Technology is becoming increasingly prevalent in the world today. In the not too distant future, technology will completely replace the teacher in the classroom. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Technology and distance learning are developed a lot, so that in the future the society will not need a human teacher anymore. In my opinion, I don’t agree with this statement. I believe that education always changes to suit each generation of students. Besides that, each teacher for each subject will have a different way of teaching, but robots do not.

Each age group of students will suit different teaching methods because their thoughts and societies are different. Therefore, teaching in the same way like robots to both previous and next generations will not suit the trend of the next generation and make students feel bored. Also, students will be sleepy and miss the knowledge. The examples of different generational thinking are like: in Vietnam, our grandparent’s generation lived in the post-war period so they have many old-fashioned ideas, while our young generation was born in the age of technology so that they have more open-minded and creative ideas.

Each subject will have different attractions, and so does each human teacher. If we let the robots teach, the different attractions of each subject will be lost, and we will lose the rich and creative communication of the teacher profession. For example, teachers can create their own games and give out prizes to celebrate to help students feel more interested in learning. In addition, the robot can be broken down, so a human teacher is very needed.

To sum up, no matter how modern machines are, they are still inferior to humans because they can not be creative and change flexibly like a human teacher, so in the future, even if robots teach students, human teachers will still be needed.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"Technology and distance learning are developed a lot" -> "Technology and distance learning have developed significantly"
Explanation: The phrase "are developed a lot" is grammatically incorrect and informal. "Have developed significantly" corrects the grammar and enhances the formality of the statement.
"so that in the future the society will not need a human teacher anymore" -> "therefore, in the future, society may not require human teachers"
Explanation: The original phrase is awkwardly constructed and informal. The revised version is more formal and clearer, improving the flow and precision.
"I don’t agree with this statement" -> "I disagree with this assertion"
Explanation: "I don’t agree" is too informal for academic writing. "I disagree" is more formal, and "assertion" is a more precise term than "statement" in this context.
"I believe that education always changes to suit each generation of students" -> "I contend that education continually adapts to the needs of each successive generation of students"
Explanation: "I believe" is somewhat informal; "I contend" is more assertive and academic. "Continually adapts" is more precise than "always changes," and "successive generation" is a more formal term.
"Besides that, each teacher for each subject will have a different way of teaching, but robots do not" -> "Furthermore, each teacher for each subject employs distinct teaching methods, whereas robots do not"
Explanation: "Besides that" is informal and vague; "Furthermore" is more formal and appropriate for academic writing. "Employes distinct teaching methods" is more precise than "have a different way of teaching."
"Each age group of students will suit different teaching methods" -> "Each age group of students requires distinct teaching approaches"
Explanation: "Will suit" is incorrect; "requires" is the correct verb to use in this context. "Distinct teaching approaches" is more formal and precise than "different teaching methods."
"teaching in the same way like robots to both previous and next generations" -> "teaching methods similar to those of robots may not be suitable for both previous and subsequent generations"
Explanation: The original phrase is awkward and informal. The revision clarifies and formalizes the statement, improving readability and precision.
"make students feel bored" -> "lead to student boredom"
Explanation: "Make students feel bored" is informal and vague. "Lead to student boredom" is more formal and succinct.
"The examples of different generational thinking are like" -> "Examples of generational differences include"
Explanation: "The examples of different generational thinking are like" is awkward and informal. "Examples of generational differences include" is clearer and more formal.
"our young generation was born in the age of technology" -> "our younger generation has grown up in the technological era"
Explanation: "Was born in the age of technology" is less precise and slightly informal. "Has grown up in the technological era" is more accurate and formal.
"so that they have more open-minded and creative ideas" -> "resulting in more open-minded and creative ideas"
Explanation: "So that they have" is informal and less direct. "Resulting in" is more formal and clearly indicates causality.
"the robot can be broken down" -> "robots can malfunction"
Explanation: "The robot can be broken down" is vague and informal. "Robots can malfunction" is more specific and appropriate for an academic context.
"a human teacher is very needed" -> "human teachers are essential"
Explanation: "A human teacher is very needed" is informal and imprecise. "Human teachers are essential" is more formal and assertive, fitting the academic tone better.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Task Response: 7

