Nowadays, many inhabited places in the world have been affected by severe flooding. What are the causes? What can be done to prevent it from happening in the future?

Nowadays, many inhabited places in the world have been affected by severe flooding. What are the causes?
What can be done to prevent it from happening in the future?

Flood, which is one of the natural disasters that causes serious damage to property and human’s life. This article will discuss the causes and solutions to reverse flooding.
There are two main reasons why floods occur. First, floods occur due to natural phenomena, including storms, high winds and prolonged heavy rain. The drainage system cannot operate because the amount of water is too large, causing the water level to increase rapidly, causing floods. Second, due to human actions, such as deforestation or urbanization. Cutting down trees on the area will cause water to circulate faster into the delta, causing floods and more seriously, flash floods. In addition, there are a number of other causes such as tsunamis, dam failures, etc.
The frequency and severity of floods is increasing due to climate change, so solutions are extremely important. First, the government needs to have a plan to protect and develop forests. Planting more trees to reduce climate change and trees will also contribute to preventing flood water levels. Second, build and develop drainage systems and dams. Third, people should prepare mentally, food, and time to move to a safe place when the storm begins and lasts to limit damage to property and people's lives.
In conclusion, floods occur due to many reasons but mainly due to nature, and human activities. The government and people are increasingly preventing and taking solutions to minimize floods.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

1. "Flood, which is one of the natural disasters that causes serious damage to property and human’s life." -> "Floods, which are among the most destructive natural disasters, cause significant damage to property and human life."
   Explanation: The original phrase "human’s life" is grammatically incorrect and awkward. Replacing it with "human life" corrects the possessive error and enhances the formal tone. Additionally, "most destructive" is more precise than "serious," and "significant" is a more formal synonym for "serious."

2. "This article will discuss the causes and solutions to reverse flooding." -> "This essay will explore the causes and potential solutions to mitigate flooding."
   Explanation: "Reverse" is not the correct term in this context; "mitigate" is more appropriate as it refers to reducing the severity or impact of flooding. "Essay" is more formal than "article," and "explore" is a more academic verb than "discuss."

3. "First, floods occur due to natural phenomena, including storms, high winds and prolonged heavy rain." -> "First, floods result from natural phenomena such as storms, high winds, and prolonged heavy rainfall."
   Explanation: "Result from" is more precise than "occur due to," and "rainfall" is a more specific term than "rain." Also, using "such as" instead of "including" is more formal and appropriate in academic writing.

4. "The drainage system cannot operate because the amount of water is too large, causing the water level to increase rapidly, causing floods." -> "The drainage system is overwhelmed by the excessive water volume, leading to a rapid increase in water levels, resulting in floods."
   Explanation: "Is overwhelmed" is a more precise description of the drainage system’s inability to function, and "leading to" is clearer than "causing." Also, "resulting in" is more formal than "causing."

5. "Cutting down trees on the area will cause water to circulate faster into the delta, causing floods and more seriously, flash floods." -> "Removing trees in the area accelerates water flow into the delta, leading to floods and potentially flash floods."
   Explanation: "Removing" is more specific than "Cutting down," and "accelerates" is a more precise term than "cause to circulate faster." "Potentially" is used to indicate the possibility of flash floods, which is more appropriate than "more seriously."

6. "The frequency and severity of floods is increasing" -> "The frequency and severity of floods are increasing"
   Explanation: "Is" should be "are" to agree with the plural subject "frequency and severity."

7. "First, the government needs to have a plan to protect and develop forests." -> "First, the government must develop a comprehensive plan to protect and develop forests."
   Explanation: "Must" is more assertive and formal than "needs," and "comprehensive" adds specificity to the plan’s scope.

8. "Planting more trees to reduce climate change and trees will also contribute to preventing flood water levels." -> "Planting more trees can help reduce climate change and contribute to lowering floodwater levels."
   Explanation: "Can help" is more tentative and appropriate for academic writing, and "lowering" is a more precise term than "preventing flood water levels."

9. "build and develop drainage systems and dams." -> "construct and develop drainage systems and dams."
   Explanation: "Construct" is a more formal and precise verb than "build" in this context, referring to the creation of infrastructure.

10. "people should prepare mentally, food, and time to move to a safe place when the storm begins and lasts to limit damage to property and people’s lives." -> "individuals should prepare mentally, stockpile food, and allocate time to relocate to a safe location when the storm begins and persists to minimize damage to property and lives."
    Explanation: "Individuals" is more formal than "people," and "stockpile" is more precise than "prepare mentally, food." "Allocate" is more formal than "prepare time," and "persist" is more accurate than "lasts" in describing the duration of the storm. "Minimize" is preferred over "limit" for a more formal tone.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Task Response: 5 – UNDER WORD

• Answer All Parts of the Question:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay addresses both parts of the prompt by discussing the causes of flooding and suggesting solutions. However, the response lacks depth and specificity. For instance, while the essay mentions "natural phenomena" and "human actions," it does not elaborate on how these factors interact or their specific impacts on flooding. The solutions provided are somewhat generic and do not fully explore the complexities of flood prevention.
  • How to improve: To comprehensively address all elements of the question, the writer should provide more detailed explanations for each cause and solution. For example, discussing specific examples of how urbanization leads to flooding or providing case studies of successful flood prevention measures would enhance the response. Additionally, the writer should ensure that they meet the word count requirement to avoid penalties.

