The diagram shows the main systems of writing used throughout the world. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features.

The diagram illustrates the major systems of writing used around the world and how their relation in character through the four main branches include Logographic, Abjad, Abjuda, Alphabetic, Syllabic.
Looked at from the first writing system which is referred as Logographic, and one single character is considered as one word. There is also an essential importance for this systems is that the writing form can be used by other languages which is different in spoken system. For instance the Chinese alphabets structure is one of the Logographic system and has the identical system in writing compares to Japanese.
In the second branch- Abjad, is widely known for the Arabic language. It comprises one character as one consonant and the initial sound is significantly based on the writing technique,
The third branch of the writing systems contains Indian which is representative of the Abjuda system. The grammatical structure indicates one character that equals to one consonant and one vowel.
The fourth writing system is Alphabetic which is commonly regarded as a dominant classification of language such as English. However the pronunciation and spelling grammar are not always comply with any consistent rules, and might led to confusion for foreigner.
The Syllabic writing system includes Japanese and Kana has one character which is considered as a single syllable.
In summary, the system of classification of alphabetic structure discriminates four groups between Logographic, Abjad, Abjuda, Alphabetic, and Syllabic. Whereas there are significant difference in each grammatical structure and spoken forms, the Logographic and Syllabic have some similarity and connection.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"The diagram illustrates the major systems of writing used around the world and how their relation in character through the four main branches include Logographic, Abjad, Abjuda, Alphabetic, Syllabic." -> "The diagram illustrates the primary writing systems employed globally and their relationships among the five main categories: Logographic, Abjad, Abjuda, Alphabetic, and Syllabic."
Explanation: "Major systems of writing" is vague and could be more specific with "primary writing systems." The phrase "how their relation in character" is unclear and awkward; "relationships among" is clearer and more formal. Also, "include" is replaced with "among" to correctly indicate the categories.
"Looked at from the first writing system which is referred as Logographic," -> "The first writing system, referred to as Logographic,"
Explanation: "Looked at from" is informal and unclear; "The first writing system, referred to as" is more direct and formal.
"There is also an essential importance for this systems" -> "This system also holds significant importance"
Explanation: "There is also an essential importance for this systems" is grammatically incorrect and awkward. "This system also holds significant importance" corrects the grammar and enhances clarity.
"the writing form can be used by other languages which is different in spoken system" -> "the writing form can be used by languages that differ from the spoken system"
Explanation: "which is different in spoken system" is awkward and unclear. "that differ from the spoken system" is more precise and grammatically correct.
"the Chinese alphabets structure is one of the Logographic system" -> "the Chinese writing system is a Logographic system"
Explanation: "alphabets structure" is incorrect; "writing system" is the correct term. Also, "one of the Logographic system" should be "a Logographic system" for grammatical correctness.
"has the identical system in writing compares to Japanese" -> "has an identical writing system compared to Japanese"
Explanation: "comprises" is incorrect in this context; "compared to" is the correct comparative structure.
"The third branch of the writing systems contains Indian which is representative of the Abjuda system." -> "The third branch of the writing systems is represented by the Abjuda system, primarily used in Indian languages."
Explanation: "contains Indian" is unclear and incorrect; "is represented by the Abjuda system, primarily used in Indian languages" clarifies the relationship and provides context.
"The grammatical structure indicates one character that equals to one consonant and one vowel." -> "The grammatical structure represents one character equivalent to one consonant and one vowel."
Explanation: "indicates" is less formal; "represents" is more suitable for academic writing. "equals to" should be "equivalent to" for grammatical correctness.
"The fourth writing system is Alphabetic which is commonly regarded as a dominant classification of language such as English." -> "The fourth writing system, Alphabetic, is commonly regarded as a dominant classification, exemplified by English."
Explanation: "such as" is too informal for academic writing; "exemplified by" is more precise and formal.
"However the pronunciation and spelling grammar are not always comply with any consistent rules, and might led to confusion for foreigner." -> "However, the pronunciation and spelling rules are not always consistent, potentially leading to confusion for non-native speakers."
Explanation: "comply with" should be "comply with any consistent rules" for grammatical correctness; "might led" should be "might lead" for subject-verb agreement; "for foreigner" should be "for non-native speakers" for clarity and formality.
"The Syllabic writing system includes Japanese and Kana has one character which is considered as a single syllable." -> "The Syllabic writing system includes Japanese and Kana, where each character represents a single syllable."
Explanation: "includes Japanese and Kana has one character" is awkward and unclear; "includes Japanese and Kana, where each character represents a single syllable" clarifies and corrects the structure.
"In summary, the system of classification of alphabetic structure discriminates four groups between Logographic, Abjad, Abjuda, Alphabetic, and Syllabic." -> "In summary, the classification system categorizes writing systems into five groups: Logographic, Abjad, Abjuda, Alphabetic, and Syllabic."
Explanation: "discriminates" is incorrect in this context; "categorizes" is the correct term for classification. Also, "four groups between" should be "five groups," correcting the count.

