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The charts show world pineapple exports by the top three pineapple-producing countries in 2009 and 2019, and a breakdown of the cost to the consumer of each pineapple in 2019. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts show world pineapple exports by the top three pineapple-producing countries in 2009 and 2019, and a breakdown of the cost to the consumer of each pineapple in 2019.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The shown bar chart and pie chart in combination illustrates world pineapple exports by three countries in the top three of producing pineapple in two years – 2009 and 2019; and also provides us how various price took part in to the final price which was paid by customers each pineapple.
A glance at two charts, in both two years, Country A exported a significant amount of pineapple overseas, which was reached a peak, comparing with the other countries; Nevertheless, there was a considerable decrease over the period. As it is observed, in the pie chart, distribution and retail took up the highest share in the price per pineapple in 2019.
It is worth noticing that in the bar chart, Country A's pineapple exports were approximately decupled in 2019 when comparing with an amount of this fruit's selling overseas in 2009. Despite this fact, Country B experienced a decline, leading to the result of reducing a roughly twofold number over the past 10 years. To be precise, Country C's exports yet were remained a negligible number of trading pineapples abroad, which was tediously lower than those other nations in both two years.
As it is shown in the pie chart's illustration, more than a third was consisted to the cost per pineapple by distribution and retail. Taxes and profit were considered to be nearly the same percentage with a total of 34%, followed by four other categorical breakdown cost – producer, export costs, international transport and import licences – just took up below three-tenths, whereas export costs were the lowest percentage share.


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

  1. "The shown bar chart and pie chart in combination illustrates" -> "The combined bar and pie charts illustrate"
    Explanation: "The combined bar and pie charts" provides a clearer and more concise description than "The shown bar chart and pie chart in combination illustrates," enhancing the readability of the sentence.

  2. "world pineapple exports by three countries in the top three of producing pineapple" -> "global pineapple exports from the top three producing countries"
    Explanation: The suggested phrase "global pineapple exports from the top three producing countries" streamlines the language and improves precision by using "global" instead of "world" and reordering the phrase for clarity.

  3. "various price took part in to the final price" -> "various components contributed to the final price"
    Explanation: Replacing "various price took part in to the final price" with "various components contributed to the final price" corrects grammatical errors and clarifies that multiple components make up the final price.

  4. "which was reached a peak" -> "which peaked"
    Explanation: The simpler term "peaked" replaces the clunky and grammatically incorrect "was reached a peak," making the sentence more concise and grammatically correct.

  5. "comparing with the other countries" -> "compared to other countries"
    Explanation: "Compared to other countries" is grammatically correct and more natural than "comparing with the other countries."

  6. "was a considerable decrease" -> "there was a significant decline"
    Explanation: "There was a significant decline" uses more appropriate and formal language compared to "was a considerable decrease."

  7. "approximately decupled" -> "approximately increased tenfold"
    Explanation: "Increased tenfold" is clearer and more standard than "decupled," which might be unfamiliar to many readers.

  8. "reducing a roughly twofold number" -> "halving"
    Explanation: The term "halving" is a more precise and succinct way to describe the action of reducing by approximately two times.

  9. "exports yet were remained" -> "exports still remained"
    Explanation: "Exports still remained" corrects the awkward and incorrect phrasing of "exports yet were remained."

  10. "tediously lower than those other nations" -> "substantially lower than those of other nations"
    Explanation: "Substantially lower than those of other nations" replaces the oddly used "tediously," which does not fit in this context, with a term that accurately reflects magnitude.

  11. "was consisted to the cost per pineapple" -> "constituted the cost per pineapple"
    Explanation: Replacing "was consisted to" with "constituted" corrects the grammar and clarifies the meaning.

  12. "categorical breakdown cost" -> "categorical cost breakdown"
    Explanation: "Categorical cost breakdown" is the correct and more natural order of words for describing detailed financial divisions.

