Task 1: The chart below shows the changes in the percentage of households with cars in one European country between 1971 and 2001. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart compares the difference in the rate of owning vehicles per families in one European country from 1971 to 2001.
Overall, over the period given, a number of families possessed at least one car slightly increasing, on the contrary, the percentage of household without vehicles decreased dramatically through decades.
To begin with, in the first decade, notably the proportion of families without cars occupied the highest rates particularly in 1971 a half of households did not obtain a vehicle, after 10 years, this figures declined gradually to above 40%. There was no dramatic change in the percentage of owning one car, meanwhile a number of families having two car increased from 18% to approximately 30% in 1981.
In the remaining period, the percentage of households without cars continually reduced to around 30% in the last decade. Recording a significant growth on holding one car per families, which rapidly increased in 1991 to 50% before falling slowly to above 40%, but this rate still accounted for the highest number in the period. The portion of families owning two cars still fluctuated with no considerable difference.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"The chart compares the difference in the rate of owning vehicles per families" -> "The chart compares the variation in vehicle ownership rates among families"
Explanation: "The variation in vehicle ownership rates among families" is more precise and formal, avoiding the awkward phrasing and the plural form "families" which is less common in academic writing.
"a number of families possessed at least one car slightly increasing" -> "the number of families owning at least one car increased slightly"
Explanation: "the number of families owning at least one car increased slightly" corrects the grammatical structure and uses more formal language, enhancing clarity and precision.
"on the contrary, the percentage of household without vehicles decreased dramatically through decades" -> "conversely, the proportion of households without vehicles decreased significantly over the decades"
Explanation: "Conversely" is a more formal alternative to "on the contrary," and "proportion" is more precise than "percentage" in this context. "Significantly" is preferred over "dramatically" for academic tone.
"notably the proportion of families without cars occupied the highest rates" -> "notably, the proportion of families without cars held the highest rates"
Explanation: Adding a comma after "notably" corrects the punctuation, and "held" is a more precise verb than "occupied" in this context.
"a half of households did not obtain a vehicle" -> "half of households did not possess a vehicle"
Explanation: "Possess" is more appropriate than "obtain" in this context, as it directly relates to ownership.
"this figures declined" -> "these figures declined"
Explanation: "These figures" is grammatically correct and pluralizes the noun to match the plural verb "declined."
"a number of families having two car" -> "a number of families owning two cars"
Explanation: "Owning" is the correct verb for describing possession, and "cars" should be plural to match the plural subject "families."
"Recording a significant growth on holding one car per families" -> "Recording significant growth in the number of households owning one car"
Explanation: "Recording significant growth in the number of households owning one car" corrects the awkward phrase and clarifies the meaning, using more formal language.
"per families" -> "per family"
Explanation: "Per family" is the correct prepositional phrase for describing the relationship between the number and the unit of measurement.
"the portion of families owning two cars still fluctuated with no considerable difference" -> "the proportion of households owning two cars still fluctuated with little variation"
Explanation: "Proportion" is more precise than "portion," and "little variation" is a more academic way of saying "no considerable difference."

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation: The essay provides an overview of the main trends in car ownership in the European country. It identifies the key features of the chart, such as the decrease in households without cars and the increase in households with one car. However, the essay does not fully extend the key features and some details are irrelevant or inaccurate. For example, the essay states that the percentage of households with two cars "fluctuated with no considerable difference," which is not accurate.

How to improve: The essay could be improved by providing more specific details about the trends in car ownership. For example, the essay could state that the percentage of households with one car increased from 18% in 1971 to 50% in 1991. The essay could also provide more accurate information about the trends in households with two cars. For example, the essay could state that the percentage of households with two cars increased from 18% in 1971 to 30% in 1981, but then decreased to 28% in 2001.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0
Explanation: The essay arranges information and ideas coherently with a clear overall progression. The writer effectively uses cohesive devices, but there are some instances where cohesion within or between sentences may be faulty or mechanical. The central topic within each paragraph is clear, but paragraphing may not always be logical.
How to improve: To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on ensuring that the transitions between sentences and paragraphs are smooth and logical. Make sure that the use of cohesive devices is consistent and appropriate throughout the essay. Additionally, work on organizing ideas in a more structured and logical manner to enhance overall coherence.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation: essay demonstrates an adequate of vocabulary for the task, with attempts to use less common vocabulary. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation that impact the overall fluency and precision of the essay. The errors in spelling and word formation do not impede communication but are noticeable.

How to improve: To improve the Lexical Resource score, focus on using a wider range of vocabulary with more accuracy in word choice and collocation. Pay attention to spelling and word formation to enhance the overall clarity and sophistication of the essay. Additionally, try to incorporate more uncommon lexical items to elevate the language used in the essay.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates mix of simple and complex sentence forms, with some errors in grammar and punctuation. The essay attempts to use a variety of structures, but there are noticeable errors that occasionally affect communication. While there is an attempt at complexity in sentence structure, the accuracy is lacking in some instances, which may cause some difficulty for the reader.

How to improve: To improve the grammatical range and accuracy, focus on using a wider range of structures with more accuracy. Pay attention to verb tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and punctuation. Proofreading the essay carefully can help identify and correct errors to enhance clarity and coherence. Additionally, practice incorporating more complex sentence structures to improve overall fluency and precision in writing.

Bài sửa mẫu

The provided chart illustrates the changes in the percentage of households with cars in a single European country from 1971 to 2001. Overall, there was a slight increase in the number of families owning at least one car, while the percentage of households without vehicles experienced a significant decrease over the decades.

Initially, in 1971, half of the households did not possess a car, with this figure gradually decreasing to just above 40% by 1981. The proportion of families owning one car remained relatively stable, while the percentage of households with two cars increased from 18% to around 30% in the same period.

In the following years, the percentage of households without cars continued to decrease, reaching approximately 30% by 2001. The percentage of families owning one car saw a notable increase in 1991, peaking at 50% before gradually declining to just above 40%. However, this remained the highest percentage throughout the period. The percentage of households owning two cars fluctuated with no significant changes.

Overall, the data indicates a gradual increase in car ownership among families in the European country over the specified period, with a simultaneous decrease in the percentage of households without vehicles.