the last time you had a special meal

the last time you had a special meal

The last special meal I had was a warm dinner with my zamily 3 month ago. It took place at home on a special occasion their 30th wedding anniversary. All of sis, including my parents, siblings and I ; I, enjoyed the warm and happy family atmosphere togethere. We had a salad to start. Then we had chicken curry and coconut steamed shrimp for main course. At the end of the party there was also delicious butter pudding. Not only do we eat delicious food It together, agerber's my my family jamily alre also chats & happily. It was a Speical meaningful and dinner that I will remenber of my life

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

1. "zamily" -> "family"
   Explanation: "Zamily" is likely a typo or a colloquial variation of "family." Using "family" instead maintains formality and clarity in academic writing.

2. "3 month ago" -> "three months ago"
   Explanation: "3 month ago" lacks proper grammatical structure and should be written as "three months ago" to adhere to standard conventions.

3. "sis" -> "we all"
   Explanation: "Sis" is too informal for academic writing. Replacing it with "we all" maintains clarity and formality.

4. "togethere" -> "together"
   Explanation: "Togethere" is a misspelling of "together." Correcting it ensures proper spelling and readability.

5. "Agerber’s" -> "Additionally"
   Explanation: "Agerber’s" appears to be a typographical error or an informal expression. Replacing it with "Additionally" improves clarity and formality.

6. "my my family jamily alre also chats & happily" -> "my family also engages in cheerful conversation"
   Explanation: The original phrase is informal and lacks clarity. Revising it to "my family also engages in cheerful conversation" maintains formality and readability.

7. "Speical" -> "Special"
   Explanation: "Speical" is a misspelling of "Special." Correcting it ensures proper spelling and maintains professionalism in academic writing.

8. "remenber" -> "remember"
   Explanation: "Remenber" is a misspelling of "remember." Correcting it ensures proper spelling and readability.

9. "of my life" -> "for a lifetime"
   Explanation: "Of my life" is slightly awkward in this context. Replacing it with "for a lifetime" enhances clarity and elegance.

Overall, these changes enhance the clarity, formality, and readability of the text, making it more suitable for academic writing.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 4

Band Score for Task Response: 4 – UNDER WORD

• Answer All Parts of the Question:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay partially addresses the prompt by describing the last special meal the writer had, which was a warm dinner celebrating their family’s 30th wedding anniversary. However, it lacks depth in addressing all aspects of the prompt, such as the significance of the meal or any personal reflections on the experience.
  • How to improve: To enhance the response, consider delving deeper into the significance of the meal and its impact on the writer. Reflect on why it was special beyond just the occasion, perhaps focusing on familial bonds or cultural traditions associated with such gatherings.

• Present a Clear Position Throughout:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a somewhat clear position by narrating the experience of the special meal with family. However, there are instances of unclear expression and grammatical errors that may slightly obfuscate the writer’s stance.
  • How to improve: Ensure clarity in expression and coherence in the narrative. Simplify complex sentences and proofread for grammatical accuracy to strengthen the clarity of the writer’s position throughout the essay.

• Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay presents basic ideas about the meal and the family gathering but lacks development and support. There is limited elaboration on the significance of the meal or the emotions associated with it.
  • How to improve: Expand on the details of the meal and the atmosphere, describing sensory experiences and emotional connections. Additionally, provide anecdotes or specific examples to support the ideas presented, adding depth and richness to the narrative.

• Stay on Topic:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay mostly stays on topic by describing the special meal and the family gathering. However, there are instances of tangential remarks or unclear statements that slightly detract from the coherence.
  • How to improve: Focus on maintaining a clear narrative thread centered on the special meal experience. Avoid digressions and ensure that every point contributes directly to the main topic, enhancing the overall coherence of the essay.

In summary, while the essay provides a glimpse into the writer’s experience of a special family meal, there is room for improvement in addressing all aspects of the prompt, maintaining clarity and coherence, developing ideas with sufficient depth, and staying strictly on topic. By refining these areas, the essay can achieve a higher band score for task response.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 4

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 4

• Organize Information Logically:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay exhibits some logical organization by discussing the event sequentially—starting with the occasion, then describing the meal course by course, and concluding with reflections. However, the lack of clear transitions between ideas affects the overall coherence. For instance, the shift from describing the meal items to the atmosphere of the gathering could be smoother and more connected.
  • How to improve: To enhance logical flow, use transition words or phrases to connect ideas more effectively. For example, phrases like "Following the appetizer" or "In addition to the delightful food" can help guide the reader through the essay’s progression.

• Use Paragraphs:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay lacks clear paragraph structure, resulting in a single, lengthy block of text. This absence of paragraph breaks makes it challenging for the reader to follow the different stages of the meal and associated emotions. Effective paragraphing could significantly improve readability and clarity.
  • How to improve: Break the essay into distinct paragraphs, each focusing on a specific aspect (e.g., the occasion, the meal details, the family atmosphere). This will help organize ideas and make the content more digestible.

• Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay employs basic cohesive devices (e.g., "then," "at the end," "not only…but also"), but their usage is inconsistent and not fully exploited. This leads to abrupt shifts between ideas and a lack of smooth transitions.
  • How to improve: Increase the variety and frequency of cohesive devices throughout the essay. Utilize a mix of conjunctions, pronouns, and transitional phrases (e.g., "as a result," "in addition," "furthermore") to link sentences and ideas more cohesively. Practice using these devices to create a more seamless narrative flow.

Overall, while the essay effectively conveys the details of the special meal and the significance of the occasion, enhancing coherence and cohesion would greatly strengthen its impact. Focus on implementing clearer organization, employing proper paragraphing techniques, and refining the use of cohesive devices to achieve a more polished and cohesive piece of writing.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 5

• Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a moderate range of vocabulary, incorporating some descriptive words such as "warm," "happy," "delicious," "meaningful," and "remember." However, there is room for improvement in diversifying the vocabulary further to enhance the richness of expression. For instance, instead of repeatedly using "warm," "happy," and "delicious," consider synonyms or more vivid descriptors to paint a clearer picture for the reader.
  • How to improve: To broaden your vocabulary range, try incorporating synonyms and exploring different ways to express your ideas. For example, instead of "warm," you could use "inviting," "cosy," or "heartwarming." Similarly, instead of "happy," you could use "joyous," "blissful," or "celebratory." Consulting a thesaurus or reading more diverse texts can help you discover new words and phrases to enhance your writing.

• Use Vocabulary Precisely:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay displays imprecise vocabulary usage in several instances. For example, "zamily" instead of "family," "sis" instead of "siblings," and "agerber’s" instead of "together." Additionally, there are grammatical errors such as "my jamily alre also chats" which disrupt the flow of the sentence. These inaccuracies hinder the clarity and coherence of the essay.
  • How to improve: Focus on using vocabulary accurately and appropriately. Instead of using slang or informal language like "sis" and "zamily," opt for standard English terms such as "siblings" and "family." Proofreading your work carefully can help catch grammatical errors and ensure clarity in your writing. It’s also beneficial to practice writing in formal contexts to become more proficient in using precise vocabulary.

• Use Correct Spelling:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay contains several spelling errors, such as "zamily" instead of "family," "togethere" instead of "together," and "Speical" instead of "Special." These errors detract from the overall quality of the writing and may affect the reader’s comprehension.
  • How to improve: To improve spelling accuracy, consider using spell-check tools or software to identify and correct errors. Additionally, reviewing commonly misspelled words and practicing spelling exercises can help reinforce correct spelling patterns. Taking the time to proofread your writing carefully before submission is essential to catch and rectify any spelling mistakes.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 5

• Use a Wide Range of Structures:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a basic range of sentence structures, including simple sentences and compound sentences. However, there is a lack of complex or varied sentence structures, which limits the sophistication of the writing. For example, the essay predominantly uses simple sentences like "We had a salad to start" and "Then we had chicken curry." There is also a tendency to repeat similar structures, such as "Not only do we eat delicious food together, agerber’s my my family jamily alre also chats & happily," which lacks clarity and coherence.
  • How to improve: To enhance the grammatical range and variety of structures, it would be beneficial to incorporate more complex sentence structures such as compound-complex sentences and use a variety of sentence beginnings. Additionally, transitioning between ideas more smoothly and avoiding repetitive structures will improve the overall coherence and flow of the essay.

• Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors and punctuation inaccuracies that impact clarity and readability. For instance, there are errors in subject-verb agreement ("All of sis, including my parents, siblings and I"), incorrect verb tense usage ("It took place at home on a special occasion their 30th wedding anniversary"), and misspellings ("zamily" instead of "family"). Punctuation errors include missing commas, such as after introductory phrases ("At the end of the party there was also delicious butter pudding"), and inconsistent capitalization ("Speical" instead of "Special").
  • How to improve: To enhance grammatical accuracy, it’s important to pay attention to subject-verb agreement, verb tense consistency, and word choice. Proofreading carefully for spelling errors and ensuring proper punctuation usage, including commas, periods, and capitalization, will improve the overall clarity and coherence of the essay. Additionally, practicing sentence structure variations and seeking feedback on writing can help in identifying and correcting grammatical errors.

Bài sửa mẫu

The most recent memorable meal I experienced was a cozy dinner with my family three months ago. This special occasion took place at home, celebrating my parents’ 30th wedding anniversary. All of us, including my parents, siblings, and I, cherished the warm and joyful family atmosphere together. To begin, we enjoyed a fresh salad, followed by flavorful chicken curry and coconut steamed shrimp as the main course. To conclude the meal, we savored delicious butter pudding. Additionally, not only did we share delectable food, but my family also engaged in cheerful conversation throughout the evening. This meal was truly special and meaningful, a memory I will treasure for a lifetime.