The chart below illustrate the quality of a tourist office in United Kingdom from January to June In general, It can be seen from the chart that the tourist office witnessed a slightly decrease in request by letter or email.Besides, It also noticeable that the number of request in person is the lowest. At first, the quality of information get by telephone takes up around 850.While the number of that in person is about 410.Moreover, the resquest of using letter as well as email is higher than in person in January. The figure for the requests for information in person increases from march to June by 800 to 2000 request. By contrast, the quality of people who use letter or email decreases remarkably from January to June, but it remains unchanged from may to june. On the other hand, the number of people using by telephone drops the lowest in Febuary but then It jumps from march to June

The chart below illustrate the quality of a tourist office in United Kingdom from January to June
In general, It can be seen from the chart that the tourist office witnessed a slightly decrease in request by letter or email.Besides, It also noticeable that the number of request in person is the lowest.
At first, the quality of information get by telephone takes up around 850.While the number of that in person is about 410.Moreover, the resquest of using letter as well as email is higher than in person in January.
The figure for the requests for information in person increases from march to June by 800 to 2000 request. By contrast, the quality of people who use letter or email decreases remarkably from January to June, but it remains unchanged from may to june. On the other hand, the number of people using by telephone drops the lowest in Febuary but then It jumps from march to June

The chart below illustrate the quality of a tourist office in United Kingdom from January to June
In general, It can be seen from the chart that the tourist office witnessed a slightly decrease in request by letter or email.Besides, It also noticeable that the number of request in person is the lowest.
At first, the quality of information get by telephone takes up around 850.While the number of that in person is about 410.Moreover, the resquest of using letter as well as email is higher than in person in January.
The figure for the requests for information in person increases from march to June by 800 to 2000 request. By contrast, the quality of people who use letter or email decreases remarkably from January to June, but it remains unchanged from may to june. On the other hand, the number of people using by telephone drops the lowest in Febuary but then It jumps from march to June

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

Errors and Improvements:

1. "illustrate" -> "illustrates"
   Explanation: "Illustrate" should agree with the subject "chart," which is singular, so it should be conjugated as "illustrates."

2. "slightly decrease" -> "a slight decrease"
   Explanation: "Slightly decrease" lacks the appropriate article. "A slight decrease" is a more grammatically correct phrase.

3. "It also noticeable" -> "It is also noticeable"
   Explanation: "It also noticeable" lacks the verb "is." Adding "is" makes the sentence grammatically correct.

4. "At first" -> "Initially"
   Explanation: "At first" is a common phrase but using "Initially" adds variety and sophistication to the writing.

5. "the quality of information get by telephone" -> "the number of inquiries received by telephone"
   Explanation: "The quality of information get by telephone" is awkward and unclear. "Inquiries" is a more appropriate term for requests or questions made over the phone.

6. "that in person" -> "those made in person"
   Explanation: "That in person" lacks clarity. "Those made in person" specifies the requests made face-to-face.

7. "Moreover, the resquest of using letter as well as email" -> "Moreover, the number of requests made via letter or email"
   Explanation: "Resquest of using letter as well as email" is unclear and grammatically incorrect. "Requests made via letter or email" is clearer and more concise.

8. "from march to June" -> "from March to June"
   Explanation: Months should be capitalized.

9. "people who use letter or email" -> "individuals using letters or emails"
   Explanation: "People who use letter or email" lacks clarity and proper grammar. "Individuals using letters or emails" is clearer and more grammatically correct.

10. "but it remains unchanged from may to june" -> "but it remains unchanged from May to June"
    Explanation: Months should be capitalized.

11. "using by telephone" -> "using the telephone"
    Explanation: "Using by telephone" is awkward and grammatically incorrect. "Using the telephone" is the correct phrase.

12. "drops the lowest" -> "reaches its lowest point"
    Explanation: "Drops the lowest" is awkward. "Reaches its lowest point" is clearer and more precise.

13. "but then It jumps" -> "but then it jumps"
    Explanation: "It" should not be capitalized. It’s not the start of a new sentence.

