English is often considered the key to better job opportunities and higher education. Do the advantages of learning English outweigh the potential negative effects on local languages and cultures?

In recent times, it is usually believed that English is often deemed the key to better job opportunities and advanced education. In my opinion, its disadvantages could never overshadow its benefits.
First and foremost, people should recognize the fact that there are many advantages to learning English. There is no denying that if they learn other languages, especially English, they will have many job opportunities in other countries. It is obvious that in the global world, English becomes the languages popular so they proficiency have access to a wider range of job in multinational companies. For instance, many companies require their employees to communicate in English, that is necessary in careers. Furthermore, one further justification which should not be ignored here is that English allows them to approach a further their education. This means that when they learn English, they can study abroad and access higher-quality resources. A good case in point would be that studying in the USA, AUS,… the languages to communicate and learn are popular in English.
On the other hand, learning English has some disadvantages. It is important to remember that learning English can take less time. In other words, typically takes many years of practice all day to achieve fluency. For example, in Vietnam this is difficult for people who want to learn English, learners do not have a practice space and the high cost to learn. Additionally, the popularity of English can have a negative effect to local culture. Studying English could lead to decrease the using of the local language, particularly younger generations. For example, many children are approached to English language which lead to forgetting their local language.
In conclusion, it is safe to say that all the given factors have created the horns of a dilemma when people discuss the impacts of this problem. In my point of view, I agree by heart with all the advantages of learning other languages. It is not about English, studying languages and practicing it. Thus each of us should consider carefully before reaching the final decision on this issue.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"it is usually believed" -> "it is commonly believed"
Explanation: "Commonly" is a more precise and formal term than "usually," which enhances the academic tone of the statement.
"its disadvantages could never overshadow its benefits" -> "its disadvantages cannot overshadow its benefits"
Explanation: "Cannot" is more formal and precise than "could never," which is somewhat colloquial and less definitive in academic writing.
"people should recognize the fact that" -> "it is essential to acknowledge that"
Explanation: "It is essential to acknowledge" is more formal and emphasizes the necessity of recognition, which is more suitable for academic writing.
"there are many advantages to learning English" -> "there are numerous advantages to learning English"
Explanation: "Numerous" is a more precise and formal adjective than "many," which is somewhat vague and informal.
"especially English" -> "particularly English"
Explanation: "Particularly" is more formal and appropriate in academic contexts than "especially," which can sound casual.
"English becomes the languages popular" -> "English has become the most popular language"
Explanation: "Has become the most popular language" corrects the grammatical error and clarifies the meaning, making it more precise and formal.
"they proficiency have access" -> "they have access through their proficiency"
Explanation: Reordering the words improves grammatical correctness and clarity, making the sentence more formal and direct.
"that is necessary in careers" -> "which is essential in professional careers"
Explanation: "Essential" is more formal than "necessary," and specifying "professional careers" adds precision to the context.
"one further justification which should not be ignored here is that" -> "another significant justification is that"
Explanation: "Another significant justification" is more concise and formal than "one further justification which should not be ignored here," which is verbose and informal.
"approach a further their education" -> "further their education"
Explanation: "Further their education" corrects the awkward and incorrect phrase "approach a further their education," making it grammatically correct and more formal.
"It is important to remember that learning English can take less time" -> "It is crucial to note that learning English requires significant time"
Explanation: "Requires significant time" is more precise and formal than "can take less time," which is vague and informal.
"typically takes many years of practice all day" -> "typically requires extensive daily practice over many years"
Explanation: "Requires extensive daily practice over many years" is more precise and formal, avoiding the awkward and incorrect "practice all day."
"the high cost to learn" -> "the high cost of learning"
Explanation: "The high cost of learning" is grammatically correct and more formal than "the high cost to learn," which is awkward and informal.
"the popularity of English can have a negative effect to local culture" -> "the widespread use of English can negatively impact local culture"
Explanation: "Negatively impact" is a more precise and formal expression than "have a negative effect to," which is grammatically incorrect and informal.
"decrease the using of the local language" -> "reduce the use of the local language"
Explanation: "Reduce the use of" is grammatically correct and more formal than "decrease the using of," which is awkward and incorrect.
"approached to English language" -> "exposed to the English language"
Explanation: "Exposed to the English language" is grammatically correct and more formal than "approached to English language," which is incorrect and informal.
"I agree by heart with all the advantages" -> "I wholeheartedly agree with all the advantages"
Explanation: "Wholeheartedly agree" is a more formal and idiomatic expression than "agree by heart," which is not standard in formal writing.
"It is not about English, studying languages and practicing it" -> "It is not solely about English, but rather about studying languages and practicing them"
Explanation: "Not solely about" and "practicing them" corrects the awkward and informal original phrasing, enhancing clarity and formality.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Task Response: 7

