Some people think that newly built houses should follow the style of old houses in local areas. Others think that people should have freedom to build houses of their own style. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

While there is growing concern that newly built houses should be designed in the same style as the old ones in local areas, some people argue that individuals should have the right to build houses in a style of their own preference. However, I tend towards the second viewpoint based on the following grounds.
On the one hand, there are some reasons why all buildings in a particular area should have the same style. First of all, this helps preserve the cultural heritage and historical identity of a region. For example, in Vietnam, the traditional tube houses, or "nhà ống," found in the old quarters of Hanoi, are a distinctive feature of the city's architectural heritage. In fact, these narrow, elongated houses reflect the historical context of high land prices and dense urban populations, allowing residents and visitors to understand the past. Additionally, maintaining these architectural styles can enhance the aesthetic appeal of a neighborhood, creating a cohesive and visually pleasing environment. This can have economic benefits as well, potentially increasing property values and attracting tourism.
On the other hand, it should be people’s right to build their own accommodations in their own styles. Firstly, allowing individuals to design and build houses according to their own preferences and needs can lead to a more diverse and vibrant community. Architectural innovation can introduce new materials, technologies, and design concepts that may be more environmentally friendly and better suited to contemporary lifestyles. Secondly, restricting architectural styles can stifle(= prevent) creativity and cause some boredom. Personal freedom in housing design respects individual tastes and needs, which can vary widely, undoubtedly promoting a sense of ownership and satisfaction among homeowners.
In conclusion, even though there are certain justifications for buildings in an area to be constructed in the same style, I go along with the opinion that creativity and innovation should be encouraged in housing designs so that people can embrace new trends and communicate their own personalities.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"While there is growing concern" -> "As there is increasing concern"
Explanation: "As there is increasing concern" is a more formal and precise way to introduce a topic, aligning better with academic style by implying a gradual development of the issue.
"some people argue" -> "some individuals contend"
Explanation: "Some individuals contend" is more formal and precise, suitable for academic writing, as it avoids the casual tone of "some people argue."
"in a style of their own preference" -> "in a style of their choice"
Explanation: "In a style of their choice" is more formal and avoids the redundancy of "of their own preference," which is slightly informal and redundant.
"On the one hand" -> "On one hand"
Explanation: "On one hand" is a more concise and formal way to introduce contrasting viewpoints in academic writing, eliminating the unnecessary "the" before "one hand."
"First of all" -> "Firstly"
Explanation: "Firstly" is a more formal transitional phrase suitable for academic writing, enhancing the flow and formality of the text.
"helps preserve" -> "contributes to the preservation of"
Explanation: "Contributes to the preservation of" is more formal and precise, emphasizing the role of the action in a more academic context.
"the traditional tube houses" -> "the traditional tube houses, known as ‘nhà ống’"
Explanation: Adding "known as ‘nhà ống’" provides specificity and cultural context, enhancing the academic tone by providing a precise term for the houses in question.
"are a distinctive feature" -> "constitute a distinctive feature"
Explanation: "Constitute" is a more formal verb that better fits the academic style, emphasizing the role of the houses in defining the city’s heritage.
"enhance the aesthetic appeal" -> "enhance the aesthetic value"
Explanation: "Enhance the aesthetic value" is a more precise and formal expression, suitable for academic writing, as it directly relates to the cultural and historical significance of the architectural styles.
"can have economic benefits" -> "may yield economic benefits"
Explanation: "May yield economic benefits" is more formal and speculative, fitting the academic style by indicating potential outcomes rather than stating them as definite.
"stifle" -> "curtail"
Explanation: "Curtail" is a more formal synonym for "stifle," aligning better with the academic tone and avoiding the slightly informal connotation of "stifle."
"cause some boredom" -> "result in monotony"
Explanation: "Result in monotony" is a more formal and precise term, replacing the colloquial "cause some boredom," which is too informal for academic writing.
"Personal freedom in housing design" -> "Personal autonomy in housing design"
Explanation: "Personal autonomy" is a more formal and precise term than "personal freedom," which is slightly informal and vague in this context.
"can vary widely" -> "can be highly diverse"
Explanation: "Can be highly diverse" is a more formal and academically appropriate way to describe the range of possibilities, enhancing the precision and formality of the statement.
"go along with the opinion" -> "support the view"
Explanation: "Support the view" is a more formal expression, replacing the colloquial "go along with the opinion," which is less suitable for academic writing.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both sides of the argument regarding whether newly built houses should follow the style of old houses or allow for individual expression. The first body paragraph presents the reasons for maintaining traditional styles, citing cultural heritage and aesthetic appeal, while the second body paragraph argues for personal freedom in architectural design, emphasizing diversity and innovation. Both perspectives are discussed adequately, fulfilling the task requirements.
- How to improve: To enhance the response further, the writer could integrate a more explicit comparison between the two viewpoints, perhaps by discussing the potential conflicts or synergies between preserving heritage and encouraging innovation. Additionally, a more detailed exploration of how these two perspectives could coexist might provide a more nuanced answer.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The writer clearly states their position in favor of individual freedom in housing design, particularly in the introduction and conclusion. This stance is maintained throughout the essay, with arguments supporting this view presented logically. However, the transition between discussing the two viewpoints could be smoother to reinforce the clarity of the position.
- How to improve: To maintain a clearer position, the writer could use transitional phrases that explicitly link back to their main argument when discussing the opposing view. For example, after presenting the reasons for preserving traditional styles, a sentence could be added to highlight how these reasons are outweighed by the benefits of personal freedom in design.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents several well-supported ideas, such as the importance of cultural heritage and the benefits of architectural innovation. Each point is backed by relevant examples, like the reference to Vietnam’s traditional tube houses, which effectively illustrates the argument. However, some ideas could be further developed to enhance depth.
- How to improve: The writer could strengthen their arguments by providing additional examples or data to support claims, particularly in the second body paragraph. For instance, mentioning specific contemporary architectural trends or successful case studies of innovative housing designs could add weight to the argument for personal freedom in design.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay remains focused on the topic throughout, discussing the two viewpoints without straying into unrelated areas. Each paragraph contributes to the overall discussion, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points while reiterating the writer’s opinion.
- How to improve: While the essay stays on topic, ensuring that each point directly ties back to the central question can further enhance coherence. The writer might consider explicitly stating how each argument relates to the broader implications of housing design in local areas, reinforcing the relevance of each point to the prompt.

