The diagram below shows the steps in the process of making jam or marmalade. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The flow chart outlines the steps involved in the preparation of homemade jam or marmalade. Overall, there are seven stages in the process of making jam from berries, starting from selecting the berries to sealing the jars. There are slight differences in the preparation of jam and marmalade, primarily concerning the consistency of the fruit.

Firstly, various types of berries, such as strawberries, raspberries, blackberries, or boysenberries, are picked and washed. After cleaning the berries, they are crushed. At this point, there is a distinction between jam and marmalade; for marmalade, the fruit is chunky, while the fruit for jam is grated smoothly instead of being left in thick pieces.

Then, the crushed fruit is placed in a large cooking pot where sugar and pectin are added, with extra pectin specifically for marmalade to act as a thickener. The mixture is boiled for two hours or until the fruit softens and the mixture reaches the required consistency.

Once the mixture is ready, hot jam is poured into jars and sealed tightly with lids. The sealed jars are then placed in a large pot and boiled for five minutes to ensure proper sealing. After that, the jars are carefully removed from the boiling water. The final stage involves labeling the jars once they have cooled down.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"homemade jam or marmalade" -> "homemade jam and marmalade"
Explanation: Using "and" instead of "or" clarifies that the flow chart outlines the preparation process for both types of preserves, rather than suggesting an exclusive choice.
"there are seven stages in the process of making jam from berries" -> "there are seven stages in the process of preparing jam from berries"
Explanation: "Preparing" is a more precise term than "making" in this context, as it emphasizes the methodical nature of the process.
"the fruit for jam is grated smoothly instead of being left in thick pieces" -> "the fruit for jam is finely grated rather than left in large pieces"
Explanation: "Finely grated" provides a clearer description of the texture, while "rather than" is more formal than "instead of," enhancing the academic tone.
"where sugar and pectin are added, with extra pectin specifically for marmalade to act as a thickener" -> "to which sugar and pectin are added, with additional pectin specifically for marmalade serving as a thickening agent"
Explanation: "To which" improves the grammatical structure, and "serving as a thickening agent" is more formal and precise than "to act as a thickener."
"the mixture reaches the required consistency" -> "the mixture attains the desired consistency"
Explanation: "Attains" is a more formal verb than "reaches," and "desired" is more specific than "required," enhancing clarity and precision.
"hot jam is poured into jars and sealed tightly with lids" -> "hot jam is transferred into jars and sealed securely with lids"
Explanation: "Transferred" is a more precise term than "poured," and "sealed securely" adds a level of formality and clarity to the description.
"boiled for five minutes to ensure proper sealing" -> "boiled for five minutes to ensure effective sealing"
Explanation: "Effective" is a more precise term than "proper," indicating a focus on the sealing’s functionality.
"carefully removed from the boiling water" -> "meticulously removed from the boiling water"
Explanation: "Meticulously" conveys a higher level of attention to detail than "carefully," which enhances the academic tone.
"the final stage involves labeling the jars once they have cooled down" -> "the final stage entails labeling the jars after they have cooled"
Explanation: "Entails" is more formal than "involves," and "after" is more concise than "once they have cooled down," improving clarity and conciseness.

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 7

Band Score: 7

Explanation: The essay covers all the requirements of the task and presents a clear overview of the main stages in the process of making jam or marmalade. The essay clearly presents and highlights the key features of the process, including the differences between making jam and marmalade. However, the essay could be more fully extended by providing more detail about the specific steps involved in each stage.

How to improve: The essay could be improved by providing more detail about the specific steps involved in each stage of the process. For example, the essay could provide more information about the types of berries that are used, the amount of sugar and pectin that is added, and the length of time that the mixture is boiled. The essay could also provide more detail about the process of sealing the jars.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score: 7.0

Explanation: The essay logically organizes information and ideas, demonstrating clear progression throughout the description of the jam-making process. Each stage is presented in a sequential manner, which helps the reader follow the process easily. The use of cohesive devices is appropriate, although there are moments where the connection between sentences could be smoother, indicating some under-use or over-reliance on certain phrases. Each paragraph presents a clear central topic, particularly distinguishing between the processes for jam and marmalade, which enhances clarity.

How to improve: To achieve a higher band score, the essay could benefit from a more varied use of cohesive devices to enhance the flow between sentences and paragraphs. Additionally, ensuring that all references are clear and avoiding any repetition would strengthen the overall coherence. More sophisticated paragraphing could also be employed to further highlight the distinctions between jam and marmalade, potentially leading to a more nuanced discussion of the differences in preparation.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score: 7.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary that allows for flexibility and precision in conveying the steps involved in making jam and marmalade. It effectively uses less common lexical items, such as "pectin," "consistency," and "chunky," showing some awareness of style and collocation. However, there are occasional inaccuracies in word choice, such as "grated smoothly" which could be better expressed as "pureed" or "blended." There are also minor errors in spelling and word formation, but these do not impede communication.

How to improve: To achieve a higher band score, the essay could benefit from a wider range of sophisticated vocabulary and more precise word choices. Additionally, incorporating more varied sentence structures and ensuring that all lexical items are used accurately would enhance the overall quality. Reducing any minor errors in spelling and word formation would also contribute to a stronger performance in the Lexical Resource criteria.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score: 7.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates a variety of complex structures and produces frequent error-free sentences, which aligns well with the criteria for Band 7. The writer effectively uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, showcasing good control of grammar and punctuation. However, there are a few minor errors and awkward phrases that slightly detract from the overall accuracy, preventing a higher score.

How to improve: To achieve a higher band score, the writer should focus on enhancing the accuracy of complex sentence structures and reducing minor errors. This can be accomplished by proofreading for grammatical mistakes and refining sentence construction for clarity. Additionally, incorporating a wider range of vocabulary and more varied sentence beginnings could further demonstrate flexibility and sophistication in language use.

Bài sửa mẫu

Firstly, various types of berries, such as strawberries, raspberries, blackberries, or boysenberries, are picked and washed. After cleaning the berries, they are crushed. At this point, there is a distinction between jam and marmalade; for marmalade, the fruit is left chunky, while the fruit for jam is grated smoothly instead of being left in thick pieces.

Then, the crushed fruit is placed in a large cooking pot where sugar and pectin are added, with extra pectin specifically for marmalade to serve as a thickener. The mixture is boiled for two hours or until the fruit softens and the mixture reaches the desired consistency.