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of learning English, which aligns with the prompt’s requirements. The author discusses job opportunities and educational benefits as advantages, while also mentioning the potential negative effects on local languages and cultures. However, the exploration of disadvantages lacks depth and specific examples, which could strengthen the argument. For instance, while the essay mentions that learning English can take time and resources, it does not elaborate on how this impacts individuals or communities.
- How to improve: To enhance this aspect, the author should ensure that each part of the question is explored in greater detail. Providing specific examples of how local languages are affected, or discussing the cultural implications of prioritizing English over local languages, would create a more balanced response.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The author presents a clear position in favor of learning English, stating that its advantages outweigh the disadvantages. However, the conclusion introduces some ambiguity with phrases like "the horns of a dilemma," which may confuse readers about the author’s stance. The inconsistency in expressing agreement with both sides can detract from the overall clarity.
- How to improve: To maintain a clear position, the author should consistently reinforce their viewpoint throughout the essay. Avoiding contradictory statements and ensuring that the conclusion reiterates the main argument without introducing new complexities will help solidify the stance.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents several ideas regarding the benefits of learning English, such as job opportunities and access to education. However, the support for these ideas is somewhat superficial. For example, the claim that English provides access to better job opportunities is made, but it lacks specific data or examples that could substantiate this claim. Additionally, the discussion of disadvantages is not fully developed, which weakens the overall argument.
- How to improve: To improve this area, the author should aim to provide more detailed examples and evidence to support their claims. Incorporating statistics or case studies about the impact of English on job markets or educational access would strengthen the argument. Additionally, elaborating on the disadvantages with concrete examples would create a more nuanced discussion.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, addressing the prompt directly. However, there are moments where the focus wavers, particularly in the discussion of disadvantages. The mention of "the high cost to learn" and "lack of practice space" could be more directly linked to the overall argument about the impact of English on local languages and cultures.
- How to improve: To maintain focus, the author should ensure that every point made directly relates back to the central question of whether the advantages of learning English outweigh the disadvantages. This can be achieved by explicitly connecting each point back to the prompt and avoiding tangential discussions that do not contribute to the main argument.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a clear position, it would benefit from deeper exploration of both advantages and disadvantages, more robust supporting evidence, and a stronger focus throughout the discussion.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear argument that English learning has advantages that outweigh its disadvantages. However, the organization of ideas could be improved. For instance, the transition from discussing the benefits of learning English to the disadvantages is somewhat abrupt. The first paragraph outlines the benefits but lacks a clear link to the subsequent paragraph discussing the drawbacks. The conclusion reiterates the main point but does not summarize the arguments effectively.
- How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using transitional phrases to guide the reader through the argument. For example, after discussing the advantages, a phrase like "However, it is also important to consider the potential drawbacks" could provide a smoother transition. Additionally, structuring the essay with clear topic sentences for each paragraph can help clarify the main idea being discussed.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay uses paragraphs, but their effectiveness varies. The first paragraph introduces the topic and presents the writer’s opinion, while the second paragraph discusses the advantages of learning English. However, the paragraph discussing disadvantages lacks a clear structure, making it harder to follow. The conclusion attempts to summarize but introduces new ideas rather than synthesizing the previous arguments.
- How to improve: Ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus. Start each paragraph with a topic sentence that encapsulates the main idea. For example, the disadvantages paragraph could begin with "Despite the numerous advantages, learning English also presents several challenges." This would help the reader understand the purpose of the paragraph immediately. Additionally, aim for a more cohesive conclusion that summarizes the key points discussed rather than introducing new concepts.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs some cohesive devices, such as "first and foremost," "on the other hand," and "for example." However, the range is limited, and some phrases are used awkwardly or incorrectly, such as "the languages popular" and "approach a further their education." This can disrupt the flow and clarity of the writing.
- How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, consider incorporating a wider variety of linking words and phrases. For instance, use "additionally," "furthermore," or "conversely" to enhance the connections between ideas. Additionally, ensure that phrases are grammatically correct and contextually appropriate. Practicing the use of cohesive devices in different contexts can help improve their effectiveness in your writing.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a clear viewpoint, focusing on improving the logical organization, paragraph structure, and the range of cohesive devices will enhance coherence and cohesion, potentially raising the band score in this criterion.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, but it tends to rely on common phrases and expressions. For instance, terms like "better job opportunities" and "higher-quality resources" are effective but somewhat basic. The phrase "the languages to communicate and learn are popular in English" lacks variety and could be expressed more creatively.
- How to improve: To enhance lexical range, the writer should incorporate more varied vocabulary and synonyms. For example, instead of repeating "learning English," alternatives like "acquiring English skills" or "mastering the English language" could be used. Additionally, using more sophisticated terms like "lingua franca" or "cultural hegemony" could elevate the essay’s language.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: There are instances of imprecise vocabulary usage that detract from clarity. For example, the phrase "English becomes the languages popular" is grammatically incorrect and unclear. The term "proficiency" is used incorrectly in "they proficiency have access," which disrupts the flow and meaning of the sentence.
- How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should ensure that vocabulary is not only appropriate but also grammatically correct. For instance, the sentence could be revised to "English has become a popular language," and "they proficiency have access" could be corrected to "they will have proficiency and access." Regular practice with vocabulary exercises focusing on context can also help improve precision.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several spelling errors, such as "AUS" (should be "Australia") and "decrease the using of the local language" (should be "decrease the use of the local language"). These errors can confuse the reader and undermine the writer’s credibility.
- How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, the writer should take time to proofread their work carefully. Utilizing spell-check tools and reading the essay aloud can help catch errors. Additionally, keeping a personal list of commonly misspelled words and practicing them can be beneficial.