Overall, this essay demonstrates a strong understanding of the task requirements and presents a well-structured argument. With slight adjustments to the depth of support and clarity of transitions, it could achieve an even higher score.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 8

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear and logical structure, effectively addressing the prompt by discussing both viewpoints before stating the author’s opinion. The introduction sets the stage for the discussion, and each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the argument. For instance, the first body paragraph discusses the benefits of maintaining traditional styles, while the second body paragraph highlights the advantages of individual freedom in design. This logical organization helps the reader follow the argument easily.
- How to improve: To enhance the logical flow, consider using more explicit linking phrases at the beginning of each paragraph to signal transitions. For example, phrases like "On the contrary" or "In addition to this" can help clarify the relationship between ideas and improve the overall coherence of the essay.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct argument. The introduction, two body paragraphs, and conclusion are clearly delineated, which aids readability. Each paragraph contains a clear topic sentence that outlines the main idea, followed by supporting details and examples.
- How to improve: While the paragraphing is generally effective, it may benefit from a more developed conclusion that summarizes the main points discussed in the body paragraphs. This could reinforce the arguments made and provide a stronger closure to the essay. Additionally, consider ensuring that each paragraph contains a balance of examples and explanations to maintain reader engagement.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good use of cohesive devices, such as "first of all," "for example," and "on the one hand," which help to connect ideas and guide the reader through the argument. The use of these devices contributes to the overall cohesion of the text, making it easier to follow the writer’s line of reasoning.
- How to improve: To further diversify the use of cohesive devices, consider incorporating more varied linking words and phrases throughout the essay. For instance, using "furthermore," "in contrast," or "consequently" can enhance the richness of the text and provide clearer connections between ideas. Additionally, ensure that cohesive devices are used appropriately and not excessively, as overuse can lead to a mechanical feel in writing.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong command of coherence and cohesion, effectively addressing the prompt while maintaining a clear and logical structure. By implementing the suggested improvements, the essay could achieve an even higher level of coherence and cohesion.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 7

