benefits of doing homework
benefits of doing homework
There are many advantages of doing housework. First, doing housework helps improve heart health, and increase fitness. Secondly, doing chores also helps people relaxation. For instance, When i go through a tiring study session, doing housework will provide a sense of satisfaction, reduce stress, and comfort. Thirdly, doing chores helps us develop life skills. when we do housework, what we learn from them is time management skills , independence, responsibility, which is especially important for children. Last but not least, doing chores together helps strengthen family bonds, creating special moments between children and parents. in other words, it makes children feel they are members of a team. in summary, doing homework has many benefits so we should do housework.
Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng
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"There are many advantages of doing housework." -> "There are numerous benefits to performing household tasks."
Explanation: Replacing "advantages of doing housework" with "benefits to performing household tasks" refines the language by using a more precise term ("benefits") and specifying the type of tasks ("household tasks"), which enhances the academic tone. -
"doing housework helps improve heart health, and increase fitness" -> "engaging in household chores can improve cardiovascular health and enhance physical fitness"
Explanation: "Engaging in household chores" is more formal than "doing housework," and "cardiovascular health" is a more specific and medically accurate term than "heart health." Additionally, "enhance" is more formal than "increase." -
"doing chores also helps people relaxation" -> "performing household tasks also promotes relaxation"
Explanation: "Performing household tasks" is more formal than "doing chores," and "promotes" is a more precise verb than "helps" in this context. -
"When i go through a tiring study session, doing housework will provide a sense of satisfaction, reduce stress, and comfort." -> "After a tiring study session, engaging in household tasks can provide a sense of satisfaction, alleviate stress, and promote comfort."
Explanation: "When i" should be "When I" for proper capitalization. "Engaging in household tasks" is more formal than "doing housework," and "alleviate" and "promote" are more precise verbs than "reduce" and "comfort." -
"doing chores helps us develop life skills" -> "engaging in household tasks fosters the development of life skills"
Explanation: "Fosters the development of" is a more formal and precise phrase than "helps us develop," and "engaging in household tasks" is more specific than "doing chores." -
"when we do housework, what we learn from them is time management skills, independence, responsibility" -> "when we engage in household tasks, we acquire skills such as time management, independence, and responsibility"
Explanation: "Acquire" is more formal than "learn from them," and "such as" is more appropriate than a comma after "skills." Also, "engage in household tasks" is more formal than "do housework." -
"Last but not least, doing chores together helps strengthen family bonds, creating special moments between children and parents." -> "Furthermore, performing household tasks together strengthens family bonds, creating special moments between children and parents."
Explanation: "Furthermore" is a more formal transitional phrase than "Last but not least," and "performing household tasks" is more precise than "doing chores." -
"in other words, it makes children feel they are members of a team." -> "in other words, this fosters a sense of teamwork among children."
Explanation: "This fosters a sense of teamwork among children" is more concise and formal than "it makes children feel they are members of a team." -
"doing homework has many benefits so we should do housework." -> "performing household tasks offers numerous benefits, thus it is essential to engage in this activity."
Explanation: "Offers numerous benefits" is more formal than "has many benefits," and "thus it is essential to engage in this activity" is more formal and precise than "so we should do housework."
Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 5
Band Score for Task Response: 5 – UNDER WORD
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Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay misinterprets the prompt by discussing "housework" instead of "homework." This fundamental misunderstanding leads to a failure in addressing the actual question about the benefits of doing homework. The points made about housework do not relate to the educational context of homework, which is crucial for a proper response.
- How to improve: To improve, the writer should carefully read the prompt and ensure they understand the specific topic being asked. They should focus on the benefits of homework, such as reinforcing learning, developing study habits, and improving time management skills. Each point should directly relate to the educational context of homework.
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Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay lacks a clear position regarding the benefits of homework. Instead, it presents a series of points about housework without establishing a coherent argument or stance. The mention of "doing homework" in the conclusion is misleading, as the body of the essay does not support this claim.
- How to improve: To maintain a clear position, the writer should explicitly state their viewpoint in the introduction and consistently refer back to it throughout the essay. Each paragraph should begin with a topic sentence that clearly relates to the benefits of homework, followed by supporting details that reinforce this position.
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Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The ideas presented in the essay are not well-developed or relevant to the topic. While the points about housework are somewhat clear, they lack depth and do not provide sufficient support or examples that would be relevant to the benefits of homework. For instance, discussing how homework reinforces classroom learning or helps students develop critical thinking skills would be more appropriate.
- How to improve: The writer should focus on presenting clear, relevant ideas related to homework. Each point should be elaborated with specific examples or explanations. For instance, discussing how completing homework can lead to better grades or improved understanding of subjects would strengthen the argument.
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Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay deviates significantly from the topic by discussing housework instead of homework. This lack of focus on the prompt results in an essay that does not meet the task requirements, ultimately leading to a lower score.
- How to improve: To stay on topic, the writer should outline their essay before writing, ensuring that each point directly addresses the prompt. They should also review their work to confirm that all content is relevant to the topic of homework and its benefits.
In summary, to improve the essay and potentially raise the band score, the writer should ensure they understand the prompt, maintain a clear and consistent position, develop relevant ideas with appropriate support, and stay focused on the topic of homework.
Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7
Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7
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Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction of the topic followed by several points that outline the benefits of doing housework. Each point is distinct and contributes to the overall argument. However, the transition between points could be smoother. For example, the shift from discussing health benefits to life skills lacks a clear linking phrase, which can disrupt the logical flow. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points but could be more impactful with a stronger closing statement.
