The diagram below shows the life cycle of a frog. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows the life cycle of a frog.
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram illustrates the main stages in the development of a frog growing from eggs to mature adults.
Overall, the life cycle of a frog involves five main stages commencing with eggs, going through metamorphosis, and culminating in an adult form. The development occurs in both aquatic and terrestrial environments.
At the beginning of the life cycle, after mating, the female frogs lay a large number of eggs, known as frogspawn in the water. These eggs then hatch and small tadpoles emerge. In time, the tadpoles grow with longer tails, and their hind legs are formed.
In the following stage of the process, tadpoles develop into young frogs with four limbs and a shorter tail. Other body parts including their head and trunk also can be clearly distinguished. The development continues until young frogs fully grow to mature form and their tail disappear. These mature frogs then move from water onto the ground to find a partner for mating and the life cycle begins anew.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"The diagram illustrates the main stages in the development of a frog growing from eggs to mature adults." -> "The diagram depicts the primary stages in the development of a frog from eggs to maturity."
Explanation: Replacing "illustrates" with "depicts" provides a more precise term for visual representations, and "maturity" is a more formal term than "mature adults," aligning better with academic style.
"going through metamorphosis" -> "undergoing metamorphosis"
Explanation: "Undergoing" is more formal and precise than "going through," which is somewhat colloquial for academic writing.
"culminating in an adult form" -> "culminating in adulthood"
Explanation: "Adulthood" is a more formal and concise term than "an adult form," which sounds awkward and less precise in this context.
"The development occurs in both aquatic and terrestrial environments." -> "Development occurs in both aquatic and terrestrial environments."
Explanation: Removing the definite article "the" before "development" corrects the grammatical error and maintains the formal tone.
"after mating, the female frogs lay" -> "following mating, female frogs lay"
Explanation: Removing "the" before "female frogs" corrects the grammatical error and streamlines the sentence structure for clarity and formality.
"a large number of eggs, known as frogspawn" -> "a large number of eggs, commonly referred to as frogspawn"
Explanation: "Commonly referred to as" is more precise and formal than "known as," which is somewhat vague and less formal.
"In time, the tadpoles grow with longer tails, and their hind legs are formed." -> "Over time, the tadpoles develop longer tails and form hind legs."
Explanation: "Over time" is a more formal expression than "In time," and "develop" and "form" are more precise verbs for describing the growth process.
"Other body parts including their head and trunk also can be clearly distinguished." -> "Additionally, other body parts, such as the head and trunk, become more distinct."
Explanation: "Additionally" is more formal than "also," and "become more distinct" is a more precise and formal way to describe the development of body parts.
"The development continues until young frogs fully grow to mature form and their tail disappear." -> "The development continues until young frogs fully mature, at which point their tails disappear."
Explanation: "Fully mature" is a more formal expression than "fully grow to mature form," and "at which point" is a more precise temporal indicator than "until."
"These mature frogs then move from water onto the ground to find a partner for mating and the life cycle begins anew." -> "These mature frogs then transition from aquatic to terrestrial environments to locate a mate for reproduction, thereby initiating the life cycle anew."
Explanation: "Transition from aquatic to terrestrial environments" is more precise and formal than "move from water onto the ground," and "locate a mate for reproduction" is more specific and formal than "find a partner for mating."

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 7

Band Score: 7

Explanation: The essay covers all the requirements of the task and presents a clear overview of the main stages in the life cycle of a frog. The essay also clearly presents and highlights key features/bullet points, such as the development of the tadpole and the emergence of hind legs. However, the essay could be more fully extended by providing more detail about the changes that occur in each stage of the life cycle.

How to improve: The essay could be improved by providing more detail about the changes that occur in each stage of the life cycle. For example, the essay could mention that the tadpole develops gills and a tail, and that the young frog develops lungs and legs. The essay could also provide more information about the environment in which each stage of the life cycle takes place. For example, the essay could mention that the eggs are laid in water, and that the tadpoles live in water, while the young frogs and mature frogs live on land.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0
Explanation: The essay arranges information and ideas coherently, presenting a clear overall progression from the initial stage of the frog’s life cycle to the final stage. However, while cohesive devices are used effectively, there are instances where cohesion between sentences could be improved, leading to a slightly mechanical flow. The essay does use paragraphing, but the organization within paragraphs could be more logical, particularly in the transitions between stages of development.
How to improve: To enhance coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on using a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas more fluidly, avoiding repetition. Additionally, improving the logical flow of information by ensuring that each paragraph clearly transitions to the next stage in the life cycle would strengthen the overall organization. Finally, ensuring that each paragraph has a clear central topic and that supporting details are logically sequenced would further improve the score.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0
Explanation: The essay demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary relevant to the task, using terms such as "metamorphosis," "frogspawn," and "tadpoles." However, the vocabulary used is mostly straightforward, and while there are attempts to incorporate less common terms, they are not consistently accurate or sophisticated. There are some errors in word choice and phrasing, such as "their tail disappear," which should be "their tails disappear," indicating a lack of control in word formation. Overall, the vocabulary is sufficient for the task, but it lacks the precision and variety needed for a higher band score.
How to improve: To enhance the lexical resource score, the writer should aim to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary, particularly less common and more precise terms related to biological processes. Additionally, ensuring grammatical accuracy in word forms and collocations will improve clarity. Practicing the use of synonyms and varying sentence structures can also contribute to a more sophisticated lexical range.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0
Explanation: The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, which is characteristic of a Band 6. While it communicates the main features of the frog’s life cycle effectively, there are noticeable grammatical errors and some awkward phrasing that detracts from the overall clarity. For example, phrases like "the tail disappear" should be corrected to "the tail disappears," and "other body parts including their head and trunk also can be clearly distinguished" could be more smoothly phrased. These errors, while not severely hindering communication, indicate a need for improvement in grammatical accuracy and control.
How to improve: To achieve a higher band score, the writer should focus on enhancing grammatical accuracy by proofreading for common errors and refining sentence structures for clarity. Incorporating a wider range of complex sentences and ensuring that all verb forms and subject-verb agreements are correct will also help improve the overall grammatical range and accuracy. Additionally, practicing with more varied vocabulary and structures will contribute to a more sophisticated writing style.

Bài sửa mẫu

The diagram illustrates the main stages in the development of a frog, growing from eggs to mature adults. Overall, the life cycle of a frog involves five main stages, commencing with eggs, progressing through metamorphosis, and culminating in the adult form. The development occurs in both aquatic and terrestrial environments.

At the beginning of the life cycle, after mating, female frogs lay a large number of eggs, known as frogspawn, in the water. These eggs then hatch, and small tadpoles emerge. Over time, the tadpoles grow, developing longer tails, and their hind legs begin to form.

In the subsequent stage of the process, tadpoles develop into young frogs, characterized by four limbs and a shorter tail. Other body parts, including the head and trunk, can also be clearly distinguished. The development continues until young frogs fully mature, at which point their tails disappear. These mature frogs then move from the water onto the ground to find partners for mating, and the life cycle begins anew.