“The human mind will always be superior to machines because machines are only tools of human minds.” Present your perspective on this issue, using relevant reasons and examples to support your views.

"The human mind will always be superior to machines because machines are only tools of human minds."

Present your perspective on this issue, using relevant reasons and examples to support your views.

The emergence of technological advancements, particularly artificial intelligence (AI), has catalyzed discourse over the role of humanity in society, with individuals positing that the intellect of humans will always be unrivaled compared with that of AI since AI are only humanity’s products. This essay will critically scrutinize this viewpoint and argue for why I strongly endorse it.

Granted, the superiority of the human mind lies in its creativity and emotional intelligence, traits that machines, despite their advancements, cannot replicate. First and foremost, the ingenuity of humans can foster more open solutions for intricate matters. To elaborate, in contrast with AI that can be stereotypical and limited due to available commands for autonomous use, humans’ competitive advantage is the creativity therein lies transferable thinking for essential situations, incentivizing more objective views and effective problem-solving skills. For instance, in the realm of mediation or military action, leaders always seek to find various solutions, nurturing more objective viewpoints towards contradictory opinions, potentially resulting in efficient negotiation. Additionally, emotional quotient (EQ) is of great benefit in terms of conversational environments. In particular, communication plays a crucial role in establishing networking, imparting emotions, negotiation.

Meanwhile, useful communication would necessitate collective and empathetic endeavors to convey initiatives, resolve conflicts considering diverse viewpoints, leading to enhanced mutual appreciation, sympathy and camaraderie. Such a sympathetic situation can be a catalyst for more effective collaboration and conversations, nurturing helpful ideas for problem solutions.

However, some individuals may contend that the role of humans in society tends to be overshadowed by AI. This opinion is partially true given that AI is bespeaking its prowess in the workforces, with the ability to analyze available data, accuracy and a sense of automation, optimizing convenience with the aid of facial recognition, self-driving cars or medical imaging. Nonetheless, the expression and communication capacities of humans would be a competitive edge over technological inventions. To exemplify, in the realms of politics, mediation, or education, the ability to communicate effectively, think critically, express emotional feelings would rival. Furthermore, machines are programmed with algorithms and commands for autonomous use, which is a limitation towards providing original ideas, emphasizing the superiority of humans to AI, with a growth mindset towards generating fresh initiatives.

To encapsulate, the role of humanity in society is unparalleled since the creativity and emotional intellect of humanity is indubitable. Furthermore, notwithstanding the benefits yielded by AI in the modern workforces, the use of AI certainly cannot rival humans' intelligence given a lack of communication and expression skills alongside the excessively prohibitive cost of adopting AI. Thus, it is imperative that the future generations make the most efficacious use of machines to augment the human intelligence, meanwhile, preserving the irreplaceable qualities of humanity.

Gợi ý nâng cấp từ vựng

1. "catalyzed discourse" -> "stimulated debate"
   Explanation: "Stimulated debate" is a more precise and academically appropriate term than "catalyzed discourse," which can sound overly formal and less specific in this context.

2. "AI are" -> "AI is"
   Explanation: "AI" is a singular noun and should be treated as such in this context, correcting the grammatical error.

3. "I strongly endorse it" -> "I strongly support this viewpoint"
   Explanation: "I strongly support this viewpoint" is more formal and appropriate for academic writing, avoiding the informal tone of "endorse."

4. "the ingenuity of humans can foster more open solutions" -> "human ingenuity can foster more innovative solutions"
   Explanation: "Human ingenuity" is a more concise and formal way to refer to the creative abilities of humans, and "innovative" is more precise than "open" in this context.

5. "transferable thinking for essential situations" -> "transferable thinking in critical situations"
   Explanation: "Critical" is more specific and academically appropriate than "essential" in this context, emphasizing the importance of the situations.

6. "nurturing more objective viewpoints" -> "promoting more objective viewpoints"
   Explanation: "Promoting" is a more precise verb than "nurturing" in this context, suggesting a more direct influence on the development of viewpoints.

7. "useful communication would necessitate" -> "effective communication necessitates"
   Explanation: "Effective" is more specific and academically appropriate than "useful" in this context, and "necessitates" is more direct and formal.

8. "sympathetic situation" -> "sympathetic environment"
   Explanation: "Environment" is a more appropriate term than "situation" in this context, as it refers to the overall context or atmosphere.

9. "AI is bespeaking its prowess" -> "AI demonstrates its prowess"
   Explanation: "Demonstrates" is a more direct and formal verb than "bespeaking," which is not commonly used in this context.

