Some people want governments to spend money looking for life on other planets. Others, however, think this is a waste of public money when there are so many problems on earth. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people want governments to spend money looking for life on other planets.
Others, however, think this is a waste of public money when there are so many problems on earth.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Resource allocation for space exploration has provoked animated discussions among multiple individuals and organizations worldwide. While some people posit that the government should devote a fair amount of money to scouring for life signals in space, the majority of people advocate diverting that money to tackling pressing problems arising on planet Earth. From my vantage point, although there are aspects of life on Earth that need unflagging support from the government, searching for life in outer space and cosmos exploration in general should receive financial aid for reasons pertaining to living space expansion and technological advancements.

On one hand, the concerns regarding the wastefulness of public money can be valid to some extent. It is true that the government has been squandering billions of dollars on detecting living organisms in outer space, and this so far has failed to yield any tangible results that are easily recognizable to the public's eyes. On the contrary, issues relating to social welfare, housing, and transportation infrastructure that are constantly putting a strain on ordinary people's daily lives often go unnoticed and are in dire need of government intervention. In this sense, it is fair to reckon that only after resolving these vital issues should the government continue to look for alternatives on other planets.

On the other hand, I would contend that people can reap various benefits from the exploration of other habitable planets. It is apparent that the world population has seen exponential growth, and people are growing out of overcrowded areas and depleting a multitude of valuable resources, hence the importance of an alternative planet. Furthermore, there are also certain spin-offs that underline the progress of continuous space exploration. For example, if it had not been for the space race between the US and USSR, many technologies we are well familiar with today such as memory foam and GPS would not have been developed. This justifies the strenuous effort of the entire process of launching people into space, and warrants that space exploration should be maintained in full swing.

In brief, although there are persistent problems that are devoid of the government's ferocious tackles, it is recommended that the government allocate a reasonable amount of money for the search for a brighter future on other planets.

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Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

1. "Resource allocation for space exploration has provoked animated discussions" -> "The allocation of resources for space exploration has sparked intense discussions"
   Explanation: Replacing "provoked animated discussions" with "sparked intense discussions" uses more precise and formal language, enhancing the academic tone of the sentence.

2. "the majority of people advocate diverting that money" -> "the majority advocate diverting that funding"
   Explanation: Replacing "people" with "advocate" and "money" with "funding" refines the language to be more specific and formal, suitable for an academic context.

3. "unflagging support" -> "unwavering support"
   Explanation: "Unwavering" is a more precise and formal term than "unflagging," which is somewhat colloquial and less commonly used in formal writing.

4. "searching for life in outer space and cosmos exploration" -> "searching for extraterrestrial life and exploring the cosmos"
   Explanation: "Extraterrestrial life" and "exploring the cosmos" are more precise and scientifically accurate terms, enhancing the formal tone of the sentence.

5. "the government has been squandering billions of dollars" -> "the government has been allocating billions of dollars inefficiently"
   Explanation: "Allocating inefficiently" is a more neutral and academically appropriate phrase than "squandering," which carries a negative connotation.

6. "public’s eyes" -> "public’s view"
   Explanation: "Public’s view" is a more formal expression than "public’s eyes," which is somewhat metaphorical and less appropriate for academic writing.

7. "fair to reckon" -> "reasonable to assume"
   Explanation: "Reasonable to assume" is a more formal and academically appropriate phrase than "fair to reckon," which is colloquial and less precise.

8. "people can reap various benefits" -> "individuals can derive numerous benefits"
   Explanation: "Individuals can derive numerous benefits" uses more formal vocabulary and is more precise than "people can reap various benefits."

9. "growing out of overcrowded areas" -> "overcrowding"
   Explanation: "Overcrowding" is a more concise and formal term than "growing out of overcrowded areas," which is awkward and less precise.

10. "depleting a multitude of valuable resources" -> "depleting numerous valuable resources"
    Explanation: "Numerous" is more precise and formal than "a multitude," which is somewhat vague and less commonly used in formal writing.

11. "spin-offs that underline the progress" -> "spin-offs that underscore the progress"
    Explanation: "Underscore" is the correct term in this context, replacing the less formal "underline."

12. "well familiar with today" -> "well-known today"
    Explanation: "Well-known today" is a more formal and precise expression than "well familiar with today," which is awkward and less formal.

13. "ferocious tackles" -> "vigorous efforts"
    Explanation: "Vigorous efforts" is a more appropriate and formal term than "ferocious tackles," which is metaphorical and less suitable for an academic context.

