The preference for living in a two-generation family, often referred to as a nuclear family, has been a prevalent choice for many individuals. Write an essay to discuss the advantages and disadvantages of living in a two-generation family.

In contemporary society, having a nuclear family has increasingly emerged as a preference of the majority of individuals. While the merits of this trend is the focused environment provided for child-rearing and eased decision-making process, its drawback lies in the limitation of social support networks as well as interaction chances.
On one hand, a nuclear family importantly benefits by providing focused nurture for their children. This means parents can solely dedicate their most time for their own children’s upbringing. When parents are always by their youngster, the emotional family bonds are strongly fostered. Additionally, the smaller a family is, the more flexibility in finance are, allowing greater investment in education, time and healthcare. Another strong point for this is that the decision-making process can be more efficient and straightforward compared to an extended family. For example, when parents and children make discussions on an issue, their decision might be made effortlessly due to the reduced potential conflict.
On the other hand, the absence of extended family members can limit the social support network. This is illustrated by the fact that parents might be the main revenue source when their children are young, putting a financial pressure on the parents to fulfill multiple roles and leading to burnout and strained relationships as well. Lack of social interaction or exposure to various perspectives is an extra drawback of the nuclear family. When living in a small family, children have limited opportunities to socialize with other relatives or cousins. This hinders their social development and the potential isolation is unconsciously suffered.
To conclude, the two-generation family has played a crucial role in human life. In spite of the fact that while a nuclear family can offer a concentrated provision for their own children and the effortless decision-making process, its drawback related to limited social support networks and interaction opportunities can not be overlooked. Hence, it is essential for individuals to contemplate and make the right decision when raising a family.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"having a nuclear family has increasingly emerged as a preference of the majority of individuals" -> "the preference for nuclear families has increasingly become widespread among the majority of individuals"
Explanation: The original phrase is awkwardly constructed and unclear. The revised version clarifies the subject and verb agreement, enhancing readability and formality.
"the merits of this trend is the focused environment" -> "the merits of this trend include the provision of a focused environment"
Explanation: The original sentence lacks a plural verb form to match the plural noun "merits." The revision corrects this error and uses a more formal phrase structure.
"eased decision-making process" -> "simplified decision-making process"
Explanation: "Eased" is not typically used in this context; "simplified" is the correct term for reducing complexity in decision-making processes.
"the limitation of social support networks as well as interaction chances" -> "the limitations of social support networks and interaction opportunities"
Explanation: "Interaction chances" is an informal and vague term. "Interaction opportunities" is more precise and formal, fitting the academic style better.
"a nuclear family importantly benefits by providing" -> "a nuclear family benefits significantly by providing"
Explanation: "Importantly" is not typically used in this context; "significantly" is more appropriate for indicating the degree of benefit.
"solely dedicate their most time" -> "devote their most time"
Explanation: "Solely dedicate" is redundant; "devote" is sufficient and more concise.
"the smaller a family is, the more flexibility in finance are" -> "the smaller the family, the greater the financial flexibility"
Explanation: The original sentence is grammatically incorrect and awkward. The revision corrects the grammar and clarifies the meaning.
"the decision-making process can be more efficient and straightforward" -> "the decision-making process is often more efficient and straightforward"
Explanation: Adding "is often" provides a more accurate and formal expression, indicating a general tendency rather than a universal truth.
"the absence of extended family members can limit the social support network" -> "the absence of extended family members can restrict the social support network"
Explanation: "Limit" is too vague; "restrict" is more precise in describing the impact on the social support network.
"putting a financial pressure on the parents" -> "placing financial pressure on the parents"
Explanation: "Putting" is less formal; "placing" is more suitable for academic writing.
"the potential isolation is unconsciously suffered" -> "the potential isolation is often unconsciously experienced"
Explanation: "Suffered" is not the correct term here; "experienced" is more appropriate for describing the feeling of isolation.
"the two-generation family" -> "the nuclear family"
Explanation: "Two-generation family" is unclear and incorrect; "nuclear family" is the correct term for a family consisting of two generations.
"can offer a concentrated provision for their own children" -> "can provide concentrated care for their children"
Explanation: "Provision" is too broad and formal; "care" is more specific and appropriate in this context.
"the effortless decision-making process" -> "the streamlined decision-making process"
Explanation: "Effortless" is subjective and informal; "streamlined" is a more objective and formal term that describes the process as efficient and organized.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Task Response: 7

