International tourism has brought enormous benefits to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the environment. Do the disadvantages of international tourism outweigh the advantages?

International tourism has brought enormous benefits to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the environment.
Do the disadvantages of international tourism outweigh the advantages?

As people's living standard rise, there is growing demand for entertainment and tourism, particularly international travel. This surge can bring significat benefits and enhance the reputation of various regions. In this answer, I am going to examine the pros and cons of this trend. While there are lots of good points of traveling abroard, I believe there are still be certain negative effects of this.
Some commentators have noted the advantages of international tourism. To begin with, an influx of tourists can significantly boost the local economy, as increased visitors numbers lead to greater demand for goods and services. For instance, when a destination gains fame through media coverage for its stunning beaches or unique attractions, it naturally draws curious travelers. This heightened interest drives up demand for food, lodgingg, and others devices, resulting in growth for restaurants and hotels. Secondly, the national culture will be promoted widely through international friends when they come and experience the country's identity. For example, global travlers are often thrilled to participate in Vietnam's long-standing festivals and try to play a variety of fascinating folk games unfamiliar to them, or attracted by the rich of Vietnamese cuisine. They frequently share their impressions of Vietnam's beauty and hospitality with others. Consequently, this economic and culture activities contribute to a rise in annual GDP and supports national development.
However, the enhancement in the number of visitors can lead to some worrying issues. Balancing economic gains with enviromental sustainability is becoming a critical challenge for many regions. Firstly, there are numerous types of pollution can be occured such air pollution, noise pollution, etc. In other words, the demand for travel via cars, planes, and trains is rising, resulting in an increase in toxic gas emissions that contribute to air polition. As a matter of fact, it also caused a serious overuse of natural resources. Secondly, the progression of tourism is one of the main reasons for the habitat destruction. The construction of toursim infrastructure can destroy natural habitat and threaten wildlife. For example, building resorts and camping areas in mountainous regions can disrupt the living spaces of wild animals such as monkeys and birds.
In conclusion, while the rise in international tourist numbers can offer lots of advantages to regions, it also poses a threat to enviromental sustainability.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"As people’s living standard rise" -> "As people’s living standards rise"
Explanation: The correct form is "standards" instead of "standard" to refer to the general level of living conditions among a population.
"significat" -> "significant"
Explanation: Corrects a typographical error to ensure the word is spelled correctly.
"lots of good points of traveling abroard" -> "numerous benefits of traveling abroad"
Explanation: "Numerous benefits" is more formal and precise than "lots of good points," and "abroad" should be spelled correctly.
"still be certain negative effects of this" -> "there are still certain negative effects of this"
Explanation: Corrects the grammatical structure to ensure proper sentence formation.
"Some commentators have noted the advantages of international tourism." -> "Some commentators have highlighted the advantages of international tourism."
Explanation: "Highlighted" is a more precise verb choice than "noted" in this context, emphasizing the act of drawing attention to the advantages.
"increased visitors numbers" -> "increased visitor numbers"
Explanation: "Visitor" should be singular to match the singular verb "increased."
"lodgingg" -> "lodgings"
Explanation: Corrects a typographical error to ensure the word is spelled correctly.
"others devices" -> "other devices"
Explanation: Corrects a grammatical error by removing the unnecessary "s" after "other."
"the national culture will be promoted widely through international friends" -> "the national culture will be promoted widely through international friendships"
Explanation: "Friendships" is the correct noun form to describe relationships between nations, and "international" is more appropriate than "friends" in this context.
"global travlers" -> "global travelers"
Explanation: Corrects a typographical error to ensure the word is spelled correctly.
"rich of Vietnamese cuisine" -> "rich Vietnamese cuisine"
Explanation: Removes the incorrect preposition "of" to correctly describe the richness of Vietnamese cuisine.
"economic and culture activities" -> "economic and cultural activities"
Explanation: "Cultural" is the correct adjective form to describe activities related to culture.
"enviromental sustainability" -> "environmental sustainability"
Explanation: Corrects a typographical error to ensure the word is spelled correctly.
"types of pollution can be occured" -> "types of pollution that can occur"
Explanation: Corrects grammatical structure to "that can occur" for proper clause formation.
"air polition" -> "air pollution"
Explanation: Corrects a typographical error to ensure the word is spelled correctly.
"it also caused a serious overuse of natural resources" -> "it also leads to the serious overuse of natural resources"
Explanation: "Leads to" is a more precise verb choice than "caused" in this context, indicating a continuous effect.
"progression of tourism is one of the main reasons for the habitat destruction" -> "progression of tourism is a major reason for habitat destruction"
Explanation: "A major reason" is more concise and formal than "one of the main reasons," and "habitat destruction" is a more direct and formal term.
"construction of toursim infrastructure" -> "construction of tourism infrastructure"
Explanation: Corrects a typographical error to ensure the word is spelled correctly.
"threaten wildlife" -> "threaten wildlife populations"
Explanation: Adding "populations" clarifies the intended meaning of the impact on wildlife.
"lots of advantages" -> "numerous advantages"
Explanation: "Numerous" is more formal and precise than "lots of" in academic writing.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Task Response: 7