14. "allocate a reasonable amount of money" -> "allocate a reasonable amount of funding"
    Explanation: Replacing "money" with "funding" maintains consistency with the earlier use of "funding" and enhances the formality of the sentence.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8

• Answer All Parts of the Question:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both views regarding government spending on space exploration versus addressing pressing issues on Earth. The first body paragraph presents the argument against space exploration, highlighting the need for government intervention in social welfare, housing, and infrastructure. The second body paragraph counters this by discussing the benefits of space exploration, such as potential living space expansion and technological advancements. However, the essay could have more explicitly stated the opposing viewpoint in the introduction to enhance clarity.
  • How to improve: To comprehensively address all elements of the question, ensure that the introduction succinctly outlines both perspectives before delving into the discussion. This can help the reader understand the structure of the argument from the outset.

• Present a Clear Position Throughout:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position that supports space exploration while acknowledging the validity of concerns regarding Earth’s issues. The phrase "from my vantage point" clearly indicates the author’s stance. However, the conclusion could be more assertive in reiterating this position, as it somewhat dilutes the strength of the argument.
  • How to improve: Strengthen the conclusion by explicitly restating your opinion and summarizing the key reasons supporting it. This will reinforce your position and leave a lasting impression on the reader.

• Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay presents and supports ideas well, particularly in the second body paragraph, where it discusses the benefits of space exploration with specific examples, such as technological advancements from the space race. However, the first body paragraph could benefit from more detailed examples or statistics to substantiate claims about the need for addressing Earth’s problems.
  • How to improve: Incorporate specific examples, data, or anecdotes in the first body paragraph to strengthen the argument against space exploration. This could include statistics on poverty, healthcare, or infrastructure issues to provide a more compelling case.

• Stay on Topic:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay remains largely focused on the topic, discussing both views and providing a personal opinion. However, some sentences, particularly in the first body paragraph, could be seen as slightly tangential, such as the mention of "squandering billions of dollars," which lacks specific context or examples.
  • How to improve: Ensure that every point made directly relates back to the prompt. Avoid vague statements and instead provide concrete examples or references to specific programs or expenditures that illustrate the argument more effectively. This will enhance relevance and clarity throughout the essay.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

• Organize Information Logically:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure, beginning with an introduction that outlines the two opposing views regarding government spending on space exploration. The body paragraphs are logically organized, with one focusing on the arguments against space exploration and the other supporting it. For instance, the first body paragraph effectively discusses the concerns about public spending, while the second highlights the potential benefits of space exploration. However, the transition between the two views could be smoother to enhance the overall flow.
  • How to improve: To improve logical organization, consider using clearer topic sentences that explicitly state the main idea of each paragraph. Additionally, incorporating transitional phrases (e.g., "Conversely," "On the contrary") at the beginning of paragraphs can help guide the reader through the argument more fluidly.

• Use Paragraphs:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay utilizes paragraphs effectively, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct aspect of the discussion. The introduction sets the stage, while the body paragraphs delve into opposing views. However, the conclusion could benefit from being more distinct and summarizing the key points made in the body paragraphs rather than introducing new ideas.
  • How to improve: Ensure that the conclusion succinctly restates the main arguments presented in the essay without introducing new concepts. This can reinforce the coherence of the essay and provide a clear closure. Additionally, consider using a more formal structure for the conclusion, such as "In conclusion," to signal the end of the discussion.

• Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay employs a variety of cohesive devices, such as "On one hand," "On the other hand," and "In brief," which help to connect ideas and guide the reader. However, there are instances where the use of cohesive devices could be more varied. For example, the phrase "it is true that" is repeated, which can detract from the overall fluidity of the writing.
  • How to improve: To enhance the use of cohesive devices, aim to diversify the phrases used to connect ideas. Instead of repeating "it is true that," consider alternatives like "Indeed," "Undoubtedly," or "It is important to acknowledge that." Additionally, incorporating more linking words (e.g., "Furthermore," "Moreover," "However") can help create a more nuanced and cohesive argument throughout the essay.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents arguments effectively. By focusing on improving transitions, refining the conclusion, and diversifying cohesive devices, the coherence and cohesion of the writing can be further enhanced, potentially leading to a higher band score.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 7

• Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable range of vocabulary, with terms such as "resource allocation," "animated discussions," "scouring for life signals," and "spin-offs." These phrases reflect a good command of language and the ability to convey complex ideas. However, some vocabulary choices could be more varied; for instance, the repeated use of "government" and "space exploration" could be substituted with synonyms or paraphrased to enhance lexical diversity.
  • How to improve: To improve, consider using synonyms or related phrases. For example, instead of repeatedly using "government," you could use "authorities," "administration," or "public sector." Additionally, varying terms related to "space exploration" could include "cosmic research," "extraterrestrial studies," or "interstellar investigation."

