The graph above shows the proportion of four different materials that were recycled from 1982 to 2000 in a particular country.

The line chart illustrates the recycling rate of 4 kinds of material in a nation over a period of 30 years starting from 1982.
It is clear that paper and cardboard were consistently the most material recycled rate. It is also notable that the figure for plastic was the lowest during the period. The general trend in recycling is to increase over the time period presented.
In 1982, the percentage of material recycling rate which is highest was nearly 65%, which was significantly higher than the figure for glass containers, at only 50%. Over the following 20 years, the percentage of paper and cardboard recycling rate increased slightly before falling to 65%, followed by a climb dramatically to reach a peak of about 80% in 1994. By contrast, despite some minor fluctuations around 50 to 55% during the first 20 years, the figure for glass containers then significantly increased to 60% in the last year.
Aluminum cans appeared later than the two materials above in 1986. This material recycling rate rapidly increased from 5% to 35%. On the other hand, plastic hovering around 5% towards the end.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

Errors and Improvements:

"the recycling rate of 4 kinds of material" -> "the recycling rates of four types of materials"
Explanation: "Kinds" is a more colloquial term, while "types" is more formal and precise in an academic context. Additionally, "material" should be pluralized to agree with "four."
"It is clear that paper and cardboard were consistently the most material recycled rate." -> "It is evident that paper and cardboard consistently had the highest recycling rates."
Explanation: "Most material recycled rate" is awkward and lacks clarity. "Had the highest recycling rates" is clearer and more precise.
"It is also notable that the figure for plastic was the lowest during the period." -> "Additionally, the plastic recycling rate was the lowest throughout the period."
Explanation: "Figure" is ambiguous; specifying "plastic recycling rate" adds clarity.
"The general trend in recycling is to increase over the time period presented." -> "The general trend in recycling is an increase over the presented time period."
Explanation: Rearranging the sentence improves readability and maintains formal language.
"which is highest was nearly 65%" -> "which peaked at nearly 65%"
Explanation: "Highest" can be replaced with "peaked at" for clearer emphasis on the maximum value.
"before falling to 65%, followed by a climb dramatically to reach a peak of about 80%" -> "before declining to 65%, then sharply rising to peak at approximately 80%"
Explanation: "Falling" and "climb dramatically" could be replaced with more precise terms like "declining" and "sharply rising" to enhance clarity and formality.
"the figure for glass containers, at only 50%" -> "the figure for glass containers, which stood at only 50%"
Explanation: Adding "which stood at" clarifies the relationship between the figure and glass containers.
"the figure for glass containers then significantly increased to 60% in the last year." -> "the figure for glass containers then experienced a significant increase to 60% in the final year."
Explanation: Adding "experienced" emphasizes the change in the figure for glass containers, enhancing clarity.
"Aluminum cans appeared later than the two materials above in 1986." -> "Aluminum cans entered the picture in 1986, following the other two materials."
Explanation: "Appeared later than" can be replaced with "entered the picture in," which is more precise and formal.
"This material recycling rate rapidly increased from 5% to 35%." -> "The recycling rate for aluminum cans rapidly increased from 5% to 35%."
Explanation: Specifying "recycling rate for aluminum cans" adds clarity.
"On the other hand, plastic hovering around 5% towards the end." -> "Conversely, plastic hovered around 5% towards the end."
Explanation: "On the other hand" is replaced with "Conversely" for a smoother transition, and "hovering" is more precise than "hovering around."

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Task Response: 6 – UNDER WORD

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay adequately addresses the task by describing the trends in recycling rates for four different materials over a specified period. It identifies paper and cardboard as consistently having the highest recycling rates, notes the lowest rate for plastic, and outlines the general trend of increasing recycling rates over time.
- How to improve: To enhance task response, ensure that each aspect of the prompt is thoroughly covered. In this case, expanding on the significance of the trends observed or discussing potential reasons behind the fluctuations could provide a more comprehensive response.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear stance by objectively presenting the data without expressing personal opinions or biases. The language used is factual and descriptive, contributing to the clarity of the essay’s position.
- How to improve: To further improve clarity, consider explicitly stating the purpose or significance of analyzing the recycling rates presented in the graph. Providing a clear thesis statement or purpose statement can enhance the reader’s understanding of the essay’s objective.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents ideas regarding the recycling rates for different materials over time. It extends these ideas by providing specific details about each material’s recycling rate trends from 1982 to 2000. However, there is limited elaboration or analysis beyond describing the trends.
- How to improve: To strengthen the essay, consider providing deeper analysis or interpretation of the data presented. This could involve discussing potential reasons for the observed trends, comparing the recycling rates across materials, or exploring the implications of the findings.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic by focusing on the recycling rates of four different materials as depicted in the provided graph. However, there are instances where the discussion could be more focused, such as in the analysis of specific data points or trends.
- How to improve: To maintain better focus, ensure that each point made directly relates to the main topic of the recycling rates. Avoid tangential discussions or extraneous details that do not contribute to the analysis of the graph data.

