Some people claim that not enough of the waste from homes is recycled. They say that the only way to increase recycling is for governments to make it a legal requirement. To what extent do you think laws are needed to make people recycle more of their waste?
Some people claim that not enough of the waste from homes is recycled. They say that the only way to increase recycling is for governments to make it a legal requirement. To what extent do you think laws are needed to make people recycle more of their waste?
In the today's rapidly changing world, recycling emerge as a major concern for governments to tackle. Some people believe that insufficient domestic waste is recycled so that governments have to make a law in recycling as a legal requirement, leading mary to question its value. While many argue that laws are needed to increasing recycling, there is a contrary view regarding its drawbacks. From my perspective, instead of making a law in recycling, governments launch cycling campaigns as an alternative. In this essay, I will discuss about the efficiency of recycling in law as well as propose an alternative that emphasizes an awareness-raising campaign.
To initiate my argument, making a law in recycle as a legal requirement is accessible to households which is unnecessary. Apparently, it is difficult for people to obey it because households cannot adapt a new recycling law in a matter of minutes. Moreover, it not ascertain that government can apply it easily as well as make sure this law which can sustain efficiently in the long run. So that, it leads many to question its value which brings to individuals as well as societal advancements. For example, in 2018, chinese governments have to abrogate a recycling law because of the difficulty to adapt and reach the optimal efficiency.
On the other hand, law can bring advantages in increasing domestic recycling, but the potential of awareness campaigns in raising individuals' discipline about recycling domestic waste is undeniable. Governments can launch recycling campaigns in local areas to promote their recycling consciousness as well as make time for collect enough waste from homes to recycle. Moreover, governments also collaborate with schools, launching numerous extracurricular activities which focus on the importance of recycling waste. For instance, every month, UK students collect used cans to recycle, leading to the optimal efficiency in recycling campaigns.
In conclusion, it is undeniable that the efficiency of law in increasing recycling waste, but governments can apply an alternative as awareness-raising campaigns in local areas as well as schools. So that, it can come easy to residents for adapting and obeying new recycling requirement
Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng
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"In the today’s rapidly changing world" -> "In today’s rapidly changing world"
Explanation: Removing the apostrophe from "today’s" corrects a grammatical error, making the phrase more formally correct and appropriate for academic writing. -
"recycling emerge as a major concern" -> "recycling has emerged as a major concern"
Explanation: Changing "emerge" to "has emerged" corrects the verb tense to match the past participle form required in this context, enhancing grammatical accuracy. -
"leading mary to question its value" -> "leading many to question its value"
Explanation: Correcting "mary" to "many" fixes a typographical error and ensures the correct use of the word "many" as a pronoun. -
"laws are needed to increasing recycling" -> "laws are needed to increase recycling"
Explanation: Changing "increasing" to "increase" corrects the verb form to match the singular subject "laws," improving grammatical accuracy. -
"making a law in recycling" -> "enacting a law on recycling"
Explanation: Replacing "making a law in recycling" with "enacting a law on recycling" uses more precise and formal language suitable for academic writing. -
"launch cycling campaigns as an alternative" -> "launch awareness campaigns focused on recycling as an alternative"
Explanation: Replacing "cycling campaigns" with "awareness campaigns focused on recycling" clarifies the intended meaning and aligns with the context of recycling. -
"discuss about" -> "discuss"
Explanation: Removing "about" corrects a redundancy, as "discuss" already implies discussion about something. -
"making a law in recycle" -> "enacting a law on recycling"
Explanation: Correcting "in recycle" to "on recycling" fixes a grammatical error and uses the correct preposition for the context. -
"can adapt a new recycling law in a matter of minutes" -> "cannot adapt to a new recycling law immediately"
Explanation: Changing "can adapt a new recycling law in a matter of minutes" to "cannot adapt to a new recycling law immediately" corrects the tense and verb form to better reflect the difficulty of adapting to new laws. -
"it not ascertain that government can apply it easily" -> "it is not certain that governments can easily apply it"
Explanation: Correcting "it not ascertain" to "it is not certain" fixes a grammatical error and clarifies the meaning. -
"make sure this law which can sustain efficiently" -> "ensure that this law can be sustained efficiently"
