Some people think technology development decrease crime, while others believe it actually encourage crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

One of the most prevalent trends in the contemporary world is the increasing use of crime-preventive technologies. There is an ongoing debate about whether these technologies promote or reduce criminal activity in society. Both perspectives warrant careful analysis before arriving at a conclusion.

On one hand, proponents argue that technologies like artificial intelligence and centralized databases can aid in crime prevention and detection. The use of algorithmic analysis and facial recognition technology, for example, has helped solve criminal cases efficiently. Additionally, the availability of comprehensive national databases containing fingerprints and criminal histories allows law enforcement to track down suspects more easily. Mobile phone location tracking is another tool that can assist investigations.

On the other hand, critics contend that technological advancements can also be exploited by clever criminals. The dark web and other online platforms provide avenues for learning about and carrying out illicit activities. There have been instances of technologies being misused for purposes like blackmailing celebrities or creating and distributing weapons guides. Militant groups, for example, have been known to utilize technology to plan and execute terrorist attacks.

In my opinion, the net impact of technology on crime is positive, provided these tools are deployed responsibly and ethically. While it is true that some individuals may misuse technology for nefarious ends, the crime-fighting capabilities afforded by modern innovations tend to outweigh the risks. Robust safeguards, effective regulation, and continuous technological progress are key to harnessing the full potential of these technologies to enhance public safety and security.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"One of the most prevalent trends" -> "One of the most widespread trends"
Explanation: "Widespread" is a more precise term in academic contexts, emphasizing the extensive nature of the trend, which is more suitable for formal writing.
"crime-preventive technologies" -> "crime prevention technologies"
Explanation: "Crime prevention technologies" is a more direct and commonly used term in academic and professional contexts, enhancing clarity and specificity.
"There is an ongoing debate" -> "There persists a debate"
Explanation: "There persists a debate" is a more formal and academically appropriate way to express ongoing discussions, avoiding the colloquial tone of "is an ongoing debate."
"aid in crime prevention and detection" -> "facilitate crime prevention and detection"
Explanation: "Facilitate" is a more precise verb that implies enabling or making easier, which is more appropriate for describing the role of technologies in crime prevention and detection.
"has helped solve" -> "has assisted in solving"
Explanation: "Has assisted in solving" is more formal and precise, aligning better with academic style by emphasizing the role of technology in the process of solving crimes.
"allows law enforcement to track down" -> "enables law enforcement to locate"
Explanation: "Enables" is a more formal synonym for "allows," and "locate" is a more precise term than "track down" in this context, fitting better in an academic discussion.
"Mobile phone location tracking" -> "mobile phone location tracking technology"
Explanation: Adding "technology" clarifies that the focus is on the specific tool being discussed, enhancing specificity and formality.
"clever criminals" -> "resourceful criminals"
Explanation: "Resourceful" is a more neutral and academically appropriate term than "clever," which can carry a slightly informal or colloquial tone.
"The dark web and other online platforms" -> "the dark web and other online platforms"
Explanation: This is a minor correction to maintain parallel structure and clarity in the list of examples.
"There have been instances of technologies being misused" -> "there have been instances of technology misuse"
Explanation: "Technology misuse" is a more concise and formal way to describe the misuse of technology, improving the flow and formality of the sentence.
"creating and distributing weapons guides" -> "creating and disseminating weapons guides"
Explanation: "Disseminating" is a more formal term than "distributing," which is typically used in academic and professional contexts.
"Militant groups, for example, have been known to utilize technology" -> "For example, militant groups have utilized technology"
Explanation: Reordering the sentence to "For example, militant groups have utilized technology" improves the flow and formality of the sentence, making it more suitable for academic writing.
"Robust safeguards, effective regulation, and continuous technological progress" -> "robust safeguards, effective regulations, and continuous technological advancements"
Explanation: "Regulations" and "advancements" are more precise and formal terms, enhancing the academic tone and specificity of the statement.
"enhance public safety and security" -> "enhance public safety and security measures"
Explanation: Adding "measures" specifies the type of enhancements being discussed, aligning with the formal and precise language expected in academic writing.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Task Response: 5 – UNDER WORD

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay adequately addresses both perspectives on the impact of technology on crime. It discusses how technology can both prevent and encourage crime, providing examples such as AI in crime detection and the dark web for criminal activities.
- How to improve: To enhance, ensure each viewpoint is equally developed. The discussion on technology encouraging crime could be expanded with more specific examples and statistics to support the argument.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The writer maintains a consistent stance favoring the positive impact of technology on crime prevention, arguing that benefits outweigh risks when used responsibly.
- How to improve: To improve clarity, reinforce the position with stronger language throughout the essay, emphasizing the positive impact of technology on crime reduction.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents ideas clearly, supported by examples such as AI and databases for crime prevention, and the misuse of technology for criminal activities. However, some examples lack depth and could benefit from further elaboration.
- How to improve: Extend examples by discussing real-world cases or studies that demonstrate the effectiveness or misuse of specific technologies. This will strengthen the argument and provide more compelling evidence.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay predominantly stays on topic, discussing technology’s dual role in crime prevention and crime encouragement. However, it briefly touches on regulations and ethical considerations without fully connecting them back to the main topic.
- How to improve: To maintain focus, ensure all points, including regulations and ethics, directly relate to the impact of technology on crime. Clearly articulate how these factors influence the debate about crime prevention versus encouragement.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic with balanced arguments. Strengthening specific examples and maintaining a consistent focus on the main topic throughout will further enhance clarity and depth, potentially elevating the score to address any deficiencies noted in the "under word" band.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 8

