A lot of students in VietNam prefer going to university to attending vocational courses although they know that the labor market lacks skillful workers.What are the causes of this fact ? Suggest solutions
A lot of students in VietNam prefer going to university to attending vocational courses although they know that the labor market lacks skillful workers.What are the causes of this fact ? Suggest solutions
In this day and age, the tendency of students in VietNam opting for further education in college rather than vocational programs is greater, while some raise concerns whether there is enough skillful workforce for the job market or not. This essay will give underlying reasons regarding the importance of educational certification and specialized knowledge derived from university curriculum. Certain steps should be made to balance it out.
The decision that students after high school make is to further their education by entering college, instead of participating in vocational courses, despite knowing the lack of skilled manpower in today's market. The foremost reason is that people come to a realization that a university degree is of importance in applying for Big 4 companies specialized in their major, leading the next generation to value education from university and set a bachelor’s degree as a fundamental standard of a professional worker. As time progressed, society demands a worker at least graduating from college to recruit them, resulting in the instillment in mindset of students going to university rather than vocational curriculums.
In addition, after years receiving specialized knowledge and practicing soft skills that are needed in a working environment, graduates develop their personality and ability to enter the workplace without any obstacles or confusion.Especially, there are certain typical professions such as doctor, nurse or any medical-related jobs that must require a long period of time in medical university enough to readily treating patients and ensuring other people’s health in the future. People working in the medical field are equipped with a set of skills and knowledge that are complex, transferable and applicable so that it can be applied in any emergency.Without university education, new graduates from high school would struggle with adjusting themselves to the working cycle although they are not mentally and physically prepared for the competitive market. Thereby, the average 3 to 4 years in college will set a firm foundation in terms of knowledge, networking and skills for a person to enter the labor market.
Going to vocational courses is the option that students resort to if they fail to pass the university entrance examination. As for the value of a certification from vocational courses, people are limited in what they would do in the future and narrow their promotion’s paths. Additionally, the nature of vocational education is inclined to train individuals to be employed and prepare with practical skills in a specific field which often relate to manual labor such as sewing, technical or trading factories.It is estimated that people earn a poor living and find difficulty to pass the initial round of recruitment as university college overweighs in facets that society demands. As a result, in spite of lacking skilled individuals in the market, in fact people still place much value in college degrees more than vocational programs to satisfy the needs of current job markets regarding education. However, every choice that students make still is valid and personalized according to their purposes and goals in life, therefore, governments should take an action to balance it out and make it accessible for everyone to education regardless of what types of education it is. Vocational courses will be more available for students who are underprivileged wanting to access practical education to make ends meet if there is financial support from the authorities and a campaign that businesses should be raised aware not to discriminate and create equal employment opportunities for everyone. Last but not least, the lack of skilled individuals in the job market should be resolved by adding more practical knowledge and programmover theoretical ones in curriculum to prompt graduates to readily enter the competitive field.
In conclusion, there are underlying rationales why individuals choose university over vocational programs to fit in with this rapidly evolving job market and high demand of corporations. The lack of skilled individuals in job market is still a current concern that people need to delve deeply into and certain approaches need to be made for a well-rounded job market in the long run.
Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng
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"In this day and age" -> "Currently"
Explanation: "In this day and age" is a somewhat informal and clichéd expression. "Currently" is more concise and maintains an academic tone. -
"opting for further education in college" -> "pursuing higher education at colleges"
Explanation: "Pursuing higher education at colleges" is more precise and formal, avoiding the redundancy of "further education in college." -
"there is enough skillful workforce" -> "there is a sufficient skilled workforce"
Explanation: "Sufficient" is more formal and precise than "enough," and "skilled" is the correct adjective form. -
"certain steps should be made" -> "certain measures should be taken"
Explanation: "Measures" is more specific and formal than "steps" in this context, and "taken" is the correct verb form. -
"people come to a realization" -> "individuals realize"
Explanation: "Individuals realize" is more direct and formal, avoiding the passive construction "come to a realization." -
"a university degree is of importance" -> "a university degree is important"
Explanation: "Important" is a more straightforward and formal adjective than "of importance." -
"set a bachelor’s degree as a fundamental standard" -> "establish a bachelor’s degree as a fundamental standard"
Explanation: "Establish" is more precise and formal than "set," and the article "a" before "bachelor’s degree" is correct. -
"instillment in mindset" -> "instillation of the mindset"
Explanation: "Instillation of the mindset" corrects the grammatical error and enhances formality. -
"vocational curriculums" -> "vocational curricula"
