The maps below show an industrial area in the town of Norbiton, and planned future development of the site. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

The maps below show an industrial area in the town of Norbiton, and planned future development of the site.
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

The diagram illustrates an industrial zone in Norbiton and the improvemental location will be planned in the future.
Overall, it is apparent that the increasing of houses when replacing a lot of factories to live and survive. Moreover, more facilities built surrounding houses to provide the best service for all of citizens here.
Right now, surrounding a roundbout are factories. Moreover, more then five factories along a street. At that time, people pay attention to workng and we do not have a statergy to remake again this area. Similarity to East, only factories and road appear entirely. A long river with a huge farmland to apply their rountine demands.
However, in many years future, the massive differences give themselves the better life. At that now, a lot of factories before will be altered into houses and shops here. Besides, 2 roads are established and new places for some entertainment as medical centre, playground and also schools. To expand the street, they build a smaller roundbout at South to be conivinent. Especially, they seperate the rive to build bridge and enhance their life. Not only moving farmland to East North, but they also build more houses here for citizens.


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

Errors and Improvements:

  1. "improvemental" -> "developmental"
    Explanation: "Improvemental" is not a standard English word. "Developmental" is a more appropriate term to describe the future planning

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 4

[
Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay attempts to address the task but does not cover all key features or bullet points. While the essay discusses some changes and identifies certain features, it often lacks clarity, coherence, and accurate description. The key differences between the current and future plans are not consistently highlighted. The structure and organization are somewhat unclear, and some parts are repetitive or inaccurate. There are several grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, which also impact the clarity of the response.

How to improve: To improve the task achievement, the essay should focus on presenting a clear overview of the changes between the current industrial area and the future development plan. It would be helpful to accurately describe the layout and discuss key features such as the new roads, facilities, and housing, making comparisons where relevant. Additionally, attention to grammatical accuracy and overall coherence would contribute to a clearer response. Avoiding repetition and irrelevant details will also improve the focus and organization.
]

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 4

Band Score:Band Score: Band Score: 4

Band Score: 4.Band Score: 4

**Band Score: 4.0Band Score: 4

ExplanationBand Score**: 4.0

Band Score: 4

Explanation:Band Score: 4.0

**Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essayBand Score: 4.0

ExplanationBand Score**: 4

Explanation: The essay presentsBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents someBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
TheBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some informationBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents someBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial areaBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some informationBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in NorBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information aboutBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in NorbitBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrialBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton andBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in NorBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and theBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in NorbitBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned futureBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton andBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future developmentBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and plannedBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development.Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned futureBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. HoweverBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future developmentBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However,Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development,Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization isBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, butBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lackingBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization isBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence andBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lackingBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progressionBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence andBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. TheBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion.Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumpsBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. IdeasBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps betweenBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas areBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed mannerBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses withoutBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner,Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitionsBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, withBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions,Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progressionBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leadingBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression andBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading toBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions betweenBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusionBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is noBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion.Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structureBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. AdditionallyBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure toBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion asBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to theBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as theBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay,Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the useBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, andBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devicesBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lackBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basicBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic andBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphingBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimesBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing furtherBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurateBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributesBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. TheBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to theBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essayBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficultyBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacksBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty inBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in followingBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphingBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following theBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing andBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flowBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structureBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow ofBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure,Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information.Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, makingBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. AdditionallyBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making itBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally,Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challengingBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, thereBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to followBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there areBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow theBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errorsBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flowBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors inBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow ofBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion,Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideasBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, withBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive languageBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

**Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficientBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improveBand Score**: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesiveBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherenceBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices toBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence andBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connectBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesionBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideasBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion,Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logicallyBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, theBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writerBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

**Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focusBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How toBand Score**: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus onBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improveBand Score**: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizingBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve**Band Score**: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideasBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:
Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logicallyBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:
1Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with aBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:
1.Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clearBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. OrganizationBand Score**: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughoutBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin byBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay.Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. UsingBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuringBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriateBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring theBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitionalBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essayBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrasesBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay withBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases canBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with anBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smoothBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction,Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth theBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, bodyBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitionsBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphsBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts.Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, andBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. AdditionallyBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph shouldBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally,Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focusBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employingBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus onBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing aBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specificBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devicesBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspectBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectivelyBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the informationBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively,Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information providedBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, suchBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
    Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such asBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
    2.Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. **Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns,Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. CohBand Score**: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctionBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. CohesionBand Score**: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions,Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion:Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, andBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: UseBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitionalBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesiveBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrasesBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devicesBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases,Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such asBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhanceBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctionBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance theBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctionsBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivityBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions,Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity betweenBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitionsBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentencesBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, andBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphsBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronounsBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs.Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns toBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to linkBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphingBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideasBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing shouldBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas withinBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should beBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within andBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented toBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentencesBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separateBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences.Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinctBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences. Avoid repetitiveBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinct ideas,Band Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences. Avoid repetitive language andBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinct ideas, andBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences. Avoid repetitive language and ensureBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinct ideas, and attentionBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences. Avoid repetitive language and ensure thatBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinct ideas, and attention shouldBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences. Avoid repetitive language and ensure that eachBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinct ideas, and attention should be paidBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences. Avoid repetitive language and ensure that each sentence contributesBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinct ideas, and attention should be paid toBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences. Avoid repetitive language and ensure that each sentence contributes toBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinct ideas, and attention should be paid to maintaining consistencyBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences. Avoid repetitive language and ensure that each sentence contributes to theBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinct ideas, and attention should be paid to maintaining consistency inBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences. Avoid repetitive language and ensure that each sentence contributes to the overall coherenceBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinct ideas, and attention should be paid to maintaining consistency in verbBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences. Avoid repetitive language and ensure that each sentence contributes to the overall coherence ofBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinct ideas, and attention should be paid to maintaining consistency in verb tenseBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences. Avoid repetitive language and ensure that each sentence contributes to the overall coherence of theBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinct ideas, and attention should be paid to maintaining consistency in verb tense usageBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences. Avoid repetitive language and ensure that each sentence contributes to the overall coherence of the essayBand Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinct ideas, and attention should be paid to maintaining consistency in verb tense usage throughoutBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences. Avoid repetitive language and ensure that each sentence contributes to the overall coherence of the essay.
    Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinct ideas, and attention should be paid to maintaining consistency in verb tense usage throughout theBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences. Avoid repetitive language and ensure that each sentence contributes to the overall coherence of the essay.
    3Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinct ideas, and attention should be paid to maintaining consistency in verb tense usage throughout the essayBand Score: 4.0

