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Research shows that business meetings, discussions, and training are happening online nowadays. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Research shows that business meetings, discussions, and training are happening online nowadays. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

It is commonly believed that many organizations, universities, and companies utilize social apps to hold a meeting, and lectures. In my opinion, this method can bring many benefits for studying and working and its advantages totally outweigh the drawbacks of its.
There were some small disadvantages that using some social apps could bring during the live meetings or lectures. It can be annoying if there is a disruption in the Internet connection which can affect on the quality of the meeting and wast time of all people. Sometimes there can be algorithm errors or manipulation of hacker leading to the corruption in the activation of the apps. Additionally, some apps required users to pay the service fee to get access full-time to the meeting and for some students, the payment is quite large and they cannot afford it.
With the advances in the development of technology, there are many apps with special functions that provide convenient platforms to their users. With this utilization, human interaction becomes easier since students, and workers do not have to spend several hours to go to their workplace as well as their universities. This can help to reduce the number of traffic on the streets and ultimately resolve the traffic congestion and reduce the pollution on the street. To meet tutors, colleagues, and supervisors, there are a few simple steps that need to be done to have a meeting with them. Moreover, modern technology allows the human to directly see their face as well as their friends, and others through just the phone or computer screen. Through the online meetings, the participant can still ask and interact directly with other people in that room and if they even do not want to talk, they can type their questions in the chatbox. During the COVID-19 pandemic, close distance between people was a necessary prevention for the spread of the virus, and some apps like Zoom, and Google meeting became popular apps for people to attend the lectures, discussions or even a conference.
In conclusion, organizing an online meeting brings many benefits for the users like time-saving, convenient and easy operation and these advantages outweigh the drawbacks of using online meetings.


Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

Errors and Improvements:

  1. "utilize social apps" -> "employ social applications"
    Explanation: Replacing "utilize social apps" with "employ social applications" enhances the formality of the language, using a more sophisticated term for "use."

  2. "and its advantages totally outweigh the drawbacks of its" -> "and its advantages significantly outweigh its drawbacks"
    Explanation: "Totally" is an informal word. Replacing it with "significantly" maintains a formal tone. Additionally, the phrase "outweigh the drawbacks of its" is revised for conciseness and clarity.

  3. "There were some small disadvantages that using some social apps could bring" -> "There were minor drawbacks associated with the use of certain social applications"
    Explanation: The revision replaces the informal phrase "small disadvantages that using some social apps could bring" with a more formal and precise expression.

  4. "It can be annoying if there is a disruption in the Internet connection which can affect on the quality of the meeting and wast time of all people." -> "An interruption in the Internet connection can be troublesome, affecting the meeting’s quality and wasting everyone’s time."
    Explanation: The revised sentence removes redundancy and improves clarity by stating the consequences more directly.

  5. "Sometimes there can be algorithm errors or manipulation of hacker leading to the corruption in the activation of the apps." -> "Occasionally, algorithm errors or hacker manipulation can result in the corruption of app activation."
    Explanation: The suggested changes enhance formality and precision, providing a more accurate representation of potential issues.

  6. "Additionally, some apps required users to pay the service fee to get access full-time to the meeting and for some students, the payment is quite large and they cannot afford it." -> "Moreover, certain applications necessitate users to pay a service fee for full-time access to meetings, and for some students, the cost is prohibitive."
    Explanation: The revised sentence uses more formal language, replacing "some apps" with "certain applications" and providing a more precise description of the financial barrier.

  7. "there are many apps with special functions that provide convenient platforms to their users" -> "there are numerous applications with specialized features that offer convenient platforms to users"
    Explanation: The suggested changes enhance formality by using "applications" instead of "apps" and "specialized features" instead of "special functions."

  8. "human interaction becomes easier" -> "interpersonal communication becomes more convenient"
    Explanation: The replacement of "easier" with "more convenient" adds formality and clarity to the sentence.

  9. "This can help to reduce the number of traffic on the streets and ultimately resolve the traffic congestion and reduce the pollution on the street." -> "This can contribute to reducing traffic on the streets, ultimately alleviating congestion and mitigating pollution."
    Explanation: The revised sentence provides a more formal and precise expression of the intended meaning.

  10. "Moreover, modern technology allows the human to directly see their face as well as their friends, and others through just the phone or computer screen." -> "Moreover, modern technology enables individuals to see not only their own faces but also those of their friends and others through a phone or computer screen."
    Explanation: The suggested changes improve formality and clarity, replacing "the human" with "individuals" and rephrasing for smoother readability.

  11. "Through the online meetings, the participant can still ask and interact directly with other people in that room and if they even do not want to talk, they can type their questions in the chatbox." -> "During online meetings, participants can ask questions and interact directly with others in the virtual space. If they choose not to speak, they can type their questions in the chatbox."
    Explanation: The revision enhances formality and clarifies the sequence of actions during online meetings.