10. "the expression and communication capacities of humans would be a competitive edge" -> "human expression and communication capabilities provide a competitive advantage"
    Explanation: "Capabilities" is more specific and formal than "capacities," and "provide a competitive advantage" is a more precise and formal expression.

11. "think critically, express emotional feelings" -> "think critically and express emotional sentiments"
    Explanation: "Sentiments" is a more formal and precise term than "feelings" in academic writing, and the addition of "and" clarifies the conjunction between the two actions.

12. "machines are programmed with algorithms and commands for autonomous use" -> "machines are programmed with algorithms and commands for autonomous operation"
    Explanation: "Operation" is a more formal and precise term than "use" in this context, fitting better in an academic discussion about machine functionality.

13. "the excessively prohibitive cost of adopting AI" -> "the prohibitively high cost of adopting AI"
    Explanation: "Prohibitively high" is a more precise and formal way to describe the cost, aligning better with academic style.

14. "make the most efficacious use of machines" -> "optimize the use of machines"
    Explanation: "Optimize" is a more precise and formal term than "make the most efficacious use of," which is somewhat redundant and informal.

These changes enhance the precision, formality, and clarity of the essay, aligning it more closely with academic writing standards.

Band điểm Task Response ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Task Response: 8

• Answer All Parts of the Question:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively addresses the prompt by presenting a clear argument that the human mind is superior to machines, specifically artificial intelligence. The author discusses the unique qualities of human creativity and emotional intelligence, which are not replicable by machines. The essay also acknowledges opposing views regarding the capabilities of AI, thus demonstrating an understanding of the complexity of the issue. However, while the essay touches on various aspects of the argument, it could benefit from a more explicit breakdown of how these points directly relate to the superiority of the human mind over machines.
  • How to improve: To enhance the response, the author could explicitly link each point made back to the central thesis throughout the essay. This could involve more clearly delineating how each quality discussed (creativity, emotional intelligence, communication) contributes to the argument of human superiority, perhaps by using subheadings or clearer transitions between points.

• Present a Clear Position Throughout:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay maintains a clear position that supports the superiority of the human mind over machines. The stance is consistently reinforced through examples and counterarguments. However, there are moments where the phrasing becomes convoluted, which could obscure the clarity of the position. For instance, phrases like "bespeaking its prowess" may confuse readers and detract from the overall argument.
  • How to improve: Simplifying language and ensuring that each sentence contributes directly to the argument can enhance clarity. The author could also restate the main position at the beginning of each paragraph to reinforce the essay’s stance and guide the reader through the argument.

• Present, Extend, and Support Ideas:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay presents a variety of ideas, such as the importance of creativity and emotional intelligence, and supports them with relevant examples. However, some points could be further developed. For instance, the discussion on emotional intelligence could benefit from specific examples or scenarios that illustrate its impact in real-world situations, rather than remaining somewhat abstract.
  • How to improve: To strengthen the support for ideas, the author should aim to provide more concrete examples or case studies that illustrate the points made. This could involve discussing specific instances where human creativity has led to significant breakthroughs or where emotional intelligence has played a crucial role in conflict resolution.

• Stay on Topic:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay largely stays on topic, focusing on the superiority of the human mind compared to machines. However, there are instances where the discussion of AI’s capabilities, while relevant, could lead the reader slightly away from the central argument. For example, the mention of AI’s role in the workforce, while important, could be more tightly integrated into the argument about human superiority.
  • How to improve: To maintain focus, the author could ensure that every paragraph ties back to the main argument. This could involve framing discussions about AI within the context of how they highlight human strengths rather than allowing them to stand alone as separate points. Additionally, using topic sentences that clearly relate back to the thesis can help keep the essay focused.

Overall, the essay demonstrates a strong understanding of the topic and presents a well-structured argument. With some refinements in clarity, depth of examples, and focus, it could achieve an even higher score.

Band điểm Coherence & Cohesion ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Coherence and Cohesion: 7

• Organize Information Logically:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a generally logical organization of ideas, with a clear introduction that outlines the writer’s position. Each paragraph addresses a specific aspect of the argument, such as the unique qualities of human creativity and emotional intelligence, and contrasts these with the capabilities of AI. However, the transitions between some ideas could be smoother. For instance, the shift from discussing human creativity to emotional intelligence feels abrupt, and the connection between the two could be more explicitly stated to enhance the logical flow.
  • How to improve: To improve the logical organization, the writer could use clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph that directly relate back to the thesis statement. Additionally, incorporating transitional phrases such as "Furthermore," "In addition," or "Conversely," can help to guide the reader through the argument more seamlessly.

