We are producing more and more rubbish. Why do you think this is happening? What can governments do to help reduce the amount of rubbish produced?

We are producing more and more rubbish. Why do you think this is happening? What can governments do to help reduce the amount of rubbish produced?

Nowadays, pollution is becoming a serious problem in many countries. One reason for that is the production of excessive waste generation. This essay will look at some primary causes of this and offer some possible solutions to the problem.
There are several reasons for the rising amount of rubbish. The first reason is the increase in industrial waste. Nowadays, many nations are entering the process of industrialization, causing the number of factories and companies to grow significantly, leading to an increase in emissions, sewage, and industrial waste discharged into the environment. Another reason is the growth of household waste. Primarily, with an increasing population, more trash is created by people as they have so many demands for their daily living routines. As a consequence, the quantity of rubbish rises rapidly.
In my opinion, this trend has caused adverse impacts and the government ought to take action to resolve this problem. Firstly, it is important for the government to impose regulations about the limitation of emissions in the process of production for factories and companies. Secondly, the government should encourage the use of renewable energy instead of fossil fuels. Finally, it is crucial for authorities to improve public awareness about reusing and recycling rubbish. By implementing the above solutions, the pollution of the environment can be resolved effectively.
In conclusion, there are various factors leading to the growth of trash, and measures can be implemented to tackle this issue.


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

  1. "Nowadays" -> "Currently"
    Explanation: "Currently" is a more formal and precise temporal indicator suitable for academic writing, replacing the colloquial "Nowadays."

  2. "serious problem" -> "significant issue"
    Explanation: "Significant issue" is a more formal and precise term that enhances the academic tone, replacing the less formal "serious problem."

  3. "excessive waste generation" -> "excessive waste production"
    Explanation: "Production" is more specific and accurate in this context, referring to the creation of waste, whereas "generation" could imply a broader, more general process.

  4. "look at some primary causes of this" -> "examine several key factors contributing to this"
    Explanation: "Examine" is more formal and precise than "look at," and "key factors contributing to" is a more specific and academic way to describe the causes.

  5. "offer some possible solutions to the problem" -> "propose several potential solutions to address the issue"
    Explanation: "Propose" and "potential solutions" are more formal and precise, and "address the issue" is a clearer and more academic way to describe the purpose of the solutions.

  6. "the increase in industrial waste" -> "the rise in industrial waste"
    Explanation: "Rise" is a more formal synonym for "increase," fitting better in academic writing.

  7. "Nowadays, many nations are entering the process of industrialization" -> "Currently, numerous countries are undergoing industrialization"
    Explanation: "Currently" is more formal than "Nowadays," and "undergoing" is a more precise verb than "entering," which is less commonly used in this context.

  8. "the number of factories and companies to grow significantly" -> "the number of factories and companies significantly increasing"
    Explanation: This revision clarifies the subject-verb agreement and enhances the formality of the sentence.

  9. "growth of household waste" -> "increase in household waste"
    Explanation: "Increase" is a more commonly used term in academic contexts to describe the rise in quantity, making it more suitable than "growth."

  10. "have so many demands for their daily living routines" -> "have numerous demands for their daily living needs"
    Explanation: "Needs" is a more precise term than "routines," which is too informal and vague for academic writing.

  11. "the quantity of rubbish rises rapidly" -> "the quantity of waste increases rapidly"
    Explanation: "Waste" is a more formal and precise term than "rubbish," which is colloquial.

  12. "the government ought to take action" -> "the government should implement measures"
    Explanation: "Implement measures" is a more formal and specific action-oriented phrase than "take action," which is somewhat vague.

  13. "impose regulations about the limitation of emissions" -> "enact regulations to limit emissions"
    Explanation: "Enact" is more formal and precise than "impose," and "to limit" is a clearer and more direct phrase than "about the limitation of."

  14. "encourage the use of renewable energy instead of fossil fuels" -> "promote the adoption of renewable energy over fossil fuels"
    Explanation: "Promote the adoption" is a more formal and precise way to describe the encouragement of change, and "over" is more specific than "instead of."

  15. "improve public awareness about reusing and recycling rubbish" -> "enhance public awareness regarding the reuse and recycling of waste"
    Explanation: "Enhance" is more formal than "improve," and "regarding the reuse and recycling of waste" is more precise and formal than "about reusing and recycling rubbish."