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 3

[
Band Score: 3.0
Explanation: The essay attempts to address the task by describing the trends in requests for information at a tourist office in the UK from January to June. However, the response lacks coherence and clarity. There are significant grammatical errors and unclear expressions throughout the essay, making it difficult to follow. Additionally, the essay fails to provide a clear overview or highlight key features effectively.
How to improve: Focus on improving sentence structure and clarity of expression. Ensure coherence and logical progression of ideas throughout the essay. Provide a clear overview of the main trends and highlight key features more effectively. Use appropriate vocabulary and grammar to enhance clarity and accuracy. Proofread the essay thoroughly to eliminate grammatical errors and improve readability.]

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 4

Band Score: 4.0

Explanation: The essay presents some information but lacks coherence and progression. There is no clear organization of ideas, resulting in a disjointed flow. The use of cohesive devices is limited and repetitive, with some inaccuracies. Paragraphing is inconsistent, making it difficult to follow the essay’s structure.

How to improve: Focus on organizing ideas logically, ensuring a clear progression throughout the essay. Use a variety of cohesive devices appropriately to connect sentences and paragraphs. Clearly separate different points into paragraphs to improve readability and coherence. Additionally, pay attention to grammatical accuracy and clarity of expression to enhance overall coherence and cohesion.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 4

Band Score: 4.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary and lacks precision in expression. There are several inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as "the quality of a tourist office" which could be better phrased as "the performance of a tourist office" or "the services provided by a tourist office." Additionally, there are repetitive phrases and awkward constructions throughout the essay. Spelling and word formation errors, like "resquest" instead of "request" and "febuary" instead of "February," contribute to the lack of clarity and coherence.

How to improve: To improve the lexical resource, focus on expanding vocabulary and using more precise and appropriate language. Utilize synonyms and varied expressions to avoid repetition. Pay close attention to spelling and word formation to enhance readability and coherence. Proofreading the essay for errors and refining the language would greatly enhance its clarity and effectiveness. Additionally, familiarizing oneself with common collocations and idiomatic expressions related to the topic could further enrich the lexical resource.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 3

Band Score: 3.0

Explanation:
The essay demonstrates an attempt to convey information about a chart illustrating the quality of a tourist office in the UK from January to June. However, numerous grammatical errors and inaccuracies significantly distort the clarity and effectiveness of communication. Sentence structures lack complexity and coherence, with frequent errors in grammar and punctuation. For instance, there are issues with subject-verb agreement ("the chart below illustrate"), article usage ("a slightly decrease"), and word choice ("get" instead of "received"). Additionally, there are inconsistencies in verb tenses ("the quality… take… the number… is… it also noticeable… the figure… increases… it jumps"), and awkward phrasing ("quality of people who use letter or email"). These errors make it challenging for the reader to comprehend the intended message.

How to improve:

1. Focus on sentence structure and coherence: Use a variety of sentence structures to enhance clarity and flow. Ensure that each sentence contributes to the overall coherence of the essay.
2. Grammar and punctuation: Pay close attention to grammar rules and punctuation marks to minimize errors. Review subject-verb agreement, verb tense consistency, and article usage.
3. Word choice and phrasing: Choose precise and appropriate words to convey meaning accurately. Avoid awkward phrasing by proofreading and revising sentences for clarity.
4. Practice writing: Regularly practice writing tasks to improve grammatical accuracy and sentence structure. Seek feedback from peers or instructors to identify areas for improvement.

Bài sửa mẫu

The provided chart illustrates the quality of services provided by a tourist office in the United Kingdom from January to June. Overall, it is evident from the chart that there was a slight decrease in requests received via letter or email. Additionally, it is notable that requests made in person were the least frequent.

Initially, the telephone was the most common method of obtaining information, with approximately 850 requests, whereas only about 410 requests were made in person. Moreover, the number of requests made via letter or email exceeded those made in person in January.

The number of requests made in person experienced a steady increase from March to June, reaching 2000 requests, an increase of 800 from March. In contrast, the number of requests via letter or email decreased significantly from January to June, although it remained stable from May to June. On the other hand, the number of requests made via telephone reached its lowest point in February, but then saw a substantial increase from March to June.