emotions to improve ability of accumulating many branches of knowledge radically. In reality, most of behaviors and thinking of human beings was restricted by emontional, so the trend for development depends much on a wide range thinkings. At the same time, AI is not able to comprehend humans’ s emontion that probably leading to unequality when it comes to making decisions. For instance, basing on the gender, group of age and experience, employers could list the groups exactly, but in AI‘s case, individuals have to gain the same income even if they strive for dedicating that could lead to the negative disagreements, long-term enhancement and reduce the productivity. In some fields, only humans could take over like teachers and doctors that needs to resilience and even unpredictable decisions that AI is not designed.
In conclusion, i firmly believe that humans place the dominant importance of all jobs and they are not outweighed by any ability of arificially intelligence due to restriction.


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

  1. "In our comtemporary society" -> "In contemporary society"
    Explanation: Correcting the spelling error from "comtemporary" to "contemporary" ensures the proper use of the word, which is essential for maintaining the academic tone of the essay.

  2. "artificial intellegient" -> "artificial intelligence"
    Explanation: Correcting the spelling error from "intellegient" to "intelligence" is necessary for accuracy and professionalism in academic writing.

  3. "play the key role" -> "play a key role"
    Explanation: The phrase "play the key role" is grammatically incorrect. The correct phrase is "play a key role," which is the standard form in formal English.

  4. "hence, there is a thought that" -> "hence, there is a notion that"
    Explanation: Replacing "thought" with "notion" provides a more precise and formal term suitable for academic writing, as "notion" refers to an idea or concept more accurately.

  5. "human being will be replaced" -> "humans will be replaced"
    Explanation: Using "humans" instead of "human being" is more concise and appropriate for formal writing, as it avoids the awkward and less common phrase "human being."

  6. "techonoly" -> "technology"
    Explanation: Correcting the spelling error from "techonoly" to "technology" ensures the proper use of the term, which is crucial for maintaining credibility in academic writing.

  7. "not practical to some certain exent" -> "not entirely practical"
    Explanation: Replacing "to some certain exent" with "not entirely practical" corrects the awkward and incorrect phrase, making the sentence clearer and more formal.

  8. "i will discover" -> "I will explore"
    Explanation: Capitalizing "I" and replacing "discover" with "explore" improves the formality and precision of the language, aligning it with academic standards.

  9. "never are overshadowed" -> "are not overshadowed"
    Explanation: Changing "never are overshadowed" to "are not overshadowed" corrects the grammatical structure, making the sentence more natural and correct.

  10. "in term with self-growth" -> "in terms of self-growth"
    Explanation: Correcting "in term" to "in terms" fixes a grammatical error, and adding "of" after "terms" clarifies the prepositional phrase.

  11. "it is dificult" -> "it is difficult"
    Explanation: Correcting the spelling error from "dificult" to "difficult" ensures the proper spelling of the word, which is essential for maintaining professionalism.

  12. "by making mistakes leads to the valuable experience" -> "by making mistakes leads to valuable experiences"
    Explanation: Changing "the valuable experience" to "valuable experiences" corrects the grammatical number agreement and pluralizes the noun to match the context.

  13. "it is the primary methods" -> "it is the primary method"
    Explanation: Correcting "methods" to "method" fixes the grammatical error, as "method" is the singular form required in this context.

  14. "i firmly believe" -> "I firmly believe"
    Explanation: Capitalizing "I" corrects the grammatical error, ensuring proper formality and adherence to standard English conventions.

  15. "in the old days" -> "in the past"
    Explanation: Replacing "in the old days" with "in the past" avoids the colloquial and informal tone of "old days," which is more suitable for academic writing.

  16. "it is dificult for AI to exposure" -> "it is difficult for AI to expose"
    Explanation: Correcting "dificult" to "difficult" and "exposure" to "expose" fixes spelling and verb form errors, enhancing the clarity and correctness of the sentence.

  17. "to pinpoint the well-suited orientation" -> "to identify the optimal orientation"
    Explanation: Replacing "pinpoint the well-suited orientation" with "identify the optimal orientation" uses more precise and formal vocabulary suitable for academic writing.

  18. "AI is hindered in front of the limitation" -> "AI is hindered by its limitations"
    Explanation: Changing "in front of the limitation" to "by its limitations" corrects the prepositional phrase and makes the sentence more direct and formal.

  19. "emontional" -> "emotional"
    Explanation: Correcting the spelling error from "emontional" to "emotional" ensures the proper spelling of the word, which is crucial for maintaining credibility.

  20. "s emontion" -> "emotions"
    Explanation: Correcting "s emontion" to "emotions" fixes a spelling error and grammatical mistake, improving the readability and accuracy of the text.

