The diagram below how tomato ketchup is made. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features.

The diagram below how tomato ketchup is made.
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features.

The diagram illustrates the production of tomato ketchup.

Overall, there are fifteen steps in the productiob of tomato ketchup, starting at harvesting tomatoes manuallt and ending at using finished as a sauce in some meals.

Firstly, the farmers collect ripe tomatoes from gardens and then sort them to remove those below the acceptable standard, both of these steps are manual. Next, the chosen tomatoes are dispatched to factories where they are skinned, their stalks and seeds are removed as well. The process continues when these tomatoes are placed into a container and flavoured spices such as sugar, vinegar and salt into tomatoes liquid after being crushed. The eighth step involves boiling the mixture which then is left for two hours rest.

At the following stage, the tomato ketchup which is already cool, is poured into bottles. Subsequently, the labelled ketchup bottles are being checked by the quality control to ensure if the ketchup meets standards to be packed into boxes. Finally, a distribution of ketchup bottles is widely available in supermarkets for serving consumers to enhance the flavor in some meals, for example, hamburgers or fries.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"manuallt" -> "manually"
Explanation: Correcting the spelling error from "manuallt" to "manually" ensures the word is spelled correctly and maintains professionalism in the text.
"finished as a sauce in some meals" -> "used as a condiment in various dishes"
Explanation: Replacing "finished as a sauce in some meals" with "used as a condiment in various dishes" refines the language by using more precise terminology ("condiment" instead of "sauce") and broadening the context ("various dishes" instead of "some meals").
"the farmers collect" -> "farmers collect"
Explanation: Removing the definite article "the" before "farmers" corrects the grammatical error, as "farmers" is a general term and does not require the article.
"both of these steps are manual" -> "both steps are manual"
Explanation: Removing "these" corrects the redundancy, as "steps" is already specific, making the phrase more concise and formal.
"dispatched to factories" -> "transported to factories"
Explanation: Replacing "dispatched" with "transported" provides a more accurate and formal term for the movement of goods, aligning better with academic language.
"flavoured spices such as sugar, vinegar and salt into tomatoes liquid" -> "added flavorings such as sugar, vinegar, and salt to the tomato liquid"
Explanation: Changing "flavoured" to "added flavorings" corrects the verb tense and uses "flavorings" to specify the type of additives, enhancing clarity and formality.
"boiling the mixture which then is left for two hours rest" -> "boiling the mixture, which is then left to rest for two hours"
Explanation: Changing the punctuation and adding "to" before "rest" corrects the grammatical structure and improves readability.
"the labelled ketchup bottles are being checked" -> "the labeled ketchup bottles are checked"
Explanation: Changing "are being checked" to "are checked" corrects the tense to match the rest of the passive voice, enhancing the formal tone.
"ensure if the ketchup meets standards" -> "ensure that the ketchup meets the standards"
Explanation: Adding "that" corrects the grammatical structure, making the sentence more formal and precise.
"a distribution of ketchup bottles" -> "the distribution of ketchup bottles"
Explanation: Changing "a" to "the" corrects the definite article usage, indicating a specific distribution process.
"widely available in supermarkets for serving consumers" -> "widely available in supermarkets for consumer use"
Explanation: Replacing "for serving consumers" with "for consumer use" refines the phrase to a more formal and precise expression.
"to enhance the flavor in some meals" -> "to enhance flavor in various dishes"
Explanation: Replacing "the flavor in some meals" with "flavor in various dishes" corrects the article usage and broadens the context, aligning with academic style.

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6

Explanation: The essay provides an overview of the process of making tomato ketchup, but it does not fully satisfy all the requirements of the task. The essay lists the steps in the process, but it does not adequately highlight the key features of the process. For example, the essay does not mention that the tomatoes are crushed and boiled, which are important steps in the process.

How to improve: The essay could be improved by providing a more detailed overview of the process, highlighting the key features of each step. The essay could also be improved by using more specific vocabulary to describe the process. For example, instead of saying "the tomatoes are dispatched to factories," the essay could say "the tomatoes are transported to factories."

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5.0
Explanation: The essay presents information about the process of making tomato ketchup, but it lacks clear overall progression and organization. While it attempts to describe the steps involved, the sequencing of ideas is not entirely logical, and there are instances of awkward phrasing that disrupt the flow. The use of cohesive devices is present but inconsistent, leading to some confusion in the relationships between ideas. Additionally, paragraphing is inadequate, as the essay does not effectively separate different stages of the process, making it harder for the reader to follow.

How to improve: To enhance coherence and cohesion, the essay could benefit from clearer paragraphing, with each paragraph dedicated to a specific stage of the ketchup production process. Additionally, improving the logical flow of information by ensuring that each step follows naturally from the previous one would help. Using a wider range of cohesive devices more effectively and avoiding repetition would also strengthen the essay. Finally, proofreading for grammatical errors and awkward phrasing would improve clarity and readability.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5.0
Explanation: The essay demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary that is minimally adequate for the task. While it attempts to describe the process of making tomato ketchup, the use of vocabulary is basic and repetitive, with several noticeable errors in spelling and word formation (e.g., "productiob," "manuallt," "flavoured spices"). These errors may cause some difficulty for the reader, impacting overall clarity. The essay does not effectively utilize less common lexical items or demonstrate a strong awareness of style and collocation, which are necessary for a higher band score.
How to improve: To improve the lexical resource score, the writer should aim to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary, including less common words and phrases relevant to the topic. Additionally, careful proofreading to correct spelling and word formation errors is essential. Using synonyms to avoid repetition and enhancing the precision of word choice will also contribute to a more sophisticated lexical presentation.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5.0
Explanation: The essay demonstrates a limited range of grammatical structures, primarily employing simple sentence forms with some attempts at complex sentences. While the writer attempts to convey the process clearly, frequent grammatical errors and awkward phrasing detract from the overall clarity. For example, phrases like "the productiob of tomato ketchup" and "the labelled ketchup bottles are being checked by the quality control" contain errors that can confuse the reader. Additionally, the use of punctuation is inconsistent, which can lead to misunderstandings in the flow of information. Overall, the errors present can cause some difficulty for the reader, aligning with the descriptors for Band 5.
How to improve: To enhance the grammatical range and accuracy, the writer should focus on the following:

Increase Sentence Variety: Incorporate a wider range of sentence structures, including more complex sentences, to demonstrate flexibility in grammar.
Proofreading: Carefully proofread the essay to catch and correct typographical errors and grammatical mistakes before submission.
Punctuation Practice: Work on proper punctuation usage to ensure clarity and coherence in writing.
Grammar Exercises: Engage in targeted grammar exercises to improve accuracy in verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and sentence construction.

Bài sửa mẫu

The diagram illustrates the production of tomato ketchup.

Overall, there are fifteen steps in the production of tomato ketchup, starting with the manual harvesting of tomatoes and ending with the use of the finished product as a sauce in various meals.

Firstly, the farmers collect ripe tomatoes from gardens and then sort them to remove those below the acceptable standard; both of these steps are manual. Next, the selected tomatoes are dispatched to factories where they are skinned, and their stalks and seeds are also removed. The process continues as these tomatoes are placed into a container, and flavored spices such as sugar, vinegar, and salt are added to the crushed tomato liquid. The eighth step involves boiling the mixture, which is then left to rest for two hours.

At the following stage, the cooled tomato ketchup is poured into bottles. Subsequently, the labeled ketchup bottles are checked by quality control to ensure that the ketchup meets the required standards before being packed into boxes. Finally, the distribution of ketchup bottles makes them widely available in supermarkets for consumers to enhance the flavor of various meals, such as hamburgers or fries.