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay addresses the prompt by clearly stating a disagreement with the notion that technology will completely replace teachers. The introduction sets the stage for the argument, and the body paragraphs provide reasons supporting this stance, such as the adaptability of human teachers and the potential loss of engagement in learning if robots were to take over. However, while the essay touches on the implications of technology in education, it could benefit from a more thorough exploration of the opposing viewpoint regarding the role of technology in classrooms.
- How to improve: To enhance the response, the essay could include a brief acknowledgment of the benefits of technology in education, such as personalized learning or accessibility, before refuting these points. This would demonstrate a more balanced approach and deepen the analysis.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The position against the complete replacement of teachers is clear throughout the essay. The writer consistently argues that human teachers are essential due to their creativity and adaptability. However, the phrasing in some areas could be more assertive to reinforce the position. For instance, phrases like "I believe" can be replaced with stronger assertions to convey confidence in the argument.
- How to improve: To maintain a clear and assertive position, the writer should avoid tentative language and instead use definitive statements. Additionally, reiterating the main argument in the conclusion with a strong summary of the key points would reinforce the stance taken.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents several ideas, such as the adaptability of teaching methods and the unique qualities of human interaction in education. However, some points lack depth and specific examples. For instance, the mention of generational differences in learning styles could be expanded with more concrete examples or research to support the claims made.
- How to improve: To strengthen the support for ideas, the writer should include more detailed examples or evidence, such as studies on student engagement or testimonials from educators. This would provide a more robust foundation for the arguments presented and enhance the overall persuasiveness of the essay.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the role of technology versus human teachers. However, there are moments where the discussion could be more tightly focused. For example, the point about robots being "broken down" feels somewhat tangential and could be better integrated into a broader argument about reliability and the human touch in education.
- How to improve: To maintain focus, the writer should ensure that every point made directly supports the central argument. Avoiding off-topic statements and ensuring that each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next would help maintain coherence and relevance throughout the essay.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the task and presents a clear argument, improvements in depth of analysis, assertiveness of position, and focus on the topic would elevate the score further.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear stance against the idea that technology will completely replace teachers. The arguments are organized in a logical sequence, moving from the introduction of the topic to specific examples supporting the thesis. For instance, the essay discusses generational differences in learning styles and the unique attributes of human teachers. However, the transition between ideas could be smoother; for example, the shift from discussing generational differences to the unique qualities of teachers feels abrupt.
- How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph that directly relate back to the thesis. Additionally, transitional phrases such as "Furthermore," "In contrast," or "For instance," can help guide the reader through the argument more seamlessly.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay uses paragraphs effectively, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the argument. The first paragraph introduces the topic and the writer’s position, while subsequent paragraphs elaborate on different points. However, the paragraphs could be more distinct in their focus. For example, the second paragraph mixes generational differences with the teaching methods, which could be separated for clarity.
- How to improve: To improve paragraph structure, ensure that each paragraph has a single main idea. Consider starting a new paragraph when introducing a new point or example. For instance, the discussion about the potential loss of engagement with robots could be a separate paragraph dedicated to the unique qualities of human interaction in education.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs some cohesive devices, such as "besides that" and "for example," which help connect ideas. However, the range of cohesive devices is limited, and some sentences feel disjointed. For example, the phrase "the robot can be broken down" appears without a clear connection to the previous sentence, which could confuse readers.
- How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, incorporate a wider variety of linking words and phrases. For instance, use "Moreover," "In addition," or "Consequently" to enhance connections between sentences and ideas. Additionally, ensure that each cohesive device used is contextually appropriate and contributes to the overall clarity of the argument.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a coherent argument. By focusing on improving transitions, refining paragraph structure, and expanding the use of cohesive devices, the essay can achieve an even higher level of coherence and cohesion.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, but it lacks variety and sophistication. Phrases like “developed a lot” and “not suit the trend” are somewhat simplistic and could be expressed with more advanced vocabulary. For instance, instead of “developed a lot,” the writer could use “advanced significantly” or “evolved considerably.” Additionally, the phrase “the rich and creative communication of the teacher profession” could be rephrased for clarity and precision.
- How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, the writer should actively incorporate synonyms and more complex phrases. Reading academic articles or essays can expose the writer to higher-level vocabulary. Keeping a vocabulary journal where new words and phrases are noted and practiced could also be beneficial.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: While some vocabulary is used correctly, there are instances of imprecise usage. For example, the phrase “the robot can be broken down” could be misleading; it might be clearer to say “robots can malfunction” or “robots can fail.” The term “attractions” when referring to subjects is also vague; a more precise term could be “engagement” or “appeal.”
- How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should focus on understanding the nuances of word meanings and contexts. Engaging with vocabulary exercises that emphasize collocations and context-specific usage will help. Additionally, reviewing feedback on word choice in previous writings can guide the writer in making more informed choices.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several spelling errors that detract from its overall quality. For instance, “grandparent’s generation” should be “grandparents’ generation” to reflect the plural possessive form. The phrase “can not” is often written as “cannot” in formal writing. Such errors can undermine the reader’s confidence in the writer’s language proficiency.
- How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, the writer should practice regular proofreading of their work. Utilizing spell-check tools and reading essays aloud can help catch errors. Additionally, creating a list of commonly misspelled words and practicing them can be effective. Engaging in spelling quizzes or games can also make this practice more enjoyable and effective.