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 6

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Band Score: 6.0
Explanation: The essay adequately addresses the task by summarizing the main features of the charts. It provides an overview of the pineapple exports by the top three countries in 2009 and 2019, noting significant changes in export volumes. The essay also highlights the breakdown of costs to the consumer in 2019, mentioning the highest cost components. However, the analysis lacks depth and clarity in some areas, such as the specific figures or trends in the charts, and the language is often imprecise or awkwardly phrased.
How to improve: To improve, the writer should strive for clearer and more precise language. Include specific figures and trends from the charts to support the analysis. Ensure that key points are clearly presented and that the essay is well-structured and organized. Additionally, focus on extending the analysis to provide more detailed insights into the data presented in the charts. Avoid irrelevant details and ensure that all information provided is accurate and directly relevant to the task.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6

Explanation: The essay arranges information and ideas coherently, with a clear overall progression. It effectively uses cohesive devices, although there are instances of faulty cohesion within and/or between sentences. Paragraphing is utilized, but not always logically. The central topic of each paragraph is generally clear, but there are areas where it could be improved for better clarity and coherence.

How to improve: To enhance coherence and cohesion, focus on improving the flow between sentences and paragraphs. Ensure that cohesive devices are used consistently and appropriately throughout the essay. Additionally, refine paragraphing to create clearer divisions between ideas and improve the overall organization of the essay. Clarify the central topic of each paragraph to strengthen the overall structure and coherence of the essay.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary with attempts to use less common vocabulary. There is some variety in word choice, though occasional inaccuracies and errors in word formation are present. The writer attempts to convey meaning with a mix of vocabulary, but there are inconsistencies and instances of awkward phrasing. Overall, the lexical resource is sufficient for the task, but improvements are needed for accuracy and clarity.

How to improve: To enhance lexical resource, focus on using vocabulary more accurately and precisely. Avoid awkward phrasing and grammatical errors. Expand vocabulary by incorporating more sophisticated and appropriate terms where possible. Proofreading for spelling and word formation errors will also help improve overall lexical quality. Additionally, strive for smoother transitions between ideas to enhance coherence and cohesion.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates an attempt to use a variety of sentence structures, although there are inconsistencies and errors in grammatical accuracy. There is an effort to incorporate complex sentences, but these are often less accurate than simpler ones, causing some difficulty for the reader. Some sentences lack clarity due to awkward phrasing and grammatical errors. However, the essay does convey the main features of the charts and makes relevant comparisons.

How to improve: To improve the grammatical range and accuracy, focus on using more varied sentence structures consistently. Pay attention to verb tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and sentence clarity. Proofreading for grammatical errors and punctuation can help enhance overall accuracy and readability. Additionally, strive for clearer and more concise expression of ideas to enhance communication effectiveness.

Bài sửa mẫu

The provided visual aids comprise a bar chart and a pie chart depicting the global pineapple exports from the leading three producing nations across two distinct years, specifically 2009 and 2019. Additionally, a breakdown of the various components contributing to the consumer price of each pineapple in 2019 is presented.

Upon reviewing both charts, it is evident that Country A consistently maintained a substantial lead in pineapple exports throughout the examined period, peaking notably in 2009 but subsequently experiencing a significant decline by 2019. Conversely, Country B witnessed a considerable decrease in exports, nearly halving its figures over the span of a decade. Meanwhile, Country C’s export figures remained notably marginal throughout both years, significantly lower compared to its counterparts.

Turning to the breakdown of consumer costs depicted in the pie chart for 2019, it is notable that distribution and retail expenses constituted the largest share, accounting for more than a third of the total cost per pineapple. Taxes and profit margins comprised a similar proportion, collectively totaling 34%. In contrast, the costs attributed to producers, exportation, international transportation, and import licenses collectively represented just under three-tenths of the total cost. Notably, export costs constituted the smallest percentage share among the listed components.

Bài viết liên quan

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more…

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