Reason why many people agrue that in ohter to improve education quality, high school students are encouraged to make comments or even critism on the teacher other, however, think it will lead to loss of respect and discipline in the classroom dicuss both views and give your own opinion.

Reason why many people agrue that in ohter to improve education quality, high school students are encouraged to make comments or even critism on the teacher other, however, think it will lead to loss of respect and discipline in the classroom dicuss both views and give your own opinion.

How to improve education quality in high school be a diffcult issue worldwide. This essay agree that it is more beneficial for student to make comments or even on the teacher due to teacher will have apporopriate teaching method and prevent teacher form becoming too complacent rather than teacher should restrict that comments

It can be seen that allow student make comments on the teacher will help teacher know student's learning needs. This is because, teacher can easily find the best teaching method if they recieve student comments.As a result, student agree their teacher teaching method was consistency when student make comments to teacher because of teacher can realize the point which make their students didn't understand.

However, some people think it will lead to loss of respect and discipline th the classroom. This belief is based teacher can not control a growing number of comments from their student.For this reason, teacher should restrict that comments, whether students like it or not. This point may be true, but feedback from student not only help teacher becoming perfectly but also make a connet line from students to teacher

This writer believes that feedback from student would prevent teacher becoming too complacent, This due to the fact that teacher will not improve their teaching method despite their education quality was poor. Because of this, teacher should allow students to make a comments to improve education quality.

Thus, help help teacher know student's learning need and prevent teacher becoming too complacent are essential points that need to be considered. Hence, it should have been shown that teacher must be sensitive when students make comment or even critism that quailty of education will be improve


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  1. "How to improve education quality in high school be a diffcult issue worldwide." -> "Improving education quality in high schools is a difficult issue worldwide."
    Explanation: This revision corrects the grammatical error and enhances the formality by using the passive voice and a more precise term ("high schools" instead of "high school").

  2. "This essay agree that it is more beneficial for student to make comments or even on the teacher" -> "This essay argues that it is more beneficial for students to comment on their teachers"
    Explanation: Corrects the grammatical error ("agree" to "argues") and uses the plural form "students" to match the context. Also, "comment on their teachers" is more precise and formal than "make comments or even on the teacher."

  3. "teacher will have apporopriate teaching method" -> "teachers will employ appropriate teaching methods"
    Explanation: Corrects the spelling error ("apporopriate" to "appropriate") and uses the plural form "methods" to match the context. Also, "employ" is more precise than "have" in this context.

  4. "prevent teacher form becoming too complacent" -> "prevent teachers from becoming too complacent"
    Explanation: Corrects the grammatical error ("form" to "from") and uses the plural form "teachers" to maintain consistency.

  5. "teacher should restrict that comments" -> "teachers should restrict such comments"
    Explanation: Corrects the grammatical structure and adds "such" to clarify the type of comments being referred to.

  6. "allow student make comments on the teacher" -> "allow students to comment on their teachers"
    Explanation: Corrects the grammatical error ("make" to "comment") and uses the plural form "students" and "their teachers" for consistency and formality.

  7. "student agree their teacher teaching method was consistency" -> "students agree that their teachers’ teaching methods are consistent"
    Explanation: Corrects the grammatical errors ("make" to "agree," "was" to "are," and "consistency" to "consistent") and uses the plural form "methods" and "teachers" for consistency.

  8. "loss of respect and discipline th the classroom" -> "loss of respect and discipline in the classroom"
    Explanation: Corrects the typographical error ("th" to "in") for proper punctuation.

  9. "teacher can not control a growing number of comments from their student" -> "teachers cannot control the increasing number of comments from their students"
    Explanation: Corrects the grammatical error ("can not" to "cannot") and uses the plural form "students" and "teachers" for consistency and formality.

  10. "feedback from student not only help teacher becoming perfectly" -> "feedback from students not only helps teachers become perfect"
    Explanation: Corrects the grammatical errors ("student" to "students," "help" to "helps," and "becoming" to "become") and uses the plural form "teachers" for consistency.

  11. "make a connet line from students to teacher" -> "establish a connection between students and teachers"
    Explanation: Corrects the spelling error ("connet" to "connection") and uses a more formal and precise phrase.

  12. "help help teacher know student’s learning need" -> "help teachers understand students’ learning needs"
    Explanation: Corrects the grammatical error ("help help" to "help") and uses the plural form "teachers" and "needs" for consistency and formality.

  13. "teacher should allow students to make a comments" -> "teachers should allow students to comment"
    Explanation: Corrects the grammatical error ("make a comments" to "comment") and uses the plural form "teachers" for consistency.

