Nowadays governments are investing more in public transport such as buses and trains rather than in building new roads. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development?
Nowadays governments are investing more in public transport such as buses and trains rather than in building new roads. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development?
It is increasingly noticed that the investment of the government goes to the development of public transportation rather than the construction of more roads. The reasons behind this and the argument whether this consists of benefits or drawbacks will be discussed in the essay below.
The reasons for the spending of the authorities on public transport could be attributed to two factors. The first one is that the human population is constantly rising, a considerable proportion of which is city-dwellers. In regard to this situation, the need for accommodations arises, which may eventually leave no space to build more roads due to the buildings mushrooming all over the area. Moreover, public transportation is considered to be more environmentally-friendly and can contain more people than those of private usage, hence assisting in improving the environment and, primarily, building a safer and healthier society.
Due to those points, the development would be advantageous to the society as a whole. As the government spends a significant amount of money on public transportation, the volume of traffic may dwindle when commuters opt for those means of transportation, resulting in less exhaust fumes being released into the air. More specifically, public health will be improved simultaneously with the cleanse of the atmosphere. Likewise, the improvement of public transport will make way for the prevention of traffic congestion. This will therefore save a lot of people’s time doing their activities while safeguarding them from wasting their money on refuelling, and in certain circumstances protect them from serious injuries which would cost a fortune.
In conclusion, the government’s choice to invest in public transport is a positive outcome that seems to stem from two main reasons, the growing population and the practicality of this means of moving. Nevertheless, the authorities should attempt to balance those ways of development in order to create sufficient space for all the people to travel between places.
Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng
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"It is increasingly noticed that" -> "It has been increasingly observed that"
Explanation: The phrase "It has been increasingly observed that" is more formal and precise, fitting the academic tone of the essay better than "It is increasingly noticed that". -
"the investment of the government" -> "governmental investment"
Explanation: "Governmental investment" is a more concise and formal way to express "the investment of the government", streamlining the sentence structure. -
"goes to" -> "is directed towards"
Explanation: "Is directed towards" is a more formal expression than "goes to", enhancing the academic quality of the sentence. -
"the construction of more roads" -> "the expansion of road infrastructure"
Explanation: "The expansion of road infrastructure" is a more precise and formal term than "the construction of more roads", which improves the sentence’s clarity and formality. -
"the spending of the authorities" -> "the expenditures by the authorities"
Explanation: "The expenditures by the authorities" is a more formal and accurate way to describe government spending, aligning better with academic style. -
"a considerable proportion of which" -> "a significant portion of whom"
Explanation: Since the reference is to people (city-dwellers), "whom" is more appropriate than "which". Also, "significant portion" is slightly more formal than "considerable proportion". -
"buildings mushrooming" -> "rapid urban development"
Explanation: "Rapid urban development" is a more formal and precise term than the idiomatic "buildings mushrooming", fitting the academic context better. -
"can contain more people than those of private usage" -> "can accommodate more passengers than private vehicles"
Explanation: "Can accommodate more passengers than private vehicles" is more specific and formal, improving the sentence’s clarity and academic tone. -
"the volume of traffic may dwindle" -> "traffic volume may decrease"
Explanation: "Traffic volume may decrease" is a more direct and formal expression than "the volume of traffic may dwindle", enhancing the sentence’s formality. -
"resulting in less exhaust fumes being released" -> "resulting in fewer exhaust emissions"
Explanation: "Fewer exhaust emissions" is a more precise and formal term than "less exhaust fumes being released", aligning better with scientific and academic language. -
"cleanse of the atmosphere" -> "purification of the atmosphere"
Explanation: "Purification of the atmosphere" is a more formal and precise term than "cleanse of the atmosphere", fitting the academic context more appropriately. -
"make way for the prevention of traffic congestion" -> "facilitate the reduction of traffic congestion"
Explanation: "Facilitate the reduction of traffic congestion" is a more formal and precise way to express the idea of preventing traffic jams, enhancing the academic tone. -
"save a lot of people’s time doing their activities" -> "significantly save time for individuals engaged in their daily activities"
Explanation: "Significantly save time for individuals engaged in their daily activities" is more formal and clear, avoiding the possessive form "people’s time" which is less formal. -
"safeguarding them from wasting their money on refuelling" -> "protecting them from unnecessary expenditures on fuel"
Explanation: "Protecting them from unnecessary expenditures on fuel" is a more formal and precise way to express the idea of saving money on refueling, improving the sentence’s academic quality. -
"serious injuries which would cost a fortune" -> "severe injuries that could entail substantial financial costs"
Explanation: "Severe injuries that could entail substantial financial costs" is more formal and precise, avoiding colloquial expressions like "cost a fortune", thus better suiting the academic tone.
Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8
Band Score for Task Response: 8
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Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay adequately addresses all parts of the question. It discusses the reasons for governments investing in public transport over building new roads and evaluates whether this trend is positive or negative.
- The essay highlights two primary reasons for the government’s focus on public transportation: the increasing urban population leading to limited space for road construction and the environmental benefits of public transport.
- It concludes by stating that while this investment is positive, there should be a balance between investing in public transport and road construction.
- How to improve: To further enhance the response, consider providing more specific examples or data to support the points made. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph directly relates to the prompt and contributes to the overall argument.
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Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position throughout, arguing that investing in public transport is a positive development.
- The introduction sets the stage by stating that the essay will discuss the reasons behind government investment in public transport and whether it’s beneficial or not.
- Each subsequent paragraph supports the idea that investing in public transport is positive, citing reasons such as environmental benefits and reduced traffic congestion.
- How to improve: While the position is clear, ensure that the stance is explicitly stated in the introduction and reiterated in the conclusion for added clarity and emphasis.
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Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively presents, extends, and supports ideas related to the topic.
- Ideas are introduced logically, with each paragraph building upon the previous one.
- Examples and reasoning are provided to support the argument, such as the impact of public transport on reducing traffic congestion and improving air quality.
- How to improve: To further extend and support ideas, consider incorporating counterarguments or addressing potential drawbacks of investing solely in public transport to provide a more comprehensive analysis.
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Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay largely stays on topic, discussing the reasons for government investment in public transport and evaluating whether it’s positive or negative.
- However, there are some instances where the essay slightly deviates, such as briefly mentioning the need for a balance between investing in public transport and road construction.
- How to improve: To ensure strict adherence to the topic, avoid introducing tangential points unless they directly contribute to the main argument. Focus on providing a thorough analysis of the reasons behind government investment in public transport and its implications.
Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7
Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7
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Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a logical organization by introducing the topic, discussing reasons for the government’s investment in public transport, and then presenting arguments for its positive impact. Each paragraph follows a clear sequence of ideas, leading to a well-supported conclusion.
- How to improve: To further enhance logical organization, consider using more transitional phrases between sentences and paragraphs to improve the flow of ideas. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea to avoid confusion.
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Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay uses paragraphs effectively to separate different aspects of the discussion. Each paragraph addresses a specific point related to the topic, contributing to the overall coherence of the essay.
- How to improve: To improve paragraphing, ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that introduces the main idea of the paragraph. Additionally, strive for a balance in the length of paragraphs to maintain reader engagement.
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Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay uses a variety of cohesive devices, such as pronouns ("this," "those," "that") and conjunctions ("moreover," "likewise," "nevertheless"), to link ideas and create coherence. These devices help to connect sentences and paragraphs smoothly.
- How to improve: To further diversify cohesive devices, consider incorporating more advanced linking words and phrases, such as "furthermore," "on the other hand," or "in addition," to provide a richer range of connections between ideas. Additionally, pay attention to the placement of these devices to ensure they enhance the overall flow of the essay.
Overall, the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of coherence and cohesion, earning a band score of 7. To improve further, focus on refining the logical organization, enhancing paragraph structure, and diversifying cohesive devices.
Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6
Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6
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Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable attempt to utilize a varied vocabulary. For instance, phrases like "considerable proportion," "mushrooming all over the area," and "opt for those means of transportation" showcase a range of vocabulary choices. However, there are areas where more sophisticated vocabulary could enhance the expression of ideas further.
- How to improve: To elevate the lexical resource, aim for greater diversity in vocabulary, incorporating advanced synonyms and idiomatic expressions where appropriate. For instance, instead of repeating phrases like "public transportation," consider alternatives such as "mass transit" or "communal mobility options." Additionally, introduce domain-specific terminology related to urban planning or environmental science to enrich the discourse.