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary relevant to the topic. Terms such as "cultural heritage," "architectural innovation," and "aesthetic appeal" are effectively employed to convey complex ideas. The use of phrases like "historical identity" and "visually pleasing environment" adds depth to the argument. However, while the vocabulary is varied, some phrases could be more sophisticated or nuanced to elevate the language further.
- How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, consider incorporating more advanced synonyms or less common expressions. For instance, instead of repeating "style," you could use "design aesthetic" or "architectural motif." Additionally, integrating idiomatic expressions or collocations related to architecture and community could enrich the language.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally uses vocabulary accurately, with phrases like "preserve the cultural heritage" and "enhance the aesthetic appeal" being appropriately applied. However, there are instances where the precision could be improved. For example, the phrase "stifle creativity and cause some boredom" could be seen as somewhat vague; "stifle creativity" is clear, but "cause some boredom" lacks specificity and impact.
- How to improve: Aim for more precise language that conveys your ideas clearly and powerfully. Instead of "cause some boredom," consider using "lead to a monotonous architectural landscape" to better articulate the potential consequences of restrictive design policies. Additionally, ensure that all terms used are contextually appropriate and convey the intended meaning without ambiguity.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay displays a high level of spelling accuracy, with no noticeable errors in the text. Words such as "accommodations," "individuals," and "preferences" are spelled correctly, contributing to the overall professionalism of the writing. However, the use of "stifle(= prevent)" is unconventional and could be misinterpreted as a spelling error or an informal notation.
- How to improve: Maintain the high standard of spelling by avoiding unconventional annotations or symbols. Instead of using "stifle(= prevent)," simply choose one term that fits the context. Regular practice with spelling through writing exercises or vocabulary quizzes can further solidify spelling skills. Additionally, reading widely can help reinforce correct spelling through exposure to well-written texts.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a solid command of lexical resource, achieving a Band Score of 7. By focusing on expanding vocabulary range, enhancing precision in word choice, and maintaining spelling accuracy, the essay could potentially reach a higher band score in future assessments.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 8

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of sentence structures. For instance, complex sentences such as "While there is growing concern that newly built houses should be designed in the same style as the old ones in local areas, some people argue that individuals should have the right to build houses in a style of their own preference" effectively convey contrasting viewpoints. Additionally, the use of conditional phrases like "if…then" and relative clauses (e.g., "which can vary widely") enrich the text. However, there are instances of simpler sentence constructions that could be enhanced, such as the repetitive use of "should" and "can" in several sentences, which slightly detracts from the overall variety.
- How to improve: To diversify sentence structures further, consider incorporating more compound-complex sentences and varying the use of modal verbs. For example, instead of repeatedly using "should," try alternatives like "might," "could," or "may" to express possibility or suggestion. Additionally, integrating more participial phrases or gerunds could add complexity and fluidity to your writing.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay exhibits a high level of grammatical accuracy, with only minor errors present. For instance, the phrase "stifle(= prevent)" is an unusual notation that may confuse readers; it would be clearer to use "stifle" alone or provide a more conventional synonym. Additionally, punctuation is generally well-handled, with appropriate use of commas to separate clauses and items in a list. However, there are a few instances where commas could enhance clarity, such as before "which can vary widely" to separate the clause more distinctly.
- How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy and punctuation, focus on eliminating unnecessary notations or symbols that may detract from clarity. Instead of using "stifle(= prevent)," simply use "stifle" and ensure the context makes the meaning clear. Additionally, review punctuation rules regarding clauses and consider using more commas to enhance readability. For example, in the sentence "allowing individuals to design and build houses according to their own preferences and needs can lead to a more diverse and vibrant community," a comma after "needs" could clarify the sentence structure.

Overall, the essay is well-structured and presents a balanced argument with a strong command of grammatical range and accuracy. By implementing the suggested improvements, you can further elevate the quality of your writing.

Bài sửa mẫu

While there is increasing concern that newly built houses should be designed in the same style as the old ones in local areas, some people argue that individuals should have the right to build houses in a style of their own choice. However, I tend towards the second viewpoint based on the following grounds.

On one hand, there are some reasons why all buildings in a particular area should have the same style. Firstly, this helps contribute to the preservation of the cultural heritage and historical identity of a region. For example, in Vietnam, the traditional tube houses, or “nhà ống,” found in the old quarters of Hanoi, constitute a distinctive feature of the city’s architectural heritage. In fact, these narrow, elongated houses reflect the historical context of high land prices and dense urban populations, allowing residents and visitors to understand the past. Additionally, maintaining these architectural styles can enhance the aesthetic value of a neighborhood, creating a cohesive and visually pleasing environment. This can also yield economic benefits, potentially increasing property values and attracting tourism.

On the other hand, it should be people’s right to build their own accommodations in their own styles. Firstly, allowing individuals to design and build houses according to their own preferences and needs can lead to a more diverse and vibrant community. Architectural innovation can introduce new materials, technologies, and design concepts that may be more environmentally friendly and better suited to contemporary lifestyles. Secondly, restricting architectural styles can curtail creativity and result in monotony. Personal autonomy in housing design respects individual tastes and needs, which can vary widely, undoubtedly promoting a sense of ownership and satisfaction among homeowners.

In conclusion, even though there are certain justifications for buildings in an area to be constructed in the same style, I support the view that creativity and innovation should be encouraged in housing designs so that people can embrace new trends and express their own personalities.