Many students find it harder to study when they are at university or college than when they were at school. Why is this? What can be done to solve the problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Many students find it harder to study when they are at university or college than when they were at school.
Why is this?
What can be done to solve the problem?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
There is little doubt that when transitioning from higher-secondary schools to universities, teenagers usually find it more difficult to absorb knowledge. In recent years, this state of affairs can be attributed to a harder and deeper level of curriculum in tertiary education compared with that in schools. However, some effective solutions that we can adopt to remedy this situation will be outlined in this essay.
There are some contributors to the difficulties that students meet in their studies. Chief of these is that the specialized subject that a student chose when attending his or her university often contains more difficult and denser knowledge engenders challenges in how he or she acquires it. These difficulties, in turn, may cause students to be confused and disheartened as they did not use to such a specialized level of knowledge in lower education, where the curriculum is more generalised. Another factor is the changes in the environment from schools to colleges in terms of the lack of interaction with lecturers and peers. Due to the increase in size of the classroom in universities, teenagers will lack communicating and contact with their teachers and friends, which consequently results in their academic performance being worsened, discouraging them from learning.
All these problems mentioned above, however, can be addressed in a number of ways. Key of that is for a university to introducing a more comprehensive orientation which supports students in the form of directing the correct method to learn. A university, for example, provides its students with effective skills for their study, say, time management and decision-making skills may force teenagers to focus on what is more significant, leading to an ease for them to learn. Furthermore, both colleges and students themselves can apply them in a more efficient environment of learning. For instance, a university would encourage students to interact with their peers by establishing clubs or to give them advice by setting up faculty office hours, meanwhile, teenagers would by themselves create groups of discussion and learning. All of which in turn would give rise to a greater level of competition and motivation for students, rendering the lack of interaction with lecturers insignificant.
In conclusion, the fact that teenagers usually find it harder to study in universities compared with in schools can be ascribed to the deeper curriculum at the tertiary level and the inefficiency of interaction with teachers and peers. The answers would lie in for universities implementing orrientation programmes to their students and for students and colleges as a whole establishing clubs or groups for higher level of competition and motivation.
Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng
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"teenagers usually find it more difficult" -> "adolescents typically encounter greater challenges"
Explanation: "Teenagers usually find it more difficult" is somewhat informal for an academic context. "Adolescents typically encounter greater challenges" maintains the intended meaning while using more formal language. -
"a harder and deeper level of curriculum" -> "a more rigorous and profound academic curriculum"
Explanation: "Harder and deeper" is somewhat colloquial. "Rigorous and profound" maintains the idea of increased difficulty in a more formal manner. -
"some effective solutions that we can adopt" -> "effective strategies that can be implemented"
Explanation: "Some effective solutions that we can adopt" is a bit informal. "Effective strategies that can be implemented" is more formal and academically appropriate. -
"difficulties that students meet" -> "challenges encountered by students"
Explanation: "Difficulties that students meet" is somewhat informal. "Challenges encountered by students" maintains formality and clarity. -
"contains more difficult and denser knowledge engenders challenges" -> "encompasses more complex and dense subject matter, posing challenges"
Explanation: "Contains more difficult and denser knowledge engenders challenges" is awkwardly phrased. "Encompasses more complex and dense subject matter, posing challenges" conveys the idea more smoothly and formally. -
"as they did not use to such a specialized level of knowledge" -> "as they were not accustomed to such a specialized level of knowledge"
Explanation: "As they did not use to such a specialized level of knowledge" is grammatically incorrect. "As they were not accustomed to such a specialized level of knowledge" is grammatically correct and more formal. -
"where the curriculum is more generalised" -> "where the curriculum is more generalized"
Explanation: "Generalised" is the British English spelling; "generalized" is the preferred spelling in academic writing, particularly in American English. -
"communicating and contact" -> "communication and contact"
Explanation: "Communicating and contact" is grammatically incorrect. "Communication and contact" is the correct form. -
"their academic performance being worsened, discouraging them from learning" -> "resulting in deteriorating academic performance, which discourages them from learning"
Explanation: "Their academic performance being worsened, discouraging them from learning" is awkwardly structured. "Resulting in deteriorating academic performance, which discourages them from learning" is more clear and formal. -
"can be addressed in a number of ways" -> "can be addressed through various means"
Explanation: "In a number of ways" is somewhat informal. "Through various means" is more formal and precise. -
"Key of that is for a university to introducing a more comprehensive orientation" -> "Central to this is for universities to introduce a more comprehensive orientation"
Explanation: "Key of that is for a university to introducing" is grammatically incorrect. "Central to this is for universities to introduce" is grammatically correct and more formal. -
"which supports students in the form of directing the correct method to learn" -> "which guides students in adopting effective learning strategies"
Explanation: "Supports students in the form of directing the correct method to learn" is unclear and awkward. "Guides students in adopting effective learning strategies" is clearer and more formal. -
"may force teenagers to focus on what is more significant" -> "may compel adolescents to prioritize"
Explanation: "May force teenagers to focus on what is more significant" is somewhat informal. "May compel adolescents to prioritize" is more formal and concise. -
"a university would encourage students to interact with their peers by establishing clubs" -> "a university could promote peer interaction through club establishment"
Explanation: "Would encourage students to interact with their peers by establishing clubs" is a bit wordy. "Could promote peer interaction through club establishment" is more concise and formal. -