• Present a Clear Position Throughout:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a general position on the causes and solutions to flooding, but it lacks a strong, consistent voice. The introduction states that the article will discuss causes and solutions, yet it does not clearly articulate a personal stance or the significance of these issues. The conclusion reiterates the causes and solutions but does not reinforce a clear position or argument.
  • How to improve: To maintain a clear and consistent position, the writer should explicitly state their viewpoint in the introduction and reinforce it throughout the essay. For example, they could argue that human actions are the primary cause of flooding and that addressing these actions is crucial for effective prevention. Including a thesis statement that reflects this position would help guide the reader.

• Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay presents some ideas regarding the causes and solutions of flooding, but these ideas are not sufficiently extended or supported. For instance, the mention of "deforestation" as a cause is not backed by specific examples or data, which would strengthen the argument. Similarly, the proposed solutions lack elaboration on how they can be implemented or their potential effectiveness.
  • How to improve: To effectively present, extend, and substantiate ideas, the writer should provide specific examples and evidence for each point made. This could include statistics on flooding incidents, studies on the effectiveness of reforestation, or examples of cities that have successfully implemented flood prevention measures. Additionally, using linking phrases to connect ideas would improve the flow of the essay.

• Stay on Topic:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, discussing flooding causes and solutions. However, there are moments where the focus wavers, particularly in the conclusion, which summarizes rather than synthesizes the information presented. The mention of "tsunamis" and "dam failures" as additional causes feels somewhat tangential and not fully integrated into the main argument.
  • How to improve: To maintain focus and relevance, the writer should ensure that all points made directly relate to the main topic of flooding. It would be beneficial to limit the discussion to the most relevant causes and solutions, providing a more in-depth analysis of each. The conclusion should also aim to synthesize the main points rather than merely restate them, reinforcing the overall argument.

In summary, to improve the essay and potentially raise the band score, the writer should focus on providing more detailed and specific responses to each part of the prompt, maintaining a clear position, supporting ideas with evidence, and staying tightly focused on the topic throughout.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

• Organize Information Logically:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs discussing causes and solutions, and a conclusion. However, the logical flow could be improved. For instance, the transition from discussing causes to solutions is somewhat abrupt. The essay starts with a general statement about floods and then lists causes without a clear connection to the solutions that follow. While the points are relevant, they could be better linked to enhance the overall coherence.
  • How to improve: To enhance logical organization, consider using transitional phrases that explicitly connect the causes to the solutions. For example, after discussing the causes, a sentence like "To address these issues, several solutions can be implemented" would provide a smoother transition. Additionally, grouping related ideas together and ensuring each paragraph has a clear topic sentence can help maintain focus and clarity.

• Use Paragraphs:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay uses paragraphs effectively, with distinct sections for causes and solutions. However, the paragraph discussing causes could be further divided to separate natural causes from human-induced ones, which would allow for more in-depth exploration of each type. The conclusion, while summarizing the main points, could benefit from being more than just a restatement of previous ideas.
  • How to improve: To improve paragraphing, consider creating separate paragraphs for each main cause and solution. For example, one paragraph could focus solely on natural causes, while another could address human actions. This would allow for more detailed explanations and examples. Additionally, the conclusion could be expanded to include a reflection on the implications of flooding or a call to action, rather than simply summarizing the points made.

• Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay employs some cohesive devices, such as "first," "second," and "in addition," which help to organize ideas. However, the range of cohesive devices is somewhat limited, and there are instances where the connections between sentences could be strengthened. For example, the phrase "causing floods" is repeated multiple times, which can lead to redundancy and disrupt the flow.
  • How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, consider incorporating a wider variety of linking words and phrases, such as "moreover," "furthermore," or "consequently," to connect ideas more fluidly. Additionally, using synonyms or rephrasing to avoid repetition can enhance the cohesiveness of the essay. For instance, instead of repeatedly using "causing floods," you could use "resulting in flooding" or "leading to inundation" to maintain reader engagement.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents relevant information, improvements in logical organization, paragraphing, and the use of cohesive devices could elevate the coherence and cohesion to a higher band score.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

• Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary related to the topic of flooding. Terms such as "natural disasters," "severe flooding," "drainage system," and "urbanization" are appropriately used. However, the vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive. For instance, the word "flood" is used multiple times without variation, which detracts from the overall lexical variety.
  • How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, consider using synonyms or related terms. For example, instead of repeatedly using "flood," you could incorporate terms like "inundation," "deluge," or "flooding events." Additionally, introducing more descriptive adjectives (e.g., "catastrophic flooding" or "devastating storms") can enrich the language.

