More and more plastic is polluting cities, countrywide and oceans in the world. What are the problems caused by plastic wastes? What measures should be taken to solve it

More and more plastic is polluting cities, countrywide and oceans in the world. What are the problems caused by plastic wastes? What measures should be taken to solve it

Metropolises, across the country and open water are being polluted by the increasing amount of plastic made by humans. This essay will address the problem arise from this phenomenon and propose some feasible solution to tackle it.
Plastic waste appearing in the oceans cause extreme health issues to marine life. As many creatures can mistake litter for food, consuming such toxic material leading to ingestion and death in some cases due to internal injuries. When plastic invasion occurs to the ocean, it is more likely for fish or seals to get trapped in fishing nets or bottles that suffocates them and disrupt their abilities to move around. Furthermore, microplastic particles break down if plastic is constantly being exposed to uv rays. Small pieces of those either floating in the air or travel down the water bodies and absorb into soil, thereby directly contaminating nature elements.
As far as long term solutions are considered, authorities should make some efforts to establish proper waste management systems to eliminate the amount of waste entering the environment while being strictly regulating the law. Developing recycling chains and technology are crucial to navigate waste problem and repurpose non-biodegradable trash into making products packaging and construction items. This decreases the need for new plastic production and reduce waste in landfills, making it a sustainable change to lessen the pressure on environmental preservation. Penalties and law enforcement should be implement to ensure that businesses are responsible for their waste and no pile of trash would be dump into the ocean illegally.

In conclusion, the drawbacks of plastic waste such as posing threat to the marine life and contaminating the nature have negatively impacted on the environment. Therefore, sustainable change in waste management and law-enforcement should be done in order to effectively tackle such issues.


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

  1. "Metropolises, across the country and open water" -> "Metropolises, both on land and in open waters"
    Explanation: The phrase "across the country and open water" is somewhat vague and informal. "Both on land and in open waters" clarifies the geographical context and enhances the formality of the statement.

  2. "the increasing amount of plastic made by humans" -> "the escalating volume of plastic produced by humans"
    Explanation: "The increasing amount of plastic made by humans" is somewhat informal and imprecise. "The escalating volume of plastic produced by humans" uses more precise language and aligns better with academic style.

  3. "This essay will address the problem arise from this phenomenon" -> "This essay will examine the problems arising from this phenomenon"
    Explanation: "The problem arise from" is grammatically incorrect. "The problems arising from" corrects the grammatical error and pluralizes "problem" to reflect the multiple issues discussed in the essay.

  4. "some feasible solution" -> "some feasible solutions"
    Explanation: "Some feasible solution" is grammatically incorrect. "Some feasible solutions" corrects the grammatical error and pluralizes the noun to match the plural context of the essay.

  5. "Plastic waste appearing in the oceans cause" -> "The appearance of plastic waste in the oceans causes"
    Explanation: "Plastic waste appearing in the oceans cause" is awkward and grammatically incorrect. "The appearance of plastic waste in the oceans causes" corrects the grammatical structure and improves readability.

  6. "As many creatures can mistake litter for food, consuming such toxic material leading to ingestion and death in some cases due to internal injuries" -> "Many creatures mistake litter for food, consuming such toxic material, which can lead to ingestion and death in some cases due to internal injuries"
    Explanation: The original sentence is overly long and convoluted. The revised version simplifies and clarifies the sentence structure, improving readability and flow.

  7. "When plastic invasion occurs to the ocean" -> "When plastic invades the ocean"
    Explanation: "Plastic invasion occurs to the ocean" is awkward and incorrect. "When plastic invades the ocean" corrects the grammatical structure and simplifies the phrase.

  8. "it is more likely for fish or seals to get trapped in fishing nets or bottles that suffocates them" -> "it is more likely for fish or seals to become trapped in fishing nets or bottles, which can suffocate them"
    Explanation: The original sentence is grammatically incorrect and awkward. The revision corrects the grammatical structure and clarifies the meaning.

  9. "microplastic particles break down if plastic is constantly being exposed to uv rays" -> "microplastic particles break down when plastic is constantly exposed to UV rays"
    Explanation: "If" is incorrect in this context; "when" is the correct temporal conjunction. Also, "uv rays" should be "UV rays" for proper capitalization in scientific contexts.

  10. "Small pieces of those either floating in the air or travel down the water bodies and absorb into soil" -> "Small pieces of these particles either float in the air or travel through water bodies and are absorbed into the soil"
    Explanation: The original sentence is unclear and grammatically incorrect. The revision clarifies the meaning and corrects the grammatical structure.

  11. "As far as long term solutions are considered" -> "Regarding long-term solutions"
    Explanation: "As far as long term solutions are considered" is verbose and awkward. "Regarding long-term solutions" is more concise and formal.

  12. "Developing recycling chains and technology are crucial" -> "Developing recycling chains and technologies are crucial"
    Explanation: "Developing recycling chains and technology" is grammatically incorrect. "Developing recycling chains and technologies" corrects the grammatical error and pluralizes "technology" to match the context.

