The chart below shows the percentage of favorite movie genres in Taiwan and Canada Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The accompanying illustrations have given information about prefers movie genres in Taiwan and Canada in 2007.
Overall, one of the most remarkable features were Action and Romance genres in Taiwan had the highest ratio. However, sci-fi genres was the least favorite by both in Taiwan and Canada.
Looking at the diagram, in Taiwan, The proportion of Action genres and Romance genres have equivalent data of 30%. Moreover, Comedy movies accounted of the highest percentage of total 25% than Drama movies and Sci-fi movies did, and the figures were 10% and 5% respectively.
In particular, The proportion of Action genres was far higher than of Romance genres with respective figures being 57% and 30% in Canada. In addition, 25% was the share of Drama movies which was lower than Action movies was 75%. Finally, the number of Sci-fi movies showed have figures equivalents to Comedy movies was 5%.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"The accompanying illustrations have given information about prefers movie genres" -> "The accompanying illustrations provide information about preferred movie genres"
Explanation: "Provide" is more appropriate than "have given" in this context, as it is more direct and formal. Additionally, "preferred" is the correct form of the adjective to describe the genres, not "prefers," which is a verb.
"one of the most remarkable features were Action and Romance genres" -> "one of the most notable features was the prominence of Action and Romance genres"
Explanation: "Was" is the correct verb form to match the singular subject "feature," and "prominence" is a more precise term than "remarkable features" to describe the relative importance of the genres.
"sci-fi genres was the least favorite" -> "sci-fi genres were the least favored"
Explanation: "Were" agrees with the plural subject "genres," and "least favored" is grammatically correct and more formal than "least favorite."
"The proportion of Action genres and Romance genres have equivalent data of 30%" -> "The proportions of Action and Romance genres were equivalent at 30%"
Explanation: "Were" is the correct verb form for the plural subject "proportions," and "equivalent at" is a more precise and formal way to describe the similarity in percentages.
"Comedy movies accounted of the highest percentage of total 25%" -> "Comedy movies accounted for the highest percentage of 25%"
Explanation: "Accounted for" is the correct prepositional phrase to use with percentages, and removing "of the total" clarifies the meaning.
"than Drama movies and Sci-fi movies did" -> "than Drama and Sci-fi movies"
Explanation: Removing "did" corrects the grammatical error and simplifies the sentence structure, making it more formal and concise.
"The proportion of Action genres was far higher than of Romance genres" -> "The proportion of Action genres was significantly higher than that of Romance genres"
Explanation: "Significantly" is more precise and formal than "far," and "that of" is the correct prepositional phrase to use with "Romance genres."
"lower than Action movies was 75%" -> "lower than that of Action movies, at 75%"
Explanation: "That of" is the correct phrase to use with "Action movies" in this comparative structure, and the comma after "lower" improves readability.
"the number of Sci-fi movies showed have figures equivalents to Comedy movies was 5%" -> "the number of Sci-fi movies showed equivalent figures to those of Comedy movies, at 5%"
Explanation: "Showed equivalent figures to those of" corrects the verb tense and uses "those of" to match the comparative structure, and the comma after "figures" improves readability.

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5

Explanation: The essay attempts to address the task by providing an overview of the data. However, the essay does not present a clear overview of the main trends or differences between the two countries. The essay also presents some inaccurate information, such as stating that the proportion of Action genres was far higher than Romance genres in Canada. The essay also focuses on details rather than highlighting the key features of the data.

How to improve: The essay could be improved by providing a clearer overview of the main trends and differences between the two countries. The essay should also focus on highlighting the key features of the data, rather than focusing on details. The essay should also be checked for accuracy.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5.0

Explanation:

The essay presents information with some organization, but there is a lack of overall progression. The ideas are not always logically sequenced, and the flow of information can be confusing at times.
There is an attempt to use cohesive devices, but their usage is often inadequate or inaccurate. For example, phrases like "In particular" and "Overall" are used, but not always effectively.
The essay tends to be repetitive, particularly in the way it refers to the data. There is a lack of varied referencing and substitution, which makes the text monotonous.
Paragraphing is used, but it is not always logical. For instance, the second paragraph mixes information about both Taiwan and Canada, which could be better organized.

How to improve:

Improve Logical Sequencing: Ensure that the information is presented in a logical order. For example, discuss all aspects of Taiwan first, then move on to Canada, or vice versa.
Use Cohesive Devices More Effectively: Use a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas more clearly. Phrases like "In contrast," "Similarly," and "On the other hand" can help to show relationships between different pieces of information.
Enhance Paragraphing: Make sure each paragraph has a clear central topic and that paragraphs are logically connected. For example, one paragraph could discuss the most popular genres in Taiwan, while another could focus on the least popular genres in Canada.
Vary Referencing and Substitution: Avoid repetition by using synonyms and different structures to refer to the same data. This will make the essay more engaging and less monotonous.
Clarify Data Presentation: Be more precise in presenting the data. For example, instead of saying "Comedy movies accounted of the highest percentage of total 25%," you could say "Comedy movies accounted for 25% of the total, making it the highest percentage after Action and Romance genres."

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary, which is minimally adequate for the task. While it attempts to convey the main features of the chart, the use of vocabulary is repetitive and lacks variety. There are noticeable errors in word choice, such as "prefers movie genres" instead of "preferred movie genres," and "accounted of the highest percentage" which should be "accounted for the highest percentage." Additionally, there are issues with word formation and grammatical structure, such as "the proportion of Action genres was far higher than of Romance genres," which is awkwardly phrased. These errors may cause some difficulty for the reader, impacting overall clarity.

How to improve: To enhance the lexical resource, the writer should focus on expanding their vocabulary by incorporating more varied and precise terms related to the topic. Additionally, practicing the correct usage of collocations and ensuring grammatical accuracy would improve clarity. Reading more academic or descriptive texts can also help in understanding how to use less common vocabulary effectively.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates a limited range of grammatical structures, primarily using simple sentences with some attempts at complex structures. However, the accuracy of these attempts is inconsistent. There are several grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ("sci-fi genres was the least favorite"), incorrect prepositions ("accounted of"), and awkward phrasing ("the share of Drama movies which was lower than Action movies was 75%"). These errors can cause some difficulty for the reader in understanding the intended meaning. Overall, while the essay conveys the main ideas, the frequent grammatical mistakes and limited variety in sentence structures hinder effective communication.

How to improve: To achieve a higher band score, the writer should focus on expanding their range of grammatical structures by incorporating more complex sentences and ensuring accuracy in their use. Additionally, proofreading for common grammatical errors and improving sentence variety will enhance clarity and coherence. Practicing with a variety of sentence forms and structures will also help in achieving greater flexibility and accuracy in writing.

Bài sửa mẫu

The accompanying illustrations provide information about preferred movie genres in Taiwan and Canada in 2007. Overall, one of the most notable features is that the Action and Romance genres in Taiwan had the highest proportions. However, the sci-fi genre was the least favored in both Taiwan and Canada.

Looking at the diagram, in Taiwan, the proportions of Action and Romance genres were equivalent, each accounting for 30%. Moreover, Comedy movies represented a higher percentage at 25%, compared to Drama and Sci-fi movies, which accounted for 10% and 5% respectively.

In Canada, the proportion of Action genres was significantly higher than that of Romance genres, with respective figures of 57% and 30%. Additionally, Drama movies constituted 25%, which was lower than the 75% share of Action movies. Finally, the number of Sci-fi movies was equivalent to that of Comedy movies, both at 5%.