It was predicted that with the development of technology, people in the 21st century would have much more free time. To what extent has the prediction come true? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

People in the 21st century are expected to have much more spare time thanks to the rapid advancements in technology. From my viewpoint, I firmly believe that the forecast has become true despite some exceptions and I would elaborately indicate some relevant reasons for this phenomenon.
To begin with, the forecast is true for most ordinary people. Since doing various household chores has been replaced by modern appliances and devices such as vacuum-cleaner robots, washers, and ironing cabinets, thus people tend to have more time to entertain such as setting aside some quality time with family and exercising for the sake of family bond and well-being. Moreover, students have taken advantage of cutting-edge technology like AI chatbots (Chat GPT, Gemini, Gamma), which feasibly solve, investigate any fields, and give high accuracy and in-depth outputs in 10 seconds. Furthermore, it has been witnessed that there are myriad prestigious effective study apps on Google Play and App Store such as PhotoMath, Microsoft Math Solver, and Quanda, all of which can unproblematically help you revise a lecture or even a curriculum.
On the contrary, there are some sectors that the expectation can not be true, at least not at the moment. A typical sector that proved the prediction was wrong, is industry despite being facilitated by a plethora of benefits of modern technology. It is because brand new technology on the production line such as automation just makes the companies gain more and more proceeds without any relevance to allowing employees to get off work early. A few more occupations which have the likelihood of the workload being reduced is impossible, are IT or technicians as the more evolved the technology is, the more they have to come to grips with bugs and technical issues. For instance, in early 2024, Meta encountered a technical issue regarding updating service that caused all clients to log out of their accounts on both Facebook and Instagram. Hence, they mobilized their entire technical team to work through the night and it was not until 8 am the next day that the problem was solved thoroughly.
To conclude, despite having some exceptions of industry and technicians due to the demand to increase more production values and the more technology develops, the more bugs and issues regarding servers, the forecast is almost true for various sectors, ranging from office workers to housewives and students.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"People in the 21st century are expected to have much more spare time" -> "Individuals in the 21st century are anticipated to have significantly more leisure time"
Explanation: Replacing "People" with "Individuals" and "much more spare time" with "significantly more leisure time" refines the language to be more formal and precise, aligning better with academic style.
"From my viewpoint, I firmly believe" -> "From my perspective, I strongly believe"
Explanation: "From my viewpoint" is slightly informal and vague; "From my perspective" is more formal and precise. Additionally, "firmly believe" can be replaced with "strongly believe" for a more academic tone.
"the forecast has become true" -> "the prediction has come to pass"
Explanation: "The forecast has become true" is somewhat informal and simplistic. "The prediction has come to pass" is more formal and academically appropriate.
"elaborately indicate" -> "thoroughly explain"
Explanation: "Elaborately indicate" is awkward and unclear. "Thoroughly explain" is straightforward and maintains the formal tone required in academic writing.