  12. "close distance between people was a necessary prevention for the spread of the virus" -> "maintaining physical distance between people was a necessary measure to prevent the spread of the virus"
    Explanation: The suggested changes use more formal language, replacing "close distance" with "physical distance" and providing a clearer expression of the preventive measure.

  13. "and some apps like Zoom, and Google meeting became popular apps for people to attend the lectures, discussions or even a conference." -> "and platforms such as Zoom and Google Meet gained popularity for individuals attending lectures, discussions, or conferences."
    Explanation: The revised sentence maintains formality by using "platforms" instead of "apps" and improves clarity in listing the applications mentioned.

  14. "organizing an online meeting brings many benefits for the users" -> "arranging an online meeting offers numerous benefits for participants"
    Explanation: The replacement of "brings many benefits for the users" with "offers numerous benefits for participants" enhances formality and precision.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7

Band Score: 7.0

  1. Quoted text: "It is commonly believed that many organizations, universities, and companies utilize social apps to hold a meeting, and lectures. In my opinion, this method can bring many benefits for studying and working and its advantages totally outweigh the drawbacks of its."

    • Explanation and Suggestions for Improvement: The introduction clearly presents the writer’s opinion, which is positive towards the use of social apps for meetings and lectures. However, there is a lack of a brief roadmap outlining the main points that will be discussed in the essay. Consider providing a concise preview of the benefits and drawbacks you will elaborate on in the subsequent paragraphs to enhance the structure and guide the reader through your argument.
    • Improved example: "In today’s world, numerous organizations, universities, and companies are leveraging social apps for conducting meetings and lectures. In this essay, I will discuss the myriad benefits of this method for both studying and working, asserting that its advantages significantly outweigh the drawbacks."
  2. Quoted text: "There were some small disadvantages that using some social apps could bring during the live meetings or lectures."

    • Explanation and Suggestions for Improvement: While you acknowledge disadvantages, the essay lacks specific examples and detailed development of these drawbacks. To strengthen your argument, provide concrete instances of disruptions or issues that may arise during online meetings. This will not only add depth to your response but also make your points more convincing.
    • Improved example: "Despite the evident advantages, it’s crucial to acknowledge certain drawbacks. For instance, frequent disruptions in the internet connection during live meetings can significantly impact the quality of interactions. Additionally, the susceptibility to algorithm errors or hacking manipulations may compromise the integrity of the online platform."
  3. Quoted text: "Sometimes there can be algorithm errors or manipulation of hacker leading to the corruption in the activation of the apps. Additionally, some apps required users to pay the service fee to get access full-time to the meeting and for some students, the payment is quite large and they cannot afford it."

    • Explanation and Suggestions for Improvement: Your identification of potential issues is commendable, but to improve, provide specific examples or scenarios illustrating the impact of algorithm errors or hacker manipulations on the activation of apps. Additionally, consider expanding on the financial challenges faced by students, offering more insights into how these payment requirements can be a significant drawback.
    • Improved example: "Algorithm errors or hacker manipulations, for instance, can lead to the corruption of the app’s activation, disrupting the entire meeting. Moreover, the financial burden imposed on students due to service fees can be substantial, hindering access for those with limited financial means."
  4. Quoted text: "With the advances in the development of technology, there are many apps with special functions that provide convenient platforms to their users."

    • Explanation and Suggestions for Improvement: Your argument on the advances in technology is well-stated, but it lacks specific examples or details. To enhance your response, provide concrete instances of these special functions and how they contribute to the convenience of users.
    • Improved example: "The rapid technological advancements have introduced specialized functions in various apps, offering users unparalleled convenience. For instance, features such as seamless video calls, file-sharing capabilities, and real-time collaboration significantly contribute to the efficiency of online meetings."
  5. Quoted text: "During the COVID-19 pandemic, close distance between people was a necessary prevention for the spread of the virus, and some apps like Zoom, and Google meeting became popular apps for people to attend the lectures, discussions or even a conference."

    • Explanation and Suggestions for Improvement: While you touch upon the relevance of online meetings during the COVID-19 pandemic, elaborate further on how these apps facilitated remote interactions and contributed to preventing the spread of the virus. Providing specific examples and details will strengthen your argument.
    • Improved example: "The COVID-19 pandemic necessitated physical distancing to curb the spread of the virus. Apps like Zoom and Google Meetings emerged as indispensable tools during this period, enabling people to attend lectures, engage in discussions, and even participate in conferences, all from the safety of their homes."
  6. Quoted text: "In conclusion, organizing an online meeting brings many benefits for the users like time-saving, convenient and easy operation and these advantages outweigh the drawbacks of using online meetings."

    • Explanation and Suggestions for Improvement: Your conclusion succinctly summarizes your viewpoint. However, to enhance it further, consider reiterating the key benefits mentioned in the body paragraphs, reinforcing your position and leaving a lasting impression on the reader.
    • Improved example: "In conclusion, the benefits of online meetings, including time-saving, convenience, and ease of operation, stand as compelling reasons to favor this method. The advantages highlighted throughout this essay collectively outweigh the identified drawbacks, making online meetings a valuable and efficient mode of communication in today’s digital age."

Overall, while your essay adequately addresses the prompt and presents a clear position, incorporating specific examples and providing more detailed development of your ideas will strengthen your argument and contribute to a more comprehensive response.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation:
The essay demonstrates overall coherence and cohesion, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. There is a reasonable progression of ideas, and the writer attempts to organize information logically. The essay effectively uses cohesive devices, such as transition words and phrases, although there are instances where cohesion within sentences may be somewhat faulty or mechanical. The paragraphing is generally appropriate, though there are occasional lapses in logical organization. The central topic within each paragraph is clear, contributing to overall coherence.

How to improve:

  1. Logical Organization: Ensure a more consistent and logical organization of ideas within paragraphs. This will enhance the overall progression of the essay.
  2. Cohesive Devices: Pay attention to the use of cohesive devices, striving for more natural and seamless connections between sentences.
  3. Paragraphing: Maintain logical paragraphing consistently throughout the essay. Each paragraph should focus on a specific aspect of the argument to enhance clarity and coherence.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score: 7.0

Explanation:
The essay demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary, allowing for some flexibility and precision in conveying ideas. There is an attempt to use less common lexical items, such as "activation of the apps," "traffic congestion," and "prevention for the spread of the virus." The writer also employs some awareness of style and collocation, evident in phrases like "there were some small disadvantages" and "the advantages totally outweigh the drawbacks." Although there are occasional errors in word choice and word formation, such as "wast" instead of "waste" and "its" instead of "it’s," these do not significantly impede communication.

The essay effectively discusses both advantages and disadvantages, providing a clear perspective on the topic. However, there is room for improvement in the precision and accuracy of vocabulary use.

How to improve:
To enhance the lexical resource and move towards a higher band score, the writer should focus on refining word choice and collocation. Careful proofreading is essential to eliminate minor errors, such as "wast" and "its." Additionally, the essay could benefit from the incorporation of more sophisticated lexical features to further elevate the overall vocabulary quality.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation: The essay showcases a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, attempting to convey ideas effectively. However, there are several grammatical errors and issues with punctuation throughout the text. Despite these errors, the communication remains largely intact, though some clarity is lost in places due to the mistakes.

How to improve: To enhance the grammatical range and accuracy, focus on refining sentence structures to include more complex formations. Work on improving punctuation accuracy and grammar to reduce errors that might hinder the overall clarity of the essay. Practicing sentence variety and paying attention to grammatical accuracy will significantly elevate the essay’s quality in future attempts.

Bài sửa mẫu

It is widely accepted that various organizations, universities, and companies utilize social applications to conduct meetings and lectures online. In my view, this approach offers numerous advantages for both studying and working, and its benefits significantly outweigh its drawbacks.

While employing social applications for live meetings or lectures, there can be minor inconveniences. An interruption in the Internet connection, for instance, can be troublesome, affecting the quality of the meeting and wasting everyone’s time. Additionally, algorithm errors or hacker manipulation may lead to the corruption of app activation. Moreover, some applications require users to pay a service fee for full-time access to meetings, and for some students, the cost is prohibitive.

Nevertheless, with the continuous advancement of technology, there are numerous applications with specialized features that provide convenient platforms to users. This not only makes interpersonal communication more convenient but also contributes to reducing traffic on the streets, ultimately alleviating congestion and mitigating pollution. The ease of arranging online meetings has streamlined human interaction, eliminating the need for individuals to spend several hours commuting to their workplace or university.

Furthermore, modern technology enables individuals to see not only their own faces but also those of their friends and others through a phone or computer screen. During online meetings, participants can ask questions and interact directly with others in the virtual space. If they choose not to speak, they can type their questions in the chatbox.

It’s worth noting that during the COVID-19 pandemic, maintaining physical distance between people was a necessary measure to prevent the spread of the virus. Platforms such as Zoom and Google Meet gained popularity for individuals attending lectures, discussions, or conferences, highlighting the adaptability and usefulness of online meeting applications.

In conclusion, organizing an online meeting offers numerous benefits, including time-saving, convenience, and easy operation. These advantages significantly outweigh the drawbacks associated with using online meetings.

Bài viết liên quan

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more…

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