The table below gives information about the average annual distance travelled by adults and the types of travel in 1977 and 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below gives information about the average annual distance travelled by adults and the types of travel in 1977 and 2007.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

the table illustrates the information about the average annual distance traveled by adults and the types of travel in 1977 and 2007.

Overall, car, train, bus are mainly used for travelling by adults over 500 miles. The remaining group is quite low only from 100-400 miles

In 1997, cars were the most used means of transport with 3500 miles. After 10 years, cars are still popular with people and have increased to 7100 miles, showing that the demand for cars is very high throughout the period. Still keeping that increasing trend, trains and buses, people use public transport more and more to reduce the impact on the environment.

For walking, bicycles, motorbikes, taxis, although there is an increase. In particular, taxis increased 4 times after 10 years from 200-800 miles, showing a high demand for travel services. Walking, bicycles, motorbikes, buses have decreased but not significantly. Although people use public transport less, there is still a high demand. However, people still know how to use public transport to minimize the impact on the environment

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

1. "the table illustrates the information" -> "the table presents the data"
   Explanation: "Presents" is more precise and formal than "illustrates" in the context of displaying statistical information, aligning better with academic style.

2. "car, train, bus are mainly used" -> "cars, trains, and buses are primarily used"
   Explanation: Using "cars, trains, and buses" instead of "car, train, bus" corrects the grammatical structure to plural forms and adds the conjunction "and" for proper conjunction use.

3. "The remaining group is quite low only from 100-400 miles" -> "The remaining group is relatively small, ranging from 100 to 400 miles"
   Explanation: "Relatively small" is more precise and formal than "quite low," and "ranging from" is grammatically correct compared to "only from."

4. "cars were the most used means of transport" -> "cars were the most commonly used mode of transportation"
   Explanation: "Commonly used mode of transportation" is more specific and formal than "most used means of transport," and "mode of transportation" is the correct term in academic contexts.

5. "After 10 years, cars are still popular with people and have increased to 7100 miles" -> "After a decade, cars remained popular and usage increased to 7100 miles"
   Explanation: "A decade" is a more precise temporal reference than "10 years," and "remained popular and usage increased" is more formal and accurate than "are still popular and have increased."

6. "Still keeping that increasing trend" -> "Continuing this trend"
   Explanation: "Continuing this trend" is more concise and academically appropriate than "Still keeping that increasing trend," which is awkwardly phrased.

7. "people use public transport more and more to reduce the impact on the environment" -> "public transportation usage increased to mitigate environmental impact"
   Explanation: "Public transportation usage increased to mitigate environmental impact" is more formal and precise, avoiding the informal repetition of "more and more."

8. "although there is an increase" -> "although there was an increase"
   Explanation: "Was" is the correct past tense for referring to a completed action in the past, aligning with the context of 1997 and 2007.

9. "showing a high demand for travel services" -> "indicating a significant demand for travel services"
   Explanation: "Indicating" is more precise and formal than "showing," and "significant" is a more academic term than "high."

10. "Walking, bicycles, motorbikes, buses have decreased but not significantly" -> "Walking, cycling, motorcycling, and bus usage decreased, albeit not significantly"
    Explanation: "Cycling, motorcycling, and bus usage" corrects the plural forms and uses "usage" for consistency. "Albeit" is a more formal conjunction than "but."

11. "people still know how to use public transport to minimize the impact on the environment" -> "individuals still recognize the importance of using public transportation to reduce environmental impact"
    Explanation: "Individuals" and "recognize the importance of using public transportation to reduce environmental impact" are more formal and precise, enhancing the academic tone of the statement.

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5

Explanation: The essay attempts to address the task by providing an overview of the information in the table. However, the overview is not clear and the essay does not adequately highlight the key features of the data. For example, the essay states that "cars are still popular with people and have increased to 7100 miles" but does not provide any specific information about the increase in car use. The essay also makes some inaccurate statements, such as "taxis increased 4 times after 10 years from 200-800 miles". This statement is not supported by the data in the table.