"doing various household chores" -> "performing various household tasks"
Explanation: "Doing" is informal and vague; "performing" is more precise and formal, suitable for academic contexts.
"entertain such as setting aside some quality time with family and exercising" -> "engage in leisure activities such as spending quality time with family and exercising"
Explanation: "Entertain" is not the correct term here; "engage in leisure activities" is more accurate and formal. Also, "setting aside" is replaced with "spending" for clarity and formality.
"AI chatbots (Chat GPT, Gemini, Gamma)" -> "AI chatbots, such as Chat GPT, Gemini, and Gamma"
Explanation: Adding "such as" and commas improves the readability and formality of the list.
"feasibly solve, investigate any fields" -> "feasibly solve and investigate various fields"
Explanation: "feasibly solve, investigate any fields" is grammatically incorrect and awkward. "Feasibly solve and investigate various fields" corrects the grammar and enhances clarity.
"give high accuracy and in-depth outputs in 10 seconds" -> "provide highly accurate and in-depth outputs within 10 seconds"
Explanation: "Give" is too informal and vague; "provide" is more precise and formal. Also, "high accuracy and in-depth outputs in 10 seconds" is awkwardly phrased; "highly accurate and in-depth outputs within 10 seconds" is clearer and more formal.
"myriad prestigious effective study apps" -> "numerous prestigious effective study applications"
Explanation: "Myriad" is somewhat informal and less precise; "numerous" is more appropriate for academic writing. Also, "apps" is informal; "applications" is the correct term in formal contexts.
"unproblematically help you revise" -> "easily assist you in revising"
Explanation: "Unproblematically" is not commonly used in this context; "easily" is more straightforward and appropriate. Also, "help you revise" is informal; "assist you in revising" is more formal and precise.
"at least not at the moment" -> "at least not currently"
Explanation: "At least not at the moment" is awkward and informal. "At least not currently" is more concise and formal.
"brand new technology on the production line" -> "new technologies on the production line"
Explanation: "Brand new" is informal and redundant; "new" is sufficient and maintains formality.
"gain more and more proceeds" -> "generate increasing profits"
Explanation: "Gain more and more proceeds" is informal and vague; "generate increasing profits" is more precise and formal.
"allowing employees to get off work early" -> "enabling employees to leave work earlier"
Explanation: "Get off work early" is informal; "leave work earlier" is more formal and precise.
"A few more occupations which have the likelihood of the workload being reduced is impossible" -> "Several occupations that may not experience reduced workloads"
Explanation: The original sentence is grammatically incorrect and awkward. The revised version corrects these issues and is clearer and more formal.
"the more evolved the technology is, the more they have to come to grips with bugs and technical issues" -> "the more advanced the technology becomes, the more they must address bugs and technical issues"
Explanation: "The more evolved the technology is" is less formal and slightly awkward; "the more advanced the technology becomes" is more formal and flows better. Also, "come to grips with" is informal; "address" is more precise and suitable for academic writing.
"it was not until 8 am the next day that the problem was solved thoroughly" -> "it was not until 8 am the following day that the issue was fully resolved"
Explanation: "The problem was solved thoroughly" is slightly informal; "the issue was fully resolved" is more formal and precise.