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of international tourism, which is essential for responding to the prompt. The author discusses economic benefits, such as boosting local economies and promoting culture, while also highlighting environmental concerns and habitat destruction. However, the essay could have more explicitly weighed the advantages against the disadvantages to directly answer whether the disadvantages outweigh the advantages.
- How to improve: To enhance this aspect, the writer should clearly state their position regarding whether the disadvantages outweigh the advantages in the introduction and conclusion. Additionally, providing a more balanced analysis with specific examples that illustrate both sides more thoroughly would strengthen the response.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear position that acknowledges both sides of the argument but lacks a definitive stance on whether the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. The phrase "I believe there are still be certain negative effects of this" suggests some recognition of the negatives, yet it does not strongly assert that they outweigh the positives.
- How to improve: To present a clearer position, the writer should explicitly state their viewpoint in the introduction and reinforce it throughout the essay. Using phrases like "In my opinion, the disadvantages significantly outweigh the advantages" would provide clarity. Additionally, the conclusion should reiterate this stance more forcefully.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents several ideas, such as economic benefits and environmental issues, but some points lack depth and specific supporting details. For example, while the economic benefits are discussed, the environmental impacts could be elaborated with more concrete examples or statistics to strengthen the argument.
- How to improve: To improve, the writer should aim to extend their ideas further by providing more detailed examples and explanations. For instance, discussing specific case studies of regions affected by tourism could illustrate the points more vividly. Additionally, integrating data or expert opinions could lend credibility to the arguments presented.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the pros and cons of international tourism. However, there are moments where the discussion could be more focused. For instance, the mention of "global travelers" and their experiences, while relevant, could be more directly tied to the argument about the impact of tourism on local culture and economy.
- How to improve: To maintain focus, the writer should ensure that every point made is directly relevant to the question of whether the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. This can be achieved by consistently linking back to the central argument in each paragraph and avoiding tangential information that does not directly support the thesis.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents relevant arguments, it would benefit from a clearer stance, more detailed support for ideas, and a tighter focus on the prompt.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs discussing both advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. The introduction sets the context for the discussion, and the body paragraphs are organized to first address the benefits of international tourism before moving on to the drawbacks. However, the transition between the advantages and disadvantages could be smoother. For example, the phrase "However, the enhancement in the number of visitors can lead to some worrying issues" serves as a transition but could be more explicitly linked to the previous paragraph’s content to enhance logical flow.
- How to improve: To improve logical organization, consider using clearer transition phrases that connect the ideas between paragraphs. For instance, after discussing the benefits, a sentence like "Despite these advantages, it is crucial to consider the potential negative impacts that accompany increased tourism" would provide a more seamless transition.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the argument. The first body paragraph discusses the benefits, while the second addresses the drawbacks. However, the paragraphs could be strengthened by ensuring that each begins with a clear topic sentence that encapsulates the main idea of the paragraph. For example, the first body paragraph could start with a sentence like "International tourism offers several significant advantages that can enhance local economies and cultural exchange."
- How to improve: To enhance paragraph structure, ensure that each paragraph begins with a strong topic sentence that clearly states the main idea. Additionally, consider using concluding sentences that summarize the main point of each paragraph and link back to the overall argument of the essay.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs some cohesive devices, such as "To begin with," "Secondly," and "In conclusion," which help to guide the reader through the argument. However, there is a limited range of cohesive devices used, and some phrases are repeated, such as "for example," which appears multiple times in similar contexts. This repetition can detract from the overall fluency of the essay.
- How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, consider incorporating a wider range of linking words and phrases. For instance, instead of repeatedly using "for example," you could use alternatives like "for instance," "such as," or "to illustrate." Additionally, using devices that indicate contrast, such as "on the other hand" or "in contrast," can enhance the clarity of your argument when discussing the disadvantages of tourism.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a coherent argument, improvements in logical transitions, paragraph structure, and the variety of cohesive devices will enhance the overall coherence and cohesion, potentially raising the band score.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, with terms like "influx," "boost," "promoted," and "sustainability" showing an attempt to use varied language. However, there are instances of repetition and limited variation in word choice, particularly in phrases like "good points of traveling abroad" and "rise in international tourist numbers," which could be expressed with more sophistication.
- How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, the writer should incorporate synonyms and related terms. For example, instead of repeatedly using "rise," alternatives like "increase," "surge," or "growth" could be employed. Additionally, exploring more advanced vocabulary related to tourism and its impacts, such as "ecotourism," "cultural exchange," or "economic influx," would enrich the essay.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: While the essay includes some precise vocabulary, there are notable imprecisions. For instance, the phrase "the rich of Vietnamese cuisine" is awkward and unclear; it should be "the richness of Vietnamese cuisine" or "the variety of Vietnamese cuisine." Furthermore, the term "devices" in "resulting in growth for restaurants and hotels" is vague and does not accurately convey the intended meaning.
- How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should focus on using vocabulary that accurately reflects the intended meaning. Revising phrases for clarity and correctness is essential. For example, replacing "devices" with "services" would enhance clarity. Additionally, the writer should consider the context in which terms are used to ensure they fit logically and semantically.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several spelling errors, such as "significat" (significant), "abroard" (abroad), "lodgingg" (lodging), "travlers" (travelers), "enviromental" (environmental), "polition" (pollution), and "toursim" (tourism). These errors detract from the overall professionalism of the writing and can confuse the reader.
- How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, the writer should implement proofreading strategies, such as reading the essay aloud or using spell-check tools before submission. Additionally, practicing spelling through writing exercises and flashcards for commonly misspelled words can help reinforce correct spelling. Keeping a list of frequently used terms and their correct spellings could also be beneficial for future essays.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a foundational understanding of lexical resource, improvements in vocabulary range, precision, and spelling will be crucial for achieving a higher band score.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 6