"encourage students to interact with their peers by establishing clubs or to give them advice" -> "encourage students to interact with their peers through club participation and to offer guidance"
Explanation: "To give them advice" is somewhat informal. "To offer guidance" is a more formal alternative. -
"teenagers would by themselves create groups of discussion and learning" -> "adolescents would autonomously form discussion and study groups"
Explanation: "Teenagers would by themselves create groups of discussion and learning" is somewhat informal and awkward. "Adolescents would autonomously form discussion and study groups" is more formal and clear. -
"rendering the lack of interaction with lecturers insignificant" -> "making the absence of interaction with lecturers negligible"
Explanation: "Rendering the lack of interaction with lecturers insignificant" is somewhat awkward. "Making the absence of interaction with lecturers negligible" is more formal and concise. -
"The answers would lie in" -> "Solutions lie in"
Explanation: "The answers would lie in" is somewhat informal. "Solutions lie in" is a more direct and formal expression. -
"implementing orrientation programmes" -> "implementing orientation programs"
Explanation: "Orrientation" is misspelled. "Orientation programs" is the correct spelling and more formal. -
"clubs or groups for higher level of competition and motivation" -> "clubs or groups to foster higher levels of competition and motivation"
Explanation: "Higher level of competition and motivation" is somewhat informal. "To foster higher levels of competition and motivation" is more formal and precise.
Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7
Band Score for Task Response: 7
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Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay adequately addresses both parts of the prompt. It discusses why students find it harder to study at university compared to school, attributing it to the more specialized and challenging curriculum at the tertiary level, as well as the lack of interaction with teachers and peers. Additionally, it proposes solutions to mitigate these challenges.
- How to improve: While the essay covers both aspects of the question, enhancing the depth of analysis regarding the reasons for the difficulties students face and providing more concrete examples could further strengthen the response. Incorporating specific instances or studies that illustrate the differences in curriculum depth or the impact of limited interaction on student performance would enrich the discussion.
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Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position throughout, asserting that students find it harder to study in universities due to the deeper curriculum and lack of interaction, and proposes solutions to address these issues.
- How to improve: To enhance clarity, ensure that each paragraph consistently supports the main argument. Additionally, explicitly stating the thesis or main argument in the introduction and revisiting it in the conclusion can reinforce the essay’s coherence.
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Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents ideas adequately, discussing the reasons for the challenges students face in universities and proposing solutions. However, some ideas could be further developed and supported with additional evidence or examples.
- How to improve: To extend and support ideas effectively, provide specific examples, statistics, or studies that illustrate the points made. Additionally, elaborate on how the proposed solutions could effectively address the identified issues.
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Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay largely stays on topic, focusing on why students find it harder to study at university compared to school and suggesting solutions to mitigate these challenges. However, there are minor instances where the discussion could be more closely tied to the main topic.
- How to improve: Ensure that each paragraph directly relates to the central argument and refrain from introducing tangential ideas. Reviewing the essay to eliminate any irrelevant information or digressions can help maintain focus on the topic at hand.
Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7
Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7
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Organize Information Logically:
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Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a generally logical organization of information. It begins with an introduction that sets up the discussion on the challenges students face when transitioning from school to university. The body paragraphs effectively delve into the causes of these challenges and propose solutions. Finally, the conclusion summarizes the main points and offers a resolution. However, there are instances where the flow could be improved, such as the abrupt transition between discussing problems and proposing solutions in the body paragraphs.
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How to improve: To enhance logical organization, ensure smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs. Consider using transitional phrases or sentences to connect different sections of the essay more effectively. Additionally, maintaining a consistent focus on either discussing problems or providing solutions within each body paragraph can improve coherence.
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Use Paragraphs:
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Detailed explanation: The essay employs paragraphs to organize its content, with each paragraph addressing a specific aspect of the prompt. However, the effectiveness of paragraphing could be enhanced. Some paragraphs cover multiple ideas without clear delineation, leading to potential confusion for the reader. For example, the second paragraph discusses both the difficulties of specialized subjects and changes in the learning environment without a clear transition between them.
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How to improve: Aim for more focused and coherent paragraph structure by sticking to one main idea per paragraph. Start each paragraph with a topic sentence that introduces the central theme, followed by supporting details and examples. This will help improve clarity and readability.
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Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
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Detailed explanation: The essay incorporates cohesive devices to link ideas and maintain coherence. Examples include transitional phrases like "however," "furthermore," and "in conclusion," which help guide the reader through the argument. Additionally, pronouns and demonstratives are used effectively to refer back to previously mentioned concepts.
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How to improve: While cohesive devices are used, diversifying their range and frequency can further strengthen coherence. Introduce a variety of connectors, such as "moreover," "nevertheless," and "conversely," to provide a richer connective framework. Additionally, ensure consistent usage of cohesive devices throughout the essay to maintain coherence and cohesion.
