The first chart below shows the number of British visitors to the US and American visitors to the UK from 2011 to 2015. The second chart shows the spent by those visitors in that period. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The first graph shows the number of British tourists to US and American tourists to UK, and the second one indicates their expenditure on travel, from 2011 to 2015. Overall, it is clear that the volume of both visitors and their payments had the trend of increasing. Also noticeable was that the number of tourists and the amount spent of the British was considerably higher than that of the American. Looking at the graph more closely, one can see that around 3200 people visited the US in 2011, then fell slightly to 2800 in 2013. From 2013, British travelers witnessed steady growth to the highest point of 3500 visitors in 2015. In addition, the amount of money paid for traveling of the UK grew gradually from 3900 USD in 2011 to 5600 USD in 2015. For US tourists to UK, there was relatively no change between 2011 and 2012. Subsequently, the figures of American travelers went down to 2500 in 2013. In the next 3 years, it increased constantly to 3200 in 2015. There were some slight shifts in their payments which went up and down 2 times from 2011 to 2013. Then, it ascended steadily to 4000 USD in 2015.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"The first graph shows" -> "The first graph illustrates"
Explanation: "Illustrates" is a more precise and formal term than "shows," which is more commonly used in academic writing to describe the presentation of data.
"British tourists to US and American tourists to UK" -> "British tourists to the United States and American tourists to the United Kingdom"
Explanation: Using the full names of countries (United States and United Kingdom) enhances formality and clarity, especially in an academic context.
"had the trend of increasing" -> "trended upward"
Explanation: "Trended upward" is a more concise and academically appropriate way to describe the direction of increasing data.
"the amount spent of the British" -> "the expenditures of British tourists"
Explanation: "The expenditures of British tourists" is grammatically correct and more formal than the original phrase, which is awkward and unclear.
"Looking at the graph more closely" -> "Upon closer examination of the graph"
Explanation: "Upon closer examination" is a more formal and precise way to introduce a detailed analysis of the data.
"British travelers witnessed steady growth" -> "British tourist numbers experienced steady growth"
Explanation: "British tourist numbers" is a more specific and formal way to refer to the data, improving clarity and precision.
"the amount of money paid for traveling of the UK" -> "the expenditures of UK tourists"
Explanation: "The expenditures of UK tourists" is grammatically correct and more formal than the original phrase, which is awkward and unclear.
"there was relatively no change" -> "there was little change"
Explanation: "Little change" is a more precise and academically appropriate way to describe minimal variation in data.
"went down to 2500" -> "decreased to 2500"
Explanation: "Decreased" is a more formal and precise term than "went down," which is too colloquial for academic writing.
"it increased constantly" -> "it consistently increased"
Explanation: "Consistently increased" is a more formal and precise term, suitable for academic analysis of trends.
"there were some slight shifts" -> "there were minor fluctuations"
Explanation: "Minor fluctuations" is a more formal and precise term than "some slight shifts," which is somewhat vague and informal.
"went up and down 2 times" -> "fluctuated twice"
Explanation: "Fluctuated twice" is a more formal and precise way to describe repeated changes in data, avoiding the informal tone of "went up and down."
"ascended steadily" -> "steadily increased"
Explanation: "Steadily increased" is a more commonly accepted phrase in academic writing, enhancing the formality and clarity of the description.

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation: The essay provides an overview of the main features of the charts, but it does not fully extend the key features. For example, the essay states that the number of British tourists to the US increased from 2013 to 2015, but it does not provide any specific figures to support this claim. The essay also does not make any comparisons between the two charts, which is a requirement of the task.

How to improve: The essay could be improved by providing more specific details about the key features of the charts. For example, the essay could state that the number of British tourists to the US increased from 2800 in 2013 to 3500 in 2015. The essay could also make comparisons between the two charts, such as noting that the number of British tourists to the US was consistently higher than the number of American tourists to the UK.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation:
The essay demonstrates a reasonable level of coherence and cohesion. It organizes information in a generally clear manner, with a noticeable progression through the years for both sets of data. Each paragraph focuses on either British visitors or American visitors, with a central topic presented clearly. The essay uses cohesive devices effectively to link sentences within paragraphs, though there are some instances where cohesion could be improved, such as in transitions between paragraphs or within sentences.