Overall, while the essay effectively addresses the key components of the task and presents a clear overview of the recycling rate trends, there is room for improvement in providing deeper analysis and maintaining focus throughout the essay. By expanding on ideas, offering more detailed explanations, and ensuring relevance to the topic, the essay can achieve a higher band score for task response.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 6

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally presents a coherent overview of the data provided in the graph. It starts by introducing the main subject matter and the timeframe of the data (recycling rates of four materials from 1982 to 2000). The progression of the essay follows a chronological order, discussing the recycling rates of each material over the years. However, there are some areas where the organization could be improved. For instance, the transition between discussing paper/cardboard and glass containers could be smoother, perhaps by explicitly indicating the shift in focus from one material to another. Additionally, the conclusion could be strengthened by summarizing the main trends observed across all materials.
- How to improve: To enhance the logical flow and structure of the essay, consider using transition phrases to guide the reader through the different stages of the analysis. For instance, phrases like "Moving on to…" or "In contrast…" can help signal shifts in focus. Also, ensure that the conclusion provides a concise summary of the key trends observed in the recycling rates of all materials, reinforcing the overall coherence of the essay.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay is divided into three paragraphs, with each paragraph focusing on one or two materials and their respective recycling rates over the years. This division allows for a clear separation of ideas and facilitates readability. However, within paragraphs, there could be more variation in sentence structure to avoid monotony and enhance engagement.
- How to improve: While the use of paragraphs is generally effective, consider varying sentence structures within each paragraph to maintain reader interest. This can be achieved by incorporating complex sentences alongside simple ones, using transitional phrases to connect ideas, and ensuring coherence within paragraphs through the logical progression of thoughts.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay makes use of some cohesive devices, such as time markers ("in 1982", "over the following 20 years") and comparative phrases ("by contrast"). These devices help to connect ideas and guide the reader through the chronological progression of the data. However, there is room for improvement in the variety and consistency of cohesive devices used.
- How to improve: To diversify and effectively use cohesive devices, consider incorporating a wider range of connectors and transition words/phrases. These include words like "moreover", "furthermore", "on the other hand", "in addition", etc. Use them strategically to highlight relationships between ideas, such as cause and effect, contrast, and addition. Additionally, ensure consistency in the use of cohesive devices throughout the essay to maintain coherence and clarity.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a moderate range of vocabulary. There is some variety in the choice of words, such as "recycling rate," "significant," "fluctuations," "rapidly increased," and "hovering." However, some repetition is evident, like the frequent use of "material recycling rate" instead of employing synonyms or alternative phrases. Additionally, the vocabulary could be more diverse and precise to convey nuances more effectively.
- How to improve: To enhance the lexical resource, aim for greater diversity in vocabulary usage. Instead of repeatedly using phrases like "material recycling rate," consider employing synonyms or restructuring sentences to avoid redundancy. Introduce specialized vocabulary related to environmental sciences or waste management to enrich the essay’s language. For instance, instead of "rapidly increased," you might use "surged" or "skyrocketed" to convey a sharper image.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates some precision in vocabulary usage, with terms like "significant" and "fluctuations" effectively conveying specific meanings. However, there are instances where vocabulary could be more precise. For example, using "highest" and "lowest" to describe percentages could be refined by specifying the exact figures. Additionally, the use of "figure" is repeated multiple times without clear differentiation between statistical data and graphical elements.
- How to improve: Strive for greater precision by specifying exact values rather than relying solely on comparative terms like "highest" and "lowest." Clarify the usage of "figure" by distinguishing between numerical data and graphical representations. Consider using technical terms related to data analysis, such as "peak" or "trough," to provide more precise descriptions of trends.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally exhibits satisfactory spelling accuracy, with no glaring errors evident. However, there are minor spelling errors, such as "nation" instead of "country" and "material" instead of "materials." These errors do not significantly impede understanding but suggest a need for careful proofreading.