These changes enhance the formality, precision, and clarity of the essay, aligning it more closely with academic writing standards.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Task Response: 7

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both sides of the argument regarding whether the prediction about increased free time due to technology has come true. The author provides examples of how technology has benefited ordinary people, such as through household appliances and educational tools. However, the discussion on sectors where the prediction does not hold true, like industry and IT, is somewhat limited. While the author mentions these sectors, the examples provided could be more robust and detailed to fully illustrate the argument.
- How to improve: To enhance the response, the writer should ensure that each part of the question is thoroughly explored. This could involve providing more specific examples and evidence for both sides of the argument. For instance, discussing additional sectors or providing statistics on time saved due to technology could strengthen the argument.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear position that the prediction has largely come true, despite some exceptions. The phrase "I firmly believe" indicates a strong stance. However, the transition between discussing the positive impacts of technology and the exceptions could be smoother. The shift to the opposing viewpoint feels somewhat abrupt, which may confuse readers about the overall position.
- How to improve: To maintain a clearer position, the writer could use transitional phrases that reinforce the main argument while acknowledging counterarguments. For example, explicitly stating how the exceptions do not undermine the overall trend could help clarify the position.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents several ideas, such as the benefits of household technology and educational apps, but some of these ideas are not fully developed. For instance, while the mention of AI chatbots is relevant, the explanation lacks depth regarding how they specifically contribute to free time. The examples provided are relevant but could be expanded upon to better support the main argument.
- How to improve: The writer should aim to elaborate on each point made. This could involve providing more detailed explanations or additional examples that illustrate how technology has led to more free time. For instance, discussing specific time savings from using technology in daily tasks could provide a stronger foundation for the argument.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the relationship between technology and free time. However, there are moments where the discussion veers slightly off course, particularly in the section about the IT sector. The example regarding Meta, while relevant, could be seen as a tangent that does not directly address the impact of technology on free time.
- How to improve: To maintain focus, the writer should ensure that all examples and arguments directly relate back to the central question of free time. It may be helpful to outline the main points before writing to ensure that each paragraph contributes to the overall argument. Additionally, ensuring that each example ties back to the main thesis will help keep the essay on track.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The introduction effectively states the writer’s viewpoint and outlines the argument. The first body paragraph discusses how technology has increased free time for ordinary people, providing relevant examples such as household appliances and educational tools. The second body paragraph contrasts this by discussing sectors where the prediction does not hold true, such as industry and IT. However, the transition between the two body paragraphs could be smoother; the shift from discussing benefits to drawbacks feels somewhat abrupt.
- How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using transitional phrases that explicitly indicate a shift in perspective, such as "On the other hand," or "Conversely." Additionally, ensure that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that summarizes the main idea, which can help guide the reader through the argument more effectively.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay uses paragraphs appropriately, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct aspect of the argument. The first paragraph effectively discusses the positive impact of technology, while the second addresses the negative implications. However, the paragraphs could benefit from clearer internal organization. For instance, the first paragraph contains multiple examples that could be better structured to enhance clarity and impact.
- How to improve: Consider breaking down longer paragraphs into smaller ones if they contain multiple ideas. Each paragraph should ideally focus on one main idea supported by examples. For example, the first body paragraph could be split into two: one focusing on household chores and the other on educational technology. This would make the essay more digestible and allow for deeper exploration of each point.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs some cohesive devices, such as "To begin with," "Moreover," and "On the contrary," which help to connect ideas. However, the range of cohesive devices used is somewhat limited, and some transitions feel mechanical. For instance, the phrase "it has been witnessed that" is somewhat awkward and could be replaced with a more natural expression.
- How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, incorporate a wider variety of linking words and phrases, such as "Additionally," "Furthermore," "In contrast," and "For example." This will not only improve the flow of the essay but also enhance the reader’s understanding of the relationships between ideas. Additionally, consider using pronouns and synonyms to refer back to previously mentioned concepts, which can help to avoid repetition and create a more cohesive narrative.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a coherent argument. By focusing on improving the logical flow between paragraphs, refining paragraph structure, and diversifying cohesive devices, the writer can enhance the overall clarity and effectiveness of their writing.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 7

