The graph below shows predictions about the number of people who will study three major world languages between 2020 and 2030. summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows predictions about the number of people who will study three major world languages between 2020 and 2030.

summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph illustrates predictions about how many students will study English, Spanish and Mandarin over a 10-year period, from 2020 to 2030.
Overall, what stands out from the graph is that upward trends are predicted for all of them. Moreover, English has the greatest number of learners, regardless of the year of the period.
Looking at details, as regards English, there were a considerable increase from around 550 learners in 2020 to around 700 in 2024. Start from this year, it is forecast that the number of students learning English will experience a slightly dip in next two years but will recover in 2028, then reach over 700 millions of students in 2030.
Mandarin and Spanish learners shares the same pattern, in which they both have a steady growth without any fluctuation. Mandarin started with around 100 millions of students, nearly a half the Spanish ones. In 2026, the number of students studying Mandarin is predicted to catch up with Spanish, and it is likely to overtaken students of Spanish until the end of the period.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

"what stands out from the graph is" -> "the graph reveals"
Explanation: "The graph reveals" is a more concise and formal way to introduce the observation, enhancing the academic tone of the sentence.
"upward trends are predicted for all of them" -> "all three languages are expected to exhibit upward trends"
Explanation: The phrase "all three languages are expected to exhibit upward trends" is more precise and formal, clearly specifying the subject and action.
"regardless of the year of the period" -> "across the entire period"
Explanation: "Across the entire period" is more specific and academically appropriate, avoiding the awkward and unclear "year of the period."
"there were a considerable increase" -> "there was a significant increase"
Explanation: "There was a significant increase" corrects the grammatical error and uses a more precise adjective ("significant" instead of "considerable").
"Start from this year" -> "Starting from this year"
Explanation: "Starting from" is the correct form for indicating the beginning of an action or period in formal writing.
"it is forecast that the number of students learning English will experience a slightly dip" -> "it is forecast that the number of English learners will experience a slight dip"
Explanation: "The number of English learners" is more precise than "the number of students learning English," and "a slight dip" corrects the grammatical error.
"will recover in 2028, then reach over 700 millions of students" -> "will recover in 2028 and reach over 700 million students"
Explanation: "And" is the correct conjunction for connecting clauses, and "million" should not be pluralized as it refers to a single quantity.
"Mandarin and Spanish learners shares the same pattern" -> "Mandarin and Spanish learners share the same pattern"
Explanation: "Share" is the correct verb form for the plural subject "learners."
"without any fluctuation" -> "without fluctuation"
Explanation: "Without fluctuation" is grammatically correct and maintains the formal tone.
"it is likely to overtaken students of Spanish" -> "it is likely to surpass the number of Spanish learners"
Explanation: "Surpass the number of Spanish learners" corrects the verb and noun agreement, improving clarity and formality.

These changes enhance the precision, formality, and readability of the essay, aligning it more closely with academic writing standards.

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6

Explanation: The essay provides a general overview of the main trends in the graph, but it lacks some detail and accuracy. The essay mentions that English has the greatest number of learners, which is correct, but it does not provide specific figures to support this claim. The essay also mentions that Mandarin and Spanish learners share the same pattern, which is not entirely accurate. While both languages show a steady growth, Mandarin starts with a significantly lower number of learners than Spanish. The essay also mentions that Mandarin is predicted to overtake Spanish by the end of the period, but it does not provide specific figures to support this claim.

How to improve: The essay could be improved by providing more specific figures to support the claims made. For example, the essay could state that English is predicted to have over 700 million learners in 2030, while Mandarin is predicted to have around 400 million learners. The essay could also provide more detail about the specific patterns of growth for each language. For example, the essay could mention that English is predicted to experience a slight dip in the number of learners between 2024 and 2026, but will recover in 2028. The essay could also provide more accurate information about the relationship between Mandarin and Spanish learners. For example, the essay could state that Mandarin is predicted to catch up with Spanish in 2026, but will not overtake Spanish until 2028.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates a coherent arrangement of information and ideas, with a clear overall progression. The introduction provides a general overview of the data, and the details are logically sequenced. However, there are instances where cohesion within and between sentences is somewhat mechanical, and the use of cohesive devices could be improved. For instance, phrases like "as regards" and "looking at details" are somewhat formulaic and do not enhance the flow of the essay. Additionally, there are minor issues with referencing, such as "the number of students learning English will experience a slightly dip," where "slightly" should be "slight." The paragraphing is present but not always logical, particularly in the transition between discussing English and the comparison with Mandarin and Spanish.

How to improve: To enhance coherence and cohesion, the writer should focus on varying their use of cohesive devices to avoid mechanical repetition. They could also work on ensuring that transitions between ideas are smoother and more natural. Improving the clarity of referencing and ensuring that all sentences contribute to a clear progression of ideas will also help. Lastly, organizing the information into more distinct paragraphs that each focus on a specific aspect of the data could improve the overall structure of the essay.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task. It attempts to use less common vocabulary, such as "upward trends," "considerable increase," and "steady growth," but there are inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as "experience a slightly dip" (should be "experience a slight dip") and "overtaken students of Spanish" (should be "overtake the number of students studying Spanish"). There are also some errors in spelling and word formation, such as "millions" being incorrectly written as "millions" in one instance. However, these errors do not significantly impede communication, which is characteristic of a Band 6 performance.

How to improve: To achieve a higher band score, the writer should focus on expanding their vocabulary range and ensuring precise word choice. Additionally, paying attention to collocations and common phrases would enhance fluency. Reducing spelling and grammatical errors will also contribute to a more polished essay. Practicing with varied vocabulary and seeking feedback on word usage can further improve lexical resource.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, which is characteristic of a Band 6. While the writer attempts to convey the main features of the graph, there are several grammatical errors and awkward phrasings that occasionally hinder clarity. For example, phrases like "considerable increase" should be "considerable increase" and "slightly dip" should be "slight dip." Additionally, the use of "millions" in "700 millions" is incorrect; it should be "700 million." These errors, while not severely obstructing communication, do detract from the overall effectiveness of the writing.

How to improve: To achieve a higher band score, the writer should focus on enhancing grammatical accuracy and refining sentence structure. This can be done by practicing complex sentences and ensuring that subject-verb agreement and pluralization are correct. Additionally, proofreading for common grammatical errors and improving punctuation will help in producing more error-free sentences. Expanding the range of vocabulary and using more varied sentence structures could also contribute to a higher score in Grammatical Range and Accuracy.

Bài sửa mẫu

The line graph illustrates predictions regarding the number of students who will study English, Spanish, and Mandarin over a 10-year period, from 2020 to 2030. Overall, what stands out from the graph is that upward trends are anticipated for all three languages. Moreover, English is projected to have the highest number of learners throughout the entire period.

Looking at the details, concerning English, there was a considerable increase from around 550 million learners in 2020 to approximately 700 million in 2024. Starting from this year, it is forecast that the number of students learning English will experience a slight dip over the next two years but will recover in 2028, ultimately reaching over 700 million students by 2030.

Mandarin and Spanish learners share a similar pattern, exhibiting steady growth without any fluctuations. Mandarin began with around 100 million students, nearly half the number of Spanish learners. By 2026, the number of students studying Mandarin is predicted to catch up with that of Spanish, and it is likely to overtake Spanish learners by the end of the period.