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Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally employs vocabulary with reasonable precision. However, there are instances where word choice could be refined for greater accuracy and clarity. For example, the phrase "due to those points" is somewhat vague and could be replaced with a more specific transition or rephrased to directly connect to preceding arguments.
- How to improve: Focus on selecting words or phrases that precisely convey intended meanings. Avoid ambiguous language and strive for clarity in expression. Utilize vocabulary that succinctly captures the essence of ideas without relying on filler phrases. Additionally, consider the connotations and nuances of words to ensure alignment with intended interpretations.
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Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: Spelling accuracy in the essay is generally satisfactory, with no glaring errors evident. However, there are a few instances where minor spelling mistakes occur, such as "commuters" spelled as "commutors." While these errors do not significantly detract from comprehension, consistent attention to spelling precision is advisable.
- How to improve: Enhance spelling accuracy through regular proofreading and the use of spelling check tools. Develop a habit of double-checking spelling during the writing process to catch and correct any inadvertent errors. Consider creating a personal list of commonly misspelled words to reinforce correct spellings through targeted practice. Additionally, engaging in extensive reading can help internalize correct spelling patterns and improve overall written language proficiency.
Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 8
Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 8
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Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of sentence structures, including simple, compound, and complex sentences. For instance, complex sentences like "The reasons for the spending of the authorities on public transport could be attributed to two factors" showcase the ability to construct sophisticated sentence structures effectively. However, there is room for improvement in incorporating more complex sentence structures, such as using subordinate clauses or participial phrases, to further enrich the essay’s expression and fluency.
- How to improve: To enhance the variety of sentence structures, consider integrating more complex sentence patterns. For instance, instead of relying solely on coordinating conjunctions, incorporate subordinating conjunctions to create complex sentences. Additionally, experiment with participial phrases and appositives to add depth and sophistication to your writing.
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Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally maintains grammatical accuracy, with few errors detracting from overall comprehension. Examples of accurate grammar usage include proper subject-verb agreement and consistent tense usage throughout the essay. However, there are instances where minor errors in article usage (e.g., "a considerable proportion of which is city-dwellers") and punctuation (e.g., missing commas after introductory phrases) are noticeable. These errors do not significantly impede understanding but suggest a need for more consistent attention to detail.
- How to improve: To enhance grammatical accuracy, pay close attention to article usage and ensure consistency in punctuation, particularly after introductory phrases and in complex sentence structures. Reviewing grammar rules related to articles, comma usage, and sentence structure can help reinforce accuracy. Additionally, proofreading your essay carefully before submission can help catch and correct these minor errors.
Overall, while the essay demonstrates strong grammatical range and accuracy, there are opportunities for refinement in both sentence structure variety and meticulous grammar and punctuation usage. Incorporating a wider array of complex sentence structures and maintaining consistent attention to grammatical details will further elevate the quality of your writing.
Bài sửa mẫu
It has been increasingly observed that governmental investment tends towards the expansion of public transportation rather than the construction of new roads. The reasons behind this shift and the implications, whether positive or negative, will be discussed below.
The decision to allocate funds to public transport instead of road construction can be attributed to two primary factors. Firstly, with the continuous rise in the human population, especially in urban areas, space becomes a premium. This rapid urban development often leaves little room for the construction of new roads amidst the growing number of buildings. Additionally, public transportation is favored for its capacity to accommodate more passengers than private vehicles, thereby easing congestion and contributing to a cleaner environment.
This shift towards public transport holds several benefits for society. By investing in public transportation, governments can potentially decrease traffic volume as commuters opt for these more efficient means of travel. This reduction in traffic can lead to fewer exhaust emissions, thereby purifying the atmosphere and promoting public health. Moreover, improved public transport infrastructure can alleviate traffic congestion, saving individuals valuable time in their daily activities and reducing their expenditures on fuel. Furthermore, it can mitigate the risk of severe injuries resulting from accidents, thus preventing substantial financial costs for both individuals and society as a whole.
In conclusion, the government’s decision to prioritize investment in public transport over road construction is a positive development driven by the need to accommodate urban growth and the practical advantages of public transportation. However, it is essential for authorities to strike a balance between these two forms of development to ensure adequate transportation options for all citizens.
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