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a moderate range of sentence structures. For instance, the use of complex sentences is evident in phrases like "While there are lots of good points of traveling abroad, I believe there are still be certain negative effects of this." However, there are instances of repetitive structures, such as the frequent use of "can" and "is," which limits the overall variety. Additionally, the essay relies heavily on simple and compound sentences, which can make the writing feel less sophisticated.
- How to improve: To diversify sentence structures, the writer should incorporate more complex and compound-complex sentences. For example, instead of saying "The construction of tourism infrastructure can destroy natural habitat," the writer could say, "Although the construction of tourism infrastructure can provide economic benefits, it often leads to the destruction of natural habitats." This not only adds variety but also enhances clarity and engagement.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that detract from its overall clarity. For example, "significat" should be "significant," and "lodgingg" contains a typographical error. Additionally, phrases like "there are numerous types of pollution can be occured" are grammatically incorrect; it should be "there are numerous types of pollution that can occur." Punctuation errors, such as missing commas in complex sentences, also affect readability.
- How to improve: To enhance grammatical accuracy, the writer should proofread their work carefully to catch typographical errors and ensure correct word forms are used. Practicing sentence construction can help avoid common mistakes, such as subject-verb agreement and the correct use of modals. Furthermore, using punctuation effectively, especially in complex sentences, will improve the overall flow of the essay. For example, adding commas before conjunctions in compound sentences can clarify the relationship between clauses.

Overall, while the essay presents a clear argument and addresses the prompt effectively, focusing on diversifying sentence structures and improving grammatical accuracy will help elevate the writing to a higher band score.

Bài sửa mẫu

As people’s living standards rise, there is a growing demand for entertainment and tourism, particularly international travel. This surge can bring significant benefits and enhance the reputation of various regions. In this essay, I am going to examine the pros and cons of this trend. While there are numerous advantages to traveling abroad, I believe there are still certain negative effects of this.

Some commentators have noted the advantages of international tourism. To begin with, an influx of tourists can significantly boost the local economy, as increased visitor numbers lead to greater demand for goods and services. For instance, when a destination gains fame through media coverage for its stunning beaches or unique attractions, it naturally draws curious travelers. This heightened interest drives up demand for food, lodgings, and other devices, resulting in growth for restaurants and hotels. Secondly, the national culture will be promoted widely through international friendships when they come and experience the country’s identity. For example, global travelers are often thrilled to participate in Vietnam’s long-standing festivals and try to play a variety of fascinating folk games unfamiliar to them, or they are attracted by the richness of Vietnamese cuisine. They frequently share their impressions of Vietnam’s beauty and hospitality with others. Consequently, these economic and cultural activities contribute to a rise in annual GDP and support national development.

However, the increase in the number of visitors can lead to some worrying issues. Balancing economic gains with environmental sustainability is becoming a critical challenge for many regions. Firstly, there are numerous types of pollution that can occur, such as air pollution and noise pollution. In other words, the demand for travel via cars, planes, and trains is rising, resulting in an increase in toxic gas emissions that contribute to air pollution. As a matter of fact, it also leads to the serious overuse of natural resources. Secondly, the progression of tourism is one of the main reasons for habitat destruction. The construction of tourism infrastructure can destroy natural habitats and threaten wildlife. For example, building resorts and camping areas in mountainous regions can disrupt the living spaces of wild animals such as monkeys and birds.

In conclusion, while the rise in international tourist numbers can offer numerous advantages to regions, it also poses a threat to environmental sustainability.