Overall, while the essay meets the basic requirements for lexical resource, there is significant room for improvement in vocabulary range, precision, and spelling accuracy. By focusing on these areas, the writer can enhance the overall quality of their writing and potentially achieve a higher band score in future assessments.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 5

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates some variety in sentence structures, such as simple sentences ("In my opinion, its disadvantages could never overshadow its benefits.") and compound sentences ("For example, many companies require their employees to communicate in English, that is necessary in careers."). However, the range is limited, and many sentences are awkwardly constructed or repetitive. For instance, phrases like "learning English can take less time" and "it is important to remember that learning English can take less time" could be more effectively varied.
- How to improve: To enhance the variety of sentence structures, the writer should incorporate more complex sentences and varied conjunctions. For example, instead of repeating similar sentence beginnings, they could use introductory clauses or phrases (e.g., "Although learning English has its challenges, the benefits are significant."). Additionally, using passive voice or conditional sentences could add depth (e.g., "If students invest time in learning English, they may find better job opportunities.").
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that detract from clarity. For example, "English becomes the languages popular so they proficiency have access to a wider range of job" is grammatically incorrect and confusing. The phrase "that is necessary in careers" should be restructured for clarity. Additionally, punctuation errors, such as the misuse of commas in "For instance, many companies require their employees to communicate in English, that is necessary in careers," lead to run-on sentences.
- How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should review subject-verb agreement and sentence structure. For instance, "English becomes the languages popular" should be corrected to "English has become a popular language." Furthermore, practicing punctuation rules, especially regarding commas and conjunctions, will enhance clarity. The writer could benefit from breaking down complex ideas into simpler sentences to avoid run-ons and ensure each sentence conveys a clear idea.

In summary, while the essay presents a relevant argument and some varied structures, it falls short in both the range of grammatical structures and accuracy. Focusing on sentence variety and grammatical correctness will significantly improve the overall quality of the writing.

Bài sửa mẫu

In recent times, it is commonly believed that English is the key to better job opportunities and advanced education. In my opinion, its disadvantages cannot overshadow its benefits.

First and foremost, it is essential to acknowledge that there are numerous advantages to learning English. There is no denying that if individuals learn other languages, particularly English, they will have access to a wider range of job opportunities in various countries. It is obvious that in today’s globalized world, English has become the most popular language, allowing those who are proficient to secure positions in multinational companies. For instance, many organizations require their employees to communicate in English, which is essential in professional careers. Furthermore, another significant justification is that English enables individuals to further their education. This means that when they learn English, they can study abroad and access higher-quality resources. A good case in point would be studying in the USA or Australia, where the primary languages of instruction are English.

On the other hand, learning English does come with some disadvantages. It is crucial to note that learning English requires significant time and effort. Typically, achieving fluency necessitates extensive daily practice over many years. For example, in Vietnam, it can be challenging for individuals who wish to learn English, as many learners lack a practice environment and face high costs associated with education. Additionally, the widespread use of English can negatively impact local culture. Studying English could lead to a reduction in the use of local languages, particularly among younger generations. For example, many children are exposed to the English language, which may result in them forgetting their local language.

In conclusion, it is safe to say that all the given factors create a dilemma when discussing the impacts of this issue. In my view, I wholeheartedly agree with the advantages of learning English and other languages. It is not solely about English, but rather about studying languages and practicing them. Thus, each of us should consider carefully before reaching a final decision on this matter.