These changes aim to refine the vocabulary and style of the essay to better align with academic standards, ensuring clarity, precision, and formality.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Task Response: 5 – UNDER WORD

  • Answer All Parts of the Question:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay partially addresses the prompt by identifying reasons for the increase in rubbish and suggesting some solutions. However, it does not fully explore the second part of the question regarding what governments can do to help reduce rubbish. For instance, while it mentions regulations and public awareness, it lacks depth in discussing specific policies or initiatives that could be implemented.
    • How to improve: To comprehensively address all elements of the question, the essay should include more detailed examples of government actions, such as specific laws, incentives for recycling, or educational campaigns. Additionally, a clearer connection between the causes of rubbish and the proposed solutions would strengthen the response.
  • Present a Clear Position Throughout:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a general opinion that the government should take action against rubbish production, but this position is not consistently reinforced throughout. The shift from discussing causes to solutions is abrupt and could confuse the reader about the author’s stance.
    • How to improve: To maintain a clear and consistent position, the essay should use transitional phrases to link ideas and reinforce the argument. For example, reiterating the importance of government action in each paragraph would help solidify the author’s viewpoint.
  • Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents some ideas regarding the causes of rubbish and potential solutions, but these ideas are not sufficiently developed or supported. The mention of "industrial waste" and "household waste" lacks specific examples or statistics that could enhance the argument. Additionally, the solutions proposed are somewhat vague and lack elaboration.
    • How to improve: To effectively present and extend ideas, the essay should include specific examples, such as statistics on waste production or case studies of successful government initiatives. Each solution should be elaborated upon, explaining how it would work and its potential impact on reducing rubbish.
  • Stay on Topic:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, discussing rubbish production and potential government interventions. However, the introduction’s mention of "pollution" could be seen as a slight deviation from the main focus on rubbish, which may confuse the reader about the central theme.
    • How to improve: To maintain focus and relevance, the essay should ensure that all parts of the introduction and body paragraphs directly relate to rubbish production and government action. Avoiding broader terms like "pollution" unless directly linked to rubbish will help keep the essay on topic.

In summary, to improve the essay and potentially raise the band score, the writer should ensure all parts of the prompt are thoroughly addressed, maintain a clear and consistent position, develop and support ideas with specific examples, and stay focused on the topic throughout the essay.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 8

  • Organize Information Logically:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear logical structure, beginning with an introduction that outlines the topic and the writer’s intent. The body paragraphs are organized to first discuss the causes of rubbish production, followed by proposed solutions. This sequential arrangement aids in understanding the relationship between causes and solutions. For instance, the transition from discussing industrial waste to household waste is smooth, maintaining a coherent flow of ideas.
    • How to improve: To enhance logical organization, consider using more explicit linking phrases between sections. For example, after discussing industrial waste, a transitional phrase like "In addition to industrial waste, another significant contributor is…" could further clarify the connection between ideas. Additionally, ensuring that each paragraph directly relates back to the thesis can strengthen the overall coherence.
  • Use Paragraphs:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the topic. The introduction sets the stage, the body paragraphs delve into causes and solutions, and the conclusion summarizes the discussion. However, the second body paragraph could benefit from clearer topic sentences that explicitly state the main idea of each paragraph.
    • How to improve: To improve paragraph structure, ensure that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that encapsulates the main idea. For example, the paragraph discussing household waste could start with a sentence like, "Household waste is another significant contributor to the increasing rubbish problem." This would provide a clearer focus for the reader.
  • Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay employs a variety of cohesive devices, such as "Firstly," "Secondly," and "Finally," to sequence ideas effectively. Additionally, phrases like "As a consequence" help to establish cause-and-effect relationships. However, the essay could benefit from a broader range of cohesive devices to enhance fluency and coherence.
    • How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, consider incorporating synonyms or alternative phrases. For example, instead of repeatedly using "the government should," variations like "it is essential for authorities to" or "policymakers ought to" can add variety. Additionally, using more complex cohesive devices, such as "in light of" or "consequently," can enrich the text and improve the overall flow.

By addressing these areas for improvement, the essay can achieve an even higher level of coherence and cohesion, further enhancing its effectiveness in conveying ideas.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

  • Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, particularly in discussing the causes of rubbish production and potential solutions. Words like "industrialization," "emissions," "sewage," and "renewable energy" indicate a solid understanding of relevant terminology. However, the vocabulary used is somewhat repetitive, particularly in phrases like "increase in industrial waste" and "growth of household waste," which could be varied for greater impact.
    • How to improve: To enhance lexical range, the writer could incorporate synonyms or related terms. For instance, instead of repeatedly using "increase," alternatives like "surge," "escalation," or "rise" could be employed. Additionally, using more descriptive adjectives (e.g., "excessive" could be replaced with "overwhelming" or "unmanageable") would enrich the vocabulary.
  • Use Vocabulary Precisely:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally uses vocabulary accurately, but there are instances of vague phrasing. For example, "the quantity of rubbish rises rapidly" could be more specific; what constitutes "rapidly" is subjective and could be quantified or described more vividly. Additionally, phrases like "demands for their daily living routines" could be clearer; "needs" or "requirements" might convey the intended meaning more effectively.
    • How to improve: The writer should focus on clarity and specificity in word choice. Instead of using broad terms, they could provide more context or detail. For instance, rather than saying "adverse impacts," specifying the types of impacts (e.g., "environmental degradation" or "health risks") would enhance precision.
  • Use Correct Spelling:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay displays a strong command of spelling, with no noticeable errors present. Words such as "pollution," "excessive," "government," and "awareness" are spelled correctly, reflecting a good level of accuracy in this area.
    • How to improve: While the spelling is accurate, the writer should continue to practice spelling through reading and writing exercises. Utilizing tools such as spell checkers or engaging in vocabulary quizzes can further solidify spelling skills. Additionally, reviewing commonly misspelled words in English could be beneficial.

In summary, while the essay meets the criteria for a Band 6 in Lexical Resource, improvements can be made in vocabulary range and precision. By diversifying word choice and enhancing clarity, the writer can elevate their lexical performance in future essays.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

  • Use a Wide Range of Structures:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good variety of sentence structures, including simple, compound, and complex sentences. For instance, the use of clauses such as "causing the number of factories and companies to grow significantly" showcases an ability to create more intricate sentence forms. However, there are instances where the sentence structures are somewhat repetitive, particularly in the way ideas are introduced (e.g., "The first reason is…" and "Another reason is…"). This pattern can detract from the overall fluency and engagement of the writing.
    • How to improve: To diversify sentence structures, consider using more varied introductory phrases or transition words. For example, instead of consistently starting with "The first reason is…" you could use phrases like "One contributing factor is…" or "Additionally, another significant factor is…". Incorporating more conditional sentences or participial phrases could also enhance the complexity and richness of the writing.
  • Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally maintains a good level of grammatical accuracy, with only a few minor errors. For instance, the phrase "the production of excessive waste generation" is somewhat redundant; "excessive waste" alone suffices. Additionally, punctuation is mostly correct, but there are a couple of run-on sentences that could benefit from clearer separation. For example, "leading to an increase in emissions, sewage, and industrial waste discharged into the environment" could be restructured for clarity.
    • How to improve: Focus on eliminating redundancy in word choice to enhance clarity. Additionally, pay attention to sentence boundaries; using conjunctions or breaking longer sentences into shorter ones can improve readability. For instance, consider revising "the government ought to take action to resolve this problem" to "the government must take action to address this issue." This not only clarifies the statement but also strengthens the argument.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid command of grammatical range and accuracy, there is room for improvement in diversifying sentence structures and refining grammatical precision. By implementing these suggestions, the overall quality and effectiveness of the writing can be significantly enhanced.

Bài sửa mẫu

**Improved Essay:**

Currently, pollution is becoming a significant issue in many countries. One reason for this is the production of excessive waste generation. This essay will examine several key factors contributing to this problem and propose several potential solutions to address it.

There are several reasons for the rising amount of rubbish. The first reason is the rise in industrial waste. Currently, numerous countries are undergoing industrialization, causing the number of factories and companies to increase significantly. This growth leads to a rise in emissions, sewage, and industrial waste discharged into the environment. Another reason is the increase in household waste. Primarily, with a growing population, more trash is created as people have numerous demands for their daily living needs. As a consequence, the quantity of waste increases rapidly.

In my opinion, this trend has caused adverse impacts, and the government should take action to resolve this issue. Firstly, it is important for the government to enact regulations to limit emissions during the production processes of factories and companies. Secondly, the government should promote the adoption of renewable energy over fossil fuels. Finally, it is crucial for authorities to enhance public awareness regarding the reuse and recycling of waste. By implementing these solutions, the pollution of the environment can be effectively addressed.

In conclusion, there are various factors leading to the growth of rubbish, and measures can be implemented to tackle this issue.

Bài viết liên quan

These days,students attend private “cram schools” for extra coaching to make them study better,so that a lot of parents believe they should just let their child go to “cram school” to learn better.But other people believe that students can learn by their own way so they can also do well in the test.

These days,students attend private “cram schools” for extra coaching to make them study better,so that a lot of parents believe they should just let their…

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more…

IELTS Writify

Chấm IELTS Writing Free x GPT

Lưu ý

Sắp bảo trì server

Để đảm bảo tính ổn định của web, web sẽ thực hiện backup dữ liệu hàng ngày từ 3h-3h30 sáng

Rất mong quý thầy cô và học viên thông cảm vì bất tiện này