Research indicates that nowadays some consumers are much less influenced by advertising than in the past. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Research indicates that nowadays some consumers are much less influenced by
advertising than in the past.
What do you think are the reasons for this? Do you think this is a positive or negative
development?

Today, some studies have shown that advertisements are losing effectiveness in influence their consumers compared to previous years. This essay will discuss the cause of this trend and explain why I believe it is a beneficial development.

There are two main reasons why more people are not willing to believe advertising. The first justification is that nowaday there are widespread availability of information. With the rapid development of Internet, consumers can easily access product reviews, compare prices, and read detailed analyses before making purchasing decisions. This access to information empowers consumers to rely less on advertisements and more on independent research. Furthermore, consumers are becoming increasingly aware of misleading information. In fact, many advertisements tend to exaggerate the benefit of products, leading to unrealistic expectations and disappointment. For example, Forever T, a well-known skincare brand, faced backlash when its advertisements promised dramatic anti-aging results that were not supported by evidence. Because of these factors, many consumers have grown wary of exaggerated claims and manipulative tactics often used in ads.

I believe this is a positive phenomenon. Firstly, it contributed to the reduction of impulsive purchase. People who are not easily swayed by ads are more likely to make purchases based on thorough research and genuine needs, which can lead to higher satisfaction with their purchases. When everyone are intelligent buyers, this will prevent the appearance of a society of wasteful consumption. Additionally, it encourages companies to focus on product quality and customer satisfaction rather than just marketing. When consumers prioritize reviews and personal recommendations over advertisements, companies are pressured to improve their offerings. For example, a small business might invest in enhancing its product quality and customer service, knowing that word-of-mouth and positive reviews will have a more substantial impact than traditional advertising.

In conclusion, buyers nowadays are less affected by advertisements due to wide range of information and the increasing skeptism toward ads. I think that this is an positive impact as it helps people prevent unplanned purchase and it also enhaces products’s quality and service.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

1. "nowaday" -> "currently"
   Explanation: "Nowaday" is a nonstandard term and should be replaced with "currently" for formal and academic writing.

2. "influence their consumers" -> "influence consumer behavior"
   Explanation: "Influence their consumers" is awkward and vague. "Influence consumer behavior" is more precise and appropriate for academic discourse.

3. "This essay will discuss" -> "This essay will explore"
   Explanation: "Discuss" is somewhat generic; "explore" suggests a more in-depth analysis, which is more suitable for academic writing.

4. "nowaday" -> "currently"
   Explanation: As mentioned earlier, "nowaday" is nonstandard and should be replaced with "currently" for formal writing.

5. "widespread availability of information" -> "widespread availability of information"
   Explanation: This is redundant as "availability" already implies "widespread." Removing "widespread" maintains clarity and conciseness.

6. "With the rapid development of Internet" -> "With the rapid development of the Internet"
   Explanation: Adding "the" before "Internet" corrects the grammatical error and enhances the formal tone.

7. "consumers can easily access" -> "consumers have easy access to"
   Explanation: "Have easy access to" is a more formal and precise way to express the ability to access information.

8. "more on independent research" -> "more on independent research"
   Explanation: This is grammatically correct and maintains the formal tone.

9. "many advertisements tend to exaggerate" -> "many advertisements often exaggerate"
   Explanation: "Often" is more precise and academically appropriate than "tend to," which is somewhat vague.

10. "Because of these factors, many consumers have grown wary of exaggerated claims and manipulative tactics often used in ads." -> "These factors have led many consumers to become wary of exaggerated claims and manipulative tactics commonly employed in advertisements."
    Explanation: This revision clarifies the causal relationship and uses more formal language.

11. "it contributed to the reduction of impulsive purchase" -> "it contributes to reducing impulsive purchases"
    Explanation: "Contributes to reducing" is grammatically correct and more formal than "contributed to the reduction of."

12. "When everyone are intelligent buyers" -> "When consumers are intelligent buyers"
    Explanation: "Everyone" is too broad and informal; "consumers" is more specific and appropriate for academic writing.

13. "will prevent the appearance of a society of wasteful consumption" -> "will prevent the emergence of a society characterized by wasteful consumption"
    Explanation: "Emergence" is more precise than "appearance," and "characterized by" is more formal than "of."

14. "it enhaces products’s quality and service" -> "it enhances the quality and service of products"
    Explanation: "Enhaces" is a typographical error; "enhances" is the correct form. Also, "the quality and service of products" is grammatically correct.

15. "increasing skeptism toward ads" -> "increasing skepticism towards advertisements"
    Explanation: "Skeptism" is not a word; "skepticism" is correct. Also, "towards" is more formal than "toward," and "advertisements" is more precise than "ads."