- How to improve: Improve spelling accuracy through diligent proofreading and the use of spell-checking tools. Pay close attention to commonly misspelled words, especially those related to the essay’s subject matter. Consider reviewing grammar and vocabulary alongside spelling to ensure overall linguistic accuracy and coherence.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a competent level of lexical resource, there is room for improvement in terms of vocabulary range, precision, and spelling accuracy. By incorporating a wider variety of vocabulary, employing terms more precisely, and refining spelling accuracy through careful proofreading, the essay can elevate its lexical quality and potentially achieve a higher band score.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a moderate range of sentence structures, including simple, compound, and complex sentences. There are instances of sentence variety such as the use of introductory phrases ("In 1982," "On the other hand"), passive voice ("It is clear that," "It is also notable that"), and transitions ("despite," "by contrast"). However, there is room for improvement in incorporating more complex structures, such as conditional sentences, relative clauses, and inversion, to enhance coherence and cohesion.
- How to improve: To improve the range of structures, consider using complex sentences with subordinating conjunctions (e.g., "Although the recycling rate of plastic remained low," "If measures are taken to promote recycling,"), relative clauses (e.g., "The material recycling rate, which had been steadily increasing," "The year when aluminum cans were introduced,"), and inverted sentences for emphasis or variety ("Not until 1986 did aluminum cans make their appearance"). Varying sentence lengths and structures will make the essay more engaging and demonstrate a higher level of grammatical range.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally maintains grammatical accuracy but has some noticeable errors and inconsistencies. For instance, there are issues with subject-verb agreement ("paper and cardboard were consistently the most material recycled rate"), article usage ("the most material recycled rate" should be "the most recycled material"), verb tense consistency ("the recycling rate of 4 kinds of material" should be "the recycling rates of four kinds of materials"), and missing articles ("recycling is to increase over the time period presented" should be "recycling is shown to increase over the presented time period"). Punctuation errors include missing commas in compound sentences and incorrect capitalization ("the percentage of material recycling rate" should be "the percentage of material recycling rate," and "it is clear that paper and cardboard were consistently the most material recycled rate" should be "It is clear that paper and cardboard were consistently the most recycled materials").
- How to improve: Focus on subject-verb agreement by ensuring that singular subjects match singular verbs and plural subjects match plural verbs ("paper and cardboard were consistently the most recycled materials"). Use articles appropriately ("the most recycled materials" instead of "the most material recycled rate"). Maintain verb tense consistency throughout the essay ("the recycling rates of four kinds of materials" instead of "the recycling rate of 4 kinds of material"). Pay attention to punctuation, including commas in compound sentences ("The line chart illustrates the recycling rate of four kinds of material in a nation over a period of 30 years, starting from 1982"). Review capitalization rules, especially for sentence beginnings and proper nouns ("It is clear that…"). Proofread carefully to catch and correct these grammatical and punctuation errors for improved accuracy.

Bài sửa mẫu

The provided line chart depicts the recycling rates of four different materials in a particular country from 1982 to 2000.

It is evident that paper and cardboard consistently maintained the highest recycling rates throughout the period. Notably, plastic had the lowest recycling rate among the materials studied. The overall trend in recycling shows an upward trajectory over the presented time frame.

In 1982, paper and cardboard reached a peak recycling rate of nearly 65%, substantially surpassing glass containers, which stood at only 50%. Over the subsequent two decades, the recycling rate for paper and cardboard experienced slight fluctuations before declining to 65%, followed by a sharp rise to approximately 80% in 1994. In contrast, the recycling rate for glass containers, after minor fluctuations between 50% and 55% during the initial 20 years, saw a significant increase to 60% in the final year.

Aluminum cans were introduced later, in 1986, following the other two materials. The recycling rate for aluminum cans rapidly escalated from 5% to 35%. Conversely, the recycling rate for plastic remained stagnant at around 5% towards the end of the period.