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of living in a nuclear family. The advantages are clearly outlined, such as focused child-rearing and efficient decision-making, while the disadvantages, including limited social support and reduced interaction opportunities, are also discussed. However, the essay could benefit from a more balanced exploration of each side, as the advantages are elaborated upon more than the disadvantages.
- How to improve: To enhance the balance between the advantages and disadvantages, the writer could provide more detailed examples or evidence for the disadvantages. For instance, elaborating on how the lack of extended family support can impact mental health or provide specific scenarios where children miss out on learning from relatives would strengthen the argument.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position that acknowledges both sides of the argument. However, the conclusion introduces some ambiguity with the phrase "In spite of the fact that while a nuclear family can offer…" which could confuse readers about the writer’s ultimate stance on the issue.
- How to improve: To maintain clarity, the writer should ensure that the conclusion succinctly summarizes their position without introducing conflicting phrases. A straightforward statement that clearly indicates whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages or vice versa would enhance the overall coherence.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: Ideas are presented and supported to a reasonable extent, with examples such as the emotional bonds fostered in a nuclear family and the efficiency of decision-making. However, some points, particularly regarding the disadvantages, lack depth and could benefit from further elaboration.
- How to improve: The writer should aim to extend their ideas by providing more in-depth analysis and examples. For instance, discussing specific scenarios where parents experience burnout or how children might miss out on learning social skills from extended family members would provide a more robust support for the claims made.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the advantages and disadvantages of nuclear families. However, there are moments where the phrasing could be clearer, such as "the concentrated provision for their own children," which could be interpreted in various ways.
- How to improve: To maintain focus, the writer should ensure that all phrases and terms used are precise and directly related to the topic. Simplifying complex phrases and avoiding ambiguous language will help keep the essay aligned with the prompt and enhance clarity.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a balanced view, but improvements in depth, clarity, and precision would elevate the score further.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs discussing advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. Each paragraph addresses a specific point, which aids in understanding. For instance, the first body paragraph effectively outlines the benefits of a nuclear family, while the second body paragraph discusses its drawbacks. However, the transition between the advantages and disadvantages could be smoother, as the shift feels somewhat abrupt.
- How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using transitional phrases that signal a shift in focus, such as "Conversely" or "On the flip side," at the beginning of the second body paragraph. Additionally, ensuring that each point is clearly linked to the overall thesis will help maintain coherence throughout the essay.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay utilizes paragraphs effectively, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct aspect of the topic. The introduction sets the stage, while the body paragraphs are dedicated to discussing the pros and cons of nuclear families. However, the conclusion could be more robust; it currently reiterates points without synthesizing them or providing a final thought that encapsulates the discussion.
- How to improve: Strengthen the conclusion by summarizing the key points made in the body paragraphs and offering a final insight or recommendation. This could involve reflecting on the implications of the advantages and disadvantages discussed, thus providing a more comprehensive closure to the essay.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs some cohesive devices, such as "On one hand" and "On the other hand," which help to distinguish between the advantages and disadvantages. However, there is a limited range of cohesive devices used throughout the essay, which can make the writing feel somewhat repetitive. For example, phrases like "this means" and "another strong point for this" could be varied to avoid redundancy.
- How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, incorporate a wider range of linking words and phrases. For instance, use "Furthermore" or "Moreover" to add information, and "In contrast" or "Nevertheless" to present opposing ideas. Additionally, consider using pronouns or synonyms to refer back to previously mentioned ideas, which can enhance cohesion and reduce repetition.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents ideas in a coherent manner. By focusing on improving transitions, enhancing the conclusion, and diversifying cohesive devices, the writer can elevate the essay to a higher band score.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 7