• Use Paragraphs:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay effectively uses paragraphs to separate different ideas, which aids in readability. Each paragraph focuses on a distinct point, such as the advantages of human creativity and emotional intelligence, and the limitations of AI. However, some paragraphs are quite dense and could benefit from being split into smaller sections to enhance clarity. For example, the second paragraph could be divided into two: one focusing on creativity and the other on emotional intelligence.
  • How to improve: The writer should consider breaking longer paragraphs into shorter ones to avoid overwhelming the reader with too much information at once. Each paragraph should ideally contain one main idea, supported by examples and explanations. This will not only improve readability but also strengthen the overall argument by making each point more digestible.

• Use a Range of Cohesive Devices:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay employs some cohesive devices, such as "first and foremost," "meanwhile," and "to exemplify," which help to connect ideas and guide the reader through the argument. However, the range of cohesive devices used is somewhat limited, and there are instances where the connections between sentences could be clearer. For example, the phrase "this opinion is partially true" could be better linked to the preceding sentence to clarify how it relates to the argument about AI’s capabilities.
  • How to improve: To enhance the use of cohesive devices, the writer should aim to incorporate a wider variety of linking words and phrases, such as "on the other hand," "in contrast," and "as a result." Additionally, ensuring that each sentence flows logically into the next will help to create a more cohesive narrative. The writer could practice using these devices in different contexts to become more comfortable with their application.

Overall, while the essay demonstrates a solid understanding of the topic and presents a clear argument, improvements in logical organization, paragraph structure, and the use of cohesive devices will enhance the coherence and cohesion of the writing, potentially raising the band score in this criterion.

Band điểm Lexical Resource ước lượng: 7

Band Score for Lexical Resource: 7

• Use a Wide Range of Vocabulary:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, employing terms such as "technological advancements," "artificial intelligence," "emotional intelligence," and "transferable thinking." This variety helps convey complex ideas effectively. However, there are instances where the vocabulary could be more varied or sophisticated. For example, phrases like "humanity’s products" could be replaced with more nuanced expressions such as "creations of human intellect" to enhance sophistication.
  • How to improve: To improve vocabulary range, the writer should aim to incorporate synonyms and more advanced vocabulary throughout the essay. For instance, instead of repeating "superiority," alternatives like "preeminence" or "dominance" could be used. Additionally, exploring academic or technical terms related to AI and human cognition could enrich the essay further.

• Use Vocabulary Precisely:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay generally uses vocabulary accurately, but there are moments of imprecision. For example, the phrase "bespeaking its prowess" is somewhat awkward and may confuse readers. The term "emotional quotient (EQ)" is correctly used but could be more clearly defined to ensure understanding. Additionally, the phrase "the expression and communication capacities of humans would be a competitive edge over technological inventions" could be more precisely articulated as "the expressive and communicative abilities of humans provide a significant advantage over technological innovations."
  • How to improve: To enhance precision, the writer should focus on clarity and conciseness. Avoiding overly complex phrases and ensuring that terms are clearly defined will help. For example, instead of "nurturing helpful ideas for problem solutions," a more straightforward expression like "fostering effective problem-solving" would be clearer.

• Use Correct Spelling:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay displays a strong command of spelling, with only minor errors present. For instance, "bespeaking" is an uncommon choice that may not be recognized by all readers, but it is spelled correctly. However, the phrase "the excessively prohibitive cost of adopting AI" could be simplified to "the high cost of adopting AI," which would also avoid any potential confusion regarding the term "excessively prohibitive."
  • How to improve: To further enhance spelling accuracy, the writer should proofread the essay carefully to catch any typographical errors or awkward phrasing that could detract from clarity. Utilizing tools like spell checkers or grammar checkers can also help identify less common words that may not be spelled correctly or used appropriately.

In summary, while the essay demonstrates a solid command of lexical resource with a band score of 7, there are areas for improvement. By expanding vocabulary range, enhancing precision in word choice, and maintaining spelling accuracy, the writer can aim for a higher band score in future essays.