• Use Vocabulary Precisely:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay contains some instances of imprecise vocabulary usage. For example, the phrase "human’s life" is awkward and should be revised to "human life." Additionally, the phrase "the drainage system cannot operate" could be more precisely stated as "the drainage system becomes overwhelmed." These inaccuracies can lead to confusion or misinterpretation of the intended meaning.
  • How to improve: To improve precision, it is essential to review word choices and ensure they convey the intended meaning clearly. Consider using more specific terms related to flooding and its causes. For instance, instead of "cutting down trees on the area," you could say "deforestation in the region." Regularly practicing with vocabulary exercises and seeking feedback on word choice can also help refine precision.

• Use Correct Spelling:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay generally demonstrates a good level of spelling accuracy, with only a few minor errors. For example, the phrase "human’s life" should be corrected to "human life," but there are no glaring spelling mistakes that significantly hinder comprehension.
  • How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, it is beneficial to proofread the essay carefully before submission. Utilizing spell-check tools and maintaining a personal list of commonly misspelled words can also be effective strategies. Additionally, practicing writing regularly can help reinforce correct spelling habits.

Overall, while the essay meets some criteria for lexical resource, there is room for improvement in vocabulary range, precision, and spelling. Focusing on these areas will help elevate the band score in future writing tasks.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

• Use a Wide Range of Structures:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable variety of sentence structures, including simple, compound, and complex sentences. For instance, the use of "First, floods occur due to natural phenomena, including storms, high winds and prolonged heavy rain" showcases a compound structure that effectively lists causes. However, there are instances of repetitive sentence beginnings and structures, such as starting multiple sentences with "First" and "Second," which can detract from the overall variety. Additionally, the sentence "Cutting down trees on the area will cause water to circulate faster into the delta" could be restructured for better clarity and engagement.
  • How to improve: To enhance the range of structures, consider varying the ways sentences are introduced. Instead of relying heavily on "First" and "Second," you could use phrases like "One significant factor is…" or "Another contributing element is…" This not only diversifies the sentence openings but also adds a more sophisticated tone. Additionally, incorporating more complex sentences that combine ideas could improve the depth of analysis, such as using subordinate clauses to explain relationships between causes and effects more fluidly.

• Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay generally maintains good grammatical accuracy, but there are notable errors that affect clarity. For example, the phrase "human’s life" should be corrected to "human lives" for grammatical correctness. Additionally, the sentence "The drainage system cannot operate because the amount of water is too large, causing the water level to increase rapidly, causing floods" contains a redundancy with the repeated use of "causing," which can lead to confusion. Punctuation is mostly correct, but there are areas where commas could enhance readability, such as before "and" in lists or before introductory phrases.
  • How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, pay close attention to subject-verb agreement and pluralization. Review sentences for redundancy and strive to eliminate repetitive phrases. For punctuation, practice using commas to separate items in a list and to clarify complex sentences. For instance, revising the aforementioned sentence to "The drainage system cannot operate because the amount of water is too large, which leads to a rapid increase in water levels and, consequently, floods" would enhance clarity and flow. Regular practice with grammar exercises and reading well-structured essays can also help in reinforcing these skills.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents coherent arguments, focusing on diversifying sentence structures and enhancing grammatical accuracy will help achieve a higher band score in future assessments.

Bài sửa mẫu

Floods, which are among the most destructive natural disasters, cause significant damage to property and human life. This essay will explore the causes and potential solutions to mitigate flooding.

There are two main reasons why floods occur. First, floods result from natural phenomena, including storms, high winds, and prolonged heavy rainfall. The drainage system becomes overwhelmed by the excessive water volume, leading to a rapid increase in water levels, which results in floods. Second, human activities, such as deforestation and urbanization, contribute significantly to flooding. Removing trees in the area accelerates water flow into the delta, leading to floods and, more seriously, flash floods. Additionally, there are other causes, such as tsunamis and dam failures.

The frequency and severity of floods are increasing due to climate change, making solutions extremely important. First, the government must develop a comprehensive plan to protect and enhance forests. Planting more trees can help reduce climate change and contribute to lowering floodwater levels. Second, it is essential to construct and develop drainage systems and dams. Third, individuals should prepare mentally, stockpile food, and allocate time to relocate to a safe location when storms begin and persist to minimize damage to property and lives.

In conclusion, floods occur due to various reasons, primarily natural phenomena and human activities. Both the government and individuals must take proactive measures to prevent and mitigate the impact of floods.