the diagram show the structure of solar panel and its use.

The diagrams illustrate the design of a basic solar panel and its mechanism for generating energy.

Overall, the panel's structure, comprising a limited number of components, is straightforward and effectively harnesses solar radiation to heat either air or water. caban quat khai thác bản ( plạp)

Initially, the solar panel's design is uncomplicated, featuring a rectangular enclosure with a transparent glass surface that captures solar radiation. This radiation heats either air or water flowing through the system, facilitated by inlets and outlets located on either side of the panel. This basic structure allows for the efficient harnessing of solar energy, making it a fundamental component in the generation of renewable e ewable energy. phaned ban

The energy generation process operates by harnessing solar power. Firstly, sunlight is absorbed by the transparent glass, capturing the solar radiation within the panel. This captured energy subsequently heats the air flowing through the system. Similarly, if the system contains water, it is heated in a manner analogous to that of air.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"caban quat khai thác bản" -> "the diagrams illustrate"
Explanation: The original phrase appears to be a Vietnamese phrase that is not relevant to the context. Replacing it with "the diagrams illustrate" clarifies the introduction and aligns with formal academic language.
"comprising a limited number of components" -> "consisting of a few components"
Explanation: "Comprising" is correct but "consisting of a few" is more precise and academically appropriate, emphasizing the simplicity of the design.
"is straightforward and effectively harnesses" -> "is straightforward and effectively utilizes"
Explanation: "Harnesses" is correct but "utilizes" is more formal and commonly used in academic texts to describe the use of resources or systems.
"caban quat khai thác bản" -> "the panel’s design"
Explanation: This phrase is a repetition of the previous error and is not necessary. Removing it maintains clarity and avoids redundancy.
"phaned ban" -> "the energy generation process"
Explanation: This appears to be a typographical error or a non-standard term. Replacing it with "the energy generation process" corrects the terminology and enhances readability.
"e ewable energy" -> "renewable energy"
Explanation: "E ewable" is a typographical error. Correcting it to "renewable" ensures accuracy and professionalism in the text.
"phaned ban" -> "the energy generation process"
Explanation: This appears to be a typographical error or a non-standard term. Replacing it with "the energy generation process" corrects the terminology and enhances clarity.

These changes improve the essay’s clarity, precision, and adherence to formal academic style, ensuring that the vocabulary is appropriate for an academic context.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Task Response: 5 – UNDER WORD

Answer All Parts of the Question:
- Detailed explanation: The essay attempts to address the prompt by describing the structure of a solar panel and its mechanism for generating energy. However, it lacks a comprehensive overview of both the structure and the use of the solar panel. For instance, while the essay mentions the components of the solar panel, it does not adequately explain how these components work together or the specific applications of the energy generated. The phrase "caban quat khai thác bản ( plạp)" appears to be an incomplete thought or irrelevant text that detracts from the overall clarity and focus of the response.
- How to improve: To improve, the essay should ensure that it fully addresses both aspects of the prompt. This can be achieved by providing a clear description of the solar panel’s structure, including all key components, and elaborating on its uses in practical scenarios, such as heating water for residential use or powering homes.
Present a Clear Position Throughout:
- Detailed explanation: The essay does not present a clear position, as it primarily focuses on describing the solar panel without establishing a specific viewpoint or argument. The lack of a clear thesis statement or consistent narrative makes it difficult for the reader to understand the author’s perspective on the importance or implications of solar panels.
- How to improve: To enhance clarity and consistency, the author should formulate a clear thesis statement at the beginning of the essay. This statement should outline the main points that will be discussed, and the author should consistently refer back to this position throughout the essay to maintain focus and coherence.
Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents some ideas about the solar panel’s structure and function but fails to extend or support these ideas effectively. For example, while it mentions that the panel captures solar radiation, it does not delve into the significance of this process or provide examples of its benefits. Additionally, the use of phrases like "ewable energy" suggests a lack of proofreading, which undermines the credibility of the information presented.
- How to improve: To improve the presentation and support of ideas, the author should aim to elaborate on each point made. This could include discussing the environmental benefits of solar energy, potential cost savings for users, or advancements in solar technology. Providing specific examples or statistics could also strengthen the argument and make the essay more persuasive.
Stay on Topic:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally stays on topic but includes irrelevant phrases and incomplete thoughts, such as "caban quat khai thác bản ( plạp)" and "phaned ban," which disrupt the flow and coherence of the writing. These distractions can confuse the reader and detract from the main focus of the essay.
- How to improve: To maintain focus and relevance, the author should carefully proofread the essay to eliminate any extraneous or unclear phrases. Additionally, ensuring that each sentence contributes directly to the overall argument or description will help keep the writing on topic. It may also be beneficial to outline the main points before writing to ensure a logical progression of ideas.

