The chart below shows the percentage of water in UK rivers that was classified as having good chemical quality between 1990 and 2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The chart below shows the percentage of water in UK rivers that was classified as having
good chemical quality between 1990 and 2002.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make
comparisons where relevant.
Write at least 150 words.

The line graph compares the percentage of river water in four UK regions—Wales, Northern Ireland, England, and Scotland—that was classified as having good chemical quality between 1990 and 2002.
It is clear that Northern Ireland consistently had the highest percentage of good water quality, while Wales showed the most significant fluctuations. England's water quality declined steadily, whereas Scotland saw an overall increase.
Looking first at Northern Ireland, the chemical quality of its river water remained consistently high, starting at 95% in 1990 and maintaining this level until a slight rise to nearly 100% by 2002. Wales, on the other hand, experienced substantial variation, with a rise from 55% in 1990 to a peak of 75% by 1996, followed by a sharp decline to just over 30% in 1998, before recovering to around 60% by 2002.
Turning to England and Scotland, England began with 70% of its river water classified as good in 1990, but this figure steadily decreased to 40% by the end of the period. In contrast, Scotland showed a significant upward trend, starting at 20% in 1990 and climbing to approximately 65% by 2002, despite a brief dip in 1996.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

1. "The line graph compares" -> "The line graph illustrates"
   Explanation: "Illustrates" is more precise and academically appropriate than "compares," as it accurately describes the analytical nature of the graph without implying a direct comparison between the data points.

2. "classified as having good chemical quality" -> "classified as having good chemical quality standards"
   Explanation: Adding "standards" specifies the criteria used for classification, enhancing clarity and precision in the academic context.

3. "It is clear that" -> "It is evident that"
   Explanation: "It is evident that" is a more formal and precise alternative to "It is clear that," fitting better in academic writing.

4. "consistently had the highest percentage" -> "consistently maintained the highest percentage"
   Explanation: "Maintained" is more specific and formal than "had," indicating a sustained condition over time.

5. "showed the most significant fluctuations" -> "exhibited the most significant fluctuations"
   Explanation: "Exhibited" is more formal and precise than "showed," aligning better with academic style.

6. "declined steadily" -> "steadily decreased"
   Explanation: "Decreased" is more direct and formal than "declined," which can imply a downward trend without necessarily being steady.

7. "saw an overall increase" -> "experienced a general increase"
   Explanation: "Experienced a general increase" is more formal and precise than "saw an overall increase," which is somewhat colloquial.

8. "Looking first at" -> "First, examining"
   Explanation: "Examining" is more formal and academic than "looking at," which is too conversational for scholarly writing.

9. "substantial variation" -> "marked variation"
   Explanation: "Marked" is a more precise adjective than "substantial," which can be vague in this context.

10. "a rise from 55% to a peak of 75% by 1996" -> "an increase from 55% to a peak of 75% in 1996"
    Explanation: Adding "in" clarifies the time reference, making the sentence more precise and formal.

11. "a sharp decline to just over 30%" -> "a significant decline to approximately 30%"
    Explanation: "Significant" is more formal than "sharp," and "approximately" is preferred over "just over" for academic precision.

12. "recovered to around 60%" -> "recovered to approximately 60%"
    Explanation: "Approximately" is more formal and precise than "around," which is somewhat informal.

13. "England began with 70%" -> "England initially had 70%"
    Explanation: "Initially" is more specific and formal than "began," and "had" is preferred over "began" in this context for clarity.

14. "started at 20%" -> "initially stood at 20%"
    Explanation: "Initially stood at" is more formal and precise than "started at," which is somewhat colloquial.

15. "climbing to approximately 65%" -> "increasing to approximately 65%"
    Explanation: "Increasing" is more specific and formal than "climbing," which is less typical in academic writing.

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 8

Band Score: 8.0

Explanation: The essay provides a clear overview of the main trends in the data, highlighting the key features of each region. It also makes appropriate comparisons between the regions, such as noting that Northern Ireland consistently had the highest percentage of good water quality, while Wales showed the most significant fluctuations. The essay is well-organized and easy to follow, with clear and concise language.

How to improve: The essay could be improved by providing more specific details about the trends and fluctuations in each region. For example, the essay could mention that Wales experienced a sharp decline in water quality between 1996 and 1998, or that Scotland’s water quality improved significantly between 1998 and 2002.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score: 7.0

Explanation: The essay logically organizes information and ideas, presenting a clear progression throughout. Each region is discussed in a structured manner, with appropriate transitions between paragraphs. The use of cohesive devices is generally effective, although there are instances of slight overuse, particularly in the transitions between the descriptions of different regions. Each paragraph presents a clear central topic, contributing to the overall coherence of the essay.

How to improve: To achieve a higher band score, the writer could focus on enhancing the variety of cohesive devices used, ensuring that they are neither under- nor over-used. Additionally, improving the clarity and logical flow of paragraphing could further strengthen the essay’s coherence. For instance, using more varied linking phrases and ensuring that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next would help in achieving a more sophisticated level of cohesion.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score: 7.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary that allows for some flexibility and precision in conveying the information from the graph. The use of terms like "consistently," "fluctuations," "substantial variation," and "upward trend" indicates an awareness of less common lexical items. However, there are occasional inaccuracies in word choice, such as "chemical quality" which could be more succinctly expressed as "water quality." The essay does not exhibit any significant spelling or word formation errors that impede communication, but the overall lexical resource is not as sophisticated or varied as that of a higher band score.

How to improve: To achieve a higher band score, the writer could incorporate a wider range of sophisticated vocabulary and idiomatic expressions. Additionally, ensuring precise word choice and avoiding repetition would enhance the overall lexical quality. More varied sentence structures and the use of uncommon lexical items with greater accuracy would also contribute to a stronger performance in this criterion.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score: 7.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates a good variety of complex sentence structures and maintains a generally high level of grammatical accuracy. The writer effectively uses a mix of simple and complex sentences, producing frequent error-free sentences. However, there are minor errors and occasional awkward phrasing that indicate a need for improvement in grammatical control. For example, the phrase "the chemical quality of its river water remained consistently high" could be simplified for clarity. Overall, the essay meets the criteria for Band 7 due to its good control of grammar and punctuation, despite some errors.

How to improve: To achieve a higher band score, the writer should focus on enhancing grammatical accuracy and flexibility. This can be done by practicing more complex sentence structures and ensuring that all sentences are free from errors. Additionally, reviewing punctuation rules and refining sentence clarity will help in producing a more polished essay. Regular feedback on writing can also aid in identifying and correcting persistent errors.

Bài sửa mẫu

The line graph compares the percentage of river water in four UK regions—Wales, Northern Ireland, England, and Scotland—that was classified as having good chemical quality between 1990 and 2002. It is evident that Northern Ireland consistently had the highest percentage of good water quality, while Wales exhibited the most significant fluctuations. England’s water quality declined steadily, whereas Scotland experienced an overall increase.

Looking first at Northern Ireland, the chemical quality of its river water remained consistently high, starting at 95% in 1990 and maintaining this level until a slight rise to nearly 100% by 2002. In contrast, Wales experienced substantial variation, with an increase from 55% in 1990 to a peak of 75% by 1996, followed by a sharp decline to just over 30% in 1998, before recovering to around 60% by 2002.

Turning to England and Scotland, England began with 70% of its river water classified as good in 1990, but this figure steadily decreased to 40% by the end of the period. In contrast, Scotland demonstrated a significant upward trend, starting at 20% in 1990 and climbing to approximately 65% by 2002, despite a brief dip in 1996.