These changes enhance the academic tone and precision of the essay, aligning it with formal writing standards.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8

• Answer All Parts of the Question:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses both parts of the prompt. It identifies reasons for the decline in the influence of advertising, such as the availability of information and consumer skepticism. The essay also articulates a clear opinion that this trend is positive, supported by relevant examples. The discussion of the reasons is thorough, particularly the mention of the Forever T skincare brand as a case study of misleading advertising.
  • How to improve: To enhance the response, the writer could consider including additional reasons or perspectives on why consumers are less influenced by advertising, such as the role of social media or the impact of consumer education. This would provide a more comprehensive view of the issue.

• Present a Clear Position Throughout:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position that the decline in advertising influence is a positive development. This stance is consistently reinforced throughout the essay, particularly in the second paragraph where the benefits of informed consumer behavior are discussed. However, the transition between discussing reasons and stating the opinion could be smoother.
  • How to improve: To improve clarity and coherence, the writer could use transitional phrases to better connect the discussion of reasons with the opinion. For example, explicitly stating how the reasons lead to the conclusion that this trend is beneficial would strengthen the argument.

• Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay presents and supports ideas well, particularly in the discussion of how informed consumers can lead to better product quality and reduced impulsive purchases. The use of specific examples, such as the Forever T brand, adds credibility to the arguments. However, some ideas could be further developed, particularly the implications of reduced advertising influence on the marketing industry.
  • How to improve: To enhance the depth of the essay, the writer could elaborate on the potential long-term effects of this trend on both consumers and businesses. For instance, discussing how companies might adapt their marketing strategies in response to changing consumer behavior would provide a richer analysis.

• Stay on Topic:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on the reasons for the decline in advertising influence and the implications of this trend. However, there are minor deviations, such as the phrase "society of wasteful consumption," which could be more clearly linked to the main argument.
  • How to improve: To maintain focus, the writer should ensure that all statements directly relate back to the prompt. Clarifying how reduced impulsive purchases contribute to a more sustainable society would strengthen the relevance of that point. Additionally, proofreading for clarity and coherence can help eliminate any ambiguous phrases that may distract from the main argument.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

• Organize Information Logically:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The main ideas are logically sequenced, with the first paragraph outlining the reasons for reduced influence of advertising and the second discussing the positive implications of this trend. However, the transition between the reasons and the implications could be smoother. For example, the connection between the loss of advertising effectiveness and the benefits to consumers could be more explicitly stated.
  • How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using transitional phrases that explicitly link the ideas between paragraphs. For instance, after discussing the reasons, you could introduce the next paragraph with a phrase like, "These changes not only reflect consumer behavior but also bring about significant benefits." This would help clarify the relationship between the two sections.

• Use Paragraphs:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas. Each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the argument, which aids readability. However, the first body paragraph could be split into two distinct paragraphs: one focusing on the availability of information and the other on consumer skepticism towards advertising. This would allow for a more in-depth exploration of each point.
  • How to improve: Consider dividing the first body paragraph into two separate paragraphs. The first could discuss the impact of accessible information, while the second could address the growing skepticism towards advertising. This would not only improve clarity but also allow for a more detailed examination of each point.

• Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay employs some cohesive devices, such as "Firstly," "Additionally," and "In conclusion," which help to guide the reader through the argument. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat limited, and there are instances where the flow could be improved. For example, the phrase "Because of these factors" could be replaced with a more varied cohesive device to avoid repetition.
  • How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, consider incorporating a wider range of linking words and phrases. Instead of repeatedly using "Firstly" and "Additionally," you could use alternatives like "Moreover," "Furthermore," or "In addition." Additionally, ensure that each cohesive device is used appropriately to enhance clarity and flow. For instance, using "Consequently" when discussing the implications of reduced advertising effectiveness could strengthen the connection between ideas.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of coherence and cohesion, addressing these specific areas can elevate the writing to a higher band score.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

• Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, with terms such as "widespread availability," "empowers," and "manipulative tactics." However, there are instances where the vocabulary could be more varied. For example, the phrase "losing effectiveness" could be replaced with alternatives like "diminishing impact" or "declining efficacy" to enhance lexical variety. The use of "beneficial development" is appropriate but could be enriched with synonyms like "advantageous trend" or "positive shift."
  • How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, the writer should actively seek synonyms and antonyms for common words. Reading a variety of texts can expose them to different expressions and phrases. Additionally, practicing paraphrasing sentences can help in developing a more diverse vocabulary.