Overall, to achieve a higher band score, the essay needs to be more comprehensive, coherent, and focused, addressing all parts of the prompt with clarity and supporting details.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 8

Organize Information Logically:
- Detailed explanation: The essay presents information in a logical sequence, beginning with an overview of the solar panel’s structure and then detailing its function. The introduction effectively sets the stage for the subsequent explanations, and the progression from the description of the panel’s components to the energy generation process is clear. For instance, the transition from discussing the physical structure to the operational mechanism is smooth, allowing readers to follow the narrative without confusion.
- How to improve: To enhance logical flow, consider using clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph that explicitly state the main idea. This would help guide the reader through the essay’s structure. Additionally, incorporating transitional phrases between major points could further improve the flow. For example, phrases like "In addition to the structure, the energy generation process is equally important" could clarify the relationship between the two main ideas.
Use Paragraphs:
- Detailed explanation: The essay effectively utilizes paragraphs to separate different aspects of the solar panel’s description. Each paragraph focuses on a specific element: the first on the structure and the second on the energy generation process. This separation aids in comprehension and maintains the reader’s focus on one idea at a time. However, the paragraphs could be more distinct in their thematic focus.
- How to improve: To improve paragraphing, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that all sentences within the paragraph support this idea. Consider adding a concluding sentence to each paragraph to summarize the main point before transitioning to the next idea. This would reinforce the coherence of each section and help the reader understand how each part contributes to the overall discussion.
Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good use of cohesive devices, such as "initially," "firstly," and "similarly," which help to connect ideas and indicate the sequence of information. These devices contribute to the overall coherence of the essay by linking sentences and paragraphs effectively. However, the range of cohesive devices used is somewhat limited, which could affect the overall fluidity of the writing.
- How to improve: To diversify the use of cohesive devices, consider incorporating a wider variety of linking words and phrases. For example, using "Furthermore," "Moreover," or "In contrast" can help to create more nuanced connections between ideas. Additionally, employing pronouns and synonyms can reduce repetition and enhance cohesion. For instance, instead of repeatedly using "the solar panel," you could refer to it as "the system" or "this technology" in subsequent mentions to maintain engagement and fluidity.

By addressing these areas for improvement, the essay could achieve an even higher level of coherence and cohesion, potentially reaching a band score of 9.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 6

Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary related to the topic of solar panels, such as "design," "mechanism," "solar radiation," "transparent glass," and "energy generation." However, the vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive, particularly in phrases like "solar radiation" and "heats either air or water." The use of terms like "uncomplicated" and "efficient" is appropriate, but the overall lexical variety could be enhanced to elevate the score.
- How to improve: To improve, consider incorporating synonyms and more varied expressions. For example, instead of repeatedly using "heats," you could use "warms," "raises the temperature of," or "thermally energizes." Additionally, introducing more technical vocabulary related to solar technology, such as "photovoltaic cells," "thermal energy," or "insulation," could enhance the richness of the essay.
Use Vocabulary Precisely:
- Detailed explanation: The essay generally uses vocabulary accurately, but there are instances where precision is lacking. For example, the phrase "caban quat khai thác bản ( plạp)" appears to be an error or a mix of languages that detracts from clarity. Additionally, the term "e ewable energy" contains a typographical error that obscures meaning. The phrase "facilitated by inlets and outlets" is correctly used, but the overall clarity could be improved with more precise language.
- How to improve: Focus on ensuring that all vocabulary is relevant and correctly used. Avoid including non-English phrases unless they are clearly defined or necessary for the context. Proofreading for typographical errors and ensuring that all terms are used correctly will enhance precision. For example, instead of "facilitated by inlets and outlets," you might say "utilizing inlets and outlets for optimal airflow."
Use Correct Spelling:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several spelling errors, such as "e ewable" instead of "renewable" and "caban quat khai thác bản ( plạp)," which appears to be a non-English phrase or a typographical error. These mistakes can distract the reader and impact the overall impression of the writing.
- How to improve: To improve spelling accuracy, practice writing and proofreading techniques. Consider using spell-check tools or applications that can help identify and correct errors before finalizing the essay. Additionally, regularly reviewing commonly misspelled words and practicing their correct forms can enhance spelling skills. For instance, ensure that "renewable" is spelled correctly throughout the essay.

By addressing these areas, the essay can achieve a higher band score in Lexical Resource, demonstrating a broader range of vocabulary, greater precision in word choice, and improved spelling accuracy.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 5

Use a Wide Range of Structures:
- Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a basic range of sentence structures, primarily using simple and compound sentences. For example, the sentence "The diagrams illustrate the design of a basic solar panel and its mechanism for generating energy" is a compound sentence that effectively conveys the main idea. However, there is a noticeable lack of complex sentences, which limits the overall grammatical range. Additionally, some sentences are overly simplistic, such as "This basic structure allows for the efficient harnessing of solar energy," which could be expanded for greater depth.
- How to improve: To enhance the variety of sentence structures, the writer should incorporate more complex sentences that include subordinate clauses. For instance, instead of saying "This radiation heats either air or water," the writer could say, "As the radiation heats either air or water, the efficiency of the solar panel is significantly increased." Practicing the use of relative clauses and conditional sentences can also help diversify the writing style.
Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:
- Detailed explanation: The essay contains several grammatical errors and issues with punctuation that detract from its clarity and professionalism. For example, the phrase "caban quat khai thác bản ( plạp)" appears to be a typographical error or an incomplete thought, which disrupts the flow of the essay. Additionally, there are instances of incorrect capitalization, such as "e ewable energy," which should be corrected to "renewable energy." The use of commas is also inconsistent, particularly in longer sentences where they could aid in clarity.
- How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should carefully proofread the essay to identify and correct typographical errors and ensure that all terms are spelled correctly. Additionally, focusing on punctuation rules, such as comma placement in complex sentences, can enhance clarity. It may be beneficial to practice writing sentences with varying lengths and structures, paying attention to how punctuation can aid in the readability of those sentences. Utilizing grammar-checking tools or seeking feedback from peers can also help identify areas needing improvement.

In summary, while the essay meets some basic requirements for grammatical range and accuracy, there is significant room for improvement. By diversifying sentence structures and enhancing grammatical and punctuation accuracy, the writer can work towards achieving a higher band score.

Bài sửa mẫu

The diagrams illustrate the design of a basic solar panel and its mechanism for generating energy.

Overall, the panel’s structure, consisting of a limited number of components, is straightforward and effectively utilizes solar radiation to heat either air or water.

Initially, the solar panel’s design is uncomplicated, featuring a rectangular enclosure with a transparent glass surface that captures solar radiation. This radiation heats either air or water flowing through the system, facilitated by inlets and outlets located on either side of the panel. This basic structure allows for the efficient harnessing of solar energy, making it a fundamental component in the generation of renewable energy.