  13. "navigate waste problem" -> "address the waste problem"
    Explanation: "Navigate waste problem" is an incorrect idiom. "Address the waste problem" is the correct idiomatic expression.

  14. "Penalties and law enforcement should be implement" -> "Penalties and law enforcement should be implemented"
    Explanation: "Implement" is a verb that requires the past participle "implemented" in this context to be grammatically correct.

  15. "no pile of trash would be dump into the ocean illegally" -> "no piles of trash should not be dumped into the ocean illegally"
    Explanation: "Would be dump" is grammatically incorrect. "Should not be dumped" corrects the verb tense and form, and "piles" is plural to match the context.

These changes enhance the academic tone, improve grammatical accuracy, and clarify the meaning of the essay.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Task Response: 7

  • Answer All Parts of the Question:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both parts of the prompt by discussing the problems caused by plastic waste, particularly its impact on marine life and the environment, and proposing solutions such as improved waste management and stricter regulations. However, while the problems are identified, the discussion could benefit from a broader range of issues, such as the economic impact of plastic pollution or the effects on human health.
    • How to improve: To enhance the response, the writer should consider incorporating additional problems associated with plastic waste, such as its contribution to climate change or its economic implications for industries reliant on clean environments. This would provide a more comprehensive view of the issue.
  • Present a Clear Position Throughout:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position that plastic waste is a significant problem and that action is necessary. However, the phrasing in some areas, such as "this essay will address the problem arise from this phenomenon," could be clearer. The conclusion reiterates the main points, but the overall flow could be improved for better coherence.
    • How to improve: To strengthen the clarity of the position, the writer should ensure that the introduction explicitly states the stance and that each paragraph consistently reinforces this viewpoint. Using transitional phrases can help guide the reader through the argument more smoothly.
  • Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents relevant ideas about the impact of plastic waste and potential solutions. However, some points lack depth. For instance, while the mention of microplastics is important, it could be elaborated with specific examples or statistics to enhance the argument’s credibility. The solutions proposed are relevant but could also benefit from more detailed explanations of how they would be implemented.
    • How to improve: To improve the development of ideas, the writer should aim to provide more detailed examples and evidence to support claims. This could include citing studies on marine life affected by plastic or successful case studies of waste management systems in other countries.
  • Stay on Topic:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the issues of plastic waste and potential solutions. However, there are moments where the focus could be sharpened, particularly in the discussion of solutions, which could be more directly tied back to the problems outlined earlier.
    • How to improve: To maintain focus, the writer should ensure that each paragraph directly relates back to the main question. A clear outline before writing can help keep the discussion aligned with the prompt, ensuring that each point made is relevant to the issues of plastic waste and its solutions.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a coherent argument. With some adjustments to depth, clarity, and focus, the response could achieve a higher band score.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 8

  • Organize Information Logically:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure, starting with an introduction that outlines the topic and the main points to be discussed. The body paragraphs are logically organized, with the first focusing on the problems caused by plastic waste and the second addressing potential solutions. For instance, the transition from discussing the health issues faced by marine life to the broader implications of plastic pollution is smooth and coherent. However, the introduction could be slightly more precise in stating the problems and solutions, as it currently lacks specificity.
    • How to improve: To enhance logical flow, the introduction could explicitly mention the specific problems and solutions that will be discussed. Additionally, using clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph would help guide the reader through the essay’s arguments more effectively.
  • Use Paragraphs:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct aspect of the topic. The first paragraph discusses the problems related to plastic waste, while the second outlines possible solutions. However, the second paragraph could benefit from clearer separation of ideas, as it currently combines multiple solutions into one lengthy paragraph, which may overwhelm the reader.
    • How to improve: Consider breaking the second paragraph into two separate paragraphs: one focusing on waste management systems and the other on law enforcement and penalties. This would allow for a more in-depth discussion of each solution and improve readability.
  • Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good use of cohesive devices, such as "furthermore," "as far as," and "therefore," which help to connect ideas and maintain the flow of the argument. However, there are moments where the use of cohesive devices could be more varied. For example, the phrase "as far as long term solutions are considered" is somewhat repetitive and could be replaced with alternatives to enhance variety.
    • How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, consider incorporating a wider range of linking words and phrases, such as "in addition," "moreover," or "consequently." Additionally, using pronouns and synonyms to refer back to previously mentioned ideas can help maintain coherence without sounding repetitive.