- How to improve: To enhance logical organization, consider using transitional phrases between points, such as "In addition to improving health,…" or "Furthermore,…". This will help guide the reader through the argument more seamlessly. Additionally, a more defined introduction that outlines the main points to be discussed could provide a clearer roadmap for the essay.
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Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay lacks clear paragraphing, which is essential for separating distinct ideas. Currently, all points are presented in a single paragraph, making it difficult for readers to digest the information. Each benefit of doing housework could be developed in its own paragraph, allowing for more detailed explanations and examples.
- How to improve: Implement a clear paragraph structure by starting a new paragraph for each distinct benefit of doing housework. For instance, one paragraph could focus on health benefits, another on life skills, and a third on family bonding. This will not only improve readability but also allow for more in-depth discussion of each point.
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Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs some cohesive devices, such as "first," "secondly," and "last but not least," which help to signal the order of points. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat limited, and some sentences lack clear connections, such as the transition from discussing relaxation to life skills. Additionally, there are instances of grammatical errors that hinder cohesion, such as "when i go through a tiring study session," where "i" should be capitalized.
- How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, consider incorporating a wider range of linking words and phrases, such as "Moreover," "Additionally," and "On the other hand," to connect ideas more effectively. Furthermore, ensure grammatical accuracy to maintain cohesion; for example, always capitalize the pronoun "I" and ensure proper punctuation throughout the essay.
By addressing these areas for improvement, the essay can achieve a higher level of coherence and cohesion, potentially raising the band score in this criterion.
Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6
Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6
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Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, particularly in the context of discussing the benefits of doing housework. Phrases like "improve heart health," "sense of satisfaction," and "strengthen family bonds" indicate an attempt to use varied vocabulary. However, the use of synonyms is limited, and phrases are often repetitive, such as the frequent use of "doing housework" and "doing chores." This limits the overall lexical range.
- How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, the writer should incorporate synonyms and varied expressions. For example, instead of repeatedly using "doing housework," alternatives like "engaging in household tasks" or "performing domestic duties" could be utilized. Additionally, using more descriptive adjectives or adverbs could enrich the essay, such as "significantly improve heart health" or "greatly enhance family bonds."
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Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains some precise vocabulary, such as "time management skills" and "independence." However, there are instances of imprecise usage, particularly with the term "housework" when the prompt specifically asks about "homework." This misalignment indicates a misunderstanding of the topic, which affects the overall clarity and relevance of the essay.
- How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should ensure that the vocabulary used aligns closely with the essay prompt. In this case, focusing on the benefits of "homework" rather than "housework" is crucial. Additionally, the writer should consider the context of their vocabulary choices; for example, instead of saying "doing chores also helps people relaxation," a more precise phrasing would be "doing chores also promotes relaxation."
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Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay has several spelling errors, such as "i" (should be "I"), "when we do housework, what we learn from them is time management skills" (missing commas and awkward phrasing), and "important for children" (missing a space before "important"). These errors detract from the professionalism of the writing and can confuse the reader.
- How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, the writer should proofread their work carefully before submission. Utilizing spell-check tools and reading the essay aloud can help identify mistakes. Additionally, practicing common spelling rules and frequently misspelled words can build confidence in spelling accuracy. Keeping a list of commonly used vocabulary and their correct spellings can also be beneficial.
Overall, while the essay demonstrates an understanding of the topic and attempts to use varied vocabulary, improvements in precision, range, and spelling are necessary to achieve a higher band score.
Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5
Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 5
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Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay primarily employs simple sentence structures, such as "doing housework helps improve heart health" and "doing chores also helps people relaxation." While these sentences convey the main ideas, the lack of complex and varied sentence structures limits the overall effectiveness of the writing. For instance, the use of conjunctions to combine ideas is minimal, which could enhance the flow and coherence of the essay. Additionally, phrases like "last but not least" and "in other words" are used, indicating some attempt at variety, but they are not sufficient to demonstrate a wide range of grammatical structures.
- How to improve: To diversify sentence structures, the writer should practice incorporating complex sentences that include subordinate clauses. For example, instead of saying "doing chores helps us develop life skills," the writer could say, "By doing chores, children not only develop life skills but also learn the importance of responsibility and independence." This approach would enhance the essay’s complexity and make it more engaging.
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Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that detract from its clarity. For example, "doing chores also helps people relaxation" should be corrected to "doing chores also helps people relax." Additionally, there are capitalization errors, such as "When i go through a tiring study session," where "i" should be capitalized as "I." There are also instances of missing commas, such as before "which is especially important for children," which can lead to confusion in reading. The use of lowercase letters at the beginning of sentences, like "when we do housework," also indicates a lack of attention to grammatical conventions.
- How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should focus on proofreading their work to catch basic errors, particularly with capitalization and punctuation. Practicing sentence construction and reviewing grammar rules related to verb forms and sentence beginnings would also be beneficial. Additionally, using grammar-checking tools or seeking feedback from peers could help identify and correct mistakes before finalizing the essay.
Overall, while the essay presents relevant ideas about the benefits of doing housework, enhancing the variety of sentence structures and improving grammatical accuracy will significantly elevate the quality of the writing.
Bài sửa mẫu
There are numerous benefits to performing household tasks. First, engaging in household chores can improve cardiovascular health and enhance physical fitness. Secondly, performing household tasks also promotes relaxation. For instance, after a tiring study session, engaging in household tasks can provide a sense of satisfaction, alleviate stress, and promote comfort. Thirdly, engaging in household tasks fosters the development of life skills. When we engage in household tasks, we acquire skills such as time management, independence, and responsibility, which are especially important for children. Last but not least, performing household tasks together strengthens family bonds, creating special moments between children and parents. In other words, this fosters a sense of teamwork among children. In summary, performing household tasks offers numerous benefits; thus, it is essential to engage in this activity.