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary relevant to the topic of family structures. Terms such as "nuclear family," "social support networks," and "child-rearing" are appropriately used, showing an understanding of the subject matter. However, there are instances where the vocabulary could be more varied. For example, the phrase "focused nurture" could be expanded to include synonyms or related terms like "dedicated care" or "targeted upbringing" to enhance lexical diversity.
- How to improve: To improve lexical range, the writer should incorporate synonyms and related phrases throughout the essay. For instance, instead of repeating "nuclear family," they could use "two-generation family" or "immediate family" to avoid redundancy and demonstrate a broader vocabulary.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally uses vocabulary accurately, but there are instances of imprecise usage that can lead to confusion. For example, the phrase "the smaller a family is, the more flexibility in finance are" is awkward and unclear. A more precise construction would be "the smaller the family, the greater the financial flexibility," which clearly conveys the intended meaning.
- How to improve: To enhance precision, the writer should focus on sentence structure and clarity. They can practice rephrasing sentences to ensure that the vocabulary used conveys the intended message without ambiguity. Additionally, utilizing more specific terms when discussing concepts (e.g., "financial burden" instead of "financial pressure") can improve clarity.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains a few spelling errors, such as "its drawback lies in the limitation of social support networks as well as interaction chances," where "interaction chances" could be more effectively phrased as "opportunities for interaction." The spelling of individual words is generally accurate, but the phrasing can detract from the overall quality.
- How to improve: To improve spelling and phrasing, the writer should proofread their work carefully, focusing on common phrases and idiomatic expressions. Engaging in spelling exercises and reading more academic texts can also help reinforce correct spelling and usage. Additionally, utilizing tools like spell checkers or grammar checkers can assist in identifying errors before submission.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid command of vocabulary, there are opportunities for improvement in lexical range, precision, and spelling accuracy. By focusing on these areas, the writer can enhance their lexical resource and potentially achieve a higher band score in future essays.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good range of sentence structures, including complex sentences and varied clause types. For instance, phrases like "While the merits of this trend is the focused environment provided for child-rearing" and "On one hand, a nuclear family importantly benefits by providing focused nurture for their children" showcase the use of subordinate clauses and introductory phrases. However, there are instances of repetitive structures, such as starting multiple sentences with "This means" or "Another strong point for this is that," which can detract from the overall variety.
- How to improve: To enhance the diversity of sentence structures, the writer could incorporate more varied sentence openings and use different grammatical forms. For example, instead of repeatedly using "This means," the writer could use phrases like "Consequently," "As a result," or "Thus," to introduce ideas. Additionally, varying the length and complexity of sentences can create a more engaging flow. For instance, combining shorter sentences into more complex ones or using different forms of clauses can add depth to the writing.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical inaccuracies that affect clarity. For example, "the merits of this trend is" should be "the merits of this trend are" to agree in number. Additionally, "the more flexibility in finance are" is incorrect; it should be "the more flexibility there is in finance." Punctuation is generally used correctly, but there are instances where commas could enhance clarity, such as before "as well as" in the first paragraph. The use of "can not" should be corrected to "cannot" as it is typically written as a single word.
- How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of phrases. A thorough proofreading process can help catch these errors. It may also be beneficial to practice identifying common grammatical mistakes in writing. For punctuation, the writer should review rules regarding comma usage, particularly in complex sentences, to ensure clarity and fluidity. Reading the essay aloud can also help identify awkward phrasing and punctuation errors that may not be immediately obvious in written form.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid grasp of grammatical range and accuracy, attention to detail in grammar and further diversification of sentence structures could elevate the writing to a higher band score.

Bài sửa mẫu

In contemporary society, having a nuclear family has increasingly emerged as a preference for the majority of individuals. While the merits of this trend include the focused environment provided for child-rearing and a simplified decision-making process, its drawbacks lie in the limitations of social support networks as well as interaction opportunities.

On one hand, a nuclear family benefits significantly by providing concentrated care for their children. This means parents can solely devote their most time to their own children’s upbringing. When parents are always with their young ones, the emotional family bonds are strongly fostered. Additionally, the smaller the family, the greater the financial flexibility, allowing for greater investment in education, time, and healthcare. Another strong point is that the decision-making process is often more efficient and straightforward compared to that of an extended family. For example, when parents and children discuss an issue, their decision might be made effortlessly due to the reduced potential for conflict.

On the other hand, the absence of extended family members can restrict the social support network. This is illustrated by the fact that parents might be the main source of income when their children are young, placing financial pressure on them to fulfill multiple roles and leading to burnout and strained relationships as well. The lack of social interaction or exposure to various perspectives is an additional drawback of the nuclear family. When living in a small family, children have limited opportunities to socialize with other relatives or cousins. This hinders their social development, and the potential isolation is often unconsciously experienced.

To conclude, the two-generation family has played a crucial role in human life. In spite of the fact that a nuclear family can offer concentrated care for their own children and a streamlined decision-making process, its drawbacks related to limited social support networks and interaction opportunities cannot be overlooked. Hence, it is essential for individuals to contemplate and make the right decision when raising a family.