  21. "unequality"

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Task Response: 7

  • Answer All Parts of the Question:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay addresses the prompt by presenting the writer’s opinion that robots will not completely replace humans in the workforce. The author discusses reasons for this stance, such as the unique human capacity for critical thinking and emotional understanding. However, while the main idea is clear, the essay could benefit from a more structured approach to explicitly outline the different aspects of the question, particularly the implications of AI on various job sectors.
    • How to improve: To enhance the response, the writer should ensure that each part of the question is distinctly answered. This could involve clearly separating the discussion of reasons for the opinion and providing relevant examples in a more organized manner. For instance, the writer could dedicate separate paragraphs to discussing the limitations of AI in emotional intelligence and critical thinking.
  • Present a Clear Position Throughout:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position that humans will remain essential in the job market. However, the position could be more consistently reinforced throughout the essay. Phrases like "it is not practical to some certain extent" could be made more definitive to strengthen the argument. Additionally, some sentences are convoluted, which may confuse the reader about the author’s stance.
    • How to improve: To improve clarity, the writer should use straightforward language and avoid ambiguous phrases. It would also be beneficial to restate the main argument in the conclusion to reinforce the position taken throughout the essay.
  • Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents several ideas, such as the importance of human emotional intelligence and the ability to learn from mistakes. However, these ideas are not always well-supported with clear examples or elaboration. For instance, the mention of teachers and doctors as professions that require human qualities is a good point, but it could be expanded with specific examples or scenarios that illustrate why AI would struggle in these roles.
    • How to improve: The writer should aim to expand on each idea presented by providing specific examples or case studies that illustrate the points being made. This could involve discussing real-world instances where human judgment has outperformed AI or exploring the implications of AI in various job sectors in more detail.
  • Stay on Topic:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, discussing the role of AI in the workforce and the importance of human attributes. However, there are moments where the argument becomes slightly convoluted, particularly in the discussion of emotional intelligence, which could lead to confusion about how it directly relates to the overall argument.
    • How to improve: To maintain focus, the writer should ensure that each paragraph directly ties back to the main thesis. Clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph can help guide the reader and reinforce the connection to the central argument. Additionally, avoiding overly complex sentences will help keep the writing clear and focused.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a clear opinion, improvements in structure, clarity, and support for ideas would enhance the overall effectiveness of the response.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

  • Organize Information Logically:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear opinion and attempts to structure arguments logically. The introduction outlines the topic and states the writer’s stance, while the body paragraphs provide reasons supporting this viewpoint. However, the logical flow is occasionally disrupted by unclear transitions between ideas. For example, the shift from discussing the limitations of AI in decision-making to the emotional aspects of human behavior lacks a smooth connection, making it harder for the reader to follow the argument.
    • How to improve: To enhance logical organization, the writer should ensure that each paragraph clearly relates to the thesis statement and that there are clear topic sentences for each paragraph. Using transitional phrases such as "Furthermore," "In addition," or "Conversely" can help guide the reader through the argument more effectively.
  • Use Paragraphs:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay uses paragraphs, but their structure could be improved. Each paragraph should ideally focus on a single main idea. In this essay, the first body paragraph combines several ideas about AI’s efficiency and human decision-making without clearly delineating them. This can confuse readers about the main point of the paragraph.
    • How to improve: The writer should aim to separate distinct ideas into their own paragraphs. For instance, one paragraph could focus solely on the advantages of human decision-making, while another could discuss the emotional limitations of AI. This will help clarify the argument and make it easier for the reader to digest the information.
  • Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay employs some cohesive devices, such as "for instance" and "moreover," but their use is somewhat limited and inconsistent. Additionally, there are instances where the connections between sentences could be clearer. For example, the phrase "this is because" is used, but it is not always clear what it is referring to, leading to potential confusion.
    • How to improve: To diversify and effectively use cohesive devices, the writer should incorporate a wider range of linking words and phrases. Using synonyms for "for instance," such as "for example" or "to illustrate," can add variety. Additionally, ensuring that each cohesive device clearly connects ideas will improve the overall coherence of the essay. The writer could also consider using pronouns or synonyms to avoid repetition and maintain flow.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and presents a coherent argument, improvements in logical organization, paragraph structure, and the use of cohesive devices would enhance clarity and coherence, potentially raising the band score.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

  • Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, with terms such as "artificial intelligence," "innovative technology," and "critical thinking." However, there are instances of repetition and limited variation in word choice, particularly with phrases like "humans have the ability" and "AI is hindered." The use of "difficult" and "limitations" appears multiple times, which detracts from the overall lexical variety.
    • How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, the writer should incorporate synonyms and related terms. For example, instead of repeating "difficult," alternatives like "challenging" or "arduous" could be used. Additionally, exploring more specific terms related to AI and job sectors could enrich the essay. Using a thesaurus to find synonyms and practicing with vocabulary exercises can help broaden word choice.
  • Use Vocabulary Precisely:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains several instances of imprecise vocabulary usage. For example, "humans never are overshadowed" is awkwardly phrased and could be more clearly expressed as "humans cannot be overshadowed." The phrase "in term with self-growth" is also unclear; it would be better articulated as "in terms of self-growth." Furthermore, "the ability to develop unlimitedly" is vague and could be more precisely stated as "the potential for continuous development."
    • How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should focus on clarity and appropriateness of word choice. Reviewing phrases for clarity and ensuring that they convey the intended meaning accurately is essential. Engaging in exercises that emphasize context and usage of vocabulary in sentences can also aid in developing this skill.
  • Use Correct Spelling:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains multiple spelling errors, such as "artificailly" (artificially), "intellegient" (intelligent), "techonoly" (technology), "dificult" (difficult), "emontional" (emotional), and "arificially" (artificially). These mistakes can distract the reader and undermine the writer’s credibility.
    • How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, the writer should engage in regular spelling practice, perhaps using flashcards or spelling apps. Additionally, proofreading the essay multiple times or using spell-check tools can help catch errors before submission. Reading more extensively can also improve spelling through exposure to correctly spelled words in context.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents coherent arguments, improvements in vocabulary range, precision, and spelling are necessary to achieve a higher band score in Lexical Resource.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 5

  • Use a Wide Range of Structures:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates some variety in sentence structures, including simple, compound, and complex sentences. For example, the phrase "In my opinion, it is not practical to some certain extent" shows an attempt at complexity. However, the overall range is limited, and many sentences are awkwardly constructed, such as "humans never are overshadowed in front of the proliferation of AI robots in term with self-growth," which lacks clarity and fluency. Additionally, there are instances of run-on sentences and lack of proper conjunctions, which hinder the flow of ideas.
    • How to improve: To enhance the variety of sentence structures, the writer should practice using different types of clauses and conjunctions. For instance, incorporating more relative clauses (e.g., "which are designed for…") and conditional sentences (e.g., "If humans continue to learn…") can add complexity. Additionally, breaking down long sentences into shorter, clearer ones can improve readability and coherence.
  • Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains numerous grammatical errors and punctuation issues. For example, "artificial intellegient" should be "artificial intelligence," and "dificult" should be "difficult." The misuse of articles, such as "the key role in the development of most of fields," should be corrected to "the development of most fields." There are also issues with subject-verb agreement, as seen in "humans never are overshadowed," which should be rephrased for clarity. Punctuation errors, such as the incorrect use of commas, contribute to the overall lack of coherence in some sentences.
    • How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should focus on proofreading their work for common errors, such as spelling mistakes and subject-verb agreement. Practicing grammar exercises targeting specific weaknesses (e.g., articles, verb tenses) can also be beneficial. Additionally, using grammar-checking tools or seeking feedback from peers can help identify and correct errors before finalizing the essay.

In summary, while the essay presents a relevant opinion on the topic, the limited range of sentence structures and frequent grammatical errors significantly impact clarity and coherence. By diversifying sentence structures and focusing on grammatical accuracy, the writer can improve their score in this criterion.

Bài sửa mẫu

In our contemporary society, it is evident that artificial intelligence plays a key role in the development of various fields. Hence, there is a notion that, in the future, humans will be replaced by innovative technology such as automated robots. In my opinion, this idea is not entirely practical. In this essay, I will explore the reasons why robots will never take over all jobs.

It is true that humans are not overshadowed by the proliferation of AI robots in terms of self-growth. I believe that while AI possesses automatic functions and is designed for detailed and efficient tasks, it is difficult for these systems to make mistakes. However, individuals have the authority to make informed decisions, and making mistakes leads to valuable experiences; this is the primary method for humans to retain knowledge and enhance skills such as critical thinking. I firmly believe that humans have the ability to develop endlessly. For instance, in the past, in many fields such as economics, it is difficult for AI to directly expose practical situations to identify the optimal orientation.

Moreover, AI is hindered by its limitations regarding emotions, which are essential for accumulating knowledge across various domains. In reality, most human behaviors and thinking processes are influenced by emotions, so the trend for development relies heavily on a wide range of perspectives. At the same time, AI is not able to comprehend human emotions, which could lead to inequality in decision-making. For instance, based on gender, age group, and experience, employers can accurately assess different groups, but in the case of AI, individuals may receive the same income despite varying levels of dedication. This could result in negative disagreements, hinder long-term enhancement, and reduce productivity. In certain fields, only humans can excel, such as teaching and medicine, which require resilience and the ability to make unpredictable decisions—qualities that AI is not designed to replicate.

In conclusion, I firmly believe that humans hold a dominant position in the workforce, and their capabilities are not outweighed by any abilities of artificial intelligence due to inherent restrictions.

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