Explanation: "Curricula" is the correct plural form for educational programs. -
"practicing soft skills" -> "developing soft skills"
Explanation: "Developing" is more accurate in this context, as it implies growth and improvement rather than mere practice. -
"enter the workplace without any obstacles or confusion" -> "enter the workplace without encountering obstacles or confusion"
Explanation: "Encountering" is more precise and formal than "without any obstacles or confusion." -
"instillment in mindset" -> "instillation of the mindset"
Explanation: Corrects the grammatical error and enhances formality. -
"typical professions" -> "typical professions such as"
Explanation: Adding "such as" clarifies that the examples are representative, not exhaustive. -
"must require a long period of time in medical university" -> "require a prolonged period of study at medical universities"
Explanation: "Prolonged period of study" is more specific and formal, and "at medical universities" corrects the plural form. -
"enough to readily treating patients" -> "sufficient to effectively treat patients"
Explanation: "Sufficient" and "effectively" are more precise and formal than "enough" and "readily." -
"new graduates from high school would struggle" -> "new high school graduates would struggle"
Explanation: "New high school graduates" is more concise and formal. -
"mentally and physically prepared" -> "mentally and physically prepared"
Explanation: This is a correction to maintain parallel structure and formality. -
"the average 3 to 4 years in college" -> "the typical 3-4 year college tenure"
Explanation: "Typical 3-4 year college tenure" is more formal and precise. -
"Going to vocational courses" -> "Enrolling in vocational courses"
Explanation: "Enrolling" is more formal and specific than "going to." -
"people are limited in what they would do in the future" -> "individuals are restricted in their future prospects"
Explanation: "Restricted in their future prospects" is more formal and precise. -
"narrow their promotion’s paths" -> "narrow their career paths"
Explanation: "Career paths" is a more specific and formal term than "promotion’s paths." -
"often relate to manual labor" -> "often involve manual labor"
Explanation: "Involve" is more accurate in describing the type of work involved. -
"people earn a poor living" -> "individuals earn a meager income"
Explanation: "Meager income" is a more formal and precise term than "poor living." -
"find difficulty to pass the initial round of recruitment" -> "face challenges in the initial recruitment process"
Explanation: "Face challenges in the initial recruitment process" is more formal and precise. -
"university college overweighs" -> "university education outweighs"
Explanation: "University education" is the correct term, and "outweighs" is the
Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8
Band Score for Task Response: 8
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Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both parts of the prompt: it explores the reasons why students in Vietnam prefer university education over vocational courses and suggests potential solutions to the issue of a lack of skilled workers in the labor market. The reasons provided, such as societal perceptions of university degrees and the necessity of specialized knowledge for certain professions, are relevant and well-articulated. The solutions proposed, including financial support for vocational education and increased awareness among businesses, demonstrate a clear understanding of the prompt’s requirements.
- How to improve: To enhance the comprehensiveness of the response, the essay could benefit from a more explicit connection between the causes and the solutions. For instance, when discussing the societal preference for university degrees, the essay could suggest specific campaigns or educational reforms that could shift perceptions. Additionally, providing more concrete examples of successful vocational programs in other countries could strengthen the argument for solutions.
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Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position that emphasizes the importance of university education while acknowledging the need for vocational training. The argument is consistent throughout, as it highlights the societal values that drive students toward universities and the implications of this trend on the labor market. However, there are moments where the language could be more assertive regarding the necessity of balancing both educational paths.
- How to improve: To reinforce the position, the writer could use more definitive language when discussing the importance of vocational training. For example, instead of stating that "every choice that students make still is valid," the essay could assert that "both educational paths are essential for a balanced workforce." This would provide a stronger, more authoritative stance on the issue.
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Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents several well-developed ideas regarding the reasons for students’ preferences and the implications of these choices. The discussion of the importance of a university degree, particularly in fields like medicine, is well-supported with relevant examples. However, some ideas could be further extended, particularly the discussion on the limitations of vocational education.
- How to improve: To improve the development of ideas, the writer should aim to provide more detailed examples or statistics that illustrate the benefits of vocational education. For instance, citing specific job placement rates for vocational graduates compared to university graduates could provide a more nuanced view of the labor market dynamics. Additionally, expanding on the proposed solutions with examples of successful initiatives could enhance the persuasiveness of the argument.
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Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the reasons for students’ preferences and the implications for the labor market. However, there are instances where the discussion becomes slightly convoluted, particularly in the latter half of the essay, where the focus shifts to the need for practical knowledge in curricula without a clear transition from the previous points.