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable range of vocabulary, with terms like "advancements," "forecast," "phenomenon," and "unproblematically" showcasing an ability to use varied language. However, some phrases are somewhat repetitive or overly simplistic, such as "the forecast is true" and "the expectation can not be true." This could limit the overall impression of lexical variety.
- How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, the writer could incorporate synonyms or more sophisticated expressions. For example, instead of repeating "the forecast is true," alternatives like "the prediction holds merit" or "the assertion is substantiated" could be used. Additionally, exploring idiomatic expressions or more nuanced vocabulary related to technology and time management could further enrich the essay.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains instances of precise vocabulary, such as "cutting-edge technology" and "plethora of benefits." However, there are also imprecise usages, such as "entertain" in "have more time to entertain," which is unclear in this context. The phrase "come to grips with bugs" is also somewhat informal and may not fit the academic tone expected in IELTS essays.
- How to improve: The writer should aim for clarity and appropriateness in word choice. For instance, replacing "entertain" with "engage in leisure activities" would clarify the meaning. Additionally, using more formal language in technical contexts, such as "address technical issues" instead of "come to grips with bugs," would enhance precision and formality.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally displays good spelling accuracy, with few errors. However, there are minor issues, such as "vacuum-cleaner robots" which should be hyphenated as "vacuum cleaner robots," and "unproblematically," which is less common and may not be recognized by all readers.
- How to improve: To improve spelling accuracy, the writer should proofread the essay for common errors and ensure that compound nouns are correctly formatted. Utilizing spelling and grammar checking tools can also help catch mistakes. Regular practice with vocabulary lists and writing exercises can further enhance spelling skills.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid command of vocabulary, there is room for improvement in terms of range, precision, and spelling accuracy. By incorporating more varied and precise vocabulary, maintaining a formal tone, and ensuring correct spelling, the writer can enhance the overall quality of their lexical resource in future essays.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a fair range of sentence structures, including simple, compound, and complex sentences. For example, the use of complex structures is evident in sentences like, "A typical sector that proved the prediction was wrong, is industry despite being facilitated by a plethora of benefits of modern technology." However, there are instances of awkward phrasing and run-on sentences, such as "Moreover, students have taken advantage of cutting-edge technology like AI chatbots (Chat GPT, Gemini, Gamma), which feasibly solve, investigate any fields, and give high accuracy and in-depth outputs in 10 seconds." This sentence could be more effectively structured for clarity and impact.
- How to improve: To diversify sentence structures, consider varying the placement of clauses and using more introductory phrases. For instance, instead of starting with "Moreover," you could begin with "In addition to household chores, students…" This would create a smoother transition and enhance the flow of ideas. Practicing the use of different sentence types, such as conditional sentences or passive voice, can also add variety.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that detract from its overall clarity. For example, the phrase "the forecast is true for most ordinary people" is somewhat vague and could benefit from more precise language. Additionally, the sentence "it has been witnessed that there are myriad prestigious effective study apps…" is awkwardly constructed and could be simplified. Punctuation errors, such as the comma splice in "A typical sector that proved the prediction was wrong, is industry," also affect readability.
- How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, it is essential to review common grammatical structures and their correct usage. For instance, ensure that clauses are properly connected and avoid comma splices by using conjunctions or separating independent clauses into distinct sentences. Additionally, proofreading for punctuation errors and ensuring that commas are used correctly can enhance clarity. Consider practicing with grammar exercises focused on common problem areas, such as subject-verb agreement and sentence fragments.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid grasp of grammatical range and accuracy, there are areas for improvement in sentence structure variety and grammatical precision. By focusing on these aspects, the writer can enhance the overall quality of their writing and potentially achieve a higher band score.

Bài sửa mẫu

People in the 21st century are expected to have much more spare time thanks to the rapid advancements in technology. From my viewpoint, I firmly believe that the forecast has come true despite some exceptions, and I will thoroughly explain some relevant reasons for this phenomenon.

To begin with, the forecast is true for most ordinary people. Since performing various household tasks has been replaced by modern appliances and devices such as vacuum-cleaner robots, washers, and ironing cabinets, people tend to have more time to engage in leisure activities, such as spending quality time with family and exercising for the sake of family bonds and well-being. Moreover, students have taken advantage of cutting-edge technology like AI chatbots (Chat GPT, Gemini, Gamma), which feasibly solve and investigate various fields and provide highly accurate and in-depth outputs within 10 seconds. Furthermore, it has been witnessed that there are numerous prestigious effective study applications on Google Play and the App Store, such as PhotoMath, Microsoft Math Solver, and Quanda, all of which can easily assist you in revising a lecture or even a curriculum.

On the contrary, there are some sectors where the expectation cannot be true, at least not currently. A typical sector that proves the prediction wrong is industry, despite being facilitated by a plethora of benefits from modern technology. This is because new technologies on the production line, such as automation, just enable companies to generate increasing profits without allowing employees to leave work earlier. A few more occupations that may not experience reduced workloads are IT professionals or technicians, as the more advanced the technology becomes, the more they must address bugs and technical issues. For instance, in early 2024, Meta encountered a technical issue regarding an update service that caused all clients to log out of their accounts on both Facebook and Instagram. Hence, they mobilized their entire technical team to work through the night, and it was not until 8 am the following day that the issue was fully resolved.

To conclude, despite some exceptions in industry and among technicians due to the demand to increase production values and the fact that the more technology develops, the more bugs and issues regarding servers arise, the forecast is almost true for various sectors, ranging from office workers to housewives and students.