The graph below shows the production levels of the main kinds of fuel in the UK between 1981 and 2000. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

Overall, the production level of petroleum had the highest percentage of energy units. By contrast, natural gas and coal fluctuated throughout the period.
At the beginning of the period, petroleum production was the highest fuel that was produced with approximately 90 units. It increased to 140 units in 1986 and fell sharply to 100 units in 1991. Throughout the remainder of the period, this fuel production gradually uplifted to 140 units in 2000.
Conversely, coal production had the lowest proportion with 40 units in 1981 and remained above that for the next 10 years. In 1991, the coal's production level increased gradually and reached a peak at 100 units in 2000. Natural gas production had 80 units in 1981 and decreased sharply to 40 units about 1984. Then it rose to 60 units in 1986 and gradually declined to approximately 40 units at the end of the period.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

Errors and Improvements:

"production level" -> "production volume"
Explanation: "Volume" is a more precise term when discussing the quantity of a substance produced, particularly in the context of energy production.
"fluctuated" -> "varied"
Explanation: "Varied" maintains the idea of change but offers a more precise and formal term than "fluctuated."
"fuel that was produced" -> "fuel produced"
Explanation: Removing "that was" streamlines the sentence without altering its meaning, making it more concise.
"uplifted" -> "increased"
Explanation: "Increased" is a simpler and clearer term for indicating a rise in production.
"proportion" -> "share"
Explanation: "Share" is more commonly used in the context of quantities, particularly when discussing portions of a whole.
"gradually and reached a peak" -> "steadily increased, peaking"
Explanation: This revision offers a more dynamic and concise description of the production trend.
"decreased sharply" -> "plummeted"
Explanation: "Plummeted" conveys a sudden and significant drop, providing a stronger emphasis than "decreased sharply."
"about" -> "around"
Explanation: "Around" is a more precise term when referring to an approximate time or value.

Band điểm Task Achivement ước lượng: 7

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Band Score: 7.0
Explanation:
The essay adequately covers the requirements of the task by summarizing the main features of the graph, including the trends in production levels of petroleum, coal, and natural gas between 1981 and 2000. The main trends and comparisons are clearly presented, with a focus on key features such as changes in production levels over time.
How to improve:
To improve further and potentially reach a higher band score, consider providing more detailed comparisons between the fuels or expanding on the implications of the trends observed. Additionally, ensure that the language used is precise and accurate throughout the essay.
]

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation:
The essay arranges information and ideas coherently, presenting a clear overall progression. Each paragraph focuses on a different type of fuel, providing a structured overview of their production levels over time. The essay effectively uses cohesive devices to connect sentences within each paragraph, although there are some instances of mechanical cohesion. For instance, phrases like "At the beginning of the period" and "Throughout the remainder of the period" help maintain coherence. However, there is room for improvement in using more varied cohesive devices to enhance coherence further. Paragraphing is utilized, but it could be improved for better logical flow between paragraphs.

How to improve:
To improve coherence and cohesion, consider using a wider range of cohesive devices beyond temporal markers. Incorporating more transitional phrases and logical connectors can enhance the flow between sentences and paragraphs. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph maintains a clear focus on the central topic and that the organization of ideas within paragraphs follows a logical progression.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 6

Band Score: 6.0

Explanation: The essay demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, with varied word choices such as "petroleum," "fluctuated," "proportion," and "uplifted." There is an attempt to use less common vocabulary, although with some inaccuracy, as seen in phrases like "the highest proportion" and "gradually uplifted." However, there are instances of repetitive vocabulary use, such as "production level," and some inaccuracies in word choice, like "fuel production gradually uplifted." Additionally, the essay could benefit from more varied sentence structures to enhance lexical richness.

How to improve: To improve the lexical resource, aim for more varied vocabulary choices, avoiding repetition where possible. Use less common lexical items accurately and consistently. Experiment with different sentence structures to showcase a wider range of language proficiency. Proofread carefully to ensure accuracy in word choice and usage.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 7

Band Score: 7.0

Explanation:
The essay demonstrates a variety of complex structures such as subordinate clauses and varied sentence beginnings. The majority of the sentences are error-free, showcasing good control of grammar and punctuation. However, there are a few minor errors and inconsistencies present, such as "petroleum had the highest percentage of energy units" which could be more accurately phrased as "petroleum had the highest production level of energy units" for clarity and precision. Additionally, there are occasional errors in verb tense consistency, like "Conversely, coal production had the lowest proportion with 40 units in 1981 and remained above that for the next 10 years," where the past perfect tense "had" is used instead of the past simple tense "had" before "remained". Overall, these errors do not significantly impede communication but detract from the overall accuracy of the essay.

How to improve:
To improve, focus on maintaining consistency in verb tenses throughout the essay. Additionally, aim for greater precision in phrasing to ensure clarity and accuracy. Proofreading the essay carefully for minor errors and inconsistencies before submission can help achieve a higher band score.

Bài sửa mẫu

The provided graph illustrates the production levels of major fuel types in the UK over the span of two decades, from 1981 to 2000.

Petroleum emerged as the dominant fuel in terms of production, consistently maintaining the highest percentage of energy units throughout the period. Starting at approximately 90 units in 1981, petroleum production surged to 140 units by 1986, only to experience a sharp decline to 100 units in 1991. However, it gradually rebounded, reaching 140 units by the end of the period.

In contrast, coal production exhibited a comparatively lower proportion, beginning at 40 units in 1981 and remaining relatively stable for the subsequent decade. Subsequently, there was a gradual increase in coal production, reaching a peak of 100 units by 2000.

Natural gas production followed a fluctuating pattern, starting at 80 units in 1981 and experiencing a sharp decline to 40 units around 1984. However, it then saw an increase to 60 units by 1986, followed by a gradual decline, stabilizing at approximately 40 units by the end of the period.