By addressing these areas for improvement, the writer can work towards achieving a higher band score in the Lexical Resource criterion.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable variety of sentence structures, including simple, compound, and complex sentences. For example, the use of "In my opinion, I don’t agree with this statement" shows a clear opinion, while "Each age group of students will suit different teaching methods because their thoughts and societies are different" employs a complex structure effectively. However, there are instances of repetitive structures, particularly in the way ideas are introduced and expanded upon, which can detract from the overall fluency and coherence of the writing.
- How to improve: To enhance the variety of sentence structures, the writer could incorporate more complex sentences with subordinate clauses and varied conjunctions. For instance, instead of repeatedly starting sentences with "Each" or "If," the writer could use introductory phrases or clauses to create more dynamic sentence openings. Additionally, integrating more varied transition phrases could help in connecting ideas more fluidly.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay exhibits a generally good command of grammar, but there are noticeable errors that affect clarity. For example, the phrase "technology and distance learning are developed a lot" should be rephrased to "technology and distance learning have developed significantly" to reflect proper tense usage. Punctuation errors are also present, such as the misuse of commas, which can lead to run-on sentences, as seen in "For example, teachers can create their own games and give out prizes to celebrate to help students feel more interested in learning." This sentence could benefit from clearer punctuation to separate ideas effectively.
- How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should focus on subject-verb agreement and verb tense consistency. Practicing sentence restructuring can also help in avoiding run-on sentences. For punctuation, reviewing rules regarding comma usage, especially in complex sentences, will enhance clarity. The writer might consider breaking longer sentences into shorter ones to improve readability and ensure that each idea is clearly articulated.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents coherent arguments, focusing on diversifying sentence structures and refining grammatical accuracy will help elevate the writing to a higher band score.

Bài sửa mẫu

Technology and distance learning have developed significantly, leading some to believe that in the future, society may not require human teachers anymore. In my opinion, I disagree with this assertion. I contend that education continually adapts to the needs of each successive generation of students. Furthermore, each teacher for each subject employs distinct teaching methods, whereas robots do not.

Each age group of students requires different teaching approaches because their perspectives and societal contexts vary. Therefore, employing teaching methods similar to those of robots for both previous and subsequent generations may not align with the trends of the next generation and could lead to student boredom. Additionally, students may become disengaged and miss out on valuable knowledge. Examples of generational differences include the fact that in Vietnam, our grandparents’ generation lived in the post-war period and thus holds many old-fashioned ideas, while our younger generation has grown up in the technological era, resulting in more open-minded and creative ideas.

Each subject possesses its own unique appeal, as does each human teacher. If we allow robots to take over teaching, the distinct attractions of each subject may be lost, along with the rich and creative communication that characterizes the teaching profession. For instance, teachers can design their own games and offer prizes to engage students, fostering a more stimulating learning environment. Additionally, robots can malfunction, making human teachers essential.

To sum up, no matter how advanced machines become, they remain inferior to humans because they cannot be creative and adapt flexibly like a human teacher. Therefore, in the future, even if robots are involved in teaching, human teachers will still be needed.