Paragraphing is used, but not always logically; for instance, the transition between discussing British visitors and American visitors could be smoother. Overall, while there is a clear attempt to organize ideas coherently and present a logical progression of information, some aspects of cohesion within and between sentences could be refined for greater clarity.

How to improve:

Paragraph Structure: Ensure that each paragraph addresses a single clear aspect related to either British or American visitors, avoiding mixed discussions.
Cohesive Devices: Use more varied cohesive devices (e.g., pronouns, conjunctions) to improve flow and coherence, especially in transitions between sentences and paragraphs.
Logical Progression: Pay attention to the logical flow of ideas, ensuring that the relationship between different pieces of information is clear and explicit.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates a basic range of vocabulary, sufficient to convey the main points of the task. It uses some appropriate terminology related to tourism and expenditure, such as "British tourists," "American travelers," "expenditure," "visitors," "steady growth," "highest point," and "ascended steadily." However, the vocabulary is somewhat repetitive and lacks variety, relying heavily on basic words and phrases ("shows," "overall," "clear," "noticable," "around," "went up and down," "went down," etc.). There are noticeable errors in word choice and collocation ("witnessed steady growth to the highest point," "ascended steadily," "paid for traveling of the UK," "there was relatively no change").

How to improve: To improve lexical resource:

Variety: Use a wider range of vocabulary to avoid repetition and enhance precision in conveying ideas.
Accuracy: Pay attention to word choice and collocation to ensure the correct use of terms and phrases.
Complexity: Introduce more sophisticated lexical items and structures to demonstrate a higher level of lexical resource.

Overall, while the essay conveys the main features of the charts adequately, it could benefit from more varied and precise vocabulary to improve coherence and accuracy in conveying the information.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5.0

Explanation:
The essay demonstrates an attempt to use a variety of sentence structures, including simple and some complex forms ("from 2011 to 2015", "considerably higher than that of the American", "around 3200 people visited the US"). However, there are frequent grammatical errors and inaccuracies throughout the text that affect clarity and precision. Examples include missing articles ("from 2013, British travelers witnessed steady growth"), incorrect verb forms ("the amount of money paid for traveling of the UK"), and awkward phrasing ("there were some slight shifts in their payments which went up and down 2 times").

How to improve:
To improve the grammatical range and accuracy:

Focus on using correct verb tenses consistently throughout the essay.
Pay attention to article usage (e.g., "the amount of money paid for travel in the UK").
Review sentence structure to ensure clarity and accuracy, especially when using complex sentences.
Practice using punctuation correctly to enhance readability and coherence.

Improving these areas will help to reduce grammatical errors and increase the overall clarity and coherence of the essay, potentially achieving a higher band score.

Bài sửa mẫu

The provided IELTS Task 1 report can be refined with attention to grammar, structure, and clarity while preserving the original data and vocabulary. Here’s the improved version:

The first graph illustrates the number of British tourists visiting the US and American tourists visiting the UK, while the second graph outlines their expenditure on travel from 2011 to 2015. Overall, both visitor numbers and spending showed an upward trend.

Initially, around 3200 British tourists visited the US in 2011, with a slight decrease to 2800 in 2013. Thereafter, the numbers steadily increased, reaching a peak of 3500 visitors in 2015. Conversely, American tourists visiting the UK remained stable at approximately 2500 in 2011 and 2012, before dropping to 2300 in 2013. From then on, the numbers steadily rose, reaching 3200 visitors by 2015.

Regarding expenditure, British tourists’ spending increased steadily from $3900 in 2011 to $5600 in 2015. In contrast, American tourists’ spending fluctuated between $3800 and $4000 from 2011 to 2013, before rising steadily to $4000 by 2015.

This revision maintains the original data points and structure while enhancing clarity and coherence, aligning with the requirements and expectations of the IELTS Task 1 writing assessment.