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Overall, the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of coherence and cohesion, with clear organization and effective use of cohesive devices. By refining paragraph structure and enhancing the variety of cohesive devices, the essay can achieve an even higher level of coherence and cohesion.
Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6
Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6
- Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a fair range of vocabulary, including varied terms such as "transitioning," "curriculum," "generalized," "orientation," "inefficiency," and "competition." However, some vocabulary choices could be more precise or sophisticated to enhance lexical diversity and depth.
- How to improve: To improve the lexical resource, strive for a richer variety of vocabulary. Instead of using common terms like "difficulties" or "changes," explore synonyms or more nuanced expressions. For instance, replace "difficulties" with "challenges" or "obstacles," and consider using more advanced vocabulary to express ideas more precisely.
- Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay occasionally employs vocabulary precisely, such as "specialized subject" and "orientation programmes." However, there are instances where vocabulary usage could be more precise. For example, the phrase "more difficult and denser knowledge" could be refined to convey the specific nature of the knowledge being discussed.
- How to improve: Aim for greater precision in vocabulary selection. Instead of using vague terms like "more difficult," specify the nature of the challenge. For example, consider using phrases like "complex concepts" or "advanced theories" to provide a clearer picture of the academic difficulty students face.
- Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: Spelling accuracy in the essay is generally satisfactory, with no glaring errors noted. However, there are minor instances of misspelled words, such as "orrientation" (orientation).
- How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, consider utilizing spelling and grammar checkers, proofreading meticulously, and practicing spelling through writing exercises. Paying close attention to commonly misspelled words and frequently reviewing them can also be beneficial.
Overall, while the essay demonstrates a satisfactory level of lexical resource, there is room for improvement in expanding the range of vocabulary, using terminology more precisely, and ensuring consistent spelling accuracy. By incorporating a richer variety of vocabulary and refining word choice for greater precision, the essay could further elevate its lexical resource and overall effectiveness.
Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7
Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7
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Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of sentence structures. Complex sentences are used effectively to convey ideas, such as in the opening sentence: "There is little doubt that when transitioning from higher-secondary schools to universities, teenagers usually find it more difficult to absorb knowledge." Additionally, there is a mix of compound and complex sentences throughout the essay, enhancing its coherence and readability.
- How to improve: While the essay already employs a diverse range of sentence structures, further variety can be achieved by incorporating compound-complex sentences and varying the placement of dependent clauses within sentences. This can add richness and depth to the essay’s structure, enhancing its overall sophistication.
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Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: Overall, the essay demonstrates a good level of grammatical accuracy. However, there are instances of grammatical errors and punctuation inconsistencies throughout the text. For example, in the sentence: "These difficulties, in turn, may cause students to be confused and disheartened as they did not use to such a specialized level of knowledge in lower education, where the curriculum is more generalised," there is a subject-verb agreement issue ("did not use to" should be "were not used to"). Additionally, there are some punctuation errors, such as missing commas in compound sentences and inconsistent capitalization.
- How to improve: To enhance grammatical accuracy, it’s essential to review subject-verb agreement, verb tense consistency, and pronoun usage. Proofreading the essay carefully can help identify and correct punctuation errors, ensuring clarity and coherence in the text. Additionally, seeking feedback from peers or instructors can provide valuable insights for improvement.
Bài sửa mẫu
There is indeed a notable shift when students transition from secondary school to university, often finding it more challenging to grasp new knowledge. This can largely be attributed to the more rigorous and profound academic curriculum at the tertiary level compared to that in schools. However, there are effective strategies that can be implemented to address these challenges.
One significant factor contributing to the difficulty students face in university is the specialized nature of the subjects they choose to study. The complex and dense subject matter encountered at this level may be unfamiliar and overwhelming to students, who were accustomed to a more generalized curriculum in lower education. Additionally, the shift in the learning environment, particularly the decrease in communication and contact with lecturers and peers due to larger class sizes, can further exacerbate these challenges. This lack of interaction can lead to deteriorating academic performance and a sense of disconnection from the learning process.
Fortunately, there are solutions to mitigate these issues. Central to this is for universities to introduce a more comprehensive orientation program for incoming students. Such programs can provide students with effective learning strategies, such as time management and decision-making skills, which are crucial for navigating the demands of university education. By equipping students with these skills, universities can help them prioritize their studies and adapt to the academic rigors more effectively.
Moreover, both universities and students themselves can take steps to foster a more supportive learning environment. For example, universities could promote peer interaction through the establishment of clubs or groups where students can engage in discussions and collaborative learning activities. Encouraging students to participate in such extracurricular activities not only enhances their academic experience but also cultivates a sense of community and camaraderie among peers. Additionally, faculty office hours can be utilized to offer guidance and support to students outside of the classroom setting.
In conclusion, the challenges encountered by students in transitioning from school to university can be addressed through various means, including implementing orientation programs and fostering a supportive learning environment through clubs or groups. By taking proactive steps to support students in their academic journey, universities can help alleviate the difficulties associated with higher education and promote student success.
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