Overall, the essay is well-structured and coherent, demonstrating a strong command of coherence and cohesion principles. By refining the introduction, improving paragraph structure, and diversifying cohesive devices, the essay could achieve an even higher level of clarity and effectiveness.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

  • Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary related to the topic of plastic pollution. Words like "metropolises," "marine life," "microplastic," and "non-biodegradable" show an attempt to use specialized terms. However, there are instances of repetition and limited variation in word choice, such as the repeated use of "waste" and "plastic." This indicates a lack of broader vocabulary that could enhance the essay’s sophistication.
    • How to improve: To improve lexical variety, the writer could replace repetitive terms with synonyms or related phrases. For example, instead of repeatedly using "waste," alternatives like "refuse," "debris," or "litter" could be employed. Additionally, incorporating more descriptive adjectives or adverbs could enrich the text, such as using "hazardous" instead of just "toxic" when referring to materials.
  • Use Vocabulary Precisely:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains some imprecise vocabulary usage. For instance, the phrase "the problem arise from this phenomenon" should be "the problems arising from this phenomenon." Additionally, "plastic invasion occurs to the ocean" is awkwardly phrased; a more precise expression would be "when plastic invades the ocean." Such inaccuracies can confuse the reader and detract from the overall clarity of the argument.
    • How to improve: To enhance precision, the writer should focus on grammatical accuracy and idiomatic expressions. Reviewing subject-verb agreement and ensuring that phrases are commonly used in English will help. For example, practicing the use of gerunds (e.g., "arising" instead of "arise") and familiarizing oneself with collocations (e.g., "plastic pollution" instead of "plastic invasion") would improve clarity and precision.
  • Use Correct Spelling:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally maintains acceptable spelling; however, there are notable errors that could affect readability. For example, "solution" is incorrectly used as "solution" in the phrase "propose some feasible solution." Additionally, "implement" should be "implemented," and "dump" should be "dumped" to maintain correct verb forms.
    • How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, the writer should proofread the essay carefully, ideally reading it aloud to catch mistakes. Utilizing spell-check tools and practicing spelling through writing exercises can also be beneficial. Furthermore, keeping a list of commonly misspelled words and reviewing them regularly can help improve overall spelling proficiency.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and attempts to use a range of vocabulary, improvements in lexical variety, precision, and spelling accuracy are necessary to achieve a higher band score in the Lexical Resource criterion.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

  • Use a Wide Range of Structures:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of sentence structures, including complex sentences and some compound sentences. For instance, phrases like "As many creatures can mistake litter for food, consuming such toxic material leading to ingestion and death in some cases due to internal injuries" show an attempt to combine ideas effectively. However, there are instances of awkward phrasing and incomplete structures, such as "the problem arise from this phenomenon," which should be "the problems arising from this phenomenon." Additionally, the use of passive voice is limited, which could enhance the variety of structures.
    • How to improve: To diversify sentence structures further, the writer could incorporate more complex sentences with subordinate clauses and conditional sentences. For example, using conditional phrases like "If we do not address plastic waste, we may face severe consequences" can add depth. Practicing the use of passive voice and varying sentence beginnings can also enhance the overall complexity and interest of the writing.
  • Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that detract from clarity. For instance, "the problem arise from this phenomenon" should be corrected to "the problems arising from this phenomenon." Additionally, "Plastic waste appearing in the oceans cause extreme health issues to marine life" should be "Plastic waste appearing in the oceans causes extreme health issues for marine life." There are also punctuation issues, such as missing commas that could improve readability, e.g., "Metropolises, across the country and open water are being polluted" should have a comma after "country."
    • How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles. Regular practice with grammar exercises focused on these areas can be beneficial. For punctuation, reviewing rules regarding comma usage, especially in complex sentences, will enhance clarity. Reading aloud can also help identify awkward phrasing and punctuation errors, allowing for corrections before finalizing the essay.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a good command of grammatical range and accuracy, addressing the identified weaknesses will help elevate the writing to a higher band score.

Bài sửa mẫu

Metropolises, both on land and in open waters, are being polluted by the escalating volume of plastic produced by humans. This essay will examine the problems arising from this phenomenon and propose some feasible solutions to tackle it.

Plastic waste appearing in the oceans causes extreme health issues for marine life. Many creatures mistake litter for food, consuming such toxic material, which can lead to ingestion and death in some cases due to internal injuries. When plastic invades the ocean, it is more likely for fish or seals to become trapped in fishing nets or bottles, which can suffocate them and disrupt their ability to move. Furthermore, microplastic particles break down when plastic is constantly exposed to UV rays. Small pieces of these particles either float in the air or travel through water bodies and are absorbed into the soil, thereby directly contaminating natural elements.

Regarding long-term solutions, authorities should make efforts to establish proper waste management systems to eliminate the amount of waste entering the environment while strictly regulating the law. Developing recycling chains and technologies is crucial to address the waste problem and repurpose non-biodegradable trash into products, packaging, and construction items. This decreases the need for new plastic production and reduces waste in landfills, making it a sustainable change to lessen the pressure on environmental preservation. Penalties and law enforcement should be implemented to ensure that businesses are responsible for their waste and that no piles of trash are dumped into the ocean illegally.

In conclusion, the drawbacks of plastic waste, such as posing a threat to marine life and contaminating nature, have negatively impacted the environment. Therefore, sustainable changes in waste management and law enforcement should be enacted in order to effectively tackle these issues.

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