Band điểm Grammatical Range & Accuracy ước lượng: 8

Band Score for Grammatical Range and Accuracy: 8

• Use a Wide Range of Structures:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay demonstrates a commendable variety of sentence structures. Complex sentences are effectively used, such as "Granted, the superiority of the human mind lies in its creativity and emotional intelligence, traits that machines, despite their advancements, cannot replicate." This showcases the writer’s ability to convey nuanced ideas. Additionally, the use of conditional structures, such as "some individuals may contend that the role of humans in society tends to be overshadowed by AI," adds depth to the argument. However, there are instances of awkward phrasing, such as "the creativity therein lies transferable thinking for essential situations," which can obscure meaning and disrupt the flow.
  • How to improve: To enhance the variety and effectiveness of sentence structures, the writer should focus on refining awkward phrases for clarity. For example, rephrasing "the creativity therein lies transferable thinking" to "the creativity inherent in humans allows for transferable thinking" would improve clarity. Additionally, incorporating more varied sentence openings and transitions could further enrich the essay’s structure.

• Use Grammar and Punctuation Accurately:

  • Detailed explanation: The essay generally maintains a high level of grammatical accuracy, with few errors present. For instance, the use of commas is mostly correct, as seen in "the ability to communicate effectively, think critically, express emotional feelings would rival." However, there are some punctuation issues, such as missing commas in compound sentences, which can lead to confusion. For example, "useful communication would necessitate collective and empathetic endeavors to convey initiatives, resolve conflicts considering diverse viewpoints" could benefit from additional commas for clarity.
  • How to improve: To improve grammatical accuracy, the writer should review punctuation rules, particularly regarding the use of commas in complex and compound sentences. Practicing sentence diagramming could help identify where additional punctuation is needed. Furthermore, proofreading for common grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement and sentence fragments, would enhance overall accuracy. For instance, the phrase "the use of AI certainly cannot rival humans’ intelligence given a lack of communication and expression skills" could be restructured for clarity and grammatical precision.

In summary, the essay demonstrates a strong command of grammatical range and accuracy, meriting a band score of 8. By focusing on refining awkward phrases, enhancing punctuation accuracy, and ensuring clarity in complex sentences, the writer can further elevate their writing quality.

Bài sửa mẫu

The emergence of technological advancements, particularly artificial intelligence (AI), has stimulated debate over the role of humanity in society. Many individuals argue that the intellect of humans will always be unrivaled compared to that of AI, as AI is merely a product of human ingenuity. This essay will critically examine this viewpoint and argue why I strongly support it.

Granted, the superiority of the human mind lies in its creativity and emotional intelligence—traits that machines, despite their advancements, cannot replicate. First and foremost, human ingenuity can foster more innovative solutions for complex issues. To elaborate, unlike AI, which can be stereotypical and limited due to the algorithms and commands for autonomous operation, humans possess a competitive advantage through their creativity. This creativity allows for transferable thinking in critical situations, promoting more objective viewpoints and effective problem-solving skills. For instance, in the realms of mediation or military strategy, leaders consistently seek various solutions, nurturing more objective perspectives towards conflicting opinions, which can lead to efficient negotiations. Additionally, emotional intelligence (EQ) plays a significant role in conversational environments. In particular, effective communication necessitates establishing networks, conveying emotions, and negotiating successfully.

Moreover, useful communication requires collective and empathetic efforts to convey initiatives and resolve conflicts while considering diverse viewpoints. This approach leads to enhanced mutual appreciation, sympathy, and camaraderie. Such a sympathetic environment can act as a catalyst for more effective collaboration and discussions, nurturing valuable ideas for problem-solving.

However, some individuals may contend that the role of humans in society is increasingly overshadowed by AI. This opinion holds some truth, given that AI demonstrates its prowess in the workforce, with the ability to analyze vast amounts of data with accuracy and a sense of automation, optimizing convenience through applications like facial recognition, self-driving cars, and medical imaging. Nonetheless, the expression and communication capabilities of humans provide a competitive advantage over technological inventions. For example, in politics, mediation, or education, the ability to think critically and express emotional sentiments is crucial. Furthermore, machines are programmed with algorithms and commands for autonomous operation, which limits their capacity to generate original ideas and emphasizes the superiority of humans over AI, particularly in fostering a growth mindset towards generating fresh initiatives.

To encapsulate, the role of humanity in society is unparalleled, as the creativity and emotional intelligence of humans are undeniable. Furthermore, despite the advantages offered by AI in modern workplaces, the use of AI cannot rival human intelligence due to its lack of communication and expression skills, alongside the prohibitively high cost of adopting AI. Thus, it is imperative that future generations optimize the use of machines to enhance human intelligence while preserving the irreplaceable qualities of humanity.