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay exhibits a high level of logical organization throughout. It begins with a clear introduction that introduces the topic and outlines the debate. Each subsequent paragraph is dedicated to exploring one side of the argument in depth before smoothly transitioning to the opposing viewpoint. The conclusion succinctly summarizes the author’s opinion without introducing new information. For instance, the paragraph on technology aiding crime prevention is followed logically by the paragraph discussing its potential for misuse by criminals.
- How to improve: While the overall logical structure is strong, ensuring a seamless transition between paragraphs could further enhance coherence. Using more transitional phrases could help guide the reader through the essay more smoothly.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively employs paragraphs to organize ideas and maintain focus within each section. Each paragraph begins with a clear topic sentence that previews the main idea, followed by supporting details and examples that expand on the topic. This structured approach not only aids readability but also reinforces the coherence of the essay as a whole.
- How to improve: To strengthen paragraph cohesion further, consider refining the topic sentences to more explicitly connect back to the essay’s overall argument. Additionally, varying sentence structures within paragraphs could add nuance and depth to the analysis.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay makes adept use of cohesive devices to link ideas and arguments across paragraphs. Examples include cohesive devices such as ‘on the one hand… on the other hand’ for presenting contrasting viewpoints, as well as ‘Additionally’, ‘On the other hand’, and ‘In my opinion’ to introduce new ideas and transitions between different parts of the essay.
- How to improve: While the current use of cohesive devices is effective, integrating a wider variety of transition words and phrases could further enrich the essay’s coherence. For instance, incorporating causal connectors (‘therefore’, ‘as a result’) or exemplifiers (‘for example’, ‘in particular’) could provide more nuanced connections between ideas and strengthen the argumentative flow.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a sophisticated understanding of coherence and cohesion, which is characteristic of an IELTS Band 8 response. By refining transitional phrases and diversifying cohesive devices, the essay could potentially achieve an even smoother and more nuanced flow of ideas, further enhancing its overall coherence and cohesion.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 7

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of vocabulary throughout. For instance, terms like "crime-preventive technologies," "algorithmic analysis," "facial recognition technology," and "illicit activities" showcase a nuanced understanding of the topic. These lexical choices effectively support the discussion of both perspectives on the impact of technology on crime.
- How to improve: To further enrich the lexical range, consider integrating more specific domain-specific vocabulary related to technology and crime prevention. For example, introducing terms like "biometric identification" or "cybersecurity measures" could enhance precision and depth in discussing technological influences on crime.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally employs vocabulary with precision. However, there are instances where broader terms could be substituted with more specific terminology. For instance, replacing "technologies" with more specific terms like "surveillance technologies" or "digital forensic tools" would enhance clarity and precision.
- How to improve: Aim to consistently use specialized vocabulary that precisely fits the context. Consider defining terms like "dark web" or "militant groups" explicitly to ensure clarity and avoid any ambiguity in understanding the discussion.
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a high level of spelling accuracy with very few errors. Words such as "algorithmic," "comprehensive," and "nefarious" are correctly spelled throughout the essay.
- How to improve: Maintain this level of accuracy by proofreading carefully and considering the spell-check function during the writing process. Pay particular attention to technical terms and uncommon vocabulary to ensure they are spelled correctly.

Overall, this essay effectively utilizes a broad vocabulary to explore the complexities of technology’s impact on crime. To enhance further, focus on integrating more specialized vocabulary and ensuring consistent precision in terminology usage.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 7

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of sentence structures. It employs complex sentences ("One of the most prevalent trends…"), compound sentences ("Both perspectives warrant…"), and uses of participle phrases ("proponents argue that technologies like…"). These structures enhance readability and convey complex ideas effectively.
- How to improve: To further enrich the range of structures, consider integrating more conditional sentences ("If technology continues to advance…"), rhetorical questions ("Can technology truly be blamed for…"), or inversion for emphasis ("Not only do technologies prevent crime…"). These additions can elevate the sophistication of the essay.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: Overall, the essay maintains a high level of grammatical accuracy. There are very few errors throughout the text. For instance, the use of articles, verb tenses, and subject-verb agreement is consistently correct. Punctuation is generally well-applied, aiding clarity and flow.
- How to improve: While the essay is strong grammatically, attention to minor details such as comma usage in complex sentences or ensuring consistency in tense shifts (e.g., present perfect vs. simple past) can further polish the writing. Reviewing these nuances will help maintain the high standard of grammatical accuracy observed.

Overall, the essay effectively demonstrates a strong command of grammatical structures and accuracy, aligning well with a Band Score of 7.

Bài sửa mẫu

One of the most widespread trends in today’s world is the use of crime prevention technologies. There persists a debate about whether these technologies facilitate crime prevention and detection or actually encourage criminal activity in society. Both perspectives merit careful consideration.

On one hand, advocates argue that technologies such as artificial intelligence and centralized databases have assisted in solving criminal cases efficiently. For instance, algorithmic analysis and facial recognition technology enable law enforcement to locate suspects more effectively. Moreover, national databases containing fingerprints and criminal histories enable quicker suspect identification. Mobile phone location tracking technology is also a resourceful tool for investigations.

Conversely, critics argue that technology can be exploited by resourceful criminals. Platforms like the dark web provide opportunities for learning about and perpetrating illicit activities. Instances of technology misuse include blackmailing celebrities or disseminating guides on creating weapons. Militant groups, for example, have utilized technology to plan and execute attacks.

In my view, the overall impact of technology on crime is positive, provided that these tools are used responsibly and ethically. Although there are risks associated with misuse, the crime prevention capabilities offered by modern innovations generally outweigh these concerns. To maximize their benefits, robust safeguards, effective regulations, and ongoing technological advancements are essential in enhancing public safety and security measures.