The chart below shows the number of different types of vehicles registered in European use from 1996 to 2006. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparison where relevant.

The private cars in 1996 have 19 millions, and them in 2006 have 24 millions. They have change 26,32%. The motorcycles in 1996 have one millions. They have changes -40% because in 2006 they have been used 0,6 million

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"The private cars in 1996 have 19 millions" -> "The number of private cars in 1996 was approximately 19 million"
Explanation: The original phrase is grammatically incorrect and unclear. The suggested revision clarifies the meaning and uses the correct form of the verb "was" to indicate a past state.
"them in 2006 have 24 millions" -> "them in 2006 was approximately 24 million"
Explanation: Similar to the previous correction, this revision corrects the grammatical error and specifies the number as a million, not millions.
"They have change 26,32%" -> "They increased by 26.32%"
Explanation: "They have change" is grammatically incorrect and unclear. "Increased by" is the correct phrase for describing a percentage change in quantity.
"The motorcycles in 1996 have one millions" -> "The number of motorcycles in 1996 was one million"
Explanation: Corrects the grammatical error and specifies the number as a million, not "one millions."
"They have changes -40%" -> "They decreased by 40%"
Explanation: "They have changes" is incorrect; "decreased by" is the correct phrase for describing a negative percentage change.
"because in 2006 they have been used 0,6 million" -> "because in 2006, they were used approximately 0.6 million"
Explanation: The original phrase is grammatically incorrect and unclear. The revision corrects the grammar and clarifies the meaning by specifying the approximate number.

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 4

Band Score: 4

Explanation: The essay attempts to address the task by selecting and reporting some features of the chart. However, it does not cover all key features/bullet points. The essay only focuses on two types of vehicles (private cars and motorcycles) and does not mention the other types of vehicles. The essay also does not provide a clear overview of the main trends in the chart.

How to improve: The essay could be improved by providing a more comprehensive overview of the chart, including all types of vehicles. The essay should also highlight the main trends in the data, such as the increase in private cars and the decrease in motorcycles. The essay should also be written in a more formal and academic style.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 4

Band Score: 4.0
Explanation: The essay presents some information regarding the number of vehicles registered, but it lacks coherent organization and clear progression. The ideas are not arranged logically, making it difficult for the reader to follow the information being presented. There is an attempt to use cohesive devices, but they are often inaccurate or repetitive. The paragraphing is either absent or confusing, which further detracts from the overall coherence of the response.
How to improve: To achieve a higher band score, the writer should focus on organizing the information logically, ensuring that there is a clear progression of ideas. Using a variety of cohesive devices correctly will help connect sentences and paragraphs more effectively. Additionally, the writer should ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic and that the data is presented accurately and comprehensively. Finally, practicing paragraphing by clearly separating different ideas or data points will enhance the overall clarity of the essay.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 4

Band Score: 4.0
Explanation: The essay demonstrates a basic use of vocabulary, but it is limited and repetitive. The phrases used are simplistic and do not convey the necessary precision or variety expected for higher bands. There are noticeable errors in word choice ("have" instead of "were," "them" instead of "those"), and the use of numbers is inconsistent (e.g., "19 millions" should be "19 million"). The overall lexical resource does not adequately meet the task requirements, leading to potential confusion for the reader.
How to improve: To enhance the lexical resource, the writer should aim to use a wider range of vocabulary, including synonyms and more complex phrases. Avoiding repetition and incorporating more precise terms related to data presentation would also be beneficial. Additionally, ensuring correct word forms and grammatical structures will improve clarity and coherence. For example, instead of "have 19 millions," the writer could say "there were 19 million private cars registered."

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 4

Band Score: 4.0
Explanation: The essay demonstrates a very limited range of grammatical structures, primarily using simple sentence forms. While there are some attempts to convey comparisons and changes in data, the frequent grammatical errors, such as incorrect verb forms ("have" instead of "were") and pluralization issues ("one millions" instead of "one million"), significantly hinder clarity. Additionally, the use of "them" in "them in 2006" is incorrect and contributes to a lack of coherence. Overall, the errors predominate, making it difficult for the reader to fully grasp the intended meaning.
How to improve: To improve the grammatical range and accuracy, the writer should focus on using a wider variety of sentence structures, including complex sentences with subordinate clauses. Practicing correct verb forms and subject-verb agreement is essential. Additionally, ensuring that comparisons are clearly articulated and avoiding vague pronouns will enhance clarity. Regular grammar exercises and seeking feedback on writing can also help in reducing errors.

Bài sửa mẫu

The number of private cars registered in 1996 was 19 million, and by 2006, this figure had increased to 24 million. This represents a change of 26.32%. In contrast, the number of motorcycles registered in 1996 was 1 million. However, by 2006, this number had decreased to 0.6 million, indicating a change of -40%.