• Use Vocabulary Precisely:

  • Detailed explanation: While the essay generally uses vocabulary correctly, there are some imprecise usages. For instance, "influence their consumers" should be "influencing consumers," as "influence" is not used correctly in this context. The phrase "the appearance of a society of wasteful consumption" is somewhat awkward and could be more clearly stated as "the emergence of a wasteful consumer society."
  • How to improve: To improve precision, the writer should focus on the context in which words are used. Engaging in exercises that emphasize collocations (words that commonly go together) can help. Additionally, reviewing grammar rules related to verb forms and sentence structure will aid in achieving more precise language.

• Use Correct Spelling:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay contains several spelling errors, such as "nowaday" (should be "nowadays"), "analyses" (should be "analysis" in this context), "sceptism" (should be "skepticism"), and "enhances products’s quality" (should be "enhances product quality"). These errors detract from the overall clarity and professionalism of the writing.
  • How to improve: To enhance spelling accuracy, the writer should practice spelling common words and terms related to their writing topics. Utilizing spell-check tools and proofreading the essay multiple times can help catch errors. Additionally, maintaining a personal list of frequently misspelled words can be beneficial for ongoing improvement.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents coherent arguments, there is room for improvement in vocabulary range, precision, and spelling accuracy. By focusing on these areas, the writer can work towards achieving a higher band score in future IELTS assessments.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

• Use a Wide Range of Structures:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good variety of sentence structures, including simple, compound, and complex sentences. For instance, the introductory sentence effectively sets the stage for the discussion with a complex structure: "Today, some studies have shown that advertisements are losing effectiveness in influence their consumers compared to previous years." Additionally, the use of phrases like "Firstly" and "For example" helps to organize the ideas clearly. However, there are instances where the sentence structures could be more varied. For example, the phrase "the first justification is that nowaday there are widespread availability of information" could be restructured for better flow and clarity.
  • How to improve: To enhance the variety of sentence structures, consider incorporating more complex sentences that combine multiple clauses. For example, instead of saying "There are two main reasons why more people are not willing to believe advertising," you could say, "One reason that more people are becoming skeptical of advertising is the overwhelming availability of information, which allows them to make informed decisions." Additionally, using a wider range of linking words and phrases can help create more sophisticated transitions between ideas.

• Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that affect clarity. For instance, "influence their consumers" should be "influencing their consumers," and "nowaday" should be "nowadays." The phrase "there are widespread availability of information" is incorrect; it should be "there is widespread availability of information." Furthermore, the sentence "When everyone are intelligent buyers" contains a subject-verb agreement error; it should be "When everyone is an intelligent buyer." Punctuation is generally accurate, but there are a few instances where commas could enhance readability, such as before "which can lead to higher satisfaction with their purchases."
  • How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, it is essential to proofread the essay carefully. Pay particular attention to subject-verb agreement, verb tenses, and the correct use of articles. Additionally, practicing grammar exercises focused on common errors can help reinforce correct usage. For punctuation, consider reviewing rules regarding comma placement, especially in complex sentences, to ensure clarity and enhance the overall flow of the writing.

By addressing these areas, the essay can achieve a higher band score in Grammatical Range and Accuracy.

Bài sửa mẫu

Today, some studies have shown that advertisements are losing effectiveness in influencing consumers compared to previous years. This essay will explore the reasons for this trend and explain why I believe it is a beneficial development.

There are two main reasons why more people are less willing to believe advertising. The first reason is that there is currently widespread availability of information. With the rapid development of the Internet, consumers have easy access to product reviews, can compare prices, and read detailed analyses before making purchasing decisions. This access to information empowers consumers to rely less on advertisements and more on independent research. Furthermore, consumers are becoming increasingly aware of misleading information. In fact, many advertisements often exaggerate the benefits of products, leading to unrealistic expectations and disappointment. For example, Forever T, a well-known skincare brand, faced backlash when its advertisements promised dramatic anti-aging results that were not supported by evidence. Because of these factors, many consumers have grown wary of exaggerated claims and manipulative tactics commonly employed in advertisements.

I believe this is a positive phenomenon. Firstly, it contributes to reducing impulsive purchases. People who are not easily swayed by ads are more likely to make purchases based on thorough research and genuine needs, which can lead to higher satisfaction with their purchases. When consumers are intelligent buyers, this will prevent the emergence of a society characterized by wasteful consumption. Additionally, it encourages companies to focus on product quality and customer satisfaction rather than just marketing. When consumers prioritize reviews and personal recommendations over advertisements, companies are pressured to enhance the quality and service of their products. For example, a small business might invest in improving its product quality and customer service, knowing that word-of-mouth and positive reviews will have a more substantial impact than traditional advertising.

In conclusion, buyers nowadays are less affected by advertisements due to the wide range of information available and the increasing skepticism towards ads. I think that this is a positive impact as it helps people prevent unplanned purchases and also enhances the quality and service of products.