The pie chart shows the proportion of international students in Japan, by nationality, in 2023. The graph compares the number of Chinese students and Vietnamese students in Japan from 2015 to 2023. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write about 150 words.

The pie chart shows the proportion of international students in Japan, by nationality, in 2023. The graph compares the number of Chinese students and Vietnamese students in Japan from 2015 to 2023. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write about 150 words.

The given pie chart and line graph report on the key findings of a survey among international students currently studying in Japan, which first aims to compare the amount of students by country of origin, context in the year 2023 and then to report the amount of Chinese and Vietnamese students from the year 2015 to 2023 over a period of 8 years commencing in 2015.

Based on the report, given, Chinese students were for some way the most represented among international students in Japan, surpassing Vietnamese students by 3% in students from no other category by a notable amount. The amount is likely to increase.

Moving onto the line graph, by 2015, the number of Chinese students was 80,000, which remarkably rose to a peak of 120,000 students in 2022 and is projected to approach 120,000 in 2023. The trend of growth overall was starting 2015 with about 5000 Vietnamese students gradually rose to 100,000 students in 2018. This growth would continue till 2023, when Chinese and Vietnamese students will make up over 50,000 students making it to 100,000.


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

  1. "The given pie chart and line graph report" -> "The provided pie chart and line graph present"
    Explanation: "The given" is somewhat informal and vague; "provided" is more precise and formal, and "present" is more appropriate for academic writing than "report."

  2. "which first aims to compare" -> "which initially seeks to compare"
    Explanation: "Aims" is somewhat informal and vague; "seeks" is more precise and formal, fitting better in academic contexts.

  3. "context in the year 2023" -> "context in 2023"
    Explanation: Removing "the year" is redundant and simplifies the phrase, making it more concise and formal.

  4. "for some way" -> "to some extent"
    Explanation: "For some way" is an incorrect idiom; "to some extent" is the correct idiomatic expression and is appropriate for formal writing.

  5. "surpassing Vietnamese students by 3% in students from no other category by a notable amount" -> "exceeding those from other countries by a significant margin"
    Explanation: The original phrase is convoluted and unclear. The revised version is clearer and maintains a formal tone.

  6. "The amount is likely to increase" -> "the trend is expected to continue"
    Explanation: "The amount is likely to increase" is vague and informal; "the trend is expected to continue" is more precise and formal, fitting academic style.

  7. "remarkably rose to a peak of 120,000 students" -> "significantly increased to a peak of 120,000 students"
    Explanation: "Remarkably" is an emotional term and less formal; "significantly" is neutral and suitable for academic writing.

  8. "is projected to approach 120,000" -> "is anticipated to reach 120,000"
    Explanation: "Approach" implies getting close but not necessarily reaching; "reach" is more definitive and precise in this context.

  9. "starting 2015" -> "beginning in 2015"
    Explanation: "Starting" is informal and vague; "beginning" is more precise and formal.

  10. "gradually rose to 100,000 students" -> "steadily increased to 100,000 students"
    Explanation: "Gradually" is somewhat informal and vague; "steadily" is more specific and formal, suitable for academic writing.

  11. "This growth would continue till 2023" -> "This growth is expected to continue through 2023"
    Explanation: "Would continue till" is informal and less precise; "is expected to continue through" is more formal and clear.

  12. "making it to 100,000" -> "reaching 100,000"
    Explanation: "Making it to" is informal and colloquial; "reaching" is straightforward and formal, fitting the academic style.

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 4

Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay attempts to address the task but does not cover all key features/bullet points. The essay does not provide a clear overview of the main features of the pie chart and line graph. The essay also includes irrelevant information, such as the statement that the amount of Chinese students is "likely to increase."

How to improve: The essay could be improved by providing a clearer overview of the main features of the pie chart and line graph. The essay should also focus on reporting factual information from the visuals and avoid making assumptions or predictions. The essay should also be more concise and avoid unnecessary repetition.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng:

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng:

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng:

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