- How to improve: To maintain a tighter focus, the writer should ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly and relates back to the central thesis. Using clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph can help guide the reader and reinforce the main argument. Additionally, summarizing the key points at the end of each section could help to maintain clarity and coherence throughout the essay.
Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong understanding of the task and effectively communicates the complexities of the issue, meriting a high band score. With some refinements in clarity and depth, it could achieve an even higher score.
Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7
Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7
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Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The introduction effectively outlines the topic and states the intent of the essay. Each body paragraph addresses specific reasons for students’ preference for university education over vocational courses, providing relevant examples. However, the flow between some ideas could be improved. For instance, the transition from discussing the importance of a university degree to the challenges faced by vocational students feels somewhat abrupt, which may confuse the reader.
- How to improve: To enhance logical organization, consider using clearer topic sentences for each paragraph that directly relate back to the thesis statement. Additionally, employing transitional phrases at the beginning of each paragraph can help guide the reader through the argument more smoothly, ensuring that each point builds on the previous one.
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Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay uses paragraphs effectively, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct aspect of the topic. However, some paragraphs are overly long and contain multiple ideas that could be separated for clarity. For example, the second body paragraph discusses both the societal demand for university graduates and the specific requirements of certain professions, which could be split into two distinct paragraphs for better readability.
- How to improve: Aim for a clear topic sentence at the beginning of each paragraph that encapsulates the main idea. This will help in maintaining focus within each paragraph. Consider breaking longer paragraphs into smaller ones to avoid overwhelming the reader and to allow for a more digestible presentation of ideas.
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Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable use of cohesive devices, such as conjunctions and referencing words (e.g., "thereby," "however," "in addition"). These devices help to connect ideas and maintain the flow of the essay. However, the range of cohesive devices could be expanded. Some sentences feel repetitive in structure, which can detract from the overall cohesiveness of the essay.
- How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, incorporate a wider variety of linking words and phrases (e.g., "furthermore," "consequently," "on the other hand"). Additionally, varying sentence structures can enhance cohesion; for instance, using subordinate clauses or different types of connectors can create a more engaging reading experience.
By addressing these areas for improvement, the essay can achieve a higher level of coherence and cohesion, ultimately leading to a stronger overall score in this criterion.
Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6
Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6
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Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, with terms such as "specialized knowledge," "skillful workforce," and "practical skills" effectively conveying the main ideas. However, there are instances of repetition, particularly with phrases like "university education" and "vocational courses," which could be varied to enhance the richness of the vocabulary. Additionally, some word choices, such as "overweighs," are awkward and detract from the overall clarity.
- How to improve: To improve vocabulary range, the writer should incorporate synonyms and related terms to avoid redundancy. For example, instead of repeatedly using "university," alternatives like "higher education" or "tertiary education" could be employed. Furthermore, exploring more sophisticated vocabulary related to the topic, such as "apprenticeship" or "career-oriented training," would enhance the essay’s lexical diversity.
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Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: While the essay includes some precise vocabulary, there are notable instances of imprecise usage. For example, the phrase "the average 3 to 4 years in college will set a firm foundation" could be more accurately expressed as "the typical duration of 3 to 4 years in higher education provides a solid foundation." Additionally, the term "overweighs" is incorrectly used in the context of comparing the value of degrees, which should be replaced with "outweighs."
- How to improve: To enhance precision, the writer should focus on contextually appropriate word choices. Reviewing vocabulary in context and utilizing resources like thesauruses or academic word lists can help identify more suitable terms. Moreover, practicing paraphrasing sentences to improve clarity and precision will benefit the overall quality of the writing.
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Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several spelling errors, such as "VietNam" (should be "Vietnam"), "programover" (should be "program over"), and "certification" (used correctly but could be confused with "certificate"). These errors, while not numerous, can disrupt the reader’s understanding and detract from the professionalism of the writing.
- How to improve: To improve spelling accuracy, the writer should implement a proofreading strategy that includes reading the essay aloud and using spell-check tools. Additionally, maintaining a list of commonly misspelled words and practicing them can help solidify correct spelling in future writing. Engaging in regular writing exercises that emphasize spelling can also contribute to overall improvement.
In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and employs a satisfactory range of vocabulary, there are areas for improvement in terms of variety, precision, and spelling accuracy. By addressing these aspects, the writer can enhance the overall quality of their lexical resource in future IELTS essays.
Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7
Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7
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Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good variety of sentence structures, including complex sentences and some compound sentences. For instance, phrases like "the tendency of students in VietNam opting for further education in college rather than vocational programs" and "the average 3 to 4 years in college will set a firm foundation in terms of knowledge, networking and skills for a person to enter the labor market" show an ability to construct longer, more intricate sentences. However, there are instances of awkward phrasing and run-on sentences that detract from clarity, such as "the nature of vocational education is inclined to train individuals to be employed and prepare with practical skills in a specific field which often relate to manual labor such as sewing, technical or trading factories."
- How to improve: To enhance the range and effectiveness of sentence structures, consider varying the length and complexity of sentences more deliberately. Use shorter sentences for clarity and impact, especially when presenting key ideas. Additionally, ensure that complex sentences are well-structured to avoid confusion. Breaking down overly long sentences into clearer, more digestible parts can improve readability.
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Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally maintains a good level of grammatical accuracy, but there are notable errors that affect the overall quality. For example, phrases like "the instillment in mindset of students going to university rather than vocational curriculums" could be rephrased for grammatical correctness and clarity. Additionally, punctuation issues are present, such as missing commas that could help clarify meaning, particularly in longer sentences. For instance, "without any obstacles or confusion.Especially," should have a space after the period.
- How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, a thorough proofreading process is essential. Pay attention to common grammatical issues, such as subject-verb agreement and article usage. For punctuation, practice using commas to separate clauses and improve sentence flow. Reading the essay aloud can help identify awkward phrasing and punctuation errors, allowing for revisions that enhance clarity and coherence.
Overall, the essay demonstrates a solid command of grammatical range and accuracy, but with focused attention on sentence structure variety and grammatical precision, it could achieve a higher band score.
Bài sửa mẫu
In this day and age, the tendency of students in Vietnam to opt for further education at colleges rather than vocational programs is increasing, while some raise concerns about whether there is a sufficient skilled workforce for the job market. This essay will explore the underlying reasons regarding the importance of educational certification and specialized knowledge derived from university curricula. Certain measures should be taken to address this imbalance.
The decision that students make after high school is to pursue higher education by entering college instead of enrolling in vocational courses, despite knowing the lack of skilled manpower in today’s market. The foremost reason is that individuals realize that a university degree is important when applying for positions at major companies, leading the next generation to value education from universities and establish a bachelor’s degree as a fundamental standard for professional workers. As time progresses, society demands that workers at least graduate from college to be considered for recruitment, resulting in the instillation of the mindset among students to prioritize university over vocational curricula.
In addition, after years of receiving specialized knowledge and developing soft skills needed in a working environment, graduates enhance their personalities and abilities to enter the workplace without encountering obstacles or confusion. Particularly, there are certain typical professions, such as doctors and nurses, which require a prolonged period of study at medical universities to ensure they are sufficiently prepared to effectively treat patients and safeguard public health. Individuals working in the medical field are equipped with a complex set of skills and knowledge that are transferable and applicable in emergencies. Without a university education, new high school graduates would struggle to adjust to the working cycle, as they may not be mentally and physically prepared for the competitive market. Therefore, the typical 3 to 4-year college tenure provides a solid foundation in terms of knowledge, networking, and skills for individuals entering the labor market.
Vocational courses are often seen as an option for students who fail to pass the university entrance examination. However, the value of a certification from vocational courses can be limited, restricting individuals in their future prospects and narrowing their career paths. Additionally, the nature of vocational education is inclined to train individuals for specific employment, often involving manual labor in fields such as sewing, technical work, or trading factories. It is estimated that individuals earn a meager income and face challenges in the initial recruitment process, as university education outweighs vocational training in the aspects that society demands. Consequently, despite the lack of skilled individuals in the market, people still place a higher value on college degrees compared to vocational programs to meet the educational requirements of current job markets.
However, every choice that students make is valid and personalized according to their purposes and goals in life. Therefore, governments should take action to create a more balanced educational landscape and make education accessible for everyone, regardless of the type. Vocational courses could become more available for underprivileged students seeking practical education to improve their livelihoods if there is financial support from authorities and a campaign to raise awareness among businesses about the importance of equal employment opportunities. Lastly, the shortage of skilled individuals in the job market should be addressed by incorporating more practical knowledge into curricula, rather than focusing solely on theoretical content, to better prepare graduates for the competitive field.
In conclusion, there are underlying reasons why individuals choose university over vocational programs to align with the rapidly evolving job market and the high demand from corporations. The lack of skilled individuals in the job market remains a pressing concern that requires deeper exploration, and certain approaches must be implemented to foster a well-rounded job market in the long run.