• Use Vocabulary Precisely:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay generally uses vocabulary accurately, but there are instances of imprecision. For example, the phrase "squandering billions of dollars" could imply a lack of any beneficial outcome, which may not accurately reflect the potential long-term benefits of space exploration. Additionally, "living space expansion" could be misinterpreted; it might be clearer to specify "habitable environments" or "colonization of other planets."
  • How to improve: To enhance precision, carefully consider the connotations of the words you choose. Instead of "squandering," you might say "investing" or "allocating funds," which would reflect a more neutral stance. Ensure that terms like "living space expansion" are clearly defined or rephrased to avoid ambiguity.

• Use Correct Spelling:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay displays a high level of spelling accuracy, with no noticeable errors. Words such as "exponential," "depleting," and "intervention" are spelled correctly, contributing to the overall clarity and professionalism of the writing.
  • How to improve: While spelling is strong, it’s always beneficial to maintain this standard. Regular practice through writing exercises, reading extensively, and utilizing spell-check tools can help sustain high spelling accuracy. Additionally, reviewing common spelling patterns and exceptions in English can further solidify this skill.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid command of vocabulary, there are opportunities for improvement in terms of variety, precision, and maintaining high spelling accuracy. By incorporating more synonyms, refining word choices for clarity, and continuing to practice spelling, the writer can enhance their lexical resource further.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 8

• Use a Wide Range of Structures:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of sentence structures. For instance, the use of complex sentences such as "While some people posit that the government should devote a fair amount of money to scouring for life signals in space, the majority of people advocate diverting that money to tackling pressing problems arising on planet Earth" showcases the writer’s ability to convey nuanced ideas. Additionally, the essay effectively employs conditional structures, as seen in "if it had not been for the space race between the US and USSR, many technologies we are well familiar with today such as memory foam and GPS would not have been developed." This variety contributes to a more engaging and sophisticated argument.
  • How to improve: To further enhance the range of structures, thewriter could incorporate more varied introductory phrases and transition words to connect ideas more fluidly. For example, using phrases like "In contrast," or "Moreover," at the beginning of paragraphs could add depth to the argumentation. Additionally, experimenting with more rhetorical questions or exclamatory sentences could further diversify the tone and structure.

• Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay generally exhibits a high level of grammatical accuracy. Most sentences are free from errors, and punctuation is used effectively to clarify meaning. However, there are minor issues, such as in the phrase "the government has been squandering billions of dollars on detecting living organisms in outer space," where "detecting" could be more clearly expressed as "to detect" for better parallelism with "squandering." Additionally, the phrase "devoid of the government’s ferocious tackles" could be rephrased for clarity, as "ferocious tackles" is somewhat informal and may not convey the intended seriousness of the government’s efforts.
  • How to improve: To enhance grammatical accuracy, the writer should focus on refining sentence clarity and ensuring parallel structure. Reviewing the essay for instances where verb forms or prepositions may not align with the intended meaning can also help. Furthermore, practicing punctuation rules, particularly with commas in complex sentences, can ensure that ideas are presented clearly and effectively.

Overall, the essay is well-structured and demonstrates a strong command of grammatical range and accuracy. By focusing on diversifying sentence structures and refining grammatical precision, the writer can aim for an even higher band score in future essays.

Bài sửa mẫu

The allocation of resources for space exploration has sparked intense discussions among individuals and organizations worldwide. While some people posit that the government should devote a reasonable amount of funding to searching for life signals in space, the majority advocate diverting that money to tackle pressing problems on Earth. From my perspective, although there are aspects of life on Earth that require unwavering support from the government, searching for extraterrestrial life and exploring the cosmos should also receive financial aid for reasons related to living space expansion and technological advancements.

On one hand, concerns regarding the wastefulness of public money can be valid to some extent. It is true that the government has been allocating billions of dollars inefficiently in the pursuit of detecting living organisms in outer space, and this endeavor has so far failed to yield any tangible results that are easily recognizable to the public’s view. In contrast, issues related to social welfare, housing, and transportation infrastructure are constantly straining ordinary people’s daily lives and often go unnoticed. In this sense, it is reasonable to assume that only after resolving these vital issues should the government continue to explore alternatives on other planets.

On the other hand, I would contend that individuals can derive numerous benefits from the exploration of other habitable planets. The world population has seen exponential growth, leading to overcrowding and depleting numerous valuable resources, which underscores the importance of finding alternative planets. Furthermore, there are certain spin-offs that highlight the progress of continuous space exploration. For example, if it had not been for the space race between the US and USSR, many technologies we are well-known today, such as memory foam and GPS, would not have been developed. This justifies the vigorous efforts involved in launching people into space and warrants that space exploration should be maintained in full swing.

In brief, although there are persistent problems that require the government’s vigorous tackles, it is essential that the government allocate a reasonable amount of funding for the search for a brighter future on other planets.