  14. "quailty of education will be improve" -> "quality of education will improve"
    Explanation: Corrects the spelling error ("quailty" to "quality") and adjusts the verb tense for grammatical correctness.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Task Response: 6

  • Answer All Parts of the Question:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay addresses both views regarding whether students should be encouraged to comment on their teachers. The first part discusses the benefits of student feedback, emphasizing how it can help teachers improve their methods. However, the counterargument regarding the potential loss of respect and discipline is less developed. The essay mentions this perspective but does not thoroughly explore it or provide specific examples or evidence to support it.
    • How to improve: To enhance the response, the writer should ensure that both views are equally explored. This could involve providing more detailed examples of how a lack of discipline might manifest in the classroom and discussing the implications of that loss of respect. Additionally, the writer should explicitly state their own opinion in a more structured manner, perhaps in a separate concluding paragraph.
  • Present a Clear Position Throughout:

    • Detailed explanation: The writer’s position is somewhat clear in favor of student feedback, but it lacks consistency. The essay begins with an agreement that feedback is beneficial but then introduces the opposing view without clearly delineating how the writer reconciles these two perspectives. The conclusion reiterates the importance of feedback but does not strongly affirm the writer’s stance.
    • How to improve: To maintain a clear position, the writer should explicitly state their opinion in the introduction and summarize it effectively in the conclusion. They could use phrases like “In my opinion” or “I strongly believe” to reinforce their stance throughout the essay. Additionally, addressing counterarguments more thoroughly could strengthen the overall argument.
  • Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents some ideas regarding the benefits of student feedback, such as improving teaching methods and addressing students’ learning needs. However, these ideas are not well-developed or supported with concrete examples. The argument lacks depth, as it does not explore how feedback can be implemented or what specific changes might occur as a result.
    • How to improve: The writer should aim to elaborate on their points with specific examples or scenarios that illustrate their arguments. For instance, they could describe a situation where student feedback led to a significant improvement in teaching methods. Additionally, incorporating statistics or studies related to student feedback could provide stronger support for their claims.
  • Stay on Topic:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, addressing the prompt about the role of student feedback in education. However, there are moments where the focus wavers, particularly in the discussion of the opposing view. The mention of teachers becoming complacent is relevant but could be more tightly connected to the argument about respect and discipline.
    • How to improve: To maintain focus, the writer should ensure that every paragraph directly relates to the main argument. They could create a clear outline before writing to ensure that each section of the essay addresses a specific aspect of the prompt. Additionally, avoiding vague statements and ensuring that each point is directly tied back to the main argument will help keep the essay on track.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a basic understanding of the topic and presents a relevant argument but requires more depth, clarity, and structure to achieve a higher band score.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 5

  • Organize Information Logically:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a general structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion; however, the organization of ideas is often unclear and lacks a logical progression. For instance, the introduction states the writer’s agreement with student feedback but does not clearly outline the main points that will be discussed. Additionally, the transition between ideas within paragraphs is abrupt, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument. For example, the shift from discussing the benefits of student feedback to the potential loss of respect is not well-defined.
    • How to improve: To enhance logical organization, the writer should clearly outline the main points in the introduction and ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea that supports the thesis. Using topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph can help clarify the main point being discussed. Furthermore, employing transitional phrases such as "On the other hand," or "In addition," can help guide the reader through the argument more smoothly.
  • Use Paragraphs:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay does use paragraphs, but their structure is inconsistent. Some paragraphs are overly long and attempt to cover multiple ideas without clear separation. For example, the second paragraph mixes the benefits of feedback with the potential issues of respect without delineating these ideas into distinct sections. This can confuse the reader and dilute the strength of the arguments presented.
    • How to improve: Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea, supported by relevant examples or explanations. The writer could benefit from breaking down complex ideas into separate paragraphs. For instance, one paragraph could focus solely on the benefits of student feedback, while another could address the concerns about respect and discipline. This separation will create a clearer structure and improve readability.
  • Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates limited use of cohesive devices, which affects the overall flow of ideas. For example, phrases like "This is because" and "For this reason" are used, but they are not varied enough to maintain reader engagement. Additionally, there are instances where the lack of cohesive devices leads to abrupt shifts in ideas, such as the transition from discussing student feedback to the potential drawbacks without a clear connection.
    • How to improve: To improve the use of cohesive devices, the writer should incorporate a wider range of linking words and phrases. For instance, using "Furthermore," "Moreover," or "Conversely," can help to connect ideas more effectively. Additionally, referring back to previously mentioned points can enhance cohesion. For example, when discussing the benefits of feedback, the writer could refer back to the introduction to reinforce the main argument.