Explanation: Changing "make sure this law which can sustain" to "ensure that this law can be sustained" corrects the grammatical structure and enhances clarity. -
"chinese governments have to abrogate a recycling law" -> "the Chinese government had to repeal a recycling law"
Explanation: Correcting "chinese governments have to abrogate" to "the Chinese government had to repeal" fixes the grammatical number and tense, and uses more precise terminology ("repeal" instead of "abrogate"). -
"launching numerous extracurricular activities which focus on the importance of recycling waste" -> "conducting numerous extracurricular activities that emphasize the importance of recycling waste"
Explanation: Replacing "launching" with "conducting" and "which" with "that" corrects the preposition and verb choice for a more formal and precise expression. -
"every month, UK students collect used cans to recycle" -> "monthly, UK students collect used cans for recycling"
Explanation: Changing "every month" to "monthly" and "to recycle" to "for recycling" improves the formality and clarity of the sentence. -
"it can come easy to residents for adapting and obeying new recycling requirement" -> "it can be easier for residents to adapt to and comply with new recycling requirements"
Explanation: Replacing "come easy" with "be easier" and "for adapting and obeying" with "to adapt to and comply with" corrects the verb form and prepositional usage, enhancing the sentence’s grammatical correctness and formality.
Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 7
Band Score for Task Response: 7
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Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both the necessity of laws for recycling and alternative methods such as awareness campaigns. The introduction outlines the debate, and the body paragraphs provide arguments for both sides. However, the essay could benefit from a more explicit acknowledgment of the extent to which laws are needed, which is a critical aspect of the prompt. For instance, the phrase "it is undeniable that the efficiency of law in increasing recycling waste" suggests some recognition of the law’s role, but it lacks a clear stance on how essential laws are compared to other methods.
- How to improve: To enhance the response, the writer should explicitly state their position on the extent to which laws are necessary. This could be achieved by providing a clear thesis statement in the introduction that indicates whether the author believes laws are essential, beneficial, or not needed at all, and to what degree.
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Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a position that leans towards advocating for awareness campaigns over legal requirements. However, the clarity of this position fluctuates, particularly in the first body paragraph where the author discusses the drawbacks of laws without sufficiently reinforcing their own stance. Phrases like "it leads many to question its value" could confuse readers about whether the author supports laws or not.
- How to improve: To maintain a clear position, the writer should consistently reinforce their viewpoint throughout the essay. This can be done by using clear topic sentences that reflect the main argument of each paragraph and by summarizing the stance in the conclusion. Additionally, avoiding ambiguous phrases will help clarify the position.
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Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents several ideas, such as the drawbacks of legal requirements and the benefits of awareness campaigns. However, the support for these ideas is somewhat limited. For example, the example of China’s recycling law is relevant but lacks depth and context. Similarly, while the mention of UK students collecting cans is a good illustration, it could be expanded to show how such initiatives lead to increased recycling rates.
- How to improve: To strengthen the support for ideas, the writer should provide more detailed examples and data where possible. This could include statistics on recycling rates before and after campaigns, or more comprehensive case studies that illustrate the effectiveness of awareness initiatives. Additionally, elaborating on how these campaigns can be structured and their potential impact would enhance the argument.
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Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic, focusing on recycling and the role of laws versus awareness campaigns. However, there are moments where the focus wavers, particularly in the first body paragraph, which discusses the challenges of implementing laws without clearly linking back to the main argument about the necessity of laws.
- How to improve: To maintain focus, the writer should ensure that each paragraph directly relates back to the thesis statement. This can be achieved by regularly referencing the prompt and ensuring that each point made contributes to answering the question. Additionally, avoiding unnecessary tangents or overly complex sentences can help keep the writing clear and focused.