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5

Explanation: The essay generally addresses the task, but the format is inappropriate in places. The essay does not provide a clear overview of the main features of the writing systems. Instead, it recounts details mechanically, with no clear overview. The essay also presents, but inadequately covers, key features/bullet points. There is a tendency to focus on details.

How to improve: The essay could be improved by providing a clearer overview of the main features of the writing systems. The essay should also focus on the key features of each system, rather than just listing details. The essay could also be improved by using more appropriate language and grammar. For example, the essay uses the phrase "comply with any consistent rules" which is not a natural way to express this idea. The essay could also be improved by using more specific examples. For example, instead of saying "The Syllabic writing system includes Japanese and Kana," the essay could say "The Syllabic writing system includes Japanese, which uses the Kana script."

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5.0

Explanation: The essay presents information on various writing systems, but it lacks clear overall progression and organization. While it attempts to categorize the systems, the transitions between ideas are often abrupt, leading to confusion. The use of cohesive devices is inadequate and at times inaccurate, which detracts from the clarity of the writing. Additionally, the paragraphing is inconsistent; some sections could benefit from clearer separation of ideas. Overall, the essay demonstrates some understanding of the topic but fails to present the information in a coherent and logically structured manner.

How to improve: To improve the coherence and cohesion of the essay, the writer should focus on organizing ideas more logically, ensuring that each paragraph has a clear central topic. Using a wider range of cohesive devices appropriately will help to enhance the flow of information. Additionally, the writer should work on creating smoother transitions between ideas and ensuring that paragraphing is used effectively to separate distinct points. Finally, proofreading for grammatical accuracy and clarity will strengthen the overall presentation of the essay.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary relevant to the task. It attempts to use less common vocabulary, such as "Logographic," "Abjad," and "Syllabic," which shows some awareness of the topic’s complexity. However, there are inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as "the essential importance for this systems" (should be "this system") and "the identical system in writing compares to Japanese" (should be "compared to"). Additionally, there are some spelling and grammatical errors that do not severely impede communication but do affect clarity.

How to improve: To enhance the lexical resource score, the writer should focus on using a wider range of vocabulary with greater precision and fewer errors. This can be achieved by practicing with synonyms and ensuring that word choices are appropriate for the context. Additionally, attention to spelling and grammatical accuracy will help improve overall clarity and coherence. Expanding the use of less common lexical items and ensuring correct collocation will also contribute positively to the score.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 5

Band Score: 5.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates a limited range of grammatical structures, primarily using simple sentences with some attempts at complex structures. While there are some accurate sentences, frequent grammatical errors and awkward phrasing hinder clarity and coherence. For example, phrases like "the essential importance for this systems" and "the identical system in writing compares to Japanese" contain grammatical inaccuracies that could confuse the reader. Additionally, punctuation errors are present, which further detracts from the overall quality of the writing.

How to improve: To enhance the grammatical range and accuracy, the writer should focus on the following areas:

Variety of Sentence Structures: Incorporate a wider range of complex sentences to demonstrate control over more advanced grammatical forms.
Error Correction: Pay attention to subject-verb agreement and article usage to reduce grammatical errors. For instance, "this systems" should be corrected to "this system."
Punctuation: Review punctuation rules to ensure clarity and proper sentence separation, which will help improve overall readability.
Clarity and Cohesion: Work on phrasing to ensure that ideas are expressed clearly and logically, avoiding awkward constructions that may confuse the reader.

Bài sửa mẫu

The diagram illustrates the major systems of writing used around the world and their relationships in character through four main branches: Logographic, Abjad, Abjuda, Alphabetic, and Syllabic.

The first writing system, referred to as Logographic, represents one word with a single character. An essential aspect of this system is that the writing form can be utilized by other languages that differ in their spoken systems. For instance, the structure of Chinese characters is a prime example of a Logographic system, which shares similarities in writing with Japanese.

The second branch, Abjad, is widely known for the Arabic language. In this system, one character corresponds to one consonant, and the initial sound is significantly based on the writing technique.

The third branch of writing systems, Abjuda, is represented by Indian scripts. The grammatical structure indicates that one character equals one consonant and one vowel.

The fourth writing system is Alphabetic, which is commonly regarded as a dominant classification of languages such as English. However, the pronunciation and spelling rules are not always consistent, which may lead to confusion for foreigners.

The Syllabic writing system, which includes Japanese Kana, consists of characters that are considered as single syllables.

In summary, the classification of writing systems distinguishes four groups: Logographic, Abjad, Abjuda, Alphabetic, and Syllabic. While there are significant differences in each grammatical structure and spoken form, Logographic and Syllabic systems exhibit some similarities and connections.