In summary, while the essay presents relevant ideas, it requires significant improvements in organization, paragraph structure, and the use of cohesive devices to achieve a higher band score in Coherence and Cohesion. Focusing on these areas will lead to a clearer, more logical presentation of arguments, ultimately enhancing the overall quality of the essay.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

  • Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a moderate range of vocabulary, with some attempts to use varied expressions such as "appropriate teaching method," "feedback from student," and "growing number of comments." However, there are instances of repetition and limited synonyms, such as the repeated use of "teacher" and "student," which detracts from the overall lexical variety. For example, phrases like "help teacher know student’s learning needs" could be enhanced with synonyms or alternative expressions to avoid redundancy.
    • How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, the writer should incorporate synonyms and varied expressions. For instance, instead of repeatedly using "teacher," alternatives such as "instructor," "educator," or "facilitator" could be employed. Additionally, using phrases like "student feedback" or "learner input" instead of "student comments" could diversify the language used.
  • Use Vocabulary Precisely:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains several instances of imprecise vocabulary usage that affect clarity. For example, the phrase "prevent teacher form becoming too complacent" contains a spelling error ("form" should be "from") and lacks clarity in conveying the intended meaning. Additionally, the phrase "this writer believes" is somewhat informal for an academic essay and could be replaced with "this essay argues" for greater precision.
    • How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should focus on using vocabulary that accurately conveys the intended meaning. For instance, instead of "help teacher know," a more precise phrase would be "assist educators in understanding." Furthermore, proofreading for spelling and grammatical errors will enhance clarity and precision.
  • Use Correct Spelling:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains multiple spelling errors that hinder readability and professionalism. Examples include "diffcult" (should be "difficult"), "recieve" (should be "receive"), "connet" (should be "connect"), and "quailty" (should be "quality"). These errors suggest a need for greater attention to detail in spelling.
    • How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, the writer should engage in regular practice, such as using spelling apps or tools, and proofreading their work carefully before submission. Additionally, maintaining a list of commonly misspelled words and reviewing them can help improve overall spelling proficiency.

In summary, while the essay shows some strengths in vocabulary use, there are significant areas for improvement, particularly in expanding vocabulary range, enhancing precision, and correcting spelling errors. By addressing these issues, the writer can work towards achieving a higher band score in the Lexical Resource criteria.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 5

  • Use a Wide Range of Structures:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a limited range of sentence structures. Most sentences are simple or compound, with few complex sentences that could enhance the depth of the argument. For instance, phrases like "This essay agree that it is more beneficial for student to make comments" and "This belief is based teacher can not control a growing number of comments" reflect a basic structure that lacks variety. The use of conjunctions is minimal, and there are instances where clauses could be better integrated to provide more nuanced arguments.
    • How to improve: To diversify sentence structures, the writer should practice using a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences. For example, instead of saying "This essay agree that it is more beneficial for student to make comments," a more complex structure could be: "This essay argues that encouraging students to provide feedback on their teachers can significantly enhance the quality of education." Additionally, incorporating more varied sentence beginnings and using relative clauses can help create a more engaging and sophisticated writing style.
  • Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

    • Detailed explanation: The essay contains numerous grammatical errors and punctuation issues that impede clarity. For example, "This essay agree" should be "This essay agrees," and "teacher will have apporopriate teaching method" lacks an article, which should be "an appropriate teaching method." Additionally, punctuation errors, such as missing commas and periods, contribute to run-on sentences, as seen in "This belief is based teacher can not control a growing number of comments from their student." The incorrect use of "th" instead of "in" further demonstrates a lack of attention to detail.
    • How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should focus on subject-verb agreement, proper article usage, and sentence structure. A useful strategy would be to proofread the essay for common grammatical errors before submission. Additionally, practicing punctuation rules, particularly the use of commas in complex sentences, can enhance clarity. Engaging with grammar exercises or using tools like grammar checkers can also help identify and correct mistakes in real-time.

In summary, to elevate the essay’s band score, the writer should work on varying sentence structures and improving grammatical accuracy and punctuation. Regular practice and revision will be key to achieving these improvements.

Bài sửa mẫu

Improving education quality in high schools is a difficult issue worldwide. This essay argues that it is more beneficial for students to comment on their teachers, as this will enable teachers to employ appropriate teaching methods and prevent them from becoming too complacent, rather than suggesting that teachers should restrict such comments.

It can be seen that allowing students to comment on their teachers will help educators understand students’ learning needs. This is because teachers can easily identify the most effective teaching methods if they receive feedback from students. As a result, students agree that their teachers’ teaching methods are consistent when they provide comments, as this allows teachers to recognize the areas where their students may struggle to understand.

However, some people believe that this practice may lead to a loss of respect and discipline in the classroom. This belief is based on the idea that teachers cannot control the increasing number of comments from their students. For this reason, some argue that teachers should restrict such comments, regardless of students’ opinions. While this point may hold some truth, feedback from students not only helps teachers improve but also establishes a connection between students and teachers.

This writer believes that feedback from students would prevent teachers from becoming too complacent. This is due to the fact that teachers may not improve their teaching methods if they are unaware of their students’ needs, even when the quality of education is lacking. Therefore, teachers should allow students to make comments to enhance the quality of education.

In conclusion, helping teachers understand students’ learning needs and preventing them from becoming too complacent are essential points that need to be considered. Hence, it should be acknowledged that teachers must be receptive when students provide comments or criticism, as the quality of education will improve as a result.

Bài viết liên quan

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more…

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