Explanation:
The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and planned future development, but the organization is lacking coherence and cohesion. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, with unclear progression and transitions between them. There is no clear structure to the essay, and the lack of paragraphing further contributes to the difficulty in following the flow of information. Additionally, there are errors in cohesion, with repetitive language and insufficient use of cohesive devices to connect ideas logically.

How to improve:

  1. Organization: Begin by structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the information provided.
  2. Cohesion: Use cohesive devices such as conjunctions, transitions, and pronouns to link ideas within and between sentences. Avoid repetitive language and ensure that each sentence contributes to the overall coherence of the essay.
    3.Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay presents some information about the industrial area in Norbiton and the planned future development. However, the organization is lacking coherence and progression. The essay jumps between present and future tenses without clear transitions, leading to confusion. Additionally, there are issues with cohesion as the use of cohesive devices is basic and sometimes inaccurate. The essay lacks clear paragraphing and structure, making it challenging to follow the flow of ideas.

How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on organizing ideas logically with a clear progression throughout the essay. Using appropriate transitional phrases can help smooth the transitions between different time frames and concepts. Additionally, employing a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as pronouns, conjunctions, and transitional phrases, can enhance the connectivity between sentences and paragraphs. Clear paragraphing should be implemented to separate distinct ideas, and attention should be paid to maintaining consistency in verb tense usage throughout the essay.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5.0

Explanation:
The essay demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary, with some noticeable errors in word choice and word formation. For example, "improvemental" should be "developmental," "statergy" should be "strategy," "rountine" should be "routine," "conivinent" should be "convenient," and "seperate" should be "separate." Additionally, there are instances where the use of vocabulary is repetitive, such as the repeated use of "factories" and "houses."

The essay attempts to convey information about the transformation of an industrial area into a residential and commercial zone in Norbiton. It briefly describes the current state of the industrial area with factories and roads, and then outlines the planned future development, including the conversion of factories into houses and shops, the construction of new roads, and the addition of amenities like medical centers, playgrounds, and schools. However, the lack of variety in vocabulary and the errors in word choice and formation make the essay difficult to follow at times and limit its effectiveness in conveying precise meanings.

How to improve:
To improve the lexical resource, the writer should focus on expanding their vocabulary and using words more accurately. They should also pay attention to word choice and avoid repetitive use of the same words. Proofreading the essay carefully to correct errors in spelling and word formation would also help enhance the lexical quality of the writing. Additionally, using more varied and sophisticated vocabulary related to urban planning and development would add depth and clarity to the essay.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 4

Band Score: 4.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates an attempt to use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but there are numerous grammatical errors and issues with punctuation throughout the text. The essay lacks consistency in grammatical accuracy and structure, which affects the overall coherence and readability.

How to improve: To improve the grammatical range and accuracy, focus on sentence structure and use a wider variety of sentence forms. Additionally, pay attention to grammar rules and punctuation to ensure clearer communication. Proofreading the essay for errors before submission is essential to enhance clarity and coherence.

Bài sửa mẫu

The diagrams depict the current layout of an industrial area in Norbiton, alongside proposed developments for the future.

Overall, the transformation of the area is evident, with a shift from predominantly industrial to residential and commercial purposes. Initially, the landscape comprises factories surrounding a roundabout, with over five factories lining a street. Notably, there is a river and extensive farmland to the east, catering to agricultural needs.

In the envisioned future, significant changes are foreseen, aimed at enhancing the quality of life for residents. Former industrial sites will undergo conversion into residential dwellings and commercial establishments, including shops. Additionally, infrastructure improvements are planned, including the construction of two new roads and amenities such as a medical center, playgrounds, and schools. To facilitate smoother traffic flow, a smaller roundabout will be introduced to the south. Moreover, efforts will be made to improve connectivity by building bridges over the river. Furthermore, there will be a relocation of farmland to the northeast, making room for additional housing developments.

In summary, the future development plans for the Norbiton industrial area indicate a transition towards a more residentially and commercially focused environment, accompanied by enhancements in infrastructure and amenities.

Bài viết liên quan

Phản hồi

Email của bạn sẽ không được hiển thị công khai. Các trường bắt buộc được đánh dấu *

IELTS Writify

Chấm IELTS Writing Free x GPT

Lưu ý

Sắp bảo trì server

Để đảm bảo tính ổn định của web, web sẽ thực hiện backup dữ liệu hàng ngày từ 3h-3h30 sáng

Rất mong quý thầy cô và học viên thông cảm vì bất tiện này