The following map details a town now and a proposed future layout. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The following map details a town now and a proposed future layout. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The diagram depicts the proposed changes to the design of an area.
Overall, there will be some modifications and improvements to the existing amenities. It is also notable that the area’s accessibility will be enhanced.
Regarding the west side of the area, the air field which is currently linked to A2 road will be replaced by an industrial estate. An additional road is expected to be built to provide faster access from this area to the railway line. Another principal change is the construction of A4 road which directly connects the A2 road to the town center.
As for the east side, there will be an erection of a new large roundabout in the midway of the railway line that connects the east and the west side. The facilities on this part of the area will remain unchanged. However, a highway extending beyond the town center will be installed to improve further access to the area.
Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng
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"modifications and improvements" -> "refinements and enhancements"
Explanation: Replacing "modifications and improvements" with "refinements and enhancements" adds sophistication to the language by using more precise and nuanced terms, indicating a more deliberate and strategic approach to the changes being made. -
"notable" -> "significant"
Explanation: Substituting "notable" with "significant" conveys a stronger sense of importance and impact, elevating the description of the area’s enhanced accessibility to a more authoritative tone. -
"air field" -> "airstrip" or "aviation facility"
Explanation: Using "airstrip" or "aviation facility" instead of "air field" provides more specific and refined terminology, offering a clearer understanding of the infrastructure being discussed in the context of the proposed changes. -
"erection of a new large roundabout" -> "construction of a sizable roundabout"
Explanation: Replacing "erection of a new large roundabout" with "construction of a sizable roundabout" maintains clarity while using more sophisticated language, avoiding potentially ambiguous or colloquial terms like "erection" and providing a clearer description of the planned infrastructure development. -
"facilities" -> "amenities" or "features"
Explanation: Substituting "facilities" with "amenities" or "features" enhances the specificity and clarity of the description, particularly when referring to the elements of the area being discussed, such as recreational areas, green spaces, or commercial establishments. -
"installed" -> "implemented" or "established"
Explanation: Replacing "installed" with "implemented" or "established" lends a more formal and precise tone to the description of the highway extension, emphasizing the deliberate planning and execution involved in its construction and integration into the area’s infrastructure.
Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 7
Band Score: 7.0
Explanation: The essay adequately covers the requirements of the task by providing a clear overview of the main changes proposed for the town layout. It highlights key features such as the replacement of the air field with an industrial estate, the construction of new roads for better accessibility, and the erection of a large roundabout. However, some points could be more fully extended to provide a more detailed explanation of the proposed changes.
How to improve: To enhance the essay, consider expanding on the significance of each proposed change and its potential impact on the town’s infrastructure and accessibility. Providing more specific details about the size and scope of the industrial estate, the layout of the new roads, and the expected benefits of the highway extension would strengthen the response and justify a higher band score.
Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7
Band Score: 7
Explanation:
The essay logically organizes information and ideas, maintaining a clear progression throughout. Each paragraph introduces a distinct aspect of the proposed changes, starting with the west side and then moving to the east side. There’s a clear central topic within each paragraph, focusing on the modifications and improvements to existing amenities, and the enhancements in accessibility. The use of cohesive devices is appropriate, aiding in the flow of ideas. For example, phrases like "Regarding the west side," and "As for the east side," help to transition between different parts of the area’s proposed changes.
How to improve:
To enhance coherence and cohesion further, ensure that cohesive devices are used consistently throughout the essay. Additionally, consider incorporating more explicit transitions between paragraphs to strengthen the overall structure and coherence of the essay.
Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7
Band Score: 7
Explanation:
The essay demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary, allowing for flexibility and precision in conveying ideas. The writer employs various lexical items effectively to describe the proposed changes to the area’s design. There is awareness of style and collocation, with the use of terms such as "amenities," "accessibility," "industrial estate," and "erection of a new large roundabout." While there are occasional errors in word choice and collocation, they do not significantly impede understanding.
How to improve:
To enhance lexical resource further, strive for more diverse and sophisticated vocabulary choices where appropriate. Pay close attention to word choice and collocation to minimize occasional inaccuracies. Additionally, aim for greater precision in conveying meanings by using more specific terminology where possible.
Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7
Band Score: 7.0
Explanation:
The essay demonstrates a good level of grammatical range and accuracy. It utilizes a variety of sentence structures, including simple and complex forms, such as compound sentences and subordinate clauses. The writer effectively conveys the main features of the map and makes comparisons where relevant. There are few errors in grammar and punctuation, and most sentences are error-free, contributing to clear communication of ideas.
How to improve:
To further enhance the grammatical range and accuracy, the writer can focus on incorporating more complex sentence structures and varied sentence beginnings. Additionally, paying attention to minor errors, such as article usage and verb tense consistency, can help elevate the writing to a higher band score.
Bài sửa mẫu
The provided diagram illustrates proposed alterations to the layout of a specific area.
In general, the existing amenities are slated for modification and enhancement, alongside an improvement in the area’s accessibility.
On the western side, the current airfield, linked to the A2 road, will be replaced by an industrial estate. Additionally, a new road is set to be constructed to facilitate swifter access from this vicinity to the railway line. Another significant change involves the creation of the A4 road, directly connecting the A2 road to the town center.
Turning to the eastern side, a notable addition will be the installation of a large roundabout midway along the railway line, facilitating connection between the eastern and western areas. Facilities in this sector will remain unchanged. However, a highway extending beyond the town center is planned to be established, further improving access to the area.
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