How to improve: The essay could be improved by providing a clearer overview of the data and by highlighting the key features of the table. The essay should also be more accurate in its presentation of the data. For example, the essay could state that "car use increased by 100% between 1997 and 2007" instead of saying that "cars are still popular with people and have increased to 7100 miles". The essay should also avoid making subjective statements, such as "people use public transport more and more to reduce the impact on the environment". Instead, the essay should focus on presenting the data in a factual and objective manner.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5.0
Explanation: The essay presents information with some organization, but there is a lack of overall progression. While it attempts to summarize the data from the table, the ideas are not clearly connected, and the use of cohesive devices is inadequate and sometimes repetitive. The paragraphing is present but not always logical, leading to confusion in the flow of information. The central topics within paragraphs are not clearly defined, which affects the coherence of the essay.
How to improve: To enhance coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on logically organizing the information and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear central topic. Using a wider range of cohesive devices appropriately will help connect ideas more effectively. Additionally, improving the clarity of referencing and substitution can reduce repetition and enhance the overall flow of the essay.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5.0
Explanation: The essay demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary, which is minimally adequate for the task. While it attempts to convey the information from the table, the vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. For example, phrases like "the remaining group is quite low" and "showing that the demand for cars is very high throughout the period" lack precision and clarity. Additionally, there are noticeable errors in spelling and word formation, such as "In 1997" instead of "In 1977," which may cause some difficulty for the reader. Overall, the lexical resource does not meet the criteria for higher bands due to its limitations in variety and accuracy.

How to improve: To enhance the lexical resource score, the writer should aim to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary, including less common lexical items, and ensure precise word choice. Practicing the use of synonyms and varying sentence structures can help avoid repetition. Additionally, focusing on accuracy in spelling and word formation is crucial. Engaging with more complex texts and practicing paraphrasing can also aid in developing a more sophisticated vocabulary.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5.0
Explanation: The essay demonstrates a limited range of grammatical structures and attempts to use complex sentences, but these attempts are often inaccurate. There are frequent grammatical errors, particularly in verb tenses and subject-verb agreement, which can cause some difficulty for the reader. For example, phrases like "cars are still popular with people" should be in the past tense to maintain consistency with the time frame discussed. Additionally, punctuation errors are present, such as missing commas, which further detracts from clarity. Overall, while the essay conveys some information, the grammatical inaccuracies hinder effective communication.

How to improve: To enhance the grammatical range and accuracy, the writer should focus on the following strategies:

1. Practice using a variety of sentence structures: Incorporate more complex sentences and ensure they are grammatically correct.
2. Review verb tenses: Ensure that the tense used is consistent throughout the essay, especially when discussing data from specific years.
3. Proofread for grammatical errors: Take time to check for common mistakes, such as subject-verb agreement and punctuation.
4. Expand vocabulary: Use a wider range of vocabulary to express ideas more clearly and accurately, which can help in constructing more complex sentences.
5. Seek feedback: Getting feedback from peers or instructors can help identify recurring errors and areas for improvement.

Bài sửa mẫu

The table illustrates the average annual distance traveled by adults and the types of travel in 1977 and 2007.

Overall, cars, trains, and buses are the primary means of transport for adults traveling over 500 miles. The remaining categories show relatively low usage, ranging from 100 to 400 miles.

In 1977, cars were the most commonly used means of transport, with an average distance of 3,500 miles. After 30 years, cars remained popular, increasing to 7,100 miles, indicating a high demand for car travel throughout the period. Following this increasing trend, the use of trains and buses also rose, as people increasingly opted for public transport to reduce their environmental impact.

In contrast, while there was an increase in the use of walking, bicycles, motorbikes, and taxis, the growth was notable for taxis, which quadrupled from 200 miles to 800 miles over the decade. This indicates a significant demand for taxi services. Although walking, bicycles, motorbikes, and buses saw a slight decrease, it was not substantial. Despite a reduction in public transport usage, there remains a strong demand for these services, as people continue to utilize public transport to minimize their environmental footprint.