Overall, the essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and presents relevant arguments. However, refining the clarity of the position, enhancing the support for ideas, and ensuring a consistent focus on the prompt will help elevate the score further.
Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7
Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7
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Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents a clear argument structure, with an introduction that outlines the main points, followed by body paragraphs that discuss both sides of the issue. However, the logical flow is sometimes hindered by unclear transitions between ideas. For instance, the transition from discussing the drawbacks of legal requirements to the benefits of awareness campaigns could be smoother. The use of phrases like "On the other hand" helps, but additional linking phrases could enhance clarity.
- How to improve: To enhance logical organization, consider using more explicit transitional phrases that guide the reader through the argument. For example, after discussing the drawbacks of laws, a phrase like "Conversely, there are alternative methods that can be more effective" would create a clearer connection to the next point. Additionally, ensuring that each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence can help anchor the reader in the main idea of that section.
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Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, which is essential for clarity. Each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the argument, making it easier for the reader to follow. However, some paragraphs could be better structured. For example, the first body paragraph contains multiple ideas that could be split into two distinct paragraphs—one focusing on the challenges of implementing laws and another on questioning their overall value.
- How to improve: To improve paragraph structure, ensure that each paragraph contains a single main idea supported by relevant examples. Consider breaking longer paragraphs into shorter ones when they contain multiple points. This will not only enhance readability but also allow for more in-depth exploration of each idea.
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Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay employs a variety of cohesive devices, such as "Moreover," "For example," and "On the other hand," which contribute to the overall coherence. However, there is a tendency to rely on a limited range of devices, and some sentences feel abrupt or disconnected. For instance, the phrase "So that, it leads many to question its value" could be better connected to the previous sentence to improve flow.
- How to improve: To diversify cohesive devices, consider incorporating a wider range of linking words and phrases, such as "Furthermore," "In addition," or "Consequently." Additionally, ensure that each cohesive device is used in a contextually appropriate manner. For example, instead of starting a sentence with "So that," rephrase it to "This leads many to question its value," which maintains the connection to the previous thought while improving grammatical accuracy.
By addressing these areas for improvement, the essay can achieve a higher level of coherence and cohesion, potentially leading to an improved band score.
Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6
Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6
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Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, but it lacks the variety and sophistication expected for a higher band score. Phrases like "major concern," "legal requirement," and "awareness-raising campaign" show some attempt at using varied vocabulary. However, terms like "recycling emerge" and "law in recycle" are awkward and detract from the overall clarity of the argument. The use of "accessible" in the context of laws is also somewhat imprecise.
- How to improve: To enhance vocabulary range, the writer should incorporate synonyms and more complex expressions. For example, instead of repeating "recycling," alternatives like "waste management," "resource recovery," or "sustainable practices" could be used. Additionally, varying sentence structures and incorporating more advanced vocabulary related to environmental issues would strengthen the essay.
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Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains instances of imprecise vocabulary usage. For example, "making a law in recycle" should be "making recycling a legal requirement," which is clearer and more accurate. The phrase "it is difficult for people to obey it" could be better expressed as "it is challenging for individuals to comply with such regulations." Furthermore, "not ascertain" is incorrect; the correct phrase would be "it is not certain."
- How to improve: The writer should focus on using vocabulary that accurately conveys their intended meaning. This can be achieved by practicing paraphrasing and ensuring that phrases are grammatically correct. Reading academic articles on recycling and environmental policies can also provide insights into more precise language usage.
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Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several spelling errors, such as "emerge" (should be "emerged"), "mary" (should be "many"), "increasing" (should be "increase"), "not ascertain" (should be "not certain"), and "abrogate" (while correct, it may not be the best choice in context). These errors can distract the reader and undermine the credibility of the argument.
- How to improve: To improve spelling accuracy, the writer should engage in regular spelling practice, perhaps using flashcards or spelling apps. Additionally, proofreading the essay multiple times or using spell-check tools can help catch errors before submission. Reading more can also reinforce correct spelling through exposure to well-written texts.
By addressing these areas of improvement, the writer can enhance their lexical resource and potentially achieve a higher band score in future IELTS writing tasks.
Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5
Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 5
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Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates some variety in sentence structures, such as simple, compound, and complex sentences. For instance, the opening sentence, "In the today’s rapidly changing world, recycling emerge as a major concern for governments to tackle," attempts to use a complex structure but contains grammatical errors. The use of phrases like "some people believe" and "from my perspective" indicates an effort to incorporate different sentence forms. However, the overall range is limited, and many sentences are either overly simplistic or contain errors that hinder clarity, such as "making a law in recycle as a legal requirement is accessible to households which is unnecessary."
- How to improve: To enhance the range of structures, the writer should practice using more complex sentences effectively. This can be achieved by combining ideas using subordinating conjunctions (e.g., although, because, while) and varying the sentence openings. For example, instead of starting sentences with "Governments can…" repeatedly, the writer could begin with phrases like "In addition to government regulations,…" or "While laws may help, awareness campaigns could also…"
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Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors that affect its clarity and coherence. For example, "recycling emerge" should be "recycling emerges," and "it not ascertain" should be "it is not ascertained." Additionally, punctuation issues arise, such as the incorrect use of commas and the lack of necessary punctuation in some sentences. The phrase "So that, it leads many to question its value" is awkwardly constructed and misuses "so that" as a conjunction, which should be replaced with "thus" or "therefore." Overall, these errors contribute to a lack of fluency and may confuse readers.
- How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should focus on subject-verb agreement, verb tenses, and sentence structure. Regular practice with grammar exercises, as well as proofreading for common errors, can help. Additionally, using punctuation correctly will enhance readability. For instance, the writer should ensure that commas are used to separate clauses properly and that sentences are not overly long or convoluted. Reading the essay aloud can also help identify awkward phrasing and grammatical mistakes.
In summary, while the essay shows an attempt to engage with the topic and present arguments, significant improvements in grammatical range and accuracy are needed to achieve a higher band score. Focusing on diversifying sentence structures and correcting grammatical errors will greatly enhance the overall quality of the writing.
Bài sửa mẫu
In today’s rapidly changing world, recycling has emerged as a major concern for governments to tackle. Some people believe that insufficient domestic waste is recycled, so governments have to make recycling a legal requirement, leading many to question its value. While many argue that laws are needed to increase recycling, there is a contrary view regarding its drawbacks. From my perspective, instead of enacting a law on recycling, governments should launch awareness campaigns focused on recycling as an alternative. In this essay, I will discuss the efficiency of recycling laws as well as propose an alternative that emphasizes an awareness-raising campaign.
To initiate my argument, making a law on recycling as a legal requirement is not accessible to households and is unnecessary. Apparently, it is difficult for people to comply with it because households cannot adapt to a new recycling law immediately. Moreover, it is not certain that governments can easily apply it and ensure that this law can be sustained efficiently in the long run. This leads many to question its value, which brings into consideration both individual and societal advancements. For example, in 2018, the Chinese government had to repeal a recycling law because of the difficulty in adapting and reaching optimal efficiency.
On the other hand, while laws can bring advantages in increasing domestic recycling, the potential of awareness campaigns in raising individuals’ discipline about recycling domestic waste is undeniable. Governments can launch recycling campaigns in local areas to promote recycling consciousness and provide time for collecting enough waste from homes to recycle. Moreover, governments can also collaborate with schools, conducting numerous extracurricular activities that emphasize the importance of recycling waste. For instance, every month, UK students collect used cans for recycling, leading to optimal efficiency in recycling campaigns.
In conclusion, while the efficiency of laws in increasing recycling waste is undeniable, governments can apply an alternative approach through awareness-raising campaigns in local areas and schools. This way